xp_logs | Morgan & Karolina

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Morgan offers the girl an out from her self-defense class and takes a chance to build trust with the unhappy student.

Karolina wanted to hide. She always sat in the back of the class during the lecture portion and no longer even bothered to go into the locker room to change for the rest of the class. She'd taken out Radical Pacifism, found her place again while the room cleared out and done her best to blend into the scenery. Unfortunately, when the other students were gone, Karolina still wasn't alone. Oh God, she's going to hit me, was Kare's first terrified thought at realizing she was alone with Morgan. Her second was much the same and the rainbow aura that surrounded her flashed pink then blue then vanished into palest gold. Knowing she probably looked terrified, she shrank into herself and looked back down at her book, shoulders set defensively.

Angelo had been given a head's up before class that Morgan was going to offer an out to Karolina by way of talking to Haller so when he and the class had filed out he'd known already Morgan wasn't going to be following for a bit. Looking at Karolina, the tiny little barely glowing thing that was clearly attempting to fold in on herself until she disappeared completely, Morgan wondered just how much the glowing red eyes worked against her. If Karolina was that scared of Morgan the red eyes couldn't help, could they? The soldier's posture likely didn't help either so she relaxed her shoulders and allowed them to slump a bit before walking over and leaning against the wall near Karolina. She gave the girl enough room so as to not make her feel more trapped than she already did, hopefully.

"I know you've been having a shit time of things," she began with a tone much softer than the one she used while lecturing or demonstrating things in class. "Personally, I think we might need to put you on a leash but I'm not stupid enough to think that will actually do any good, not really. So, I'm going to offer you something more constructive to do with your class period. You don't participate, I get why and while I think you make the entire issue a little too black and white I do actually respect your stance. That doesn't change the fact that you're failing because of your 'peaceful resistance.' I'm willing to give you full class credit if you do take me up on this offer, but don't consider it a bribe, it's not. I simply feel that if you are doing something with the class period which is sanctioned by the instructor, in this case myself, and which is constructive to your personal progress that you should earn credit for it."

It was different enough from what Karolina expected that she frowned and looked up at Morgan, wondering where this was leading. "What's that?" she replied with a bravado she didn't feel, "Films about non-violent resistance ending badly? Essays on Orwell's theories about how non-violent resistance is an attempt by the privileged to impose morality the working poor? I'm more aware of the nuance that you think."

"Actually, it is nothing that in any way relates to pacifism, self-defense, or violence. At least certainly not in terms of this class or your ethical stance on it." Morgan watched her closely. She was watching Karolina's body language because it was easier for her to read that the colors that radiated from the girl's skin. "I think that something needs to change but sending you home isn't exactly an option. I think nothing will change and you will never be happy until we can figure out what, aside from sending you home, we can do that will make you happier here for the duration of the time your parents' wish for you to be with us. I also think you have a lot of concerns and thoughts that should be aired but need to be said to someone you don't feel is passing judgment on you. I also think that person can't be someone who is one of your teachers because you or they may assume or have a bias which is unproductive." Morgan paused, unsure how well this was going to go over.

Oh, she saw where this was going now. They wanted her to get her attitude fixed, like she was the one that was broken. Time to shove the weird girl back into line. "Thanks but I have a therapist. We talk once a week. And the only thing that's going to make me happier here is not being treated like I'm some kind of unfeeling monster because my parents are rich instead of dead."

The sigh never made it out of Morgan's mouth but it certainly manifested clearly in her mind. She's just a teenager being a teenager, she told herself to remain calm with the girl. "There is no inference that you are an unfeeling monster," she told Karolina patiently. "Quite the opposite. I think you have a lot of emotions and a therapist is paid to listen to you. Haller, however, will do it without that incentive. He gets paid to be the school's counselor whether or not you talk to him. His incentive is to not make you out to have more problems than you do just to get you back so your parents pay him for the session again the next week." Perhaps it was a starkly cynical opinion of therapists but shooting a gun did more for Morgan's frame of mind than sharing her feelings did. "My intention is for you to talk to someone, if you wish to, who will actually care, actually listen and do something with what you say other than just talk at you, or even worse, down to you."

"And if I go to talk to Mr. Haller, I don't fail self-defense?" That would be...well, the first time that had happened since she'd gotten to the school. Karolina wasn't stupid, whatever anyone thought. And she really did hate what had happened to her GPA in the last few years. She sat up a little bit straighter, tried to read whatever was going on in her teacher's strange red eyes, "Why would you do that? You probably hate me more than anyone here."

