xp_logs | Nathan and Manuel, Wednesday

Nathan goes looking for Manuel to discuss just how the Askani plan to help him. Manuel meets Galin, the most experienced of the Askani empaths, and the two of them have a bit of a philosophical debate that doesn't actually go all that badly. Galin agrees to train him. Manuel is happy. Nathan is resolute, but not looking forward to it all that much.

Manuel's dive cut the water cleanly, and he didn't surface again until he was three-quarters of the way across the pool. He swam to the far edge, then turned around to swim back to the edge he dove in from. He's focused on nothing, so his empathic power is free to do as it wishes. Right now, that's merely keeping an empathic eye out on the surroundings, to see if anyone approaches.

Nathan was finding that he could tolerate the whole hobbling-around crap a little better today, knowing that it was going to get markedly easier once he'd swapped his current cast for an aircast. Or maybe it was just knowing that he and Moira would be on a plane in forty-eight hours, he reflected humorously as he made his way out to the side of the pool. Manuel was underwater when he got there, and he went over and sat down in the same lounge chair where he'd spent a significant portion of yesterday afternoon, content to wait for him to surface.

Manuel surfaced, and then looked over to Nathan. "Hola." he called over to the big man. "Soaking up some sun?"

Nathan smiled a little. "Not really," he said lightly. "Got a little bit too much yesterday already." Moira had teased him shamelessly about the mild sunburn and insisted he needed a hat if he was going to fall asleep out by the pool. Given her taste in hats, he'd decided that distracting her would be a good idea at that point. "Actually, I was looking for you."

"You found me." he said calmly, then ducked back underwater to swim another lap. When he next popped up, he stopped dead and looked at Nathan. "Looking for me for _what_?"

"Well, you never answered my email. Figured that meant you were waiting for me to come to you." He had actually figured that had been Manuel's way of trying to push him into a suppliant's role in response to his attempt to preemptively draw some boundaries, but Askani had scolded him roundly and told him not to be so suspicious.

"Oh. That. I kinda forgot about it, really." he said, choosing to lazily float on his back in the warm sunshine. "So - what did it say again?"

#See?# Askani said pointedly.

#Oh, yes, it's just so much better that his brain occasionally resembles a sieve,# Nathan retorted, then focused on Manuel's question. "It said, basically, that we needed to talk about this agreement you and Askani made," he said, finding it surprisingly easy to keep this at the conversational level. Getting actual sleep and eating actual food seemed to be doing wonderful things for his temper. "Since I'm sort of the middleman, one way or the other."

Manuel oh'ed softly, but continued floating. "So what do you want to know about it? I talked to Askani, and we reached an accomodation. You're the means by which she crosses from There to Here. Seems pretty simple to me. You won't even have to be there, and she won't have to manifest physically for what she wants to do. I think."

"I don't think we're going to be able to get away with that," Nathan told him. "Me not being there, I mean." He stopped for a moment, rubbing at his jaw and trying to organize his thoughts. "Askani's unique among her people," he said. "She is... was a phenomenally strong psi, and my powers are precisely the right sort for her to borrow." He smiled a bit wryly. "The empaths you need aren't in that position."

Manuel hrmmed to himself. "That could be a problem, then. It seems that my training is in your hands, then. You can kill it with a word, or let it happen." He didn't look too happy about it, but he did content himself with just that. "I think it's in both our interests to see me trained."

"I have no intention of killing it, Manuel," Nathan said quietly. "I had actually agreed to help Askani help you well before the two of you had your dreamtime conversation." He grimaced a little as he lifted his cast-encased leg up onto the lounge chair. "It's not too much of a problem," he said. "You've seen them speak through me - the empaths can do that easily, and they're putting their, uh, currently non-existent heads together to figure out just how to demonstrate techniques to you."

"That's reassuring." he said with a smile. "I have to admit that I am looking forward to the training. It will be nice to actually have some control for once in my life."

"They claim I'll be useful," Nathan said, leaning back into the chair with a sigh. "I understand if you're not comfortable with that. I'm not particularly, myself."

Manuel hrmmed at that, then shrugged again. "I'm not the one teaching it, so I can't say who will or will not be useful. If they say you are, I must believe them. Can't say I like the idea much - the last time I scanned you empathically, you tried to tear the Mansion down. I'm none too keen on a repeat performance."

Oh, look. A cloud that looked like an elephant. "Galin - that's the empath you talked to at lunch that time, claims that interacting with me on an empathic level will teach you subtlety," Nathan sighed. "Plus they want someone in the here and now to test your defenses from time to time."

Manuel scowled at _that_ idea. "Is that _safe_?" he asked dubiously. "I can't afford the repair bills."

