AIM conversation between Jamie and Guido, Saturday night

[x-crowdofone.livejournal.com]

Session Start (AIM - betterthanskippy:CarouselGuy): Sat Dec 20 22:57:12 2003

CarouselGuy: YOU!

betterthanskippy: Hey, Guido. How's every little thing?

CarouselGuy: YOU SMUG LITTLE WEASEL, I'M GOING TO RIP YOUR PUNY LITTLE HEAD OFF YOUR SCRAWNY LITTLE NECK AND FEED IT TO YOU! "REALLY GOOD SOURCE" MY ASS!

betterthanskippy: Y'know, first of all, it's good to see that you're watching CNN. So many college students these days get their current events from bad sitcoms. It's tragic, really.
betterthanskippy: And you have kind of a logical problem there. How're you supposed to feed me my head when you just ripped my mouth off my body?

CarouselGuy: I'd find a way.

betterthanskippy: Not if you don't want my music teacher mad at you, you won't. She likes me. :)

CarouselGuy: Yeah, I got that from the part where she let you back her up on the drums on national television and Sasha died of jealousy.
CarouselGuy: She says you suck, by the way. And she's trying to figure out if you can make voodoo dolls out of those little Russian nested things her grandma sends her every year.

betterthanskippy: Sasha's your drummer, right? You might just want to casually mention I've only been playing for six months or so, y'know, just to tick her off a little more.

CarouselGuy: I don't want a drumstick jammed in my ear, thanks.
CarouselGuy: Six months, huh? You're pretty good, then.

betterthanskippy: Thanks. I practice a lot.
betterthanskippy: So, hey, what'd you think of the rest of the show?

CarouselGuy: Very cool. That Professor Xavier guy, man, he's like Dr. King meets Obi-Wan Kenobi. Only motorized. Gave everybody around here a lot to think about.

betterthanskippy: Heh. You should try having class with him. And I wish I knew how he did his thing where he makes a joke, and you have to go back and think about it to realize he's teasing you, and he gets extra laughs while you do that. Or extra amused smiles, anyway, he's got the best deadpan I've ever seen.

CarouselGuy: Well, he's got Serious Voice. Nobody expects you to be cracking jokes in Serious Voice.

betterthanskippy: That's true.

CarouselGuy: Man, I can't believe you were actually part of that whole "mystery mutants save the day" thing during the hurricane. I have screenshots from the news footage on my freaking walls.
CarouselGuy: And what was that about, anyway? You didn't think I'd be cool with you being a mutant, I had to find out when you got interviewed for TV?

betterthanskippy: Well, it was . . . the hurricane thing, we had to do that, I mean, we could help.
betterthanskippy: And I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I wasn't really telling anybody. I mean, it isn't something you really bring up in casual conversation.

CarouselGuy: National television, on the other hand . . .

betterthanskippy: Well, if you're going to do something, you might as well do it big.

CarouselGuy: Too right. Hey, speaking of my framed screenshots, is that green-haired chick single? She's cute.

CarouselGuy: Jamie?

CarouselGuy: Kansas? Hellooooo . . .

betterthanskippy: She's, um, no, she's seeing somebody.

CarouselGuy: You OK?

betterthanskippy: Yeah, I'm fine, I was getting something to drink.

CarouselGuy: Oh, no problem. So what's your thing, then? Blow things up, turn into a rabbit, piss beer, what?

betterthanskippy: Piss beer? That's disgusting.

CarouselGuy: You'd get an invite to every frat party in town, though.

betterthanskippy: And this is a good thing?

CarouselGuy: Only if you like drunken idiots.

betterthanskippy: I think I'll pass.
betterthanskippy: Anyway, I clone myself. Kind of like that one Smallville episode with the guy from Home Improvement, only faster, less disgusting, and not evil.

CarouselGuy: Heh. Congratulations to your girlfriend.

betterthanskippy: Oh, don't even start, gutter-brain.

CarouselGuy: Bet you she's thought about it. :)

betterthanskippy: That's for me to know and you . . . not to know.

CarouselGuy: Good. Ambiguity is better for the imagination. ;)

betterthanskippy: Argh.

CarouselGuy: Seriously, though, while I'm ragging on you for not telling me stuff . . . you should know, I'm one too.

betterthanskippy: One what?

CarouselGuy: A mutant.

betterthanskippy: Oh, okay.

CarouselGuy: Thank you, Anticlimax Man.

betterthanskippy: Xerox Boy, actually. And come on, I live in an entire school full of mutants and that was a pretty damn huge "growth spurt."

CarouselGuy: Well, it was a growth spurt. It just wasn't hormone-related.

betterthanskippy: So what happened? I mean, you're what, twenty-two, twenty-three? I got mine when I was twelve.

CarouselGuy: Well, aren't we special.
CarouselGuy: I dunno exactly. What happened was, I was spending the week at my aunt and uncle's because hey, who studies for finals anyway? Except that was the week of the Excedrin commercial heard round the world.

betterthanskippy: I think I see where this is going.

CarouselGuy: Not unless you're seeing me get hit by a bus. :)

betterthanskippy: I have to admit, that was not what I was thinking. A bus?

CarouselGuy: Yeah. I was just picking myself up off the street from my headache when this bus driver got his, dropped the wheel, and boom. Next thing I know, I wake up looking like King Kong after a course of steroids, if King Kong was devastatingly handsome.

betterthanskippy: How did that not make the news?

CarouselGuy: Oh, I paid people off like no tomorrow, basically. And the big story was the headaches anyway; wasn't that hard. And the cheerleaders dig the new bod, so it's all good.

betterthanskippy: Cool beans.
betterthanskippy: Hey, look, it's been great talking to you, but I'm seeing RotK tomorrow with my girlfriend and I want to make sure I'm rested. Catch you later?

CarouselGuy: Oh, hell yes. I was in line for that movie at 7:30 Wednesday morning-you're gonna absolutely love it, man. Slip your girlfriend some tongue from me.

betterthanskippy: I'm pretty sure that's the most disturbing request I've ever seen.

CarouselGuy: Just looking out for your best interest, man. ;)

betterthanskippy: Tell you what, I'll tell Ms. Blaire you said hi. Close enough?

CarouselGuy: Slip her some tongue from me?

betterthanskippy: And now you're just delusional. Night, Guido.

CarouselGuy: Night. :)

*** You have been disconnected. Sat Dec 20 23:37:53 2003.

Comments

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

*bizarredly amused* There's a Sasha, who's a drummer.

I don't think there's an end to my amusement, actually. ;)

[x-crowdofone.livejournal.com]

We'll chalk that up to weird mutant coincidences. I was just strapped for a name and happened to like that one. :)

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

I like it too, obviously. *grins* Yeah, it's one of those Great Minds think alike things going on..

...

[x-tarot.livejournal.com]

KMFDM has a member named Sasha, who I believe is either the female vocalist, or the male vocalist/keyboard and synth player.

[x-shinobi.livejournal.com]

So when's Guido get a player, huh?

Wait, don't tell me: on the day someone can find a picture of somebody that huge, with those sunglasses, and that hair-cut, right?

*cries!*

[x-crowdofone.livejournal.com]

And shortly after Artie and Miles do, most likely. Guido's slated to stay an NPC for the foreseeable future. :)