Mutants and Molotovs: An early breakfast

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Early morning in Seattle, Jean goes to check out breakfast and discovers she's not the only early riser. She and Terry talk.



Neither good nor bad, the hotel's continental breakfast was best described as unimpressive. The fruit spread had much to be desired but that was as much because it was late fall as anything else. At least the coffee was hot.

Unsurprisingly, most of the kids were still in bed. They'd had a long flight yesterday and most of them were more night owls than morning people. But there were some who bucked the trend. Setting her tray down a nearly empty table, Jean smiled at Terry as she took her seat. "So, are you having fun?"

"Aye, I suppose I am. I mean, it's all interesting but frustrating too. Everyone is so upset but no one is doing anything about it." Terry twirled her straw through her water, listening to the ice cubes rattle together. She smiled up at Jean. "Was it like that when you went to Congress, Dr. Grey?"

"Somewhat," Jean said. "There are definitely some congressmen, and some delegates here, who are more interested in listening to themselves talk about a problem then doing anything about it. And, of course, nobody really agrees what the problem is."

Terry laughed, "I think after listening to them talk yesterday afternoon and last night on the television, I don't know what the problem is either. That one French guy seemed to think that the problem was that mutants were going to steal all the good jobs. I still don't know what the good jobs are supposed to be or how mutants were going to take them."

"Particularly when you consider what sort of jobs our mutations tend to make us best fit for. Namely, demolitions work." Jean grinned, thinking about the assorted property damage the school's inhabitants had managed through the years. "And so we all argue about what the problem is, and once we decide that we have to argue about what the best solution is, and how to best pull it off. Which is why change, official change, takes so long."

"And why the unofficial change is important, right? If we waited until the law caught up with us, we'd all be old and grey by the time everything made sense." Terry sipped her water, thinking about Tommy. "Do you think that the law will end up on our side?"

"Two hundred years ago, all men were created equal, so long as they were men, and were white, and were rich, and so on. Today? Whether or not we're all equal is questionable, but now nobody can tell you you can't do something because you're a girl, or stop Angelo because he's Hispanic or Kitty because she's Jewish. So yes, I think we'll win in the end but we can't assume it. You're right, the unofficial change is very important. If for no other reason than that it spurs on the official change more often than not."

Terry nodded. "Is that why you're...uh, on the team?" Saying X-man in a public place would have been bad. It was just hard to remember that sometimes when they were able to talk so freely when they were home. "Or...why are you?"

"It's part of it, yes," Jean said, smiling slightly. She hadn't had a chance to just sit and talk with Terry in too long. "Having the chance to help keep people safe is part of it, too. Some of my reasons may have changed over the years, but I've always wanted to help people who need it."

"I've thought about it," Terry said quietly, glancing at Jean to see how that confession went over. So many of the teachers treated her like she was still 11 and angry--fresh off the plane from Ireland. Jean had never really been like that though so Terry had hope. "Especially now that Clarice is but I've always wanted to."

Jean wasn't really surprised. A lot of the students thought about it, at least a little bit, and Terry would have thought about it more than just that little bit. "Well, what have you been thinking?"

Terry swirled her ice some more. "I'm only seventeen. Which means I'd have to ask Sean first and I can't see as to doing that considering." Considering that every talk they ever had ended up with yelling and tears, that is. "But...the police didn't want me to help them. I've no interest in being a lawyer really and I like my criminal justice classes. I also like going out there and doing what's right and just without having to worry about the red tape and everything. Plus it benefits us--mutants. Not just because we help actively but also because we're doing good and it...it's that unofficial change. The team changes minds."

"That sounds more like a process of elimination than anything else," Jean said. She was hardly going to try to talk Terry out of it if she honestly wanted to join the team, but she did want to know that Terry had really thought it out first. "And you'd be surprised how much red tape we do have to worry about. Some bureaucracy we can skip, some we have to, but where's the line between doing what we have to do, and doing what we can get away with because we're special?" She considered for a second then added, as almost a throwaway thought, "And you might be surprised about how a conversation with Sean about this would go."

