Sarah, Amanda, and a bottle of vodka

[x-marrow.livejournal.com]

Sarah's mellow, and Amanda's having a rough week. Vodka is consumed, and somehow Sarah comes up with some words of wisdom before Amanda finally falls asleep.



It was late. It didn't matter. Sarah would be up, and if she wasn't, she'd have to get up to disembowel the witch knocking on her door at whatever time it happened to be. Perfect reasoning, Amanda decided, knocking on the door again.

Sarah was up, but not planning to be for long by the looks of things, sprawled out like a cat on her bed.  There was a soft groan of annoyance, followed by footsteps towards the door.  And a soft squeak as it opened. "Oh, hey.  What's up?"

"Apart from the Queen of Limbo in the medlab and the fact we could be invaded by demon hoardes at any minute? Not a bloody thing." Amanda pulled a bottle of vodka out from under her jacket. "Don't want t' think any more. Care t' join me?"

"Wait... didn't she fight -off- the demon hoardes?"  Sarah pulled Amanda in, before there was a chance for anybody to come down the hall and notice her standing there with a bottle of vodka.  The door shut behind her, and she flipped the lock.  "Nevermind.  It'd probably help if I'd actually been around this weekend."  She grabbed a couple of cups from a drawer in her desk.  "Not thinking for a while'd be nice."

"Only that ones that were stagin' a coup," Amanda said, flopping down on the bed unasked. She looked beyond tired - the fact she was half-way through her third sleepless night and she'd been nigh-constantly spellcasting during that period was starting to tell. She held the bottle out to Sarah. "Noticed you were quiet this weekend. Go off to visit the family again?"

"Some stuff had to be done."  She nodded, hoping that maybe Amanda was too tired to notice she hadn't really answered the question.  She poured the cups half-full and handed one over, putting the cap back on the bottle before taking her own cup and wasing down onto the bed beside her.  "I came back, and suddenly I'm the mellow one.  Go figure."

"Could let you have all the fun of bein' the grouchy one," Amanda said with a weak grin, before knocking back a healthy mouthful of spirit. "Maybe I should join you next time you do yer stuff - certainly puts you in a good mood. I figured yer'd at least growl at me for wakin' you up."

"That's cause I wasn't asleep," she shrugged, "and it probably doesn't hurt I had a very, ah, productive chat with the pretty boyfriend earlier."  She grinned at the younger girl, and downed her glass.

"Ah, I like those chats." Amanda giggled a little and finished her drink, gesturing at the bottle and floating it over because she really couldn't be arsed getting up. The effort sent a twinge of pain across her temples and she winced. "Another good way of not thinkin', tho' if yer pretty boyfriend happens t' be an empath tryin' t' block out the general insanity, not so much of an option. Even if he is gettin' better at the shieldin'." She tapped her head. "Too much in here for him t' deal with. Too much for me, come t' think of it." With that she poured another generous measure into her cup and passed the bottle to Sarah.

Sarah smacked Amanda's hand at sight of the wince. "Stop that.  I'm perfectly capable of getting things without you giving yourself a migraine."   She took the bottle, and poured herself another helping in her cup. "Yeah.  I imagine I wouldn't do well with a 'path.  I'm too fucked up in here for most people's comfort."

It was a sign of how safe Amanda felt with Sarah that she didn't react to the smack with an automatic shielding spell as she had been for the past few days. Or perhaps it was a sign of how exhausted she was. Certainly the vodka was hitting her a lot harder than usual. "Poor Manny. I trashed his room, y'know. Friday night," she said with a sigh, knocking back the shot again. Brain dead was good, as fast as possible. "Good thing the X geezer's got his brain full of everyone else right now, eh? Won't notice our little party down here."

"I wouldn't think that too loudly.  With my luck, that'll set off some sort of neon sign in the Professor's brain."  She took another couple of swallows, and lounged out on the bed again, head cradled in the crook of her arm.  "Please tell me he's not giving you a hard time about this.  I may have to have some words with him."

