LOG: Jennie, Amanda and filthy habits

[x-roulette.livejournal.com]

Backdated to Tuesday, Amanda goes outside for some fresh air, and meets Jennie. The two talk about bad habits.



The thing about spending so much time in medlab was
that you tended to crave fresh air and sunshine. True,
the work wasn't onerous - the doctors were keeping a
vague eye on her and Moira tended to kick her out if
she started looking too tired - but she was spending a
lot of time under the dim lights and in the slightly
chilly air in Tommy's room. Thus it was that she was
curled up in a corner of the back porch, a magic text
open in her lap and a cigarette burning between her
fingers.

There were limits to how much fresh air a city girl
could take, after all.

Good God Almighty, it was hot. And Jennie was bored.
While both Shiro and Kyle had been amusing themselves
with endless hours of DDR in the rec room, there was
only so much mindlessness Jennie could take. Besides,
they wouldn't let her play, damnit. So Jennie found
herself wandering outside to indulge in her dirty
little secret.

"Son of a bitch." She muttered to herself, flicking
the switch on her lighter until her thumb hurt. Well,
she would be indulging it if her ligther still had
fluid.

"Here," came a accented girl's voice, and Jennie
looked up to see Amanda holding out her lighter. "Use
mine."

"Why thank you." Jennie said, as she leaned her
cigarette into the flame and inhaled, lighting the
tip. She took a deep drag and exhaled. "God, I
needed that. I don't do it very often but, y'know,
Amanda, right?"

The other girl nodded. "Yeah, that'd be me. Jennie,
yeah? The one with the luck powers?"

Jennie nodded. "Yeah, that's me. Although, I seem to
only get one side of the power and not the other."

"Seems t' be the way of it 'round here." Amanda looked
the girl up and down. Pretty, friendly enough, but
there was something guarded in her attitude, cautious.
Something Amanda recognised. So, not one of the 'nice'
kids, the ones from normal backgrounds. Making her
mind up, she waved her hand at the collection of
chairs that had accumulated on the back porch. "Pull
up a pew, if you like. How're you findin' the
madhouse?" she asked, flipping the heavy tome closed
and putting it down on the bench beside her.

Jennie plopped down next to Amanda and sucked on her
cigarette thoughtfully. "It's...strange." She said
finally. "Like, when I first came here I thought it
was way too good to be true, y'know? Like, I had come
to shangri-la, free food, good schooling, I mean, they
even give me money for christ's sake, and I kept being
all paranoid. Like, when were they gonna kick me
out? There's always a flip side, y'know? Then all
these things kept happening, students kept getting
beat up, people left for dead outside the gates, and
now Mr. al-Rashid and Mr. Dayspring. I thought it was
me. Because I do things like that." Jennie looked at Amanda. "Bad
luck and all. But then I realised that things like
this had happened before I came here. So, I
can relax a bit. I guess." Jennie smiled ruefully.
"I'm sorry, didn't mean to talk your ear off."

Amanda answering smile was amused, but not mocking.
"'S another thing about this place you'll notice, it
makes you talk. Even when you didn't really much
before. 'S okay." She took a drag on her cigarette,
thinking about what Jennie had said. "There's a lot of
dramas here," she said at last. "The teachers try an'
keep us from harm, but 's the thing 'bout bein' what
we are, it tends t' attract trouble. 'S like the
balance, like you said. There's got t' be a price for
a place like this, an' the odd spot of drama tends t'
be it." She looked at Jennie, judging her reaction,
and decided she'd have to find out eventually.
"Doesn't help we've got the X-Men operatin' out of the
basement."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Huh," she grunted, and then
shrugged. "I kinda guessed already," Jennie said,
sheepishly. "I mean, it's easy to put two and two
together. But I didn't want to ask to confirm it or
anything, incase it wasn't my place."

"It's sort of an open secret," Amanda explained,
tapping ash over the railing. "The teachers don't tell
us anythin', but it's a bit hard t' miss the jet
comin' out of the basketball court an' teachers
walkin' around injured, an' then puttin' that together
with reports on the news. If you want t' know, you can
ask - there's a bunch of the older kids on the trainee
roster. But they don't recruit people or anythin' like
that." Amanda's tone made it clear the chances of her
becoming a trainee were pretty slim.

