Wanda and Haller

[x-scarletwitch.livejournal.com]

Unable to find some peace and quiet, Wanda flees to the next best thing...the nearly empty mansion. Lucky for her, Jim's around for her to uncope with.



The lake was lovely, as always, if a bit chilly. Wanda sprawled on the grass near the boathouse, shoes in the near by and feet dangling into the water. The water was cooler than the air but it was relaxing, in it's own masochistic fashion. But the quiet was nice, especially after the hectic nature of the office and home. Everywhere she turned there was someone right around the corner, all of them talking about the same damned thing.

"Argh."


"Wanda?"

The voice was mildly disbelieving. Jim stood behind her, somewhat rumpled and holding a lighter and packet of cigarettes in one hand. He gave her a look that suggested he was either not entirely sure she was real or that he'd been awake long enough that he wasn't sure whether this detail was important. "It is you. I thought I saw your hair from the kitchen. What're you doing here?"

Unable to find the energy to sit up, she tilted her head backwards so she could stare up at him. "In a city the size of New York, plus the surrounding area between here and said city, this was the quietest place I could find," she offered as a kind of explanation. "Not surprising since this is a possible target for the giant space laser in space." Her voice wavered in disbelief on the "space laser" part. "You look as tired as I feel."

"Well, the professor's not sleeping, so I decided to keep him company." Jim regarded the prone woman for a moment, then lowered himself down on the grass next to her. He thumbed out a cigarette and twisted to put the pack into his pocket. "Considering you guys are hosting the trainees, I can't say I'm surprised. How're you doing over there? I'm amazed I haven't heard anything about Kyle having an asthma attack from all the smoke."

With some effort, Wanda rolled herself over onto her side so she could prop her head up and talk to Jim at the same time. "It is...hectic," she said, wryly. "I suspect that in a few days, we are going to have people going insane on top of each other. One of the reasons I came out here, I was going nuts. Besides, having to flee DC certainly gave me an interesting sleepless night."

She buried her head in her arm and stared at the grass. "Jim? My daddy has a space laser pointed at two capital cities." It was said sarcastically but she was suddenly very tired and not sure of how to think about anything.

"Yeah." Jim stared at his cigarette tiredly and said, "Our daddy's upset about your daddy's space laser."

A noise, half a sigh of frustration, half laugh came after that. "Aren't we the pair?" she asked, reaching over to pat his knee. "So I am not the only one currently with cope failure? That makes me feel better."

"Personally, knowing I'm not one of those bound for spacetravel is what's doing it for me." Jim smiled and put the cigarette in the corner of his mouth. "Speaking of fathers, did I ever tell you about the other month? When we met Magneto in one those 'stans Nate's always going to he hit me in the head with a pipe. Considering the circumstances it was actually kind of gentle. I wonder if Aunt Gaby threatened him when they talked. I mean, they used to be friends."

"A pipe? He hit you in the head with a pipe? I honestly don't know if I should laugh or pat you on the head. Though, you are right, all things considered it could have been worse. He could have run you through with the pipe." She wrinkled her nose at the thought. "You know, I thought I was used to the whole 'father is a supervillain' thing but, honestly, this takes the cake."

It was an odd shift, but she suddenly asked, "Do you know Laurie's father? I met him tonight and I found out that when he was at the school, he had mentioned my mother. Zach knew he'd had a wife." So many pieces of a puzzle that weren't fitting.

Jim frowned. He didn't know much about this particular family dynamic, but from the tone of Wanda's voice it sounded as if she'd just come up against highly unlikely odds. "Was it something he usually kept secret?" he asked around his cigarette, flicking open the lighter.

Wanda contemplated a grass stalk that was right next to her eye. "I have no clue. I just assumed that after my mother ran, he forgot all about her. He got in contact with us once when I was younger -- mother was insane and scared of him but I think at that point she might have been willing to let him talk to us. We may have manifested by then, I cannot remember. But she gave him an ultimatum -- either come over and be in our lives totally, meaning leaving everything he was working for behind, or leave us be. I sometimes wonder what kind of man he would have been if he had come over. Or what kind of person I would have been if he had. I sometimes feel...ah. Guilt, I suppose."

The end of the cigarette glowed as Jim took a drag. "For what?" he asked, letting the smoke stream from his nostrils. "Because you couldn't make him choose you?" He lifted the cigarette to his lips, then paused. His hand lowered, and he turned slowly to regard Wanda full in the face. "Or because you didn't take the chance to save him?"

"I was told that the sins of our fathers should not be passed down to their children but what if we take on that burden on ourselves?" she asked, pushing herself up into a sitting position but she didn't break eye contact with Jim. "I had the chance to find him but I said no. And what's worse, I made my brother promise he would not leave until college. What if that could have made all the difference?"

Jim shook his head. "There's a lot of what if-ing going around right now, and I've still only got the one answer. Nothing we do now can change what we did or who we were back then. Like, if Aunt Gaby had told the professor about me from the start -- would I have killed anyone? Would I still have gone crazy? Would it have changed his life?" The telepath rolled the cigarette between his fingers, dropping his eyes to watch the end smolder. "Maybe it would have been better, but if I keep thinking about it all I'm going to end up doing is resenting the present for what it's not, and hating myself for letting it be that way . . . and them, too." He lifted his mismatched eyes and gave the woman a faint, sad smile. "We got tired of hate a long time ago."

Wanda looked up at the sky for a moment and took a deep breath. When she looked back, there was a not often seen vulnerable look on her face. "I have seen things that would turn most people's hair white but the thing that scares me the most in this world is my father. I am scared of what he can do, of the fact that he might decide I am a valuable enough asset to come after -- or enough of a problem -- and of the fact that maybe, just maybe, somewhere deep down I am exactly like him. I am terrified and it is not something I am used to."

The telepath took a drag to buy himself a moment to think. There'd been a lot in that; in the end, he chose to focus on what seemed the most important. "It's not about what he is, it's what he's chosen to do with it. If he'd made a difference choice he could have done as much good as he's done bad. As long as you hold to the choices you've made, I don't think having that potential in you is anything to be frightened of."

Jim knew what needed to come next. If she'd been Betsy or Lorna, or he'd been Davey, he would have hugged her. Unfortunately neither situation was present, so Jim started to reach out in a half-hug, second-guessed himself, chickened out, and settled for the world's most awkward back-pat.

That got a laugh out of her and Wanda leaned over to give Jim what was probably also an incredibly awkward one-armed hug while still trying to prop herself up with her other arm. When she pulled back, she snickered at him and herself. "We are quite the pair," she sighed, expression easing from the pinched look. I ate some dinner but apparently being slightly emo, as Mark would say, has stirred my appetite. We should raid the fridge. After all, ice cream in the freezer would just go to waste with so many people going into space."

Well, that was something she'd never thought she'd actually say.

"I think we'll stick with nicotine. Does sugar counteract the angst?" Jim unfolded and reached down to help Wanda to her feet.

"Sugar and copious amounts of alcohol. Since I'm currently on duty, I believe I will have to stick to the sugar route this time." She grabbed her shoes from the ground and held out her arm to Jim. "Shall we?"

"Sure. But no piggyback rides this time. Jean's going into space and I don't want to have to explain that to Amelia."