xp_logs | Nathan and Marius, Friday afternoon

Nathan goes to check on Marius after the incident in his office the day before. He learns quite a bit about how Marius feels about his mutation and related issues, and demonstrates that he has actually learned to know when to back off. Marius gets a chance to vent a little, and to be snide at his teacher. Win-win scenario... well, no, not really.

The suite door was open, and Nathan paused, then stuck his head in, seeing Marius sprawled on the couch in the common room. "Hey," he said, as lightly as he could. "Am I interrupting anything?"

Marius blinked up from the television, then pulled himself into a sitting position. "Nah," he said, hitting mute on the remote, "just watchin' some football. So," he paused, taking a moment to consider how to put this before giving up, "how's the brain?"

A smile slipped out before Nathan could quite help himself. "Not too bad," he said. "Back in the here and now, at least. Mind if I come in?"

"Please yourself," Marius said easily, repositioning himself on the couch to lean against one arm. He tracked his teacher's progress across the room and into one of the chairs. Probably he should get the apology out of the way first. "Right, so . . . sorry about your office."

"Hey," Nathan said almost gently, lowering himself into the chair. "None of that. I'm the one who owes you an apology. It's generally considered bad form for we staff-types to be pulling students into powers accidents, especially when the student in question is particularly vulnerable to the pulling." He gave Marius a long, measuring look. "How are you?"

"Bit sore, but no harm done." Marius smiled and pointed to the bruise on his face. "Angelo packs a hell of a punch. Definitely never saw that one comin'." His ego made a conscious decision to ignore the remark about vulnerability.

"Angelo's always been very into the hand-to-hand training," Nathan said with another little smile. "He might not do quite as much of it as an X-Men trainee, but he could probably hold his own against most of them."

Marius grinned, remembering Angelo's account of his match with Nathan. "He did pretty well from where I stood. Wasn't in much of a state to take him on anyway." He laced his hands behind his head and nodded at Nathan. "So what's up? Project stuff, or what?"

"'Or what'," Nathan said, his eyes flickering around the room for a moment before refocusing on Marius. He smiled again, a bit wryly this time. "I was worried about you," he said candidly. "After what happened. I wanted to check up on you."

Marius blinked. "I'm all right," he said, a little confused. Had Angelo said something? No, that didn't seem his style. Not that it really mattered. Marius shook his head. "Not so happy about what happened, yeah, but I'm okay." Although they were pushing Samson on him again. That was a little irritating.

Nathan raised an eyebrow. "Are you that surprised that I came to check on you?" he asked patiently. "I know I've been doing an awful lot of growling at you and we've had an unfortunate incident or three..."

"Just that people think it's a big deal, is all." The boy shrugged, his hands still behind his head. "Not like I haven't been doin' this for months now. At least this time Rahne didn't have to pull me out of the garage."

"I'm not totally unaware of what it's like to be at the mercy of your mutation," Nathan said after a moment, the faint smile lingering. "Not in the same way, and not with the same consequences, but still... feeling helpless isn't a good sensation however it happens."

Marius stared at the man. Helpless. Right. "Yeah, well," he said, sliding his eyes away from Nathan's, "that's the way my powers are. No use fixating. I've got a donation schedule to keep me from going mental an' I learn how to get a handle on what I can. Don't bite people when I pat 'em on the back anymore, at least. An' I figured out how to control some powers. Don't do too badly borrowing Rahne's anymore, for example." He flexed his gloved fingers against his scalp. "Could use some of that training Ange was talking about, but otherwise I've been doin' all right."

Nathan's eyes narrowed just a little. Oh, very much not healthy. "Training," he said instead, thoughtfully. "Shielding work, you mean?"

"Right. Moira said maybe the prof . . ." Marius dropped his hands to his lap. "Don't know. Powers bein' as tetchy as they are I don't think it's goin' to be fun." He'd hated the feeling of someone else in his head. Hated it. The only reason he was even willing to consider exposing himself to more psychic contact was because not getting the training meant what had happened with Nathan might happen again.

"Have you got a pad of paper and a pen?" Nathan asked, then looked around himself. There, on the desk. He extended a hand and the pad and pen floated over to him. "Charles is very good," he said, beginning to sketch, but holding the pad so that Marius couldn't see it. "I started working with him almost two years ago, now. When we started... I was so terrified of the idea of him in my head that it actually took one of my visions putting me into cardiac arrest to reconcile me to the need to do it."