"I think I'd like to actually try being in school
first before I go off and save the world or anything.
Man. This place..." Jennie trailed off. "So how you
doin? If you don't mind my asking? I mean, I was
reading about, your, y'know," Jennie gestured at the
older girl awkwardly. "I'm sorta experienced when it
comes to those things."

"My habit?" Amanda said bluntly. If Jennie was used to
junkies, using the word wasn't going to make her faint
dead away. And Amanda was very much about calling a
spade a metal thing for digging holes with. "It's...
better than it was. I've been hooked on me power for a
while now an' had an accident with the charm that
keeps me operatin' as normal. Which is why the drama."
She wrinkled her nose a bit, a touch embarrassed about
the grandstanding. "But I've got a new source now, an'
that helps." Jennie was in the same suite as Meggan,
she remembered now, and that led to certain questions.
And awkwardness. "Um, how's Meg doin'? Settlin'
better?"

"Hey, trust me, the drama has been pretty low-key.
Meggan's been doing alright, I guess. I mean, she
misses you. A lot. And she had herself a tantrum or
two, and she can't understand why she has to go to bed
earlier than the rest of us. Dani has the patience of
a saint." Jennie reached out and nudged Amanda with
her elbow. "You know, beating yourself up over
something you can't quite control doesn't help
anyone. 'Specially you. I know! When you've got a
break, why not come up for a visit? We can have a
girl's night, with us and Meggan, to help her feel
like more part of the group?"

"Tryin' not t' beat meself up, 's just...
complicated." Amanda glanced over at Jennie, not sure
of how much to tell. "Meg's power an' mine... they
mesh, sort of. An' I ended up usin' her. Same as I
would any other mystic object. It didn't hurt her none
an' I didn't mean to, but there's things in me past...
I sort of freaked out." Jennie was listening with that
same slightly sympathetic expression. "You know how it
is, don't you? Who was it? Friend or family?"

Jennie shifted uncomfortably. "My Mom. As long as I can remember she's been addicted to something or another. I mean, growing up, I thought it was normal to have mirrors and razors in the bathroom, and not just for vanity's sake, if you get my drift. Every so often she'd try and come clean, she's been to rehab twice now. But, I don't think she really wants to quit. I think something bad musta happened to her, because it was bigger than me. She wouldn't quit just for me." Jennie looked at Amanda, who was listening intently. "I mean, you at least wanna be clean. I respect that. You didn't decide to have one last binge and drop off the face of the earth and scare Meggan half to death. I mean, she doesn't got you to herself 24-7 anymore, but at least she knows where you are."

"Sorry, didn't mean t' pry, but... there's not a lot of people here who get what it's like, an' in a way I don't want 'em to. Bad enough the bollocks they see on TV 'bout addicts, the truth's uglier. They don't realise, even with Rom's charm, the feelin's still there, all the time. The charm just makes it easier t' ignore, I s'pose. Cuts back on the physical shite." Amanda gave Jennie a shaky, rueful smile. "I appreciate it, you tellin' me that. An' I'm sorry 'bout yer mum. You're right, I do wanna get clean, an' I'm takin' steps there. Just... hard not t' feel like I let her down, y'know? Her an' the other people who worry 'bout me. Still, feelin' like that, I s'pose it means I'm not completely gone, right?"

Jennie smiled. "Exactly. And one of these days you'll be strong enough to kick the habit. I mean, I of all people shouldn't be all optimistic, 'specially with my experience. But, seems like optimisim is the only thing I got left now." Jennie stubbed the cigarette out on the bottom of her shoe and flicked the butt into the can perched on the porch step. "You'll be okay, and so'll Meggan."

"We will." Amanda laughed suddenly, shaking her head a little. "Y'know, you're all right. You'll do good here, I think."

Jennie giggled herself. "Yeah, who knows? Maybe I'll grow up to be a big damn hero myself."