xp_logs | Amanda and Nathan, Wednesday afternoon (Reply)

Amanda stops by Moira's rooms to get her birthday present. She and Nathan wind up talking about a couple of difficult subjects (flashbacks, Rack, and Manuel), between the playful banter.

Nathan was scanning the bookshelves, trying to find one of the Umberto Eco books that had arrived in the Amazon shipment, when he heard the knock at the door and sensed Amanda's unmistakable presence outside.

"It's open," he called, his eyes flickering sideways to the box that had arrived in the mail this afternoon. He hadn't opened it; he had no wrapping paper or anything, and he hadn't wanted to totally deprive her of the fun of unwrapping her birthday present.

"Hey." Amanda practically bounced into the room, radiating good cheer. True to her word whe was wearing one of the shirts Pete had gotten for her, "Jesus hates me" emblazoned across her chest. "Recovered from Homily's calming potion yet?"

Nathan blinked at the t-shirt, and then mock-glared at her. "Yes," he said balefully, trying not to grin. "You ought to have a license before you can dispense that stuff. You know, I didn't dream? At all? Crashed in one spot on the bed and didn't budge, too." He found the book he'd been looking for and pulled it out, heading back to the chairs by the window. "So sit down," he invited, flopping back down in the armchair and eyeing the package underneath the table. "That would be yours," he said, nodding at it.

Amanda stuck her tongue out at him. "You probably needed it," she retorted. "Tho' I might have t'apologise t' Moira later for spoilin' her fun, if you were doin' the immovable object impersonation _all_ night." She giggled at his expression and pounced gleefully on the box, carrying it over to the other chair. She curled her legs up under her, the box in her lap, and started working her way through the heavy-grade tape and industrial staples.

"I asked Romany for some advice," Nathan said, watching her attack the box. "Given that I'm not used to buying for people your age... I mean, I bought Dom birthday presents and so forth those first couple of years, but all she ever wanted back then were guns. Or knives." He snorted softly.

"Not really my thing," Amanda agreed. "I only used t' carry a blade t' protect meself on the streets, an'once I got here, I found out just how useless I am with one." There was a trace of bitterness in her tone, a flash of memory - the snap of her wrist as the soldier disarmed her - before she turned her attention back to the box. She managed to get through the tape and opened the flaps, only to encounter another layer of paper and bubblewrap. "Make me work for it, why don't you..." she muttered under her breath at the box.

Nathan tilted his head, catching the image that escaped from her mind. "I'll help you become less useless, if you want," he offered without thinking. "Although... there are self-defense classes here, aren't there? Perhaps you'd be better off with that..."

"I'm doin' 'em - beginner's self defence is compulsory, any way. Pete teaches it." Amanda had lifted the object - something solid and rectangular - from the box and was carefully unwrapping the packaging. "An' I was doin' some extra classes with Re... with someone else, 'til things got a bit out of control with the addiction thing. But if Pete wouldn't mind, I could do with some more - magic ain't reliable, especially when there's metal involved - Ican't do shite with it," she explained. Any other discussion was forgotten as she finally unearthed the object - a box of heavy, dark wood, certain healing glyphs carved into the wood. "Bloody fuckin' hell," she breathed.

"It's for your herbs and so forth," Nathan said helpfully. "I looked at stuff like that on a number of different sites, but... well, most of it seemed a bit..." The right word wouldn't come, and he shrugged. "That one seemed--solid. I gather it's fairly old."

"It is." Amanda could feel the slight tingle of mystic energy under her hands as she ran them across the box - nothing major, just the residue of years of magical use. "I can feel it..." She opened the lid, inhaling the traces of herb-smell left by the previous owner, an almost-reverent expression crossing her face. Then she looked up, set the box down carefully beside her, and practically leapt at Nate, throwing her arms around his neck and giving him a tight hug. "Thank you."

Nathan did his best not to jump out of his skin. "I'm--glad you like it," he said with a tentative smile, patting her awkwardly on the back. "Happy birthday."

"'Like it'? That don't even begin t' cover it..." Amanda released her chokehold on Nate and went back to her chair. "This... I don't even have the words t'start sayin' how great this is." She picked up the box again, almost cuddling it. She smiled at him, a little goofily. "I could get used t' this birthday thing."

Nathan's smile grew a little more steady. "Well, enjoy them while you're young. By the time you're my age, birthdays are no fun at all." His eyes flickered sideways to the radio Moira had gotten him for his birthday, and he chuckled softly. "Most of the time, at least." Even with the sudden reappearance of his visions that same night, he could still look back on the hours beforehand with fondness.

