Prom: Marie and Amanda take a break
May. 26th, 2006 09:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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xp_logsAmanda's having a cigarette when Marie joins her outside. They catch up and Amanda (inadvertantly) makes Marie cry. Gah.
If she stayed outside smoking much longer, Angelo would come looking for her. Again. Or, worse still, Marie-Ange, who was more than willing to use her cards to make sure Amanda didn't flee the whole scene. As it was, it wasn't as awful as she'd thought, just... nerve-wracking. Probably more for her than for everyone else. Taking another drag on her cigarette, Amanda promised herself she'd go back in once she'd finished this one.
Almost probably.
Rogue could only handle watching the couples inside dance for so long without a break or she risked sending herself into a deep depression. She hadn't realized that attending prom was going to be so difficult...the whole getting dressed and ready had been fun, but a night of watching everyone do things she could only do in her dreams was painful. Walking outside, she had expected to be alone and was surprised to realize that she wasn't. She was even more surprised when she recognized Amanda.
Movement caught the corner of her eye and Amanda turned to see Marie coming out. She smiled, the expression sneaking out before her brain had a chance to catch up - she'd always liked Marie, even had some amount of hero-worship for the older girl who had it so very hard and yet still continued on. It had made the state she'd been in after the love potion all the worse to bear. "Thinking about cutting and running too?" she asked, reminding herself that time had passed. Let Marie set the pace, she reminded herself.
Marie responded with a relieved smile. "Ah thought Ah was the only one." After a brief moment of indecisiveness, she walked over to stand closer to Amanda. "Its been a long time…how have you been?" she said quietly, unsure of where things stood with them.
She had been mad at Amanda when she left…but during her time in Canada, she had realized that Amanda hadn't done anything with malicious intent, just as Doug hadn't. That whole stupid love potion situation was just one huge blunder. And as Dr. Youngmen was fond of saying, 'Whenever you feel anger towards another, look inside yourself to find what you are truly angry at.'
"Well, if we just ignore last year entirely, I've been good," Amanda replied with a wry grin. She took the last drag of her cigarette and crushed it out, tossing the butt in the ashtray provided. "Keeping busy, which is the main thing. Angelo told me you were back. You look... well, actually you look really good. How're you finding things back at the school?"
"Ah am good," she said firmly. "But the school is confusing, to say the least…a lot of people Ah knew have moved on, someone Ah thought was dead is back and there's a whole gaggle of new folk running around that Ah'm still learning to keep straight," Marie said with a wry grin. "Of course, there are plenty of familiar faces too…but things changed a lot while Ah was gone and Ah'm still adjusting to that."
"That's Xavier's for you, never a dull moment." Amanda gave Marie a sympathetic look. "Still, the biggest trouble magnets have either left or grown up - Sarah went off to Japan with Shinobi, Angelo's got the whole suit and tie gig going on and me... well, I'm not there either. Working in the city now, with the Snow Valley think tank."
"Ah think being a trouble magnet is one of the entry requirement for Xavier's, y' know?" Marie said while staring at the stars. Moving her focus back to Amanda's face, she continued, "But Ah did so enjoy teasing Angelo about the suit…kid cleans up rather nice, huh? And sounds like you aren't doing too bad for yourself either."
The Brit shrugged a little. "I'm trying. I fucked up well and truly last year, but somehow I managed to get myself another chance, so I'm not wasting it." She added, for Marie's sake. "Long story, full of angst and drama, like mine usually are. But yeah, I'm finding my feet with things in New York, working with the Trenchcoat Brigade, learning a lot... If I'd known being responsible was this fun I would have done it ages ago."
Marie felt sorry for Amanda… trouble just seemed to be unnaturally attracted to her. And Amanda deserved better, but then again didn't they all? "So did a trenchcoat come along with that gig or do they make you buy your own?" she teased.
"Still waiting on it - I'm the apprentice." Amanda chuckled a little. "Actually most of what I get to do is books and research. Marie-Ange talks about getting me a tweed jacket and a pair of glasses to polish." Tilting her head slightly, she looked at Marie consideringly. "So, what're you up to? Teaching or studying? Or a bit of both?"
"Ah can see that…Professor Sefton, Indiana Jones style," she said with a wink. "Ah'm all about keeping busy too. The Professor wrote me a really great rec and along with a very creative essay about how Ah can understand what its like to be someone else, Ah got into a combined bachelors and masters program at Pace for psyc. An' Ah'll be doing a little teaching, yoga and whatever's needed."