"It was less a process of elimination and more an attempt at seeing what else was out there. I always wanted to be on the team. I just thought I should see what good I could do elsewhere." Terry smiled then sighed, "I can't talk to Sean. We haven't had a proper conversation since I was eleven and even then they usually consisted of 'dinner's ready' and me saying 'I don't want any'. I don't even know how to manage him."

Given a choice between talking about Terry's relationship with her father and her desire to join the team, there was no question in Jean's mind which was more important. "Interesting choice of words, sweetie," she said, considering the girl. "What makes you feel that Sean needs managing?"

Terry wrinkled her nose, "Well, not managing exactly. But, you know, he's only my father because of blood. He's never been my actual father. So I don't know what to do with him now that he's back. I don't want to be anything to someone who left me for so long."

"Did you ever meet my niece and nephew?" Jean asked, seemingly out of nowhere. "They're eight now, almost nine. For two years they didn't have an aunt, and now they do again. I couldn't be there for them, or for you, but that doesn't mean I don't love you all. That I don't regret the time I missed or the chances I lost..."

"You gave up your life to save everyone, Dr. Grey. Sean just gave up me for his job." But her voice was still more hurt than angry, like she wanted so much to believe differently but couldn't. "And all you missed is two years. Sean chose to miss my whole life. And he hates the man who chose me over being free and clear."

Jean understood the hurt, but she also knew Terry wasn't the only one who was hurt, although Sean didn't show it as easily as his daughter. "He didn't know, Terry," she said gently. "He had his choices about you taken away from him."

Terry's jaw set firmly, a certain stubborn light in her eyes that wasn't at all unfamiliar to someone who'd know her as long as Jean had. "He had a choice when he sent me to America," she said flatly, "And I don't remember him having much of a struggle doing so."

The look, which said as clearly as words 'if we're having this argument, we're damned well having it' almost got a smile, for all that it was not the time. Instead, though, Jean said, "So you blame him for choosing what was best for you, sending you here so we could train your powers and give you the chances he couldn't? Just because you don't remember him having difficulty with the choice doesn't mean he didn't."

"He didn't try. He just gave up after barely a year and ran back to his job even though he'd sworn up and down that he wanted nothing more than to be with his daughter." Terry kept her voice low because it would be bad to make a scene. "Don't mistake me, I love Xavier's. I'd never want to be anywhere else. But he left me."

Jean sighed, sensing Terry was getting more and more upset as the conversation went on. "I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to upset you, sweetie, especially not today. I know it's a difficult topic for you."

Terry sighed and rested her chin on her palm, looking glum. "It's okay, Dr. Grey. It's not your fault. It's just the way things are and I'm a little bit tired of people defending him. I just...I don't want to get along with him."

"And that's valid, although I don't understand it. I just don't like seeing you hurt, and it seems like you have a lot of pain about this."

Terry gave Jean a look she very rarely had to use with the doctor--the official 'How Can You Be So Dense?' Look. "It hurt a lot more losing my uncle then losing Sean right as I was learning about him. It's better than I don't get too attached."

"It's a hard way to live," Jean said, "but it's your choice to make. Seems like it would be very lonely, though, always keeping people at a distance."

"Not everyone." Not Bobby or Kitty. Or Alison or any of her other friends. She depended on them to fill in where family could not.

"Well, that's good to hear," Jean said, smiling at the girl. "So long as you have someone you can depend on, I won't worry so much."

Terry smiled at Jean brilliantly, pushing aside the conversation they'd just had in favor of making one of her favorite teachers feel better. "I have lots of people I can depend on, Dr. Grey. I haven't had to worry about that for years, not since I first came to New York."

Jean didn't miss that Terry was taking care of her - just one of the many reasons she was one of Jean's favorite students, her willingness to go out of her way for the people she cared about. She smiled fondly at the girl. "That is excellent news. But I've got to head out, sweetie." Jean glanced at her watch. "The debates will be starting soon and Nathan and I are going to do a quick look around, see... Well, see what things are like out there. But hey, if it's possible I'm going to see if one of the delegates will talk to us privately this afternoon. Between Nate and I we ought to be able to corral somebody interesting."

"Between you and Nathan," Terry said, amused, "they'll either talk to us or run screaming into the night. Either way it should be great fun." She finished off her water and piled everything onto her tray, clearing Jean's as well. "Wouldn't miss it for the world."