"I'm not afraid," Marius said, narrowly managing to keep his tone from dipping into outright derision. "Not as if I've got anything to hide. I just . . . don't like how it feels." He remembered his first encounter with Rachel, months ago. It hadn't been nearly as bad, but it had been enough. "Never did."

Nathan looked up at him, his expression mild, inquisitive. "Did I say you were afraid? I said I was scared shitless." He smiled a little, turning his attention back to what I was doing. "Aversion can have a lot of emotional components behind it. Manuel would be shocked to know that I did occasionally listen to him at our sessions."

Marius knew Nathan had tutored Manuel in the past; he didn't take the bait. "All I know is it makes me crazy." And angry. He rolled his shoulders, irritated at the gathering tension in his neck. He didn't want to think about this right now.

"Something tied to your mutation, maybe," Nathan said, still sketching. "Think about Kyle for a minute, and how a feral mutation comes complete with instincts that aren't quite... baseline human."

Marius stiffened, his hands clenching in mid-flex. "I'm not feral," he said tightly, putting extra stress on the words just in case the other man was going hard of hearing. "Body just has a . . . setting. When it has to." I'm not like that. Marius forced his gaze back to the television screen, slowly uncurling his fists. I'm normal.

"Just an example," Nathan said mildly, filing away the reaction, his eyes still on the pad of paper. "We're all adapted to our mutations in one way or another, beyond the visible. Ferals have altered senses. Energy-projectors have strange metabolisms..."

Marius gave him a look before turning away again. "And mine's just weird. I know. People've said. 'Instinctive reactive adaptivity' . . . whatever Forge bloody calls it. Saved my life. After bollocksing it up in the first place." He stared fixedly at Chile's soccer scores. "Think my power's done all the adaptin' I'll ever need."

"Leaving you to do all the adapting to it," Nathan said. "Mutations are demanding bitch-things at times..." He finished the sketch and then tore the piece of paper from the pad carefully, extending it to Marius.

Marius stared at the offered paper for a moment, his gaze slowly flickering up to Nathan's face, then back again. Then he took it, raising a sardonic eyebrow. "Nice. Very swirly. What's this supposed to do?"

Nathan grinned suddenly and rose. "If you figure it out," he said, "you get bonus marks on your independent study."

Great, insane doodle-riddles. He folded the paper twice and stuck it in his sweatshirt pocket. "Ta for the offer." He didn't even bother making an attempt to mitigate the flatness in his voice anymore. Why did he have to go and start on that? I was doing fine. Marius settled deeper into the couch, arms crossed over his stomach. He felt a little nauseous all of a sudden. "I'll think about it."

Nathan went over to the window, peering out at the grounds. "I'm usually here to see Kyle," he said after a moment. "Here as in this suite, I mean. Forge is usually the one coming looking for me when he wants to see me."

Marius snorted. "Forge is busy like that. Break anything else he's made for you lately?" Not all of us need to see people to be okay.

"Haven't had the opportunity to use the repaired fancy stick as of yet," Nathan said, not looking back at the boy. "Funny, given everything I've gotten through with it, but all it takes one pissy gravity manipulator to send it to the shop for repairs."

"Must wear you down, savin' the world all the time. Rescuing kidnapped students and that." At some point he'd gone straight into insolent without noticing. Oh, how Marius wished he still gave a damn.

Nathan did look back at him this time. "You know," he said, "if you want to tell me off for something I've said or done here, feel free to do that, rather than beating around the bush. Seriously. What some of the rest of the teachers here would consider unpardonable insolence, I generally look at as mild snippiness at worse."

"I'm tired, all right?" It came out louder than he'd meant, but Marius didn't care. It wasn't as if there was anyone around to disturb. His hands balled against his ribs. "Why can't anyone let it alone? The docs an' Samson an' the rest, I've got concern comin' out my bloody ears. For months. I'm fine. Stop making it a problem!"