Nathan smiled humorlessly. "Askani claims she can smack me down before I do any damage, if things get out of hand."

"Smack you down?" he repeated with a puzzled look. "I don't understand the phrase."

"Render me very quickly and efficiently unconscious?" Nathan amended dryly.

Manuel oh'ed again. "That makes sense. Can they do that? Doesn't that bother you any?"

"She can do it easily," Nathan said frankly. "And it bothers me enormously." He studied Manuel, floating at the side of the pool, for a long moment. "The idea of being your guinea pig is almost enough to leave me in a cold sweat. I'm not sure if I'd even be willing to entertain the idea if I hadn't been doing so much work with Charles over the last couple of months."

"Somone has to, and Charles is impervious to my power. Would you prefer a different 'guinea pig'? Simply name the name, and I'm sure Askani could arrange it. If it's Angelo, you'll even make me very, very happy in the process." he said smugly.

Nathan raised an eyebrow. "I think the whole point of it being me," he said very carefully, "is that your experimentation will be... circumscribed, right from the get-go. You'll have to be judicious, whether you want to be or not. As I said, Galin thinks it'll teach you subtlety." He paused. "Do you want to talk to him?"

"Does he want to talk to me? I know the point was supposed to be subtlety - I was just hoping to get a good shred or two in. Ah well. I wasn't terribly serious about suggesting Angelo anyway." he said as he floated.

Nathan stifled the instinctive response and turned his attention inwards instead. #Feel free, Galin,# he invited, and heard the old empath chuckle a bit nastily as he emerged with dizzying speed, taking control.

"You did strike me as a nasty little son of a flonq," Nathan heard his voice, sounding older and far more gravelly, say. "I'm relieved to see that death hasn't dulled my instincts."

"Who, me or Nathan?" he asked not-Nathan with some amusement. "I have my moments."

"You, Manuel," Galin said. "I know perfectly well that Nathan's more than a bit of a bastard. There's a reason our Lady was so drawn to him."

"I defend myself when I'm attacked. Seems perfectly rational to me. My problem is that I am attacked by things that don't bother most people who aren't empaths. But I don't think I need to tell you this - you should know. I've never met another empath. I was beginning to wonder if I was unique." he said with a smile, and a quick roll through the water to cool his front side off.

"It's not a common gift," Galin said with a snort. "Wasn't, even in our time. Telepaths and telekinetics, oh, they cropped up on a regular basis. Flonqing commonplace, they were."

Manuel shrugged at that. "I have very little experience with mutantkind. I met one or two in the asylum, and then the students here. That's all."

"Mutantkind..." Galin mused. "That's a funny sort of term. Would tend to indicate that we all have common cause, and that's very much not the truth." Another grating chuckle. "As you undoubtedly know, given that you have a power that terrifies other mutants."

"My power terrifies everyone." he clarified. "And I meant it as opposed to normal folks without powers. And I can see why they're scared - I've tried to do some good with my power, and it has uniformly failed."

"It certainly has," Galin said. "So why do you think it has?"

"Because I have no idea what I'm doing, really, and people can't handle what I try to do for them. I gave happiness, and spurred a neuros ... a problem. I merely looked into another, and the reaction nearly killed me. I've been locked into escalating happy-loops. It has not gone well." he remembered with a sour grin.

Nathan sat up abruptly, wanting to object to the second item on Manuel's list - the boy had most certainly not just 'looked' that day! - but Askani hissed warningly at him, and Galin went on before Nathan could try and reclaim control. "Ah, so it's the fault of the people whom you were trying to help?" he asked mockingly.

Manuel shrugged. "I guess so." he said casually, then, bored with just floating, swam a lap of the pool before continuing. "It's so -simple- when I can see it, and yet it -never- goes right."

"You think people are simple, because you take a basically simple-minded approach to them," Galin said caustically. "The emotional realm is the most complex and intricate system in existence. Far more so than the mind itself, much as the telepaths would disagree, because emotions shape thoughts easily, naturally. It works in reverse, but only with a struggle."

Manuel stopped to think about that for a second. "Well, the colors do get a little bright, and half the time I have no idea what they mean. But the stuff I do is easy - shove here, they feel this way. Shove there, they feel something else. Simple, and it works."

"Except you create chain reactions you don't understand, and can't control," Galin pointed out. "I don't think you can claim that what you do works, when it blows up in your face as often as it does."

"I would show you, but I don't want Nathan to blow up the Mansion." he said. "And it did me just fine when I was on the streets, except for the thing there at the end, with Eduardo. That didn't go well at _all_. I used to be able to get people high on a feeling in return for cash, a place to stay, food, that sort of thing."

