Jean and Hank and Billy

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

After some fifteen hours unconscious, Jean finally wakes up



Jean blinked, coming instantly awake with that strange uncertainty about how she had gotten wherever she was floating in her mind. It was even worse than usual after fifteen hours of sleep, helped along by her exhaustion and Charles' compulsion letting her not suffer dreams. She wasn't entirely sure she could sit up, just yet, but she turned her head and made out a fuzzy, bright blue blur next to her and a little, yellow blur on (presumably) Hank's chest. "What happened this time?" she asked, reaching up to rub the sleep out of her eyes.

Hank blinked awake himself, yawning. He really shouldn't be napping in the Medlab, but he'd been careful not to let himself go beyond a light doze. "What happened?" he repeated, reaching over to touch her hand lightly. "A certain lovely redhead overworked herself until she passed out, literally. You've been sleeping far less even than I, it seems." Billy stirred, and he rubbed the tiny back with his fingertips. "There, now, we're all awake now..."

Even as Hank started to answer the memories flowed back into Jean and she moaned softly, turning to bury her head in her pillow as the feeling of the paranoia and insanity returned, although separated from her by the long sleep. "Hell," she muttered into the pillow.

Hank wrapped his hand around hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Do you feel any better now that you're not in the later stages of sleep deprivation?" he asked gently. "Paige was the cause, I assume..."

"'M-hm," she agreed into the pillow. "Nightmares every time I shut my eyes..." But she really didn't want to dwell on them. Or talk about them. "And some seriously bad decisions. And I'm going to have to make some serious apologies to Scott. And Charles. And you and Maddie and Moira." She looked up at that. "Christ, you would think I would have outgrown some of the stupidity..."

"Oh, now, if you weren't very foolish now and then we'd have to toss you out of the Medlab for not being brilliant anymore," Hank said comfortingly. "It takes the really bright ones to make the really stupid mistakes." He smiled at her. "And that was very stupid," he added with mock-gravity. "I am reminded of something a very pretty redhead told me, years ago, something along the lines of 'if you're going to act like such a complete pigheaded moron, Hank, you have to EXPECT me to knock you out and put you outside in a mud puddle...'."

A little smile stole across her face at the memory. "Well, then, my medlab position is safe for the conceivable future, and I am sorry..."

"I trust that my not putting you in a puddle of anything has suitably demonstrated my moral superiority." Hank grinned. "Would you like to hold the baby? I imagine that sleepy-baby thoughts must be quite restful..."

"It would have, but then there is the whole question of the time you stole all of my underwear, and the drawers, and hid them throughout the school." Rolling back over, Jean sat up, leaning against the headboard. "Yes, please, though. Billy's good at the calm-thoughts thing."

"I was much younger then. Now that I'm a parent, I must be more mature. And sensible." Hank lifted Billy out of the sling, and tucked him gently into Jean's arms. He made an inquiring little noise, looking up at her with wide eyes. He was so beautiful, Hank thought proudly.

"Yeah, sure..." Jean managed before being totally taken over with the armful of baby. "Aren't you just the cutest?" she cooed at Billy, hearing Hank's proud thoughts and the baby's sense of safety.

"He is the most beautiful baby ever born, naturally," Hank said, touching a tiny fist lightly. "Doesn't every parent think so? And... he IS my son. I was worried about it, that I might not feel as if he was, right at first... but he is." He smiled a little. "Family is the people who love you, as many of us here have learned, and nobody could possibly love him more than I do."

The little fist uncurled at the soft touch, and Jean could sense the wordless sense of joy. "He very much is," she agreed softly. "And you are very much his."

"Really?" Hank brightened. "You can tell what he's thinking? Is he happy? Does he want anything?" His face fell a little. "He and Dani... aren't really very close. She really isn't ready to be a parent, and aside from feeding him, she rather avoids him."

"It's not... it's not thinking. It's not thought, persay. Or, rather, it's pure thought. Formless." Jean's voice was distant, her gaze abstracted and she didn't seem to be fully focused on what Hank was saying, the physical closeness of the baby keeping her focus on him. "Wordless. Closer to straight emotion than thought, maybe."