"Well I ain't really enjoyed most of the ones before, but this one makes up for it." Amanda ran her hand over the smooth wood of the box again in an unconscious gesture. "Rack weren't one for cake an' gifts. More like 'rites of passage' involvin' a new level of magic, whether I were ready or not." Another memory-flash, this one clouded by pain and bloodloss - a rough wooden table, a bone knife, fire and blood and people in black cloaks. She winced and closed her eyes. "Sorry, didn't mean t' get morbid at you. There's this project Doc Strange and I have been workin' on, 's been stirrin' up stuff."

Nathan straightened in his chair, his gaze lingering on her face, troubled. "It's okay," he said quietly, turning the image over in his mind and not liking it at all. "Trust me, not about to complain about anyone else having flashbacks..."

"I thought they was just nightmares," Amanda said, shrugging. "Turns out they ain't, an' that Rack was a bigger arsehole than I'd thought."

"Something he did to you?" Nathan said slowly. She was looking reluctant to answer, though, so he thought for a moment, then offered something of his own. "I still have flashbacks to my conditioning sometimes, even twenty years later. It amazes me how much I do remember. Even the smell of the perfume that one of the empaths was wearing." He smiled faintly, making a somewhat helpless gesture. "It used to happen most often when I tried to... push past the conditioning, I suppose you'd say. My mind trying to reset itself and running into a brick wall."

His words struck a chord - Amanda looked surprised, then frowned slightly in thought. "This project me an' Strange're doin'... it's figurin' out what spells he used on me, the ones he cast t' bind me to him. Could explain why it keeps comin' back lately." She lay the box aside again, shifted forward to the edge of the chair, and hesitantly pulled her shirt up to reveal the scarring on her stomach. "These spells."

Nathan's eyes narrowed a little, despite his best effort to keep his expression level. "Nothing like being reminded of him every time you look at yourself, I imagine," he said bleakly, studying the scars for a moment before raising his eyes to hers again. "It's a hell of a brave thing you're doing, delving into something like that," he said frankly, then smiled, a bit ruefully, but meaning it. "You'll be glad you did, I think," he offered. "May not be pleasant, but I'm betting it'll be worth it, in the end."

Amanda tugged her shirt back down, looking oddly relieved. "I hope so," she said. "Strange said there might be a counterspell, somethin' t' reverse what Rack done - not the scars, I've got those for good, an' since they're magical, I can't even hide 'em with a glamour. But gettin' him out of me head... yeah, that would be worth it." She gave another of those 'I'm tough, really' shrugs. "We'd have t' find the prick first, tho', so I ain't holdin' me breath. Rom's been tryin' t' track him down for years, an' I think even Pete's tried."

"I'm sort of regretting now that my own sources wouldn't be any use in finding someone like that," Nathan said, giving her his best 'no, I'm not a homicidal maniac, why do you ask?' look. "I'd love to have a chat with this guy after you did whatever you needed with him."

She chuckled. "You an' the rest. Seems like there's gettin' t' be quite the queue. But thanks for offerin'."

"We could call dibs on various pieces," Nathan suggested innocently, and then smiled, spreading his hands wide. "Anyhow. Tell me you're doing something fun today, besides classes?"

"Now that's a fun image," Amanda said, grinning impishly. "Think I'll keep that one." Then she nodded. "Yeah, I am..." She made a face. "But I don't think yer'd approve so I won't say who with."

Nathan winced, but forced himself to smile. "It's not that I approve or don't approve, Amanda... I just want it to turn out okay. For both of you, I suppose." He stopped, a bit surprised by how uncharitable he was feeling towards Manuel today.

"Well, considerin' he's takin' me t' a punk club, I ain't too sure how it will turn out meself - it ain't his type of thing at all," Amanda replied. "An' we'll be careful. No foolin' around with powers at all."

"I trust you to learn from your experiences," Nathan said a bit wryly. "Doubt you'd have made it this far if you didn't."

"One thing you can say for me, I don't make the same mistake twice," Amanda agreed. She carefully picked up the box again. "Thank you, Nate. You ain't so bad, for an anti-role model."

"Well, I try," Nathan said with a chuckle. "Have--have a good time tonight, okay?" he said a bit hesitantly, and when she looked at him, grinned sheepishly. "I do mean that."

"I will." She smiled at him. "An' thanks. You ain't half the grump you make yerself out t' be, y'know?"

"You keep catching me on my good days. Well, or my less-than-sane ones." Nathan waved at her. "Go on, get out of here," he said good-naturedly. "I'm sure you've got lots of other people wanting to wish you happy birthday. I shouldn't be monopolizing your time."

"I'll have t' start keepin' an appointment book," Amanda laughed, and, giving his shoulder a squeeze as she passed him, she left, hugging her present to her chest.