Jennie and Jake, and later Wanda

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Jennie ropes Jake into helping her by bribing him with (gasp!) baked goods. Backdated because of player moronitude.



Most people were generally annoyed when someone knocked "shave and a haircut" on the door in lieu of knocking on the door like a normal person. But it was generally accepted that a) Jennie was not normal and b) she loved to annoy people. Besides, once the person on the other side of the door heard the terms of the mission, she was pretty sure any and all annoyance at the method of knocking would quickly be forgotten.

"Two bits?" Jake asked as he opened the door; when he saw who was standing there, a vague look of horror crossed his face. "You don't have any markers, do you?" he asked suspiciously.

"Nope, not this time!" Jennie said cheerfully. "No, I bear only the tidings of my gentle mistress and have come to beseech you for your help on a most urgent of missions. My gentle mistress has dispatched me on a mission of great importance. Sadly such mission involves the retrieval of heavy packages. While I am a strong, independent young woman, alas I only have but two arms. My gentle mistress suggested you would be most helpful to me in this regard." Off Jake's look, she grinned and added. "Wanda also said to say that there will be cake."

He rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, even though he couldn't help but grin. "One of these days I'm going to have to stop being so easily bribed. Fine; let me put my shoes on. Although I feel it only fair to point out that technically speaking, I've only got one arm." He let her in to his cluttered apartment, papers and files spread throughout the living room. "Sorry about the mess. I've been trying to get some work done."

"Like I have ever been one to let a mere technicality stop me," Jennie said as she followed him into the room. Jennie felt the familiar twinge of anxiety at all of the clutter in Jake's apartment, but it was quickly ignored. "And no worries, what seems like mess to me might be a cleverly concealed system of organization known only to you. I promise our errand shall be quick, and the reward substantial. There's a French bakery near our destination that produces some of the best macarons I've had outside of Paris."

"That's it. Clever organization. Yes." He grinned up through his bangs as he slipped his shoes on. "Now, these packages don't contain portals to another dimension, or disgustingly smelly potions, or the bones of our enemies, do they? I've seen what sorts of things Wanda likes to keep around in her apartment."

"Honestly, I don't know. And I know not to ask OR look in the packages. Quickest way to a violent squishy death, or eyeball bursting in my opinion." Jennie said primly. "Allons-y, my dear Jake. The pastry awaits..."

=====

"You're right," Jake said, although it came out near-unintelligible through his mouthful of macaron. "This is really, really good." He'd managed to hold back his moan of pleasure, but just barely.

"Auntie Jennie knows things," the girl said with a nod. "I reward myself with these whenever journal shenanigans get out of hand. Some days I hope someone will start something just so I have the excuse."

"Careful," he warned, reaching for another macaron. "The way things work around here, you'll end up eating here every day and then they won't be special anymore. Or so I'm told." He shrugged. "Baked goods have yet to lose their appeal to me."

"If it did, I'd be a million pounds by now. Maybe people will quit making tits-in-a-uniform jokes then. Hey, there's a thought," Jennie pretended to rub her chin. Then she sipped her tea and shook her head. "I'll admit I don't know half of what went on, I haven't been paying attention. I've already been cast in a show for this fall so I will begin the never-ending cycle of rehearsal and broken toes, and spending my birthday high on painkillers because some idiot decided to take over the world again."

"Someone's taking over the world again? Damn. I knew I should have scheduled a vacation." Jake was pretty sure he was only going to be allowed to dodge the topic of conversation for so long, but at least there were tasty pastries. "What show? And what part?"

"Honestly, I've spent three of the four past birthdays somehow incapacitated. We've decided there's something of a curse on my birthday, which also happens to be Halloween. Having seen the things I've seen, I'm not going to rule it out. Therefore, make other plans come October 31st." Jennie flicked her bangs out of her head and bit into another macaron, rolling her eyes in pleasure. She finished chewing and then continued, "It's an avant garde piece choreographed by the head of our department. I tend to not be the most dedicated of his students, what with having to save the world and all, so somehow I wound up in two pairs peices and a group ensemble, but no solos. Sadness."

"I hear Bora Bora's lovely that time of the year. I'll have to check it out." He snagged another from their dwindling pile of pastries, raising one eyebrow. "Avant garde dance? Please tell me it's improved since the days of black bodysuits and bad haircuts."