"You're going to college? That's brilliant!" Amanda beamed - Marie had longed for that for all the brief time they'd known each other. "I'm so glad for you, mate." The British endearment slipped out without her noticing.
A broad grin quickly overtook Marie's face. "You're the first person Ah've told," she admitted. "Except for the Prof of course. Ah'm still afraid it's some kinda crazy dream and that the next thing Ah know someone will pinch me and Ah'll wake up."
A shy, pleased blush touched Amanda's cheeks briefly and she reached over and carefully touched the back of Marie's gloved hand. "If anyone deserves the break, you do," she said warmly.
"Thanks," Marie said sincerely. "It'll be nice to do something normal for a change." Well as normal as possible for me. "Ah just hope Ah remember how to study…its been a while since Ah took a class that wasn't, um, in the field so to speak."
Switching the focus of the conversation to Amanda, Marie continued, "So this think-tank thing - it's a good fit for you?"
"Seems to be so far," she replied. "There's a lot I can do even without the magic and I'm learning heaps. Going in for school too as part of the whole training thing - Ms. Frost sorted out this thing where I get the degree first so there's something on paper for the official types, but I do all the work for it now. Sociology, mostly, with a couple of languages on the side to keep me in practice."
"So now Ah know who to call for some late night cramming," Marie said with a smile. "Ah'm proud of you…sounds like pieces are finally falling into place for you…at least in the work 'n education realm." Cautiously, she queried further, "Anything going on in other arenas?"
"Um." It probably wasn't eloquent, but it tended to be Amanda's reaction to questions, even hinted ones, about her personal life these days. "Manuel and I... well, it ended badly. Actually, it ended bloody horribly and it was mostly my fault - that drama of mine last year. Since then... well, I've been putting myself back together. That relationship probably wasn't the best for either of us. Not that I need to tell the budding shrink that, I suppose," she added dryly.
Marie reached out and gently squeezed her shoulder. "Ah'm not one to judge other's relationships…Ah haven't always made the best decisions myself," she said with a rueful smile. "Experience is the best teacher and as long as you learned from the situation…" she said, trailing off at the end.
Amanda smiled gratefully at the contact. "I just get so knotted up when I think about him," she admitted. "I'm worried about where he is and what he's doing, but I'm so bloody mad at him at the same time for being so... Manuel. He never learned anything in the end, and it's just so frustrating. Then there's the part where I ripped the link out of our heads, so I don't really have the right to judge him at all. I just hope he's all right, wherever he is." She said the last softly, more to the sky than to Marie, before turning and asking: "How about you? Saw Logan at the brownstone, he mentioned you weren't still...?"
"Just friends. He's still my best friend, but things are never going to be that way between us again," she replied with a smile. Funny how comfortable things had gotten between her and Logan now…it was almost like old times again, especially since her birthday. Her tone suddenly became more serious, dropping to an almost incomprehensible level. "It's not right for me to be with anyone, y' know? Not fair to them. Ah wish Ah could just get close to someone…but you know what happens when Ah do. Just isn't in the cards for me."
The pain in Marie's voice was plain and Amanda's heart ached for her. But this wasn't something that could be fixed by trite words. So instead Amanda reached out again and took Marie's hand, squeezing it gently through the glove. "If you ever need a break from the madhouse," she said at last. "Give me a bell. I've got this huge fucking apartment and just me to fill it up. And there's a decent pizza place that delivers, so you wouldn't have to eat my cooking."
Marie groaned internally. She hadn't meant to bring the conversation down. Forcing a smile became easier with the contact… people got so used to not touching her, that they tended to avoid it even with the proper precautions. Touch was something she craved, even if there had to be a layer of silk obscuring it. "Ah'm definitely gonna have to take you up on that."
"I'll be all offended if you don't," Amanda told her, teasingly. Glancing towards the door as she caught sight of movement again, she caught sight of Angelo looking at the pair of them worriedly. "I was wondering how much longer he was going to give me. You ready to face the whole prom experience again? You can borrow Angelo - he's really good about you stepping on his toes when you dance."
"You go on ahead," Marie said in a falsely pleasant tone. She wasn't quite ready to face the crowd inside, but didn't want to keep Amanda from enjoying herself. "Ah still need a little more fresh air. Tell Angelo to save a dance for me, Ah'll collect it later."
Amanda wasn't fooled - she'd done the same thing herself many a time - but she wasn't going to push Marie on it. She understood the need for space. Giving her hand another squeeze before letting go, all she said was: "Catch you later. It was great catching up again."