"Doesn't have to. 'M perfectly capable of doin' that all by meself," Amanda said solemnly, finishing her drink and holding out the cup for more. "He's been... he's been a bloody marvel, really. Forgave me for callin' him Rack when I was off me head, cleaned me up after Nate sent me t' sleep, puts up with me havin' nightmares every time I close me eyes..." Amanda gave Sarah a crooked grin. "Can't sleep, demonic minions'll get me," she paraphrased.

Sarah rolled her eyes, pouring another couple of mouthfuls into Amanda's cup.  The girl had to be slowing down soon, eventually.  "So it's you I need to be having words with,"  she said finally, finishing the rest of her own glass, "Quit it.  Giving yourself a hard time makes -nothing- better."  She reached out and squeezed Amanda's hand.  "You'll get past this."

Slumping was definitely happening - Amanda was gradually sliding down the wall and further onto the bed. "You remember that bollockin' I gave you? 'Bout not bein' able t' change? Ever wonder why I got so into you 'bout it?" She had another mouthful of vodka, and wrinkled her nose. Yep, she was definitely feeling it now. That was good - maybe she'd be able to sleep without waking up screaming. She continued without waiting for Sarah's answer. "I wasn't angry. More scared than anythin'. Scared for me. 'Cause if you can't be anythin' else than what you are, then I'm gunna be Rack's butt-monkey for the rest of me life." She'd been mainlining Buffy during the sleepless nights, and it was telling on her vocabulary. "What happened with Remy on Friday proved it. All it took was a bit of shouting an' shovin' me 'gainst the wall an' I'm right back where I started six years ago."

Sarah poured herself another half a cupful; rather, she started to pour and it ran out about half-way to a full glass.  She eyed it mournfully, put the bottle down onto the floor.  "But that's different," she corrected, "You weren't born into that.  That's not what you -are-.  I've been a monster from the start...and haven't I already had this conversation with you?" She gulped down more vodka.  "You are not dependent on him."

"Maybe. I dunno. 'M thick like that, takes me a while t' get somethin' through me head," said Amanda ruefully. "An' who's t' say I weren't born into it? This power of mine... with everyone always wantin' a piece, it was inevitable, really. Nothin' but a happy little magical battery." She drained the cup, and pulled a smaller bottle out of her inside jacket pocket. "Here, knock yerself out."

"Heh, sounds familiar."  She finished what was in her glass, pushing herself up so she could take the smaller bottle.  She managed her best tipsy-serious look at her, while screwing the top off.  "Don't ever think you deserve to get taken advantage of."  She poured more into her cup.  "I don't know where you got that idea, but he was not in the right.  Nothing gave him the right to use you like he did."

"Just wish it'd stop, is all." Amanda let her head rest on Sarah's shoulder, closing her eyes. "It keeps happenin', an' 'm tired of people takin' advantage 'cause they can. Tired of bein' scared." The last words slurred - the combination of sleeplessness and alcohol was beginning to tell. "I keep fightin' back, an' somethin' else just turns around an' kicks me in the teeth."

"Shhh," Sarah soothed, a hand running through Amanda's hair gently. "Nothing's gonna get you on my watch, Trouble.  Anybody tries, and Oscar and I'll beat the hell out of 'em." She glanced over at the puppy, who was snoring softly under her desk.  "Things'll be better in the morning, once you get rid of the gigantic hangover you're going to have."  She grinned, and finished up her glass.  That ought to be enough for the night.

"Don't get hangovers," Amanda muttered, snuggling more into Sarah at the touch. "An' if I do, there's a potion." She yawned and let her grip on her empty cup relax. "Just need t' rest me eyes is all..." Anything else she might have said was lost in a soft snore.

"I'll try not to wake you up in the morning,"  Sarah giggled softly, managing to get Amanda under the covers before crawling in beside her, regardless of how it may have looked to anyone who happened to come in. They were just trying to get a good night's sleep, is all.  Fuck knows they needed it.