Scott and Ororo, Tuesday afternoon

[x-cyclops.livejournal.com]

The headmaster and the headmistress have a meeting, but the conversation quickly turns very personal.


Ororo shuffled her papers distractedly - she had welcomed the routine and familiarity of the responsibility when she returned, but lately she had trouble keeping focused on work. Still, that wasn't any reason to shirk her duties, and she was hoping that an administrator-ly meeting with Scott would be enough to set her back on track. With classes winding up before the winter break, it was a good time to start planning and prepping for the next semester.

"Hi, 'Ro," Scott said as he came in, his arms full of his own paperwork. "Is there any coffee?" He offered her a quick smile as he sat down.

"I believe there is a little left, yes," she said, nodding towards the corner of the room. "Though I cannot vouch for its freshness... you must attempt that at your own risk."

"Feeling better?" he asked, getting up to go pour himself a cup. "You look a little less like someone who's counting her bruises."

'Ro smiled and nodded, uncapping her pen and tapping the nib against the pad of paper in front of her. "Yes, I feel much better, thank you. I was planning on heading to the Danger Room in the next day or two to test that out."

"You and I should run something together," Scott said, sitting back down. "It's been a while, and I'd like your opinion on my performance." He offered her a lopsided smile.

"I would be thrilled to do just that. After we get through this," 'Ro said, gesturing to the list of items she had drawn up.

"Ah, yes, the bureaucracy." Scott leaned over, looking at the list. "Jean was talking to me about maybe taking a couple of the science courses next term," he said absently.

At this Ororo paused, the briefest of hesitations before she nodded again. "If that is what she wants," she said neutrally.

Scott actually froze, and was silent for a long moment. "You know," he said, "I was too busy being thrilled that she was back, and then being angry with people who weren't happy - or were too happy - that she was back..." He looked up at her, a bit diffidently. "Are you okay?"

"Of course. I am fine." She tried to give him a reassuring smile. It mostly worked. "I am glad she has returned as well."

Scott sighed, leaning back in his chair. "Really."

He didn't need her insecurities and hang-ups... he had had enough problems lately. This was supposed to be a happy time. Still, they were nothing if not honest with one another. Taking a deep breath, 'Ro looked down at her paper, an expression of great concentration on her face. "It has just been so long. And things have... changed. And I cannot help but feel it is unfair for her to come back now, when she should not have left in the first place." There. It was out.

"You know, 'Ro..." Scott's voice was a bit unsteady as he looked down at the table, picking up one of the pens and flipping it around in his fingers. "The thought of what she and I could have done to hurt each other had we tried to handle our own problems on top of our relationship problems these last few months isn't really a palatable one."

"I know. I know. It is silly, to feel this way," she said, shaking her head. "And you made the right decision. Both of you. Please, do not think I am judging you for this. I have no right."

Scott shook his head at her. "No, don't brush it off like that," he said. "Seriously. You're too important to me, 'Ro - to both of us, and neither Jean nor I are going to be able to sit back and pretend not to notice that you've got some ambiguous feelings." His expression was oddly tentative, and he looked away. "You said it's unfair for her to come back now... I'm not sure I understand. Would you rather she hadn't at all?"

"No," she said quickly, a look of panic crossing her face. "No, Scott, that is not what I meant at all. I am glad she has returned, truly. It is only that I wish she had been here for you when you needed her, instead of leaving and causing more pain. You say that it was for the best, but I was here, I saw what you went through. I cannot believe that her absence was easier to bear than whatever problems her presence might've presented."

Scott looked back at that, and there was a suspicious brightness in his real eye as he mustered up an oddly uncertain smile. "Ororo, you know..." He stopped, cleared his throat, and then went on a little more steadily. "In case I hadn't been... explicit enough about this, I... I would never have made it through the last few months without you. If you hadn't been there." He took a deep breath and straightened slightly in his chair. "You gave me space when I needed it and support when I needed it, and I would not be here, wondering when I should make it official that I'm back on active duty, feeling like myself again for the first time in months, if it wasn't for you. Jean... wasn't there," he said, his voice faltering for a moment, "and that's something she and I are going to have to live with, despite all the good reasons why it was that way."

"Oh, Scott." There wasn't anything else she could say at that moment - at least not if she didn't want to betray the sudden emotion that gripped her. Ororo ducked her head, looking down at the smattering of dots scattered across the legal pad in front of her. "I was not trying to say... I did not mean that I am better for having been here. But you are my best friend, Scott, and it is only natural that I will rail against the things that hurt you. I do understand the reasons why Jean left. And I am not angry at her any more. But all the same, I cannot banish those memories of the past few months just like that, because she has returned. But I promise you," she said, looking up at him again, "I promise I will. Because you are both my friends, and I am happy that she is back for you now."

"Okay. I mean, I know that we can't just snap our fingers and... banish things," he said, sticking to her choice of words, "and I wouldn't ask you to even if you could." His smile was a little more genuine, if still crooked.

"Technically we could ask Charles..."

"He wouldn't even lecture us, you know. He'd just give us the 'you know better and yes, terribly amusing joke, children' look." Scott couldn't help a laugh. "You know, if we hadn't known he was bald before we came along..."

"I am sure every generation thinks the same thing, and rightly so," Ororo said, smiling more widely now. The atmosphere in the room certainly felt lighter now, and she let out a deep breath. "Thank you, Scott, for not holding this against me. I suppose it is only another example of why I am not fit for a normal relationship."

Scott choked on his initial reply, then gave her a narrow-eyed look. "Oh, and Jean and I have anything approaching a normal relationship?" he asked, deadpan. "Your problem is that the man who deserves you hasn't come along yet, that's all. And yes, I know that could be taken in a number of different ways... I only meant it in the good ones."

Ororo grinned ruefully. "Perhaps we ought to go to Nathan for relationship advice. Despite his otherwise self-destructive tendencies, he seems have figured out the whole 'personal life' thing well enough."

"Nathan, hell. We should both go talk to Moira," Scott said in amusement, but made a mental note to remember what she'd said. He wasn't sure what he could do about it, of course, but if Ororo seriously thought she was anything less than a Jean-level catch, as a woman, something needed to be done. "Not only did she catch him, but she house-trained him."

"That is true. I can only imagine the amount of newspapers that entailed... it is a good thing the Professor subscribes to just about every one on the planet."