"I go to Art School. My first big show it was little pieces of silver spandex and a metric ton of silver bodypaint. I'm a little afraid of our costume department," Jennie said, shuddering in mock horror. The girl was well versed in talk avoidance. If Jake didn't want to discuss anything then she could be depended upon for fluffy entertainment.

Jake gazed at her mournfully over the edge of his treat. "I'm sincerely sorry," he deadpanned, then ruined the effect by making an audible "NOM" as he took a bite. "So does Wanda often make you carry heavy boxes around, or is this more of a one-time thing?"

Jennie giggled. "On occasion, usually with a handsome reward waiting for me at the other end. I'm trustworthy, dependable, and somehow prone to hitting all the green lights during rush hour. Has she shown you the joys of the meat-on-a-stick place yet?"

"No, she hasn't!" Jake said indignantly. "That hussy. I can't believe she's held out on me this long." He took in their decimated pastry supply. "Meat-on-a-stick for dessert, you think?"

"But of course!" Jennie said with a horrible French accent. "Shall I call my gentle mistress and have her meet us there? Thus we ensure the delivery of her packages, and she pays for dinner."


Jake grinned. "I like this plan. It gets Wanda out of her apartment and into our charming company, and it gets us free food. You're smart," he said happily.

"Incredibly so," Jennie said with a grin. "Trust in the Jennie, she knows these things," the girl tapped her forehead and gestured to the last pastry in the box. "Have at it, my fine companion. You and your technical one arm have earned a suitable reward."

=====

Our heroes decide that Wanda needs to be saved from herself. Meat on a stick ensues.



"Yes, I am fully aware of what time it is here, Stephen," Wanda responded, carefully making her way to the door where someone - or someones - had decided to start up what sounded like a drum beat on her door. "And may I remind you how late it is where you are? And yet you sound surprised when you find me going through the files you sent me."

She yanked open the door and stepped back, watching silently as Jake suddenly pitched through. "Stephen? I might have to call you back - I smell an intervention in the air." Wanda waved to Jennie and held up a finger. "Agatha? If she even gives you the hint of trouble, sic Victor on her. He'll be a speed bump but at least you will have some breathing space. Do not allow her to side track you." Stepping back, she gave everyone room to come in or get off the floor as she went to end the call.

Jake rolled over onto his back from where he'd landed and gave her a dazed grin. "Meat on a stick!" he chanted, filing away the information that she was still wrapped up in this whole creepy museum thing for later. "And also, I totally hate you."

Jennie deposited Wanda's packages by the door, "My errand has been fulfilled, oh my most noble, gentle mistress. Your good sir has performed most admirably, and as such I feel a handsome reward is in order. In fact," Jennie cupped her ear, "I believe I heard the sugared grilled pineapple calling my name..."

"Must go, Stephen, surrounded by insane people who are demanding flesh on pointy things." Wanda blinked at what she said and what her job sometime entailed. "Please note that I don't mean I'm surrounded by cannibals." At the laughter on the other end, she shook her head and turned off the phone.

"All right, darlings, I have a feeling if I fight this there just might be a coup. Give me time to find my shoes and my purse and then I'll let you drag me out of this dreary hole and into the world." Sadly, she really was not kidding - she'd thrown herself so much into work when she'd gotten back that she hadn't seen much of the outside except traveling to and from the office.

One utterly ridiculous shoe sailed over her head, the other followed once Jake managed to extricate it from where it and its twin had been living underneath the couch. "There. Get your purse and let's go, woman. Meat on a stick waits for no man! ...Woman. Whatever."

"Allons-y madame y monsieur," Jennie gestured to the door. Between the two of them, Jake and Jennie were able to have Wanda down the stairs and out onto the street in record time. Jennie clapped her hands and giggled as they waited for the light to change. "Yay, meat on a stick, going to where it belongs, in my belleh," she sing-songed. "The universe has called to us. I believe we've all had crap weeks, me with the dancing, Wanda with the museum thingy, and Jakey with the Cammie thingy. I hope you got 'Yana to give you that drawing by the way. I swear, those things are going to be worth something someday."

Wanda shook her head in an effort to clear it. "I appear to be behind the times," she commented, eyeballing both of them in turn. "Wait, Illyana drew -" She held up her hands. "You know, I believe I should eat something first and then perhaps I can try and make sense of you two. I have a feeling drinks are going to be needed tonight. I must be psychic, I restocked the other day." She glared down at her feet for a moment. The shoes, at least, matched but they were stilletos and not exactly the shoes she would have picked to go out and get meat on a stick.

