xp_logs | [Doug, Marie] I will persevere in my course of loyalty (Reply)

Doug offers to go for a ride with Marie when she seems tense and frustrated. It's the first time they've really been in the same room, much less the same car, since the potion incident. They head to the mall and Doug's nervous about the trip but manages to hang in there. Set Wednesday afternoon.

It wasn't until she was standing by the little blue car, hugging herself against the chill of the garage, that Marie realized the full impact of what was at hand. She and Doug hadn't talked alone since the whole horribleness about the potion and now, here they were going for a drive, off the cuff, and she had no idea what to expect. Things were just a little overwhelming. Selene, that whole evening, what had gone on between herself and Logan after she'd got home, and then adjusting to S living with her and suddenly having Alison seeking haven on the couch... things did kind of add up. She bit her lip and resolved, futilely, not to cry about any of it. The door from the house creaked open and she met Doug's eyes across the room.

Doug could read the intensity of all of Marie's conflicting emotions all the way across the room. His expression softened. Why had he been so stubborn and scared? Why had he waited so long to make a peace offering? He shook his head. That wasn't important right now. What was was that Em needed him. And he was there for her. He smiled gently as he got closer. "Hey." One word with a mountain of subtext.

Marie's eyes were already threatening to fill with tears as Doug came toward her. "Hi." He was so sweet-faced, his eyes were so gentle and sympathetic that she knew he was reading her easily. And he was smiling like everything was okay between them. -He's not mad at me- "I missed you..." It was all she managed to say before the tears spilled over and she pressed one hand to her mouth as though she could stifled the sadness that way.

"Oh, Em..." Doug held his arms open as a few tears slipped from his own eyes. "I missed you too. C'mere."

Marie fell into his arms, burying her face in his shoulder. "Oh, god, I was afraid you wouldn't want to see me again."

"Shhh...it's okay, Em," Doug murmured as he stroked her back gently. "I...thought it might have been the other way 'round..." he whispered softly as tears continued to drip down his face.

"It... It would have been if it had been your fault. But it wasn't." She clung to him. "Oh, god, Doug, I missed my friend. And I was so scared for you, scared of losing you. And I am so, so sorry for both of us, for everything. I was so scared. I've never been so scared. I just wanted to see you and hear you say it wasn't you so it would be okay."

Doug nodded slowly and stroked Marie's hair with a pair of gloves that he had grabbed as he put on one of his long turtlenecks before leaving, having a hunch that something like this might happen. "Right afterwards...I don't know if I could have told you. Because even though I hadn't done it, I still felt responsible in a way. And that I'd taken advantage of you when I finally figured out what was happening." His expression turned sad and wistful.

"It's okay." She stepped back enough to look him in the eye, managing to smile a little through her tears. "I know. I still... I still need to know sometimes. It still scares me so much."

Doug nodded. "It scared me a bit, too. Mostly the thought of what everyone was going to do to me once it wore off." He looked pensive for a moment, weighing whether or not to tell her. "Mr. Summers...I think he might have an idea about who was behind it." He fidgeted nervously.

Marie nodded. "As long as someone does, as long as they're looking for who it was... I think it's best if I stay out of that whole part and work on healing." She reached out and took Doug's face in her thin-gloved hands to look at him. "I... I just want us to be friends again, Doug."

Doug brushed a tear away from the corner of Marie's eye with his own gloved finger. "Me too, Em. I want us to be okay again. I've missed you so very much."
\

"Really?" Marie shook her head. "Sounds like you've had a lot of attention lately. It's about time you got it, too." She leaned in and brushed a kiss on Doug's cheek. "Want to fill me in on things while you drive?"

Doug blushed slightly at the brush of Marie's lips on his cheek. "Sure." He hit the keyless entry and hopped into the driver's seat, leaning across to open Marie's door before she could get all the way around. "Seat belt," he informed her, not starting the car until she had. He smoothly pulled out and drove for the gate at a sedate pace, tossing a mental coin and turning left out of the driveway.

"Always the seatbelt," Marie said with a little laugh. "So, what's been going on with you?" She snuggled down into her seat, turned to face him, and leaned her head on her headrest. She looked tired, more than usual, but the tears were fading.

Doug chuckled wryly. "Where to start. It's been quite an interesting couple weeks. For values of 'interesting' occasionally equal to 'almost too much to bear', 'stressful beyond belief', and 'very worrisome'."

"Sounds like mine, then," Marie said dryly. "I can hardly keep days and nights straight anymore."

"The first couple days after Mr. Summers brought me back were...hard. Really hard," Doug said, looking sad in remembrance.

"I'm so sorry," Marie said quietly. "I knew it would be for you. Look... one of these days, and this is purely selfish... it would mean a lot to me if maybe we could do something about things between you and Logan. No time soon. Whenever you're ready. I don't know /what/ but... " She sighed. "He's being... himself... about this. I can't cast judgement on him for it. But it would make life better for me if he'd sort things with you. If that's not a possibility, just let me know and I'll let it drop."

Doug nodded. "From the way Alison wasn't telling me things, I gather there was a bit of an argument among the staff about when he showed up in my room right afterwards. I...to be fair, I wasn't in the best state, and I did try to bait him a bit. I was looking to be punished, to be hated as much as I hated myself right then. But...I don't think he helped much, because as soon as he came in, it was like a reminder of everything that had gone wrong, thrown right back in my face. And it hurt."

