Log: Remy & Jubilee

[x-jubilee.livejournal.com]

Backdated to the 17th June 2012.

Jubilee stops by to visit Remy in the office, looking for a little conversation. As always, it's a learning experience.



Jubilee slipped into her usual seat in Remy's office and waited for him to get off the phone, having set down the normal paper work for the week beforehand. Normally she'd simply leave at that point, but she hadn't talked since they'd gotten back and while she was sure Ororo was more then capable of keeping her boss healthy in both mind and body, that didn't mean she didn't want to hear it from the man himself.

"Iggy, Remy use small words dis time. No more deals wit' Sublime, or our business is through. You understand dat? Finally." Remy hung up. "De biggest problem wit' international weapons dealers is dat you forget dat dey will sell weapons to you enemies given de chance."

"I suppose it's better then countries selling weapons to your enemies," Jubilee mused idly. "You getting back into the swing of things then? No sudden urges to skip off to a desert island with your wife and leave the reins to your minions?"

"'ro would got bored too fast." He picked up another file, marked 'urgent'. It was the more common tag on his desk, as they struggled to undo the damage that several weeks of inactivity had done to their network. "You?"

"Dude, I spent some time in the country teaching civilians how not to die for long enough to do some good, and like, not talking. Not exactly tough stuff compared to being tortured by lunatics," Jubilee replied with a shrug, eyes shifting away from her boss as she spoke. "I'm just glad we all got outta there."

"Remy rather amazed dat we didn't lose anyone in dat final fight." He said, carefully skirting the issue of Rachel. He and Ororo had made a brief flight over to Muir to speak to Nate and Moira, but there wasn't much beyond platitude. Moira especially looked broken by the loss; all the fire and fight drained from her. "Sometimes you have to accept dat you got lucky and move on."

"You really believe that?" Jubilee asked.

She couldn't say she felt especially lucky, even if she was alive. Still, she did realize things could have gone so very much worse at any number of stages. Mostly that just made her want to over-analyze to the point of crazy, but she'd restrained the urge so far.

"You can go looking for greater meaning, but you won't find it, Jubilee." Remy leaned forward, and crossed his hands on his desk. "Not to belabour de point, but luck is a big part of de difference between a successful operation and an unmarked grave. Dere's a thousand things dat you can do to tilt de odds in your favourite, but at de end of de day, sometimes things go wrong despite every precaution you can devise. On de other hand, sometimes you can pull everyone out of a situation dat should involve a lot of bodybags. If you need to think dat fate, or God, or something else is beyond it, dat's you choice. Dat's not a comfort I can believe in."

She'd had a lot of time to think in Genosha, being unable to talk had meant listening a lot more then she was used to. She hadn't realised how much she craved the ability to talk to someone about those thoughts. Who else if not the man who seemed to have slotted into the role of mentor for her? Even if she was never sure if that was by choice or simply because she desperately needed him to be that person for her.

"I think it matters, what we believe in," she replied after a moments pause. "Not like, there's a big 'ol bearded angry dude in the sky kinda believing, although I suppose that's fine if it's where your mind goes. I don't know if luck is what I'd call it, even knowin' someone like Wanda. See, I had like this thing in Genosha, you know? Like, these people trusted me to tell them how to make the right choices, to know how best to move in a fight and it got me thinkin' that that's what it's all about. It's choices, and how we make them. I figure I wouldn't be here if I didn't think following you was the right choice, and so I believe you're gonna use me in the right ways, even if I can't see why you're doing something. Don't know if that's foolish, but it's the choice I made, it's like, what I believe."

"You're mistaking belief for trust, Jubilee. It's what happens when you start to add experience to your skills." He tried to clarify a lesson that he had learned long ago. "So what dat all means is dat you start to understand what are de right decisions to make, and how de right way is to go 'bout dose decisions. But once you make dat decision, it is out of you hands. I won't ever put you in a spot for de wrong reasons, but dat doesn't mean dat I won't ever put you in de wrong spot."

"I think I get what you're saying.," Jubilee replied, but was silent for a moment while she processed. "It's like, the cold equations, isn't it? The choices this job sometimes gives us. I was totally talking to Korvus about it in Genosha, trying to explain why justice isn't enough of a reason to do something."

"It is, which is why Remy doesn't like to use words like fate or right in what we do. When you start to believe dat dere's a pre-ordined reason behind you decisions, you start making dem for de wrong reasons. What we do is ugly because it should be ugly. It should never be comfortable. Dat way, we always question whether or not what we need to do is necessary right up until de point dat we decide one way or another. And we take responsibility for it."

"You ever regretted a choice?" Jubilee asked, merely curious as she relaxed back into her chair. "Not as Gambit, yeah? But as Remy."

"Plenty. It's part of de job." He said, elbows resting easily on the desk. "You don't think dat dere aren't a dozen decisions dat wouldn't have changed knowing what I know now, just wit' dis place alone? You know dat I would. But, Remy can't see de future, so I can only make my choices based on what I know."

"Considering the migraines Marie-Ange gets, I don't think I'd want precognition even if it did help me avoid that kinda shit," Jubilee noted, poking at one of the urgent files on Remy's desk. "So, anything I can help with here, help unbury you from the growing pile a bit?"

"Don't touch the files." Remy said automatically. Jubilee had once come in to 'help get organized' while Remy was away, and it had taken him a week and a trip to Ubzerkistan to get things straightened out again. "Do you job. Dis is de great wisdom I have for you, petite. Regardless of what happens, de job always goes on, always keeps turning. It's not a goal but a process and de way to do good is to keep doing what we doing. By de way-"

Remy paused, but finally went on. "While I detest relationship advice, Remy figure dat dis is important, because I actually like 'manda's brother. You make sure dat he knows what you do and are willing to do on de job, neh? Kurt tries to keep his faith whole, and Remy respect dat. Just make sure dat jumping into something post-trauma isn't going to end up making it worse when he suddenly realizes dat you spent de previous weekend in Symkeria assassinating a target."

"Don't worry, Gumbo. I'm being extra careful this time around. No moving forward without some very long talks about expectations and realities, I promise," Jubilee replied, leaving the files alone. One day she figured she'd know enough to be where he was, but today was not that day, and she was fine with that. "Am I going to be in Symkeria assassinating someone any time soon?"

"De week is still young." Remy said dryly, as he picked up a stack of files and passed them over. "Cammie should have you tickets and identification. Check in day by day. Think dat we stay at high alert for the next few weeks just until we know everything is calmed down. Enjoy Macau."

"You always say that, I don't think that word means what you think it means," Jubilee noted, but with a cheeky grin as she took the stack of files from Remy. She gave him a short salute as she stood and headed toward the door. "See you on the flip side, Boss."

"Jubilee. Don't get confident. I need you scared right now."

"I'm always scared," Jubilee replied, giving him a wry smile as she paused in opening the door. "I just hide it really damn well."

"Don't. I prefer you scared. It means you've been listening."

"Got it," Jubilee replied, fingers gripped against the handle of the door as she dropped the mask she'd been wearing, letting her true state of exhaustion and caffeine powered nervous energy show through. "You really prefer this look on me?"

"I prefer when you don't ask." Remy said. "We wear too many masks in dis job to try and use dem wit' each other. I'd rather see when you not able to handle things den identify you body later."

"Okay," Jubilee replied, taking a breath before pulling open the door fully and stepping outside. "I'll see you when I get back, Remy."