Marie watched wistfully as Amanda returned to the prom, before turning to stare at the night sky. It wouldn't do for anyone to see the tears streaming silently down her face. Let them enjoy their night.
If she stayed outside smoking much longer, Angelo would come looking for her. Again. Or, worse still, Marie-Ange, who was more than willing to use her cards to make sure Amanda didn't flee the whole scene. As it was, it wasn't as awful as she'd thought, just... nerve-wracking. Probably more for her than for everyone else. Taking another drag on her cigarette, Amanda promised herself she'd go back in once she'd finished this one.
Almost probably.
Rogue could only handle watching the couples inside dance for so long without a break or she risked sending herself into a deep depression. She hadn't realized that attending prom was going to be so difficult...the whole getting dressed and ready had been fun, but a night of watching everyone do things she could only do in her dreams was painful. Walking outside, she had expected to be alone and was surprised to realize that she wasn't. She was even more surprised when she recognized Amanda.
Movement caught the corner of her eye and Amanda turned to see Marie coming out. She smiled, the expression sneaking out before her brain had a chance to catch up - she'd always liked Marie, even had some amount of hero-worship for the older girl who had it so very hard and yet still continued on. It had made the state she'd been in after the love potion all the worse to bear. "Thinking about cutting and running too?" she asked, reminding herself that time had passed. Let Marie set the pace, she reminded herself.
Marie responded with a relieved smile. "Ah thought Ah was the only one." After a brief moment of indecisiveness, she walked over to stand closer to Amanda. "Its been a long time…how have you been?" she said quietly, unsure of where things stood with them.
She had been mad at Amanda when she left…but during her time in Canada, she had realized that Amanda hadn't done anything with malicious intent, just as Doug hadn't. That whole stupid love potion situation was just one huge blunder. And as Dr. Youngmen was fond of saying, 'Whenever you feel anger towards another, look inside yourself to find what you are truly angry at.'
"Well, if we just ignore last year entirely, I've been good," Amanda replied with a wry grin. She took the last drag of her cigarette and crushed it out, tossing the butt in the ashtray provided. "Keeping busy, which is the main thing. Angelo told me you were back. You look... well, actually you look really good. How're you finding things back at the school?"
"Ah am good," she said firmly. "But the school is confusing, to say the least…a lot of people Ah knew have moved on, someone Ah thought was dead is back and there's a whole gaggle of new folk running around that Ah'm still learning to keep straight," Marie said with a wry grin. "Of course, there are plenty of familiar faces too…but things changed a lot while Ah was gone and Ah'm still adjusting to that."
"That's Xavier's for you, never a dull moment." Amanda gave Marie a sympathetic look. "Still, the biggest trouble magnets have either left or grown up - Sarah went off to Japan with Shinobi, Angelo's got the whole suit and tie gig going on and me... well, I'm not there either. Working in the city now, with the Snow Valley think tank."
"Ah think being a trouble magnet is one of the entry requirement for Xavier's, y' know?" Marie said while staring at the stars. Moving her focus back to Amanda's face, she continued, "But Ah did so enjoy teasing Angelo about the suit…kid cleans up rather nice, huh? And sounds like you aren't doing too bad for yourself either."
The Brit shrugged a little. "I'm trying. I fucked up well and truly last year, but somehow I managed to get myself another chance, so I'm not wasting it." She added, for Marie's sake. "Long story, full of angst and drama, like mine usually are. But yeah, I'm finding my feet with things in New York, working with the Trenchcoat Brigade, learning a lot... If I'd known being responsible was this fun I would have done it ages ago."
Marie felt sorry for Amanda… trouble just seemed to be unnaturally attracted to her. And Amanda deserved better, but then again didn't they all? "So did a trenchcoat come along with that gig or do they make you buy your own?" she teased.
"Still waiting on it - I'm the apprentice." Amanda chuckled a little. "Actually most of what I get to do is books and research. Marie-Ange talks about getting me a tweed jacket and a pair of glasses to polish." Tilting her head slightly, she looked at Marie consideringly. "So, what're you up to? Teaching or studying? Or a bit of both?"
"Ah can see that…Professor Sefton, Indiana Jones style," she said with a wink. "Ah'm all about keeping busy too. The Professor wrote me a really great rec and along with a very creative essay about how Ah can understand what its like to be someone else, Ah got into a combined bachelors and masters program at Pace for psyc. An' Ah'll be doing a little teaching, yoga and whatever's needed."
"You're going to college? That's brilliant!" Amanda beamed - Marie had longed for that for all the brief time they'd known each other. "I'm so glad for you, mate." The British endearment slipped out without her noticing.
