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xp_logsLate Tuesday night
Sam is sitting at his computer, legs pulled up to his chest, staring at
the screen with an unusually downcast look on his face.
A soft knock sounds on the door behind him, and Alison calls out his name
softly so as to not bother Kurt in the other room. "I know you're in
there..." she adds, after a moment.
He sighs, unfolding from his chair. He's only wearing a pair of boxers,
but it's just Al, so he goes to the door anyway. "Hey," he says, opening
it and leaning on the frame.
Alison freezes for a moment, bearing a look very much akin to that of a rabbit
frozen in headlights as she takes in his attire - or rather, lack
thereof. "I," she falters, then mentally slapping herself, regains her
composure. "I though I'd come over to see how you were doing. Saw the
comments," she adds, surprise changing to concern for him.
Sam smiles a little at her concern, and backs up to let her in. "No big
thing. I'm okay. Paige doesn't know." He flops down on the bed, hanging
off the edge and looking at Alison upside-down.
Cold shower. Soon, she promises herself, looking down at him and
remembering to close the door behind her before walking over to sit on
the floor next to the bed. She leans next to where his head is hanging,
gently tugging at a blond strand of hair. "I rather thought so," she
says, sighing in worry at his expression. "Will you be ok?"
He shrugs, an awkward motion since he's turned upside-down. "Yeah. I'm
fine, I guess." He doesn't really know what to say. He just wishes Paige
hadn't brought it up. He'd started to forget.
She shifts her weight slightly, almost cheek to cheek with him, staring off
in the distance. "Constant reminders hurt," she says, only all too aware
of the bitter irony of her words. "It makes it hard to think
straight..."
"It does. I'm sorry, I'm being all mopey..." Sam flips over, and starts
playing with her hair. He thinks it looks really soft, and just can't
help it. Maybe it's his downtrodden mood.
Shivers run up and down her spine and she closes her eyes involuntarily
at his actions, holding her breath for a very brief moment before
letting it out slowly - and thanking every deity in creation for having
had breathing lessons since she was seven. Think... Right! Think!
"Don't apologize for that Sunshine," she chides him gently, leaning into
his touch unconsciously. "You're about the least mopey person I know.
Everyone's allowed to feel down now and then."
Sam smiles, pressing his cheek against hers for a second before sitting
up on the bed. He curls his legs into Indian position, and looks out
his window at the grounds. "I guess so. I'm just not really used to it."
"It's usually something I try to avoid as well," she whispers, before
turning around to take a look at him. She gets up and sits on the edge
of the bed, reaching out to touch his bare shoulder briefly. As he turns
around, she tilts her head to the side slightly, arm still outstretched
towards him.
Sam half-smiles, his eyes still a little clouded with thoughts. He
pulls Alison closer to him on the bed, needing the contact and the
open affection. "Thanks, Al. I don't know what I'd do without you." He leans
his head on her shoulder, breath from his nose tickling at the side of
her neck.
He's hurting over Piotr. You're just a friend. Best friend. Don't you
dare let those hands move woman and oh... my... god... She wraps her
arms around him before just closing her eyes and holding him, fitting
her body around his and giving in to at least this much, knowing he
won't recognize things for what they truly are. "It'll be all right..."
she whispers to him, one hand stroking his back gently.
Sam takes a deep breath, comforted by Alison's proximity and sincere
hug. He leans back on the bed, lying down, and pulls Alison down with
him. "You give the best hugs, Al."
She reminds herself to keep breathing, wondering how he could not
possibly be aware of the effect of his actions and what he does to her,
and settles for just curling up close and leaning her head on his
shoulder. One hand curls up to rest at the hollow of his neck, and she
watches his chest rise and fall steadily. "I try," is all she can think
to say at this point, breathing slowly settling into an even rhythm.
"I was talking to Piotr earlier today..." Sam says, quietly, almost as
if he's talking to himself. "And I told him something I've never told
anyone before."
Sam pauses, considering, and draws a hand gently up and down Alison's
arm.
"I'm scared, sometimes."
"About what?" she whispers, unmoving, wondering whether this could be
possibly the worst or the best feeling in the world right now. To be so
close, and yet so very far at the same time.
"Well, it sounds stupid when I say it." He lets his eyes flutter closed,
then opens them slowly and turns them on Alison.
He feels her lips curve into a small smile against him, and she lets one
hand drift gently over his chest, to rest against his heart. "Tell me
anyway," she says, listening to his heart beat and looking up at him
serenely.
