[Marie, Logan, family] Passing through, passing through...

[x-rogue.livejournal.com]

Monday, late afternoon, Marie is cleaning out her room and her cousins come to visit.


Marie sat on the floor of her room, sorting through school papers and stuffing most of them in a trash bag. She was tucking the rest into hanging folders in a portable file case that Logan had bought while she was out visiting her Nona. Logan was sitting in the chair at her desk, turned to face her, alternately reading and watching her work. The room had changed already, the posters were down from the walls and her photos and postcards were packed away in another box to go home. She held up an essay, laughing, and pointed at the course name. European Literature, it read.

"I told you I remembered the course. There's a reason. The comments are funny," she said. "Here." She handed it to Logan to read.

"A concise paper, Ms D'Ancato." Logan read it aloud. "But, I am sure, a last minute effort. Your habit of relying on your wit rather than preparation is dismaying, as preparation and care would make your performance exceptional instead of adequate. As such, in an attempt to spur you toward self-discipline, I am only awarding you a 'B+' on this paper. Further uninspired performances may cause me to have to lecture you in person."

Marie shook her head, still laughing. "That was Mr Hunter. He was always trying to get me to actually study and apply myself. You can see why I remember the material, he was hilarious. I wonder if he's still around."

"Next time we come, y'c'n find out," Logan said, handing her back the essay. Marie put it in the box that was going back to Westchester and looked up at him then, her laughter fading.

"I never really thought of coming back. I mean. I didn't think of not coming back or... I didn't exactly plan any of this, did I?"

Logan gave her a half-smile. "Relyin' on y'r wit rather th'n preparation again?" he asked, and winked at her.

"Logan!" Marie reached behind her for a throw-pillow on the bed and did just that with it, aiming for Logan's head. He caught it easily in mid-air and laughed at her.

"Hey, I thought y'd be glad t'know y'didn't change completely." He held up his hands in mock-surrender. "I was just pointin' it out."

"You..." Marie glared at him. "You are a bad man."

"Y're just figurin' that out now?" Logan tossed the pillow back onto the bed and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back in the chair and smiling at her.

"Marie!" Sharon's voice from downstairs startled them both. "Your cousins are here to see you." There were young, female voices from downstairs and the sound of feet on the stairs.

Marie gave Logan, who was already getting to his feet with his book in his hand, an amused look. "Oh, come on, Logan," she teased. "Don't you want to stay?"

"No," he said emphatically. He bent to give her a quick kiss on the forehead. "Just goin' outside." He was out the door, then and Marie could hear him give a gruff greeting to the chattering girls in the hall as he passed. She got to her feet as her cousins invaded her room.

"Marie!" Donnalisa was almost Marie's age, the daughter of one of Daddy's older sisters, a taller girl with short black hair and green eyes. She threw her arms around Marie the second she was in the room, squealing with delight. Marie laughed and winced, hugging her back.

"Hey, Donli." Marie hadn't realized how much she'd missed her cousins until now and she found herself suddenly tearful.

"Don't you ever do that again, Marie Hope D'Ancato," Donnalisa gave her a shake. "Oh for the love of... don't cry, Marie. You'll get Sibby going and Fred and then we'll never get stopped."

"I would not. I saw her yesterday." Sibyl, who had hopped onto Marie's bed, offered up the box of tissues from the bedside table. "Here."

"Thanks." Marie took one and then hugged Freda who was right behind Donnalisa. Freda was seventeen now and had auburn hair, but with 'curls worse than Annie's' as she put it, and freckles over skin as pale as Marie's.

"Attention hog," Freda said tartly, sniffling a little. "Can't resist a scene, can you?"

"Fred!" Sibyl said in an appalled tone. "That's uncharitable!"

"Get a grip, Sibby." Freda took a tissue, then grabbed the box and rapped Sibyl on the head with it. "I'm kidding. But, god, Marie. What were you thinking?" She sat down next to Sibyl at the head of the bed and the two of them looked up at Marie expectantly.

"That I had to leave." Marie sat down on the foot of the bed, leaning against the white wrought-iron railing there. "That was all. Mama and Daddy, they were so sad. Every time I turned around, it was worse..." She pulled her knees up and rested her chin on them, biting her lip.

"You..." Donnalisa punched Marie in the near shoulder, hard. "That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard, Marie."

"Ow! Donli!" Marie smacked at her cousin. "What would you have done if it was your Mama crying all the time and the preacher coming over and talking about how they should find a better place for me to stay?"

"He said that?" Donnalisa threw herself down on the bed. "Christ. I'm gonna hit him instead. Marie, you didn't really think they'd send you away?"

"Yeah," Freda said, nodding. "You could have come and stayed with us or something even. 'Sides, your Meemaw would so take a strip out of Auntie Sharon if you got sent away. You're her favourite. Don't even get started on Nona."