A broad grin quickly overtook Marie's face. "You're the first person Ah've told," she admitted. "Except for the Prof of course. Ah'm still afraid it's some kinda crazy dream and that the next thing Ah know someone will pinch me and Ah'll wake up."
A shy, pleased blush touched Amanda's cheeks briefly and she reached over and carefully touched the back of Marie's gloved hand. "If anyone deserves the break, you do," she said warmly.
"Thanks," Marie said sincerely. "It'll be nice to do something normal for a change." Well as normal as possible for me. "Ah just hope Ah remember how to study…its been a while since Ah took a class that wasn't, um, in the field so to speak."
Switching the focus of the conversation to Amanda, Marie continued, "So this think-tank thing - it's a good fit for you?"
"Seems to be so far," she replied. "There's a lot I can do even without the magic and I'm learning heaps. Going in for school too as part of the whole training thing - Ms. Frost sorted out this thing where I get the degree first so there's something on paper for the official types, but I do all the work for it now. Sociology, mostly, with a couple of languages on the side to keep me in practice."
"So now Ah know who to call for some late night cramming," Marie said with a smile. "Ah'm proud of you…sounds like pieces are finally falling into place for you…at least in the work 'n education realm." Cautiously, she queried further, "Anything going on in other arenas?"
"Um." It probably wasn't eloquent, but it tended to be Amanda's reaction to questions, even hinted ones, about her personal life these days. "Manuel and I... well, it ended badly. Actually, it ended bloody horribly and it was mostly my fault - that drama of mine last year. Since then... well, I've been putting myself back together. That relationship probably wasn't the best for either of us. Not that I need to tell the budding shrink that, I suppose," she added dryly.
Marie reached out and gently squeezed her shoulder. "Ah'm not one to judge other's relationships…Ah haven't always made the best decisions myself," she said with a rueful smile. "Experience is the best teacher and as long as you learned from the situation…" she said, trailing off at the end.
Amanda smiled gratefully at the contact. "I just get so knotted up when I think about him," she admitted. "I'm worried about where he is and what he's doing, but I'm so bloody mad at him at the same time for being so... Manuel. He never learned anything in the end, and it's just so frustrating. Then there's the part where I ripped the link out of our heads, so I don't really have the right to judge him at all. I just hope he's all right, wherever he is." She said the last softly, more to the sky than to Marie, before turning and asking: "How about you? Saw Logan at the brownstone, he mentioned you weren't still...?"
"Just friends. He's still my best friend, but things are never going to be that way between us again," she replied with a smile. Funny how comfortable things had gotten between her and Logan now…it was almost like old times again, especially since her birthday. Her tone suddenly became more serious, dropping to an almost incomprehensible level. "It's not right for me to be with anyone, y' know? Not fair to them. Ah wish Ah could just get close to someone…but you know what happens when Ah do. Just isn't in the cards for me."
The pain in Marie's voice was plain and Amanda's heart ached for her. But this wasn't something that could be fixed by trite words. So instead Amanda reached out again and took Marie's hand, squeezing it gently through the glove. "If you ever need a break from the madhouse," she said at last. "Give me a bell. I've got this huge fucking apartment and just me to fill it up. And there's a decent pizza place that delivers, so you wouldn't have to eat my cooking."
Marie groaned internally. She hadn't meant to bring the conversation down. Forcing a smile became easier with the contact… people got so used to not touching her, that they tended to avoid it even with the proper precautions. Touch was something she craved, even if there had to be a layer of silk obscuring it. "Ah'm definitely gonna have to take you up on that."
"I'll be all offended if you don't," Amanda told her, teasingly. Glancing towards the door as she caught sight of movement again, she caught sight of Angelo looking at the pair of them worriedly. "I was wondering how much longer he was going to give me. You ready to face the whole prom experience again? You can borrow Angelo - he's really good about you stepping on his toes when you dance."
"You go on ahead," Marie said in a falsely pleasant tone. She wasn't quite ready to face the crowd inside, but didn't want to keep Amanda from enjoying herself. "Ah still need a little more fresh air. Tell Angelo to save a dance for me, Ah'll collect it later."
Amanda wasn't fooled - she'd done the same thing herself many a time - but she wasn't going to push Marie on it. She understood the need for space. Giving her hand another squeeze before letting go, all she said was: "Catch you later. It was great catching up again."
Marie watched wistfully as Amanda returned to the prom, before turning to stare at the night sky. It wouldn't do for anyone to see the tears streaming silently down her face. Let them enjoy their night.