Instead of the automatic or expected reaction, Nathan gave it some thought. He wasn't sure Marius was particularly wanting to listen to reason, but he couldn't help remembering a few of the things he'd been told, what seemed like eons ago, about why some of the kids had been willing to talk to him in the first place. Not treating them as kids was possibly one of the few things he'd ever done right.

"I suppose," he said candidly, "part of that's the fact that we've had people go along thinking and saying they were fine, and then discover they weren't. At which point it was a real struggle to get back to fine. Leads to a certain institutionalized anxiety about students or colleagues or friends who you see dealing with things." He gave Marius another slight smile. "Probably doesn't make it any less irritating," he said, "or make you want to slug the next person who asks you how you are any less."

"Well, I'm not like that, all right? If it bothers me, I say it. When I want to who I want. But you lot keep tryin' to drag something out of me that isn't there like you've got some right to what's in my head." Marius punched one of the couch cushions, his mouth twisting in disgust. "Treat me normal, and I'll be normal. I'm good like that. Stop acting like I'm bloody damaged. It makes me sick."

Nathan felt a sudden stab of sympathy, remembering the times he'd railed about people expecting him to be blowing his brains up on a biweekly basis. "Do I have to treat you like you're normal?" he asked with a sudden smile. "Can't I treat you like the independent study student who skips process steps and makes me cranky - but makes it work?"

"Same thing." The anger was subsiding a little. Getting it out -- that had helped. Marius slumped back into the couch. "Just stop treating me different," he muttered, staring at the instant replay on the screen. "So I've got these powers. Doesn't matter. I'm still me. I just want to get on with it."

"Well, still-Marius," Nathan said without a trace of mockery, "if you'll take my word that I'm not going to lose it in your general vicinity again - it was a drug reaction, if you can believe that - think you might see your way clear to stopping by the office sometime tomorrow so that we can go over that proposal of yours? I dug up some additional references for you."

"That'd work." The boy took a deep breath and then looked up at his teacher. "Teachers doin' drugs, eh? Wow, just like home. If that was the reaction, can't wait to see the DTs. Though for the sake of the school's structural integrity, probably we should try to avoid that."

"We're experimenting with being able to shut my precognition off," Nathan said. Given that Marius had gotten caught up in it, he probably deserved to know what exactly 'that' had been. "Makes for a mighty big vulnerability on a mission, if I fall over twitching because the future got pushy. Unfortunately," he said dryly, leaning back against the windowsill, "my precog didn't take too kindly to being shut off. Wound up with recoil, for lack of a better word."

"One way of putting it," Marius agreed dryly. "Is it -- does it usually do that? Run over?" He didn't know much about the mechanics of Nathan's powers, but if that was normal Marius was definitely going to suggest they restrict all discussion of his project to email from now on.

Nathan shook his head immediately. "It was violent because of the recoil," he said immediately. "Broke my shields, hence the projection... it's been a long time since I lost my center like that. But," he said more briskly, "we know precisely why it happened, and exactly how to fix it. It's not going to be happening again."

Marius arched a skeptical eyebrow. "Just to be safe, think I'll file that one away under 'probably won't.' My power bein' how it is, and that." He rotated his neck lazily, working out the kinks. "You can really shut off powers with drugs? That'd be dead useful."

"You can't," Nathan said with a rueful look. "Not really. And not most mutations. But precog's electro-chemical, so it can be manipulated. Suppressed, at least to some extent." He sighed, folding his arms across his chest. "It was an experiment," he said, "because of the danger it poses when I'm out in the field. I'm not sure the safeguard's worth the side effects. I'm still seeing afterimages."

"Suppose it wouldn't be much use to me anyway. Real problem's not chemical." Marius couldn't remember the specifics of what he'd seen, but he remembered the pain. His hand automatically went to his ribs. "They always hurt like that? Felt like someone was working you over but good."

Nathan opened his mouth and then closed it again, unconsciously mimicking Marius's gesture. "Yeah," he said a little uncertainly, "they do. Mostly because I've broken them so often..." He shook his head, trying to shake the images away. "It's going to take a while to try and put that all together," he said more briskly. "I much preferred the days I didn't see my own future... and I envy Angie sometimes, seeing in metaphors."

"Actually meant the visions. How many times have you broken your ribs? Never mind," Marius said, remembering the rumors, "don't want to know. But yeah, I can see not wantin' to sit through a beating twice in a row. Now I've caught the live show of one of mine, I can honestly say once's enough."