"I'm afraid of. People not liking me. Because I'm not used to it. It's
never happened to me before." He swallows, feeling stupid even though
Alison's presence makes him calm and peaceful.
"And I know it sounds real arrogant, but...it's true."
"Arrogant?" She rubs her cheek against him as she thinks of how to
answer. "No. Not arrogant. Almost everyone worries about people liking
them or not, Sammy." She pauses, still listening to his heartbeat,
before going on. "But I have to say it's amazing to me that people might
not have liked you 'before'. They lost out on something pretty
wonderful, if you ask me."
"Thanks, Alison...that means a lot." He smiles, the warmth of her body on
his making him sleepy. He considers whether to say the next words
weighing on the tip of his tongue.
"But..." he trails off, pressing his lips together in a tense line.
"Yes?" she asks, noting the tension but trying not to add to it by
tensing up herself. Radiating as much peacefulness as she can, wondering
why she is so calm right now, but not questioning it.
"Nothing." He sighs, pushing the thought from his mind, and cuddles up
closer. "Not important."
Not now, anyway. Maybe later...not like she could do anything about
it. Sam runs his fingers through Alison's hair, smiling tenderly at
her. "You look awful tired, Miss Alison..."
She sighs against him, letting out a deep sigh and she nods against him
sleepily - not pushing. He'll tell me when he can. "Been up since
five or so..." she mumbles, wrapped up in the sensation of being warm
and cared for, and not wanting to break that just yet.
"You can sleep here, if you like." Sam pulls the tacky western blanket
from the foot of the bed up over Alison. "I can go sleep out on the
couch."
Knowing better than to protest, and feeling far too drowsy and near
sleep to get up, she smiles at him and nods, curling up under the
blanket. "Have to be up at five t'morrow. Training..." she remembers to
mutter, letting her eyes drift shut as she speaks. "Thanks," she
murmurs, breathing steadily as sleep starts to take over.
He leans over her, brushing a light kiss on her cheekbone before he goes
over to the computer. He reads what Paige has just posted, and tiptoes
out of the room quietly so as not to disturb Alison as he leaves to set
thing right with his little sister.
~*~
Fw - *DIES* Lucy is just so evil. Wah!
Sam is sitting at his computer, legs pulled up to his chest, staring at
the screen with an unusually downcast look on his face.
A soft knock sounds on the door behind him, and Alison calls out his name
softly so as to not bother Kurt in the other room. "I know you're in
there..." she adds, after a moment.
He sighs, unfolding from his chair. He's only wearing a pair of boxers,
but it's just Al, so he goes to the door anyway. "Hey," he says, opening
it and leaning on the frame.
Alison freezes for a moment, bearing a look very much akin to that of a rabbit
frozen in headlights as she takes in his attire - or rather, lack
thereof. "I," she falters, then mentally slapping herself, regains her
composure. "I though I'd come over to see how you were doing. Saw the
comments," she adds, surprise changing to concern for him.
Sam smiles a little at her concern, and backs up to let her in. "No big
thing. I'm okay. Paige doesn't know." He flops down on the bed, hanging
off the edge and looking at Alison upside-down.
Cold shower. Soon, she promises herself, looking down at him and
remembering to close the door behind her before walking over to sit on
the floor next to the bed. She leans next to where his head is hanging,
gently tugging at a blond strand of hair. "I rather thought so," she
says, sighing in worry at his expression. "Will you be ok?"
He shrugs, an awkward motion since he's turned upside-down. "Yeah. I'm
fine, I guess." He doesn't really know what to say. He just wishes Paige
hadn't brought it up. He'd started to forget.
She shifts her weight slightly, almost cheek to cheek with him, staring off
in the distance. "Constant reminders hurt," she says, only all too aware
of the bitter irony of her words. "It makes it hard to think
straight..."
"It does. I'm sorry, I'm being all mopey..." Sam flips over, and starts
playing with her hair. He thinks it looks really soft, and just can't
help it. Maybe it's his downtrodden mood.
Shivers run up and down her spine and she closes her eyes involuntarily
at his actions, holding her breath for a very brief moment before
letting it out slowly - and thanking every deity in creation for having
had breathing lessons since she was seven. Think... Right! Think!
"Don't apologize for that Sunshine," she chides him gently, leaning into
his touch unconsciously. "You're about the least mopey person I know.
Everyone's allowed to feel down now and then."