Morgan quirked a curious eyebrow at the girl. "I don't hate you, Karolina. I may be guilty of allowing you to get the best of me and frustrate me a rather lot, which is admittedly more my failing than a fault of yours. Just because I don't know what to do with you half the time doesn't mean I hate you. I also don't wish for you to fail, in any sense of the word." Morgan's best kept secret seemed to be surfacing: she actually did care about the kids she taught, even the glow worm. "The reason I'd do it is simple, really. I think you could benefit from talking with him, so long as you did it willingly and not just as a means for getting to skip this class. I'd rather help you do something that may make being here more tolerable for you than not. If this will help then you can have the class period and get credit. I will never ask Haller what you've discussed with him, but I will however ask him to let me know that you are, indeed, talking to him and using the time with him constructively however the two of you see fit."

Of all the staff, Mr Haller was probably the most inoffensive person in the mansion. If anyone would actually talk to her and not judge, it would be him. She still wasn't sure that Morgan wasn't up to something--Karolina knew something about acting after all--but she didn't see how this could be turned against her.

Karolina bit her lip and nodded slowly, "Okay. I'll talk to to him. I'm not promising anything though. Just talking to him isn't going to change everyone else."

Some tension which had built up in Morgan's shoulders released when Karolina agreed. "I'm not asking for you to promise anything. You always have the option of bailing and going back to sitting in the corner of class with your book." How the fuck did you just pull that one off, Carlysle? Morgan was careful to keep the utter shock off her face. "Talking to him can't change everyone else, but you have to start somewhere, right? The only place to start is with the only person you can control, yourself. From talking to him you have the power to bring to light things that need to be changed, which he can then bring to the staff who can find ways to implement the changes needed. And hopefully he can help us find ways for you to be a bit less miserable while you're here." Mrogan gave the teenager a soft smile.

Karolina wasn't ready to smile back but she nodded, making the effort. Morgan was right. You had to be the change you wanted to see. And she wasn't doing a very good job at that. "So...should I go now or something?"

"You can go now if you'd like. Haller knows I was going to present the option to you so he won't be surprised if you turn up. Or you can go sit in the corner of class." After a moment Morgan added, "or just this once I'll let you off the hook. It'll give you some time while the mansion is as quiet as it ever gets and you can use the time however you want. Preferably you'll use it to think about your time with Haller and set out what your personal goals for meeting with him will be so that you have something to bring to him rather than turning up without knowing what to do with the time. The decision is up to you."

It had long been ingrained into Karolina that whatever else, you trusted your teachers. You didn't have to like them or agree with them or think they were worth a damn but teachers were trustworthy. And while she was perfectly aware that teachers were human, not demi-gods or avatars of learning, it was still a hard habit to shake. So Karolina didn't even consider the possibility that this was a trick to get her caught playing hooky, though if Morgan had been a fellow student that would have been her immediate response. "I'll think about it. I... thank you. I'm sure you'll like class better without me in it too."

Morgan smiled again when she was thanked and couldn't help the laugh in response to Karolina's last comment. "I don't know, I've gotten used to a bit of sullen in the corner. I might actually miss it." She walked to the front of the class to the teacher's desk and quickly scrawled a note. "I'm going to do something that is very likely incredibly stupid given recent events," she told the student as she wrote. "I'm going to trust you because I don't think you get anything from people you don't give first in this world. In order for you to act in a fashion that deserves trust we need to give you it. I'm going to put you on the honor system today. Violate it and you'll never have my trust for anything ever again. Don't violate it and there's a foundation to build from, no matter how much you may dislike me either as a teacher or as a person."

Morgan walked back to Karolina and laid the slip of paper on her desk. The note clearly excused Karolina from participating in class for a period of independent study. "I do want you to use the time constructively if you choose not to sit in class or go to Haller today. I don't care where you do it or what you do with it so long as it's constructive and it accomplishes something. " As an afterthought she added, "And you stay on campus. Deal?"

"Deal," Karolina picked up the paper, looking at the writing for a long, silent moment then tucked it carefully into her book. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

The metamorph nodded and gave Karolina what was for Morgan a much more genuine smile with only one side of her mouth curling up into the expression. "See you tomorrow, glow worm." She didn't bother to give Karolina a chance to glare at her for the nickname, just waved at her and turned to head out of the room to join the class she'd saddled Angelo with.

Karolina didn't glare, she just frowned at the blue woman's back while she packed up her stuff. Her tone hadn't sounded hostile or offensive, maybe just a little mocking, which Kare expected. But.... what the heck was a glow worm?