"Depends on what I'm seeing - the days when I used to share deaths with people pretty much sucked," Nathan murmured. "As do beatings, no matter how many times you have to sit through them."

"Don't intend to have cause to get used to it," Marius said, absolutely serious. "Make love, not war an' that. More fun. Besides, the first bit doesn't end you in Medlab as often."

"Trust me," Nathan said, "no one's going to think any less of you if you avoid the doctors. Not even the doctors. I think they prefer to interact with the rest of us in their social, rather that professional capacity, whenever possible..."

Marius snorted. "I have to see 'em, remember? No one's allowed to give me anythin' without one around." A restriction that still rankled. Marius sighed and brushed his hair out of his eyes. "I like them all fine. Even Dr. Voght. It's just havin' to see them all the time that gets to me."

"I'm married to one of them, remember? And I'd still rather see her anywhere but the infirmary." He gave Marius a thoughtful look and another smile. "Although, you know, I first met Moira when I was her patient. I like to think that didn't set a bad precedent, but I may just be deluding myself on that score."

Marius cocked his head. "So what, I should keep hittin' on Dr. Voght? Done."

Nathan laughed, a very slightly mischievous look in his eyes. "I'm not sure if you guys realize it, but Doctor Voght is actually ten years older than I am."

Marius smirked. "So I should discriminate? Bit ageist of you." He stretched his arms over his head, popping his back. "Besides, two in three here you'd never guess the age of. Must be a side-effect of the X-factor."

"Never let it be said you didn't set your sights very, very high," Nathan said. "And seriously, Marius, I imagine the nearest drugstore does a booming trade in hair dye. In which I obviously do not indulge, but then, if I did, I wouldn't be able to blame my gray hair on you guys..."

"Guess Ms. Munroe gave up years ago, then. Ah, well." Marius absently scratched around one of the healing lacerations on his scalp. "I respect anyone's right to reinvent themselves. Though bugger me if I know why they do it with some of the haircolour I see around this place. Still not totally convinced the electric green's natural, but Lorna pulls it off."

"You remember Seattle, and some of the hair colors in the crowds there... probably some were natural, but I imagine a number came out of the bottle. Even for otherwise obvious mutants."

"A fair bit weren't mutants anyway," Marius said, speaking as one who knew. "Think it was a show of solidarity, or something. The closer to baseline human, more creative the getup."

"One of the things you ought to look at, along those lines, is the fan base for mutant athletes who are 'out of the closet'," Nathan said. "Their outward shows of support, if you're following me..."

"Public reception an' that? Yeah, that could work." Marius pulled one foot onto the couch and leaned back against the arm again. "Must be a bit shite at times, though. Like, you're a bloke who can make milk sour an' all you want to do is play ball, an' suddenly you're bein' held up as an example for your species. No pressure, eh?"

"Accidental role models. There's a long list of precedents for that. The real question is who thrives on the accident and who gets caught up in resenting it?" Marius seemed to be relaxing. That was good.

Marius grunted. "I'll see what I can find on that. World's still a bit lacking in the out-in-sport department, but I got a few names. Might as well make some calls."

"Wait to do that until after you've read these articles on interviewing methodology I have for you, all right?" Nathan said, turning towards the door. "Not that you didn't do well with the initial interviews, but something like that's going to be more tricky. Can't hurt to have some polished strategy in case you run into resistance. Sometimes you can get more out of people than they intend to give."

The boy grinned. "Couldn't hurt, but no worries. I can be very persuasive." He turned back to the television. "I'll do the reading before next time."

Interesting conversation, all around, the analytical part of Nathan's mind registered. He definitely needed to broach the subject of Marius with Moira, see what she thought.

"I'll send you the references," Nathan said, continuing towards the door. "And I was serious, by the way, about the bonus marks."

Marius patted his sweatshirt pocket reassuringly. "I'll keep it in mind. Somethin' to think on, right?"

"That's the goal," Nathan said as he departed. "Ask Forge sometime about how stubborn I am when it comes to making you think."

The boy smirked. "Fair enough. Ask Forge sometime how stubborn I am when it comes to bein' stubborn."