xp_logs | Jay & Marius, whoa backdated (Reply)

Set towards the end of December, after the suite fight and Jay's self-imposed exile to Sam's. Jay decides he owes Marius an apology for what he said. But then Marius has to go and open his big mouth again, so Jay leaves. Boys.

In spite of how it probably seemed to his roommates, there were indeed times that Marius was not on his way to, from, or actively involved in his workout regime. Now, for example. He was, in fact, in his room doing a little preliminary research on the internet in response to a vague idea for an independent project. As the only time he closed the door to his room was when he actually occupied it, it didn't come as much surprise that one of his roommates noticed he was in.

A knock roused him from the slight glaze that came of three straight hours poring over documents primarily written in legalese. Welcoming the interruption, Marius pushed away from his computer, swiveling his chair towards the door. "Yeah?" he said, the word framed as an invitation.

Jay had spent the better part of a week in Sam's suite, only coming out to get food or when he was sure no one would bug him in the Holiest of Holies, the music room. But now Kyle was giving him growly looks (and Jay did miss him), so he decided to move back. But before he could do that, he owed someone an apology.

"Hey," he said to Marius as he opened the door to his room. "You busy?" Jay figured that Marius wasn't one to hold a grudge, so this would be over with quickly. Not like that did much to calm him. He didn't like being in the wrong.

Marius blinked at the unexpected visitor, then smiled anyway. He shrugged. "Nah, just gettin' a jump-start on some work. Don't tell anyone. It's more fun when no one's harborin' expectations of me. Or not high ones, at any rate." He nodded Jay in amiably. "So, what's up?"

"Ah . . . Ah wanted to tell you Ah'm sorry," Jay said, standing in the doorway, hesitant to fully enter the room. "About what Ah said to you. You know, about the mouths?" He tried not to wince as he recalled the exact insult.

It actually took Marius a minute to recall what Jay was apologizing for. Not that he'd forgotten, exactly, it was just that the sense of being insulted had lingered a little longer than the actual words. And for Marius, even the impression didn't have much of a shelf-life.

"Ah, no worries," Marius grinned, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms behind his head. "It's not like it was totally unfounded." He spent a moment trying to run back over the conversation, but the specifics eluded him, so he settled for his usual mode of apologizing: general. "Sorry if I was insensitive an' that. Bit of a bad habit. Problem bein' I don't actually notice most of the time."

Jay shook his head. "S'okay. There was a lotta out-of-liness" – which could be a real word if you think about it - "all around. So, we're cool?"

Marius snorted. "Mate, if I carried a grudge against everyone who ever told me to go to hell I wouldn't be able to walk. Especially if I drove 'em to it. I'm talented that way." He grinned again, swivelling from side to side. "How you holdin' up, then? With the Tommy thing an' that."

The doorway wasn't very comfortable, so Jay stepped inside to learn against the wall instead. Arms crossed, he shrugged in response to Marius's question. "Ignorin' it, mostly. Haven't seen hide nor hair of him since, so it ain't no thing now."

Marius was not quite so dense as to pursue this train of conversation, so he settled for a nod. "Back to talkin' to the resident mad scientist yet? Doubt he's buildin' deathrays over it, but I think we could all do with a bit less tense." Not that he'd actually been noticing it much, but he figured it was a safe enough assumption.

Not like this train of conversation was any better. But Jay tried not to tense up. In fact, he even managed to keep his frustration out of his wings, which were usually tell-tale signs of his unhappiness. "Ah don't think that's gonna happen any time soon," he said, just a little angrily.

"Don't want to bollocks this up," Marius said slowly, "but I probably will, so just hear me through, right? I'm not sayin' don't be angry. You're talkin' to the bloke who stole his bloody leg here. Just sayin' it's better to have it over an' done with. For you, I mean. The slow burn -- it can't feel good carryin' that around all the time." It certainly hadn't when Marius had been doing it. The experience had only vindicated his existing opinion. He probably wasn't explaining it well, but it was the best he could think of. "Just . . . sounded to me like you've got enough to deal with. You don't need that, too."

"This ain't a matter of let's agree ta disagree, dude. Ah can't 'deal' with the fact that the guy who tried ta kill me is walkin' around here a free man when mah best friend, the fella who found me ain't willin' ta back me up." Jay wasn't shaking yet, but his knuckles of his clenched fists were turning white.

"Easy, mate." Kyle was definitely going to kick his ass for this. "It's just you an' me in here right now. We can just talk this through, right?" Not that anything about Jay screamed he wanted to, but if Marius was going to have his ass kicked anyway he might as well keep going. He sighed and attempted to unearth his experience negotiating between insensed teammates. Rugby had not prepared him for this level of mediation.

"Maybe he doesn't back you on Tommy, but seems a safe bet he does back you. I never heard him say you didn't have a right to be pissed, or that you didn't have a shit time of it -- it's just that it's Forge, an' he's got this problem about mentioning the bits he does agree on when he's arguin' a point. It's not you he's against." Marius shook his head, raising his hands in an act of preemptive surrender. "I know I'm probably half talkin' out my arse here. He tried to kill you. Tommy, I mean. That's pretty bloody personal, an' I don't have anything that stacks up against it. But this thing with Forge -- that's not. Not how I'm readin' it, anyway. Which could be wrong, since I'm a bit shite at this sort of thing, so if I am feel free to knock me one. I've got it comin' for something, I'm sure. But if I'm right . . . carryin' it around does you no good, mate. You don't need that."

"Do you think Ah want ta be angry at Forge?" Jay demanded, throwing his arms up in the air. "That Ah likeavoidin' him and tip-toein' around mah own room so Ah don't end up smackin' him? He's supposed ta be mah best damn friend! But he's so caught up in his own 'quest for redemption' or whatever that he doesn't see what he's doin' ta me!"

Marius shrugged. "Then tell him. An' if it comes to that, maybe you should smack him. Do you both good." Marius resumed swiveling himself back and forth in the chair, wondering vaguely what about this Jay wasn't getting. It seemed perfectly obvious to him. "So you'll fight if you talk. Big deal. You're fightin' now. Least you'd have a shot at resolvin' something if you're both in the same actual room."

"Yeah, because gettin' into another fight will make things so much better," Jay scoffed. "Ah've gotta head out now. Kyle and Ah're goin' to the movies tonight." Or at least they would be, once Jay found the boy and told him they're going out. He was having another bout of 'get me the Hell out of here.'

Marius gave the other boy a wry smile. Jay would do what he liked, that much was obvious. Well, who was he to tell anyone what to do? "Ahh, go have fun, then," he said with a careless wave. "Just remember, doesn't solve anything."