xp_logs | (no subject)

Alex comes to see Lorna during her office hours. Alot of stuff is said, not all of it is meant. Alex comes out of it feeling a bit better, Lorna not so much.

Lorna checked the clock on the wall and decided to stay a little bit longer. She'd hinted that there would be a pop quiz Monday and was sort of hoping that at least a couple of students would pick up on it and come by her office to chat. The class had a tendency to be unfocused and nothing worked better as a wake up call than a 'this will be on the test' quiz. Failure was a powerful motivator. But an hour and ten minutes into her office hour, not a single student had wandered through her door. It was a little depressing. On the other hand, it was quiet and she was getting her paperwork done, so it wasn't a total loss. Stifling a yawn, she pulled the ponytail holder from her hair and leaned back in her chair, finger-brushing her hair.

There was a knock on the door, but to Lorna's dismay, on many levels, it wasn't a student come a-calling in hopes to save their grade. Alex poked his head in, bottom lip being thoroughly worried in his teeth. He'd already been outside her door for about twenty minutes talking himself into this so there was no backing out now. "Hi. Can I come in?"

She sat up quickly, "Alex, uh...hey, yeah." She looked down at her desk, shuffled papers uselessly and glanced up at the clock again. "Have a seat. I'm, uh, just finishing up my office hour. I don't suppose there are any lurking out there?" Lorna looked everywhere but him. She hadn't been this nervous in his presence for...well, three and a half years, really.

"Students? No, just me." Alex said as he came and sat down in the chair in front of her desk, looking more at his hands then at her, just as nervous as her. "Look, if this is a bad time I can find you later..."

Would taking the reprieve just make her look like a coward? Would it be because she was being a coward? Lorna rubbed at her temple, "No, it's okay. Now's fine. I've got some time before...some time. What do you need?" Before nothing at all. Before going up to her room and doing some reading ahead for her classes because there was nothing else to do.

It would make them both cowards because Alex already thought of himself as one for not coming to her sooner. "I wanted to talk to you about, well, me and Shiro." Before she could answer, he quickly launched into his apology. "I'm so sorry. I wanted to tell you, but I was ...shit I was afraid. But I never wanted you to find out like that."

Lorna shrugged one shoulder, "Hey, it was none of my business. You're free to date whoever you want to and at least I know Shiro's more likely to do damage to himself than you."

Alex gave her an unamused look. "Lorna, I know things have been...weird since," you left, "last winter between us, but I'd like to think that we're still good friends. You still didn't deserve to find out that way."

Lorna opened her mouth to say something, stopped, shook her head and sat back in her chair with a sigh. "What am I supposed to say, Alex? How am I supposed to react? As long as you're happy with him, what right do I have to say anything about this? Sure we can be friends but how much does that matter when your boyfriend hates me? Is it really worth rocking the boat there with him?"

"This isn't about Shiro. It's about you and me." He sighed, not sure how to say what he wanted. He wanted her to be happy, that was it really. Because he still loved her and if he couldn't make her happy, then he wanted her to find someone who would. "And I don't care what he thinks about you. I care about you Lorna and I care about what you think. I...care about how you feel, okay?"

"I don't really feel any particular way about it, Alex." Lorna didn't think he'd believe that any more than she did herself but that wasn't the point. Drawing the line was--here is where they could talk about this, no further. "I'll never get in the way of you being with someone who makes you happy. If Shiro makes you happy, then great. I don't want to make this harder on any of us. It's an insane situation already." She looked down at her hands, covered her left with her right, "In the interests of full disclosure, I, uh, have a date myself." She didn't. "So, you know, don't worry about me."

Alex visibly sighed with relief and smiled. "Good. I'm glad Lorna. I only want you to be happy...it's what I've always wanted for you." He ignored the earlier statement, not believing it, but they could address it later. He stood up and came around so he could give a friendly kiss on the cheek. "Don't be a stranger okay? I meant it when I said I want to be your friend. And don't listen to Shiro, he's...overprotective at times but he means well."

She stiffened when he kissed her, closed her eyes so that she wouldn't see and forced a smile. "Oh, I don't blame him. You get yourself into too much trouble for people not to overreact."

Alex just chuckled. "Don't I know it. But I'm changing that, I promise." He walked over to the door and leaned on it slightly after he opened it. "I'm serious. Don't be a stranger. See ya later Lorna." And he left, feeling slightly better about everything.