"But now you're here, interacting with people who are a little more of a challenge," Galin said. "You want more from them - isn't that the issue?"

"I want to find out who I am, and be me." he said confidently. "No more Mirror, no more fumbling in the dark. I want to know what I am doing, so I can use my power to make my own way in the world."

"And what does that involve, boy?" Galin said, and Nathan could suddenly sense, almost taste his suspicion. "Making your way in the world."

"I want a return to glory, to wealth, to power for my family. I want to make the de la Rocha name _mean_ something once again, instead of the pale shadow of its former glory. I want us to be what we used to be!" he exclaimed, clearly something he's thought about before. "And by doing that, I can help you and yours."

Galin was silent for a long moment, but didn't relinquish control, and Nathan was reduced to simmering impotently in the back of his own mind. "I don't know that I want to teach you, boy," he finally said. "That future of yours is something to be avoided, yes, but I'm not certain placing a selfish, Askani-trained empath in any sort of position of power is to be preferred."

"Why _not_? Start making sense. It is the only way? Why else would I have this power if not to USE IT!" he shouted in his passion. "You want to train me to use my gift, and then not have me ever use it? What's the point, then? I may as well stay mundane then."

"Don't be any more of a child than you have to be," Galin snorted. Nathan reached out, intending to wrestle control back, but had his mental 'hands' abruptly slapped by Askani, who murmured almost comfortingly to him, telling him this was a necessary conversation. "I want you to use your gift. Otherwise it's a waste. But if you use it primarily to benefit yourself, boy, you will destroy yourself. Do you not see? When you want something, your emotions become involved. If you focus your empathy on achieving your desires, the two become inextricably linked. Eventually, you function as an empath only to get what you want, and then, Manuel, then you become the parasite."

"So now I have to put on a monk's robe and serve _others_ with my gift? Where's the fairness in that? All I want is the know-how, really. That's all. Just like fighting that war of yours wasn't serving yourselves? Come _on_, we all serve ourselves. Selfless devotion is rare." he gritted out. "Perhaps this won't work out after all. I don't know anymore." he sniffled.

"The key is balance, my boy," Galin told him. "To walk the middle ground between pleasing yourself and taking into account the needs of those around you. An empath can wreak pain quite unintentionally, and from a practical standpoint, doing that creates enemies. If you please yourself too much, you sow the seeds of your own destruction." Galin laughed. "As for selflessness, there is something to be learned from the telepaths. Theirs is the realm of will and forethought. They understand that desire can be tempered, or negated. It's a useful lesson for us. Which is why we will be making use of Nathan."

"Will is an emotion, not a thought. You don't think about having willpower - you have it or you do not. And I don't understand what you are saying, not entirely - but I do see a point there. There needs to be some giving in order to get." he said thoughtfully.

"Wish is an emotion, Manuel. Will is a balance of forces, a conscious act." Galin chuckled dryly. "We'll discuss this all at length, not to worry. You'll become quite sick of the philosophical debates, but they're integral to making the sort of choices you're facing."

"So you will teach me, then?" he said, pathetically hopeful look on his face.

"I will. We will," Galin amended. "Lusanya and Evaris and I. I was the first and strongest of the Clan's empaths, and they were my prize students. It should be interesting, the four of us." He laughed again. "But not just yet, youngster. Our host needs a bit of time to recover from his latest bout of foolishness and work up the courage to do what's necessary to help you. When you're both home from your time away should be soon enough to make a beginning."

"WOOHOOOO!" Manuel shouted, doing a backflip in the pool out of sheer joy. His eyes also glowed crimson, as his nascent control slipped and he projected his happiness to all and sundry. "FINALLY!"

Nathan flinched back in the chair, even as he felt a dim, but persistent sensation of happiness. It wasn't enough to trigger anything, though, and he relaxed, letting it drive away a little of the tension sitting and listening to the conversation had provoked. Then, he realized that Galin had withdrawn and his voice was his own again. "I've talked to Charles about it," he said. "Once we're both back, like Galin said..."

Manuel looked up at Nathan, his eyes glowing red. "Not a problem. Enjoy your time away. When you come back, we'll set it up. Mornings are probably best, as Amanda's playing with the horses anyway so I'm usually bored."

"And my language courses are going to be in the afternoon, so that'll work." Nathan started to get out of the chair, wincing a little. "Now, I have an appointment to go get this cast off, so you'll have to excuse me."

Manuel waved a hand dismissively, and climbed out of the pool to go get his towel. "Amanda's gonna scream when she finds out. She's gonna be _so_ happy..." he muttered as he dried himself off.