Marie nods sadly. "He just... he was the one taking care of me then, you know, picking up my pieces? I think he was right that you should have stayed clear then, and he didn't know you would, and I'm sure he wasn't gracious about it. He was pretty rattled by it all himself. I discussed it with him afterward. Of course, because nothing's ever fucking easy around here, there was some miscommunication that led to Mr Marko informing the other staff that Logan had tried to, or at least threatened to, kill you."

Doug nodded slowly. "I don't think Mr. Marko's ever quite so happy as when he's stirring something up with somebody. I...I'm willing to try if he is. Because I know it's important to you. I know _he's_ important to you. It's just..." He trailed off.

"Just what," Marie prompted gently.

Doug quieted. "When you and Angelo came back, I wanted to help. But it...didn't seem like my place. So I went to get Logan for you. And he said something that really hurt. 'Besides, what the fuck could _you_ do to help?'" He imitated Logan's growling tones. A few tears threatened to slide down his face again and he dashed at them with one hand. "I _tried_, Em, I tried to do what you needed right then, but he couldn't see that." He sighed raggedly.

Marie sighed and leaned back in her seat. "He's not necessarily a nice person, Doug. And you... I left him for you, potion or not. And that..." She shook her head. "That is not going to go away for a long time for him. Yeah. That was an unfair thing to say though god knows he's been in the position to say it to himself enough in the past. You did right, you did what I needed, and it was the best thing. I'm grateful for it." She reached out to cover Doug's near hand with her own.

Doug's hand quivered slightly with emotion, and he clung greedily to hers after a moment. Assessing his emotional state, he decided the better part of valor was to pull off the road so he could piece himself back together before continuing.

Marie pulled kleenex from her pocket with her free hand and held tightly to Doug with the other. "You've never let me down," she said softly.

Doug rested his head on Marie's shoulder and cried softly. "I feel like I did that day, though, Em. I don't understand how you and Angie and everyone still trust me and care so much about me."

Marie ran her fingers through his hair, soothing. "Because you're a good person, Doug. You're worth it."

Doug leaned hungrily into the contact and sighed tiredly. "Sorry to fall apart on you."

"It's been a hard time for all of us," Marie said gently. "Seems you've had some good friends to get you through it, though."

Doug smiled sadly. "I didn't have my best one, though."

Marie's eyes filled with tears again. "Oh, Doug... honey." She leaned over and kissed his hair. "I never went anywhere. I was always waiting."

"I know. I was just scared to reach out to you." Doug hugged Marie tightly. "But I'm glad I finally did."

"Me too." Marie let out a slow sigh of relief. "I think we're getting fixed now, though, right?"

Doug nodded hesitantly. "I hope so." He leaned back into his seat and smiled over at Marie. "Better late than never, right?"

"Oh..." Marie shook her head. "Always. Even if it were the last possible moment." She reached out and took his hand in hers. "All's forgiven, okay?"

"There isn't anything for me to forgive you for, silly. You've been so patient and caring. I've been the stubborn one." Doug shrugged. "But if you can forgive me, I can give forgiving myself a try." He grinned wryly.

"That's the idea," Marie said firmly. "You up for driving? I need to pick something up in town, actually."

"I think I'm up for Driving Miss Marie now." Doug put the car into gear and pulled out. "Where we headed, and what are we going to pick up?"

"Jewelry store," Marie said. "Over at the mall by the west entrance. You okay with that?"

"The..." Doug tensed up slightly at the mention of the mall. "Yeah." He cleared his throat and tried it again more convincingly. "Yeah. What're we picking up?"

"A necklace," Marie said lightly. "For me. I dropped it off there to get it fixed up."

Doug nodded. "Okay. West entrance. Jewelry store." ~I can do this...~ he thought to himself.

"You'll be fine." Marie put her hand on his arm, rubbing gently. "Nothing's going to happen."

Doug forced himself to unclench his hands from the wheel, where the knuckles were starting to whiten. "I hope so. It's just...that guy, with Angelo when you went out to dinner...I don't want you to have to have _me_ in your head from me freaking out." He shook his head, knowing he was being irrational, but still scared.

"Doug, you can't hurt me like Skin did." Her voice is firm and calm. "And I will protect you, I promise. I will take care of us both and nothing bad will happen. You have a right not to be afraid here. Trust me."

"I do trust you, Em." Doug nodded jerkily. "I can do this."

"I won't let you down," she said solemnly. "I didn't fail Yana, I didn't fail Angelo, I didn't fail John. No one hurts what matters to me, not while I'm still breathing."

Doug reached over to clasp Marie's hand. "I'm glad I matter to you. And I'm so grateful for having you in my life." He smiled.

"I don't give up on people," Marie told him. "Think we can do this thing? Can't be worse than breaking into a testing facility and prison in the middle east, right?" She winked at him and smiled impishly.

"I think we can handle it. 'Long as you can handle a minor bit of the shakes if I get too freaked out. But I'll try to relax." Doug chuckled.

"I think I can do that. Let's go."