xp_logs | Log: Forge and Paige, Friday evening, unnamed country road

After Paige's less-than-stellar day, Forge still makes an attempt at the dinner date. Things do not go exactly as expected, and a very unexpected announcement is made.

Forge drove carefully down the winding road past Salem Center and
towards the big city, avoiding the interstate during rush hour. Paige
had been silent ever since they'd left the garage, and that alone was
cause for concern. Given the rather incensed swearing in French from
Marie-Ange's room, and Mr. Marko storming out across the back lawn at
about the same time, Forge figured through process of elimination that
the stress levels were somehow X-Men related.

Glancing carefully over as he checked the mirrors, Forge immediately
ruled out his initial dinner plans at La Brava. As good as Paige
looked in jeans, he'd initially hoped for something a little more
upscale, something conducive to being impressed, hopefully showing
gratitude and...

Shaking his head, he brought his full attention back onto the road,
sliding the Jeep smoothly into a turn through the shaded countryside.
"So," he finally ventured with the first words spoken in the last
fifteen minutes, "did this college thing pop up before or after I
emailed you this morning?"

There was a long silence, Paige still staring out the window with eyes
flickering to and fro as she counted trees. Just as he was about to ask the
question the against she quietly answered, "After. You have enough time to
go back and pick up Catseye if you just want to drop me off at the bus stop
up ahead."

Trying not to slam on the brakes, Forge rounded another turn, taking a
deep breath. "No, it's not that. I know something's bothering you and
you wouldn't change things up otherwise. I also know it's something
that's not my business, which frustrates me, but I accept it."

Tapping his fingers against the steering wheel and trying to resist
the urge to just crank up the stereo and comfort himself with the
blistering noise, Forge kept driving as calmly as he could. "And if
you don't want to talk about it," he said softly, "I'm cool with that.
I'm just frustrated at the timing, is all."

"I'm sorry," she said, just as quietly and with a slight crack to her voice.
"I really wanted to go. Spend time with you. We could still... but you
made all these plans." Making a soft whimpering sound as her face crumbled,
she turned back towards the window, squeezing her eyes shut tight. "Bad
day. And I wasn't ready for it."

That did it.

Forge slowed the Jeep down to the side of the road, sending a small
spray of gravel kicking up as he stopped. Turning on the hazard
lights, he pivoted in his seat to look directly at Paige.

"Hey," he insisted firmly, "truth be told, my plans basically just
involve you and me and some potentially wonderful news and anything
beyond that is just window dressing, okay? I don't expect..." He
reached out impulsively, gently taking one of Paige's hands between
his. "Look, I know you've got problems. Issues. Stuff to work out,
whatever. I will happily take a back seat to that if need be, and if
you want my help with it, with anything, you know all you need to do
is ask."

Shaking silently, in a hard attempt to keep herself from making any noise,
she finally took a gasp for breath, ducking her head so she could watch her
beating up sneakers. "I was doing so well," she said, broken up between
sniffles and the occasional whimper. "I'm trying so hard and I just keep
messing up! There's nothing I can do any more, everything just keeps going
wrong, especially when I think I've finally clawed my way back up again-"
Paige broke off as a new wave of sobs overtook her, tears running down her
cheeks, which she then attempted to wipe away with her sleeve. "I thought
I'd be better. I thought everything would be better and I don't know if I
can do this anymore. Especially now."

Unsure of what to do, Forge unbuckled his seat belt, leaning over the
center console to put an arm around Paige's shaking shoulders. "Look,"
he said quietly, "if you screw up, you make it better. If you hurt
someone, you make amends. Friends are going to accept you for who you
are. And everyone else?" He shrugged and smiled. "Screw 'em. I know
you want everything to be better, and god knows I've seen how you work
at it. But if you ask me, you're just amazing as you are. Of course,"
he admitted with a small blush, "I'm not exactly an unbiased observer
here."

His answer only brought on a new wave of sobs, hand going over her face as
she trembled violently, muffled cries escaping her palm. "They're supposed
to be my team! The team that wouldn't even accept me on when I was
perfectly sane, and was very doubtful when I went all Howard Hughes.
There's no way-" Turning, Paige buried her face into his shoulder, clinging
to his waist. "They all think I'm some kind of psycho, and the ones who
don't either hate me or pity me and I'm not sure what's worse. What
happened to my dream? I just don't get it..."

"I... I don't know." Forge admitted, letting her lean into him. "And I
hate saying that. But I really don't know, Paige. I want to say
they're idiots, but I don't know what goes into the team stuff. All I
can do is sit here and offer you stupid empty platitudes about how
yes, you're good enough - but in truth, I don't know." He looked past
her hair out the window to where the sun was setting on the horizon,
then continued.

"Miss Blaire asked me to act as a sort of auxiliary for the team,
helping out with what I do. Things like the fabric for your uniform,
or new flight surfaces for the Blackbird, or Cyclops' visor. But all I
keep thinking of is Mr. Dayspring getting brought back on a stretcher,
or Jetstream hanging in the medlab like a side of meat, or the people
who died six months ago and..." his voice caught in his throat. "It
scares me to death that this is what you want to do. You could be a
doctor or a chemist or a cop or anything you could want. But you want
this. Why?"

Still whimpering, with the occasional wet sniff, she tried to explain, broken
up as her phrasing was. "Can you imagine doing anything but what you do?
My mutation is the best thing that ever happened to me and I want to make
the best of it. I don't want to let something so precious go to waste.
There's so much waste already, so much, and if... if this is one thing that
I can use to it's full potential? I think, I thought, it was worth it."

Forge paused for a moment, then nodded. "Then that's good enough for
me. You let me know what it would take to help you do it better, train
better, train harder - I'll help. C'mon, together we're the smartest
team of physical scientists since Watson and Crick. So you fall from
time to time. You know how many times I fell down trying to learn to
walk on this?" He rapped his leg for emphasis. "But I wasn't going to
give up, and now I can run. And you're a hundred times more stubborn
than I am."

He brushed his hand over Paige's cheek gently, lifting away a tear.
"So hey: try, fail, fall down, get up, try again, succeed. It's the
scientific method."

Raising her eyes to look up at him, Paige gave Forge a watery smile. "God,
I'm such a child. So scared and confused and I thought I was supposed to be
over this already. How'd you get so smart, huh?"

"Quirk of genetics," he replied blithely, "And really? I'm making it
up as I go along. Making up for lost time understanding people, I
think. And it's that which I... I mean... okay, whew." He wiped his
forehead, sitting back. "I was going to tell you this over a nice
expensive dinner, but what is it they say about 'best laid plans of
mice and mutants'?"

Lacing his fingers together, he thought for a moment, trying to choose
his words carefully. Halting a few times, he finally looked up and met
Paige's eyes. "I can bring Jono back."

"I... I..." she stumbled breathlessly, her eyes still red and what little
words she was managing between the trembling gasps, cracked. "You can..?
But. Will he? I? How?"

Forge gave a wide smile, nodding. "Surprise. To be honest, I owe the
idea to your mental breakdown and crazy ghosts from the future. Which
fits, since this is probably the most insane idea I've ever come up
with. And now that I have your interest..." He reached for the
ignition, cranking the Jeep's engine. "Dinner?"