"I hate you," she said to Jake.

"I know you do," he smirked, then turned to Jennie. "It's on my fridge. Once we get Wanda fortified with alcohol and food--" he raised an eyebrow at his roommate, "how long has it been since you've eaten, anyway?--we'll have to show it to her. But not until she's drunk."

"There was a handful of what I believed to be peanuts around eleven this morning," she responded. "Granted, I am still trying to figure out if they were nuts or packing supplies..."

"Fooooood," Jennie took Wanda's arm in hers and practically dragged her across the street when the light changed. Jennie must have been hungry, since luckily they were seated in the restaurant not five minutes later.

"So, how's the world of the weird?" Jake asked flippantly. "I can only assume it's been interesting and exciting, since you haven't surfaced for air in," he checked his watch, "several days now."

She didn't look at him for a moment since she was too busy indicating that she really did want that much meat from that particular stick. As the pile of meat slowly started to grow, Wanda finally answered. "Well, the damned thing's still there," she said, sounding about as tired as she felt. "Between dealing with Agatha, Stephen, and time differences on top of the rest of it, I simply want to burn the entire thing to the ground and call it a day."

Jake shrugged. "We can do that, you know. In, out, no one the wiser." He speared a piece of meat from her plate just to be contrary, and ate it straight off the fork--something about a restaurant where you were served from a communal skewer invited a lack of propriety. "Then maybe we might see you from time to time."

"Okay, okay, wait. I'm missing something. Y'all need to spill here. No more talking over Jennie's head," Jennie wagged an accusing fork at her mentor.

"Only if you both spill on your own," Wanda suggested before launching into the parts of the museum escapade that Jennie was still in the dark on. She didn't gloss over anything but simply skimmed on some of the more emotional aspects - not that she was fooled at all that Jennie wouldn't be able to see through it. It was more that she didn't want to go into great detail on that particular part in the restaurant. "...and so now I have been working with Stephen Strange to catalog and figure out what is in that blasted museum. To the detriment of everything and, everyone, else I must admit."

She glanced over at Jake, trying to gauge how much of that earlier talk was glib and if he had actually been ... well, put out by her barricading herself.

"We just worry that we won't know if something in your apartment manages to rise up and eat you. It could happen!" he protested at the raised eyebrow that earned him. "I've seen the sorts of things you live with."

"And you," Jennie said, swinging the conversation back around. She pointed at Jake. "What was the deal with Cammie?"

Thank god for alcohol and waiters with good timing. Jake snagged his beer before the waiter had a chance to set it down on the table and took a drink, trying to decide how best to answer the question. It would've been one thing if Jennie hadn't been there, or even if they hadn't been in public...He shrugged. "She got mad at me over something and popped me in the nose. Apparently I have that effect on women." He smirked at Wanda. "Anyway, it's a fairly long, boring, stupid story and I'm far too sober to attempt it. What kind is that?" he asked, reaching over to spear another piece from Wanda's plate.

The look she gave him was both scathing and apologetic at the same time - she'd sheepishly talked with Sofia on the matter and they had mutually come to the 'dunderhead' conclusion from her actions. "What on earth did you do?" she asked quietly.

He squirmed, hiding behind his beer, utterly unable to make eye contact. "Nothing. I mean, nothing to Cammie. She was mad because Jean-Paul was mad. Is...Nevermind." He tried to steal more meat from her in a vain attempt at distraction.

Jennie rolled her eyes. "I know she's so supposed to be all badass and all, but girlfriend's trying too hard. You didn't see me starting shit all over the place because I could when I first got to the mansion. I was happy to have a freaking bed." In all honesty Jennie found Cammie's attitude rather cute, when it wasn't annoying. "Anyway, that is neither here nor there. I feel like I should have something to report and then quickly dodge, but alas, I have nothing more than life's usual follies."

"Don't think you're getting out of it so fast - I think I heard you mention something about dance earlier? How is that going?"

"I'm in a department production, no big," Jennie shrugged. "It's not like I have a solo or anything, the head of our department hates my guts because 'I'm not dedicated enough to the art of dance' or some crap like that. Unfortunately I took a spill off a fucking bridge last year and I have to go and save the world on occasion, so I had to prioritize," Jennie sighed.


"That's what you get for being a superhero," Jake said puckishly as he waggled his meat-laden fork at her.

"Yes, but my ass looks great in leather," Jennie deadpanned.


"Well, there's a glowing endorsement for doing your job," Wanda said with a grin.