Sam smiles, pressing his cheek against hers for a second before sitting
up on the bed. He curls his legs into Indian position, and looks out
his window at the grounds. "I guess so. I'm just not really used to it."
"It's usually something I try to avoid as well," she whispers, before
turning around to take a look at him. She gets up and sits on the edge
of the bed, reaching out to touch his bare shoulder briefly. As he turns
around, she tilts her head to the side slightly, arm still outstretched
towards him.
Sam half-smiles, his eyes still a little clouded with thoughts. He
pulls Alison closer to him on the bed, needing the contact and the
open affection. "Thanks, Al. I don't know what I'd do without you." He leans
his head on her shoulder, breath from his nose tickling at the side of
her neck.
He's hurting over Piotr. You're just a friend. Best friend. Don't you
dare let those hands move woman and oh... my... god... She wraps her
arms around him before just closing her eyes and holding him, fitting
her body around his and giving in to at least this much, knowing he
won't recognize things for what they truly are. "It'll be all right..."
she whispers to him, one hand stroking his back gently.
Sam takes a deep breath, comforted by Alison's proximity and sincere
hug. He leans back on the bed, lying down, and pulls Alison down with
him. "You give the best hugs, Al."
She reminds herself to keep breathing, wondering how he could not
possibly be aware of the effect of his actions and what he does to her,
and settles for just curling up close and leaning her head on his
shoulder. One hand curls up to rest at the hollow of his neck, and she
watches his chest rise and fall steadily. "I try," is all she can think
to say at this point, breathing slowly settling into an even rhythm.
"I was talking to Piotr earlier today..." Sam says, quietly, almost as
if he's talking to himself. "And I told him something I've never told
anyone before."
Sam pauses, considering, and draws a hand gently up and down Alison's
arm.
"I'm scared, sometimes."
"About what?" she whispers, unmoving, wondering whether this could be
possibly the worst or the best feeling in the world right now. To be so
close, and yet so very far at the same time.
"Well, it sounds stupid when I say it." He lets his eyes flutter closed,
then opens them slowly and turns them on Alison.
He feels her lips curve into a small smile against him, and she lets one
hand drift gently over his chest, to rest against his heart. "Tell me
anyway," she says, listening to his heart beat and looking up at him
serenely.
"I'm afraid of. People not liking me. Because I'm not used to it. It's
never happened to me before." He swallows, feeling stupid even though
Alison's presence makes him calm and peaceful.
"And I know it sounds real arrogant, but...it's true."
"Arrogant?" She rubs her cheek against him as she thinks of how to
answer. "No. Not arrogant. Almost everyone worries about people liking
them or not, Sammy." She pauses, still listening to his heartbeat,
before going on. "But I have to say it's amazing to me that people might
not have liked you 'before'. They lost out on something pretty
wonderful, if you ask me."
"Thanks, Alison...that means a lot." He smiles, the warmth of her body on
his making him sleepy. He considers whether to say the next words
weighing on the tip of his tongue.
"But..." he trails off, pressing his lips together in a tense line.
"Yes?" she asks, noting the tension but trying not to add to it by
tensing up herself. Radiating as much peacefulness as she can, wondering
why she is so calm right now, but not questioning it.
"Nothing." He sighs, pushing the thought from his mind, and cuddles up
closer. "Not important."
Not now, anyway. Maybe later...not like she could do anything about
it. Sam runs his fingers through Alison's hair, smiling tenderly at
her. "You look awful tired, Miss Alison..."
She sighs against him, letting out a deep sigh and she nods against him
sleepily - not pushing. He'll tell me when he can. "Been up since
five or so..." she mumbles, wrapped up in the sensation of being warm
and cared for, and not wanting to break that just yet.
"You can sleep here, if you like." Sam pulls the tacky western blanket
from the foot of the bed up over Alison. "I can go sleep out on the
couch."
Knowing better than to protest, and feeling far too drowsy and near
sleep to get up, she smiles at him and nods, curling up under the
blanket. "Have to be up at five t'morrow. Training..." she remembers to
mutter, letting her eyes drift shut as she speaks. "Thanks," she
murmurs, breathing steadily as sleep starts to take over.
He leans over her, brushing a light kiss on her cheekbone before he goes
over to the computer. He reads what Paige has just posted, and tiptoes
out of the room quietly so as not to disturb Alison as he leaves to set
thing right with his little sister.
~*~
Fw - *DIES* Lucy is just so evil. Wah!
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