"Can you describe it?" Hank asked hopefully, letting Billy's tiny fingers twine in a lock of his fur. His fingers were just too big for holding onto, which saddened him sometimes.

"Words don't... words don't work," she said softly. But... very carefully, making certain not to touch Billy's mind, she reached out with the faint touch of projection she'd regained, showing Hank what she could not help but feel, from the both of them.

Hank had never felt anything quite like it.Well, not since he'd been old enough to remember. Taking a slightly wobbly breath, he took Billy and held him very close. "I love you too," he whispered. "Very much. And I'll always take care of you." The absolute love and trust was... humbling. Very much so.

The baby no longer in her arms, it was easier for Jean to regain her sense of the world around her, but harder for her to keep hold of the sense of Billy's thoughts without reaching out for them. She maintained the touch on Hank's mind for as long as she could, though, smiling at the two of them, even as her conscious grasp on her powers faded.

Hank felt the brief touch fade, and smiled, leaning down to kiss Jean's forehead lightly. "Thank you," he said softly, his voice just a little unsteady. "That... meant a very great deal."

"He's uncomplicated," she told Hank. "Uncomplicated, and he feels safe, and loved, and loves. There's not enough of that in the world, for any of us."

"Well, he's going to get all he wants," Hank said softly. "And he knows I'm his parent." He sighed contentedly, as Billy clutched at his fur with soft fingers. "Although if I didn't know better, I would suspect you of deliberately totally distracting me from my lecture with the tugging of heartstrings."

"I would never do that, ever." Jean managed to maintain her smile, although it dimmed. "Besides, I deserve the lecture."

"I know you wouldn't. Although if you ever did, I wouldn't mind one bit. It was wonderful." Hank wrapped his free arm around her shoulders, hugging her gently. "And I don't think I really need to lecture you... you know you were foolish, and you'll try not to do it any more, right?"

That got him a wry look as she leaned into his hug. "Given I didn't try to do it in the first place, I'd say that was a safe bet."

"Good." He snuggled them both, feeling very, very happy. "And any time you start feeling overwrought again, tell me, and I'll let you wallow in some pure thought for a little while."

"Will do." Hank's happy thoughts were infectious, and she'd slept to well to maintain a sour mood. But... "What time is it, Hank? I should find Scott and talk to him."

"It's... nearly two in the morning. I imagine he's finally passed out by now." Hank grinned rather impishly. "Not that I imagine he'd object to having a newly rested and cheered lady creeping into bed with him."

"Take it as read that I'm going to swat you for that one. Not now, though. Baby." Sitting up, Jean pushed her hair out of her face. "I don't think, really, that waking him up is going to be the best way to apologize for not sleeping. And... well, it needs doing. Can you write me up a prescription for some sleeping pills?"

"Of course. Something fairly mild, to start off with." Hank nodded. "You know the drill. And I don't know... I can think of a few ways of being woken up that would make me forgive just about anything." He grinned, holding Billy between them. "Can't hit me, think of the baby..."

"Ooooh, you're so dead at some point in the future, Hank McCoy. Hiding behind a baby, what sort of an example are you setting for him? And yes, I know the drill."

Hank laughed, and kissed the top of her head gently. "How about I start making my apologies with a cup of coffee and a sandwich? You must be starving, after all that foodless sleep."

"I'll take you up on the sandwich, and maybe some cocoa. Let's not speak of coffee for a few days..."

"No coffee. Understood." Hank nodded. "But cocoa can be arranged. Or we have some tea..."

"Cocoa, and food. And then I think I'll take half a pill and get some more sleep. I'm not sure how I can still be tired, but there it is." Well, maybe not 'tired', but there was still a sense of exhaustion in her.

"More sleep is probably good." Hank nodded, and gave her a reassuring smile. "And I'll be right here, to handle anything that happens, so you can sleep without worrying."

"Thank you, Hank. You are too good to me, you know that?"

Hank grinned teasingly. "Always. Really, I'm so wonderful sometimes I just can't stand it."