Scott and Laurie: Reaping the whirlwind

[x-wallflower-.livejournal.com]

Laurie finally goes to talk to Scott. Things don't go exactly how she planned, and Scott gives her something important to think on.



Laurie was waiting for Scott outside the Dangerroom, unconcerned with whether it would be a long wait or not. He'd said she could come talk to him any time she liked, but this had been the first moment she'd had, and she didn't want to leave it and possibly get too busy to talk again.

The doors slid open and Scott walked out, sweaty and out of breath. His gaze fell on Laurie and his expression went a little more neutral. "I was half-expecting you to drop by the office," he said.

"I wanted to catch you before I got too busy again to talk." Laurie replied, falling into step with him. She didn't really want to stand around in the hallway outside the Danger room and Scott would probably want to change after his workout.

Scott's reply was monosyllabic. He hadn't really been looking forward to this conversation, although he'd figured it was inevitable. It wasn't like our last talk was a thing of beauty. "Why do teammates of the opposite gender consistently pick post-DR moments for these conversations?" he asked. "One of these days I'm actually going to wander right into the shower, just to see the reaction..."

"I plead the fifth, as I work with your wife and I seriously do not need to be having those images pop into my head at inopportune moments." Laurie noted, a teasing glint in her eyes despite the seriousness of the talk she was wanting to have. "You seemed a little alarmed at what I did during the fight with War."

Scott raised an eyebrow. "I didn't think you were noticing much of anything right at that moment."

"I was lucid, mostly. It's hard to do something that big without concentrating on it fully. Dad mentioned it afterwards though." Laurie admitted. "I'm not sorry I did it though, that's not what this is about."

She really had no idea, did she? Scott's expression remained neutral, however, as they turned into the locker room. He contented himself with just taking off the jacket for now; he really did need a shower, but it would have to wait.

This was the part that was hard, the thing she'd been thinking about since Post's little speech to her. "What do you think of me? As a person, I mean." Laurie asked, stalling, but she needed time, dammit.

Scott, his jacket half-unfastened, froze at the question. "I'm sorry," he said, and the deadpan tone just insisted on happening. "I don't understand the question in this context."

Laurie thrust her hands into her pockets to contain them. After a moment she pulled one of them out and walked over to him, holding her hand out. "I want you to take these." she said

Scott half-turned, looked down at the trainee pins in her hand. Raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"I left my Dad, back around the second day we were in the city, I think it was." Laurie said, trying to keep control of her voice, even as the hand that held her pins shook slightly. "He shot someone, and so I left him because I thought it was more important to obey my conscience then stick together. He found me again later, saved me from Post. He could have died."

"And that's why you're giving me your trainee pins?"

"Some of it." Laurie admitted. "I've been making bad choices lately. I figure you'd feel better if you weren't having to worry about sending me out on training missions."

"Don't make this about me," Scott said warningly, sliding out of his jacket. "Not in the slightest. I don't 'have' to worry about sending you out on training missions - if I decide to bench you, you're benched. And you certainly shouldn't be making decisions based on whether or not it would make me feel better."

"Then why haven't you?" Laurie asked, pushing her hand back into her pocket. "You've got more then enough reason to."

"Because X-Men don't spring fully formed like Athena from Charles's forehead," Scott said brusquely, hanging up his jacket. "And if I can't bear with the growing pains, I don't belong in this job."

"What do you suggest I do then?" Laurie asked, the feel of the little pins under her fingers felt like a reprieve of sorts. She'd been afraid...She wasn't sure what of. "I get the feeling, shocking, I know, that you and the others don't trust me much anymore."

"If you really do want my advice - I'd stop thinking so much about what the rest of us think of you," Scott said, turning away from his locker and sitting down on the bench. "Start thinking about how, or if, you want to do this job, and the contribution you can make if you decide, for yourself, to stay around. Stop looking for approval," he said, and while his voice wasn't harsh, there was something very hard in it, "and focus on what needs to be done."

"And if I do decide I want to keep going, what then?" Laurie asked. "You said something about talking to the Professor, before everything hit the fan."

"Well, yes," Scott muttered and propped a foot on the lockers, undoing his boot. "None of what's happened changes the fact that you need to work on your coping skills. Not to mention your inter-team interpersonal skills."

She felt like pointing out that others weren't exactly that great at interpersonal skills either but she figured that would go over like a lead balloon. Time, as Scott said, to start worrying about herself and leave others to worry about anything else.

"I'm not going to have to write essays, am I?" she asked, a smile touching the sides of her mouth briefly to show she was joking...mostly. You could never really tell what people were going to drop on you sometimes.

Scott just shrugged. "I make no promises," he said, brusquely enough to make it clear he wasn't sharing in the joke. "You'll do what we feel is necessary for you to do, if you continue training."

"I'll leave you to your shower then." Laurie said, suiting action to words as she walked toward the locker room doors. "I'll let you know what I've decided in a couple of days."

Scott's head turned to watch her go, and for a moment, he toyed with the idea of pointing out a few more pertinent points. But if she was still debating... he shrugged, and turned his attention to his other boot. No need to get into the really complicated issues unless she decided to stay on.