"It wasn't just that." Marie picked Ann up off the floor and fixed her braids, trying not to cry, remembering sitting here and making the decision to leave. "I was dangerous. I mean, I almost killed Cody and I only touched him for a few seconds. And I didn't want to do that to any of you. What if it got worse and what if I made a mistake with one of you or one of the kids or..." She shook her head and blinked away the tears that wouldn't stay away.

"Aw, honey," Donnalisa said, reaching out to pat Marie's knee.

"I understand." Sibyl crawled over Donnalisa to put her arm around Marie's shoulders. "You were just trying to do the right thing. It's not like anyone knew what to do," she said defensively to the others.

"It was still stupid, Marie," Freda said stubbornly, shoving more tissues at her. "You could have been killed or raped or something out there."

Marie laughed at that and shook her head, taking the tissues. "Well, yeah. I kind of found that out. But I'm okay now."

There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment as the other three girls looked at each other and then back at Marie.

"Really?" Donnalisa said at last.

"Yeah." Marie said quietly, meeting the other girl's eyes.

"But I thought people couldn't touch you or they'd get hurt, just like you said?" Sibyl frowned at Marie.

"They can't, Sibby," Freda gave Sibyl a glare. "Don't be so dense."

"What happened to them, then?"

Marie turned to look at her younger cousin and was struck by how much it was like looking in a mirror tuned to several years ago. "Some of them died, Sibby," she said gently. "And some of them were lucky and didn't." Sibyl's eyes got huge but to her credit, she didn't pull away.

"They got what they deserved, then," she said at last, setting her jaw.

"Yep." Freda nodded firmly. "They touched you, that's what they get."

"Amen to that." Donnalisa reached out to squeeze one of Marie's hands. "We're just glad you're okay."

There was an unexpected knock at the half-open door, and Sharon came in, a tray in her hands. "I know you're all too old for brownies and milk," she said with a little smile, "but you can humour me for now, right?" She put the tray down on the bed, with a plate of brownies and four glasses of milk on it, then she kissed Marie on the top of the head.

"Thanks, Mama." Marie looked up at her mother and smiled and for a moment, everything was normal and real. Sharon tucked some of Marie's hair back from her face.

"You're welcome, baby girl." Sharon shook her head a little. "You should put some barrettes in, Marie. You're hiding that pretty face."

"Mama!" Marie rolled her eyes and reached for a brownie. "My hair's fine. I like it like this."

"Yes, but you don't have to look at you. The rest of us would like to see you once in a while." Sharon looked around the room. "Where'd the four of you run that poor man of yours off to, Marie?"

Marie was glad she had nothing in her mouth at the moment, or she might have choked on it. "My... He's outside, reading."

"I'll go see if he wants a coffee then." Sharon patted Marie on the shoulder. "You girls have fun." She left the room and closed the door behind her.

"Your man?" Donnalisa said around a mouthful of brownie. "The guy who was leaving when we came in?"

"His name is Logan," Sibyl informed them smugly, pleased to be first with the information. "And he's nice."

Marie looked over at Sibyl, her expression bemused. "Nice?" -He's never going to hear the end of this one,- she thought, trying not to laugh.

"He doesn't look like the nice-guy type, Sibby," Freda said a little sharply.

"Well, I think he is," Sibyl retorted. "He was awful good with Lexy. Real patient and all, playing with him. It was cute. Lexy didn't have a single fit all lunch."

Freda looked impressed. "No hitting?"

"Nope." Sibyl shook her head. "Not a once. Lexy was a right angel."

"Well," Donnalisa said philosophically, reaching for another brownie. "Can't tell a book by its cover. So he's nice. What else? How old is he?"

Marie grabbed a glass of milk and decided to forego eating for the moment. "Older than me," she said cryptically.

"Translation, he looks younger than he is and you're not telling until it's too late for your Daddy to throw him out," Freda said dryly.

The other girls all laughed and Marie shook her head. "Already way too late for that. They throw him out, I'm going too."

"Ooh. You two are serious." Donnalisa looked up at Marie with a grin.

"Pretty much." Marie shrugged. "About as serious as that."

"Of course they're serious," Sibyl said with a snort. "You don't run away for two years and then get some guy you just kinda like to come home with you."

"She has a point," Freda admitted.

"So, we'd better get used to him then?" Donnalisa asked.

"It might be a good idea," Marie said with a smile. "We're leaving tomorrow morning, but he'll probably come back with me some other time."

"Tomorrow! That's too soon," Sibyl protested.

Marie put an arm around Sibyl, giving her a half-hug. "I'll be back, honey."

"You're not staying?" Donnalisa rolled over and sat up, frowning.

"No," Marie said. "I've got a job now, and studies, and everything to get back to. I can't just not go back. Besides. I love you guys but that's home now for me. I love being up north, I love the school and my friends."

"Well, start talking," Freda ordered, moving the tray to the desk so she could stretch out on the bed. "You're not leaving until you tell us everything."

Marie shook her head, thinking, -Wow. If I told you everything, you'd never believe me.- But she laughed and said, "Everything? Well. I'll see what I can do."

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tag and title from Passing Through by Leonard Cohen