xp_logs | Workers' Revolt - Amanda, Wanda

Having been locked out of her office, Wanda gets a visit from her most unrepentant assistant.

A loud burst of foreign cursing caught the attention of the coffee drinkers around Wanda for a second before fading away into disinterest again. The baristas had gotten used to that nearly right when she started and the newcomers in soon learned to ignore it. She poked at the keyboard of her laptop in irritation before taking a near scalding sip of her tea. She was irritated and covered in glitter from the booby-trapped office.

If she listened carefully enough, she could hear the veins in her forehead popping.

Amanda peeked in through the front window, trying to gauge just how pissed off Wanda was. Considering the older woman was covered in glitter - Mark's idea, she'd swear on her life, honest! - "a lot" didn't begin to cover it. Still, Amanda believed very much in seeing the funny side of things when it wasn't her on the end of the practical joke, so she took her life in her hands and pulled open the door, approaching Wanda's table and cheerfully saying: "Wow, it looks like the Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies in here. Our security system worked well, then?"

"I swear to God I am going to rub this muffin here on my now incredibly sparkly and colorful skin and put it somewhere uncomfortable," Wanda said slowly, shaking the muffin at the person who was supposed to be her minion. There was a decent shortage of minions these days. "And I do not mean in the back of a Volkswagen."

"Hey, I'm not the one who's such a workaholic they had to be locked out of her office and the lock booby-trapped so she didn't cheat," Amanda pointed out, poking her tongue out at Wanda. "Can I sit down, or do you need to put that muffin on the chair first?" she added, with one of her patently cute expressions. She batted her eyelashes to make sure.

There was a heavy pause before the older woman sighed and put her muffin back down on her plate. "Sadly, that would be a perfectly good waste of a free muffin. It's simply amazing how much free food you receive when you end up sitting at a coffee shop, covered in glitter and muttering to yourself." Wanda gave Amanda a look. "I do not cheat and never mind what my brother might say about that. When have you known me to cheat?"

"Every time we spar?" Amanda replied with a grin, taking the seat, amused at the expressions of the customers around them. "Fuck, you've pretty much had this lot terrorised all morning, haven't you?"

"There might be a slim chance that someone ended up in the trash bin," she replied as serenly as one could considering the conditions. "Did you realize how much mass those things can actually hold if you really try?"

"At a guess, I'd say at least one snarky businessman?" Amanda leaned back in her chair, trying to catch the eye of the waitstaff so she could order lunch - she had work to get back to, after all. "Tell the truth, Boss Lady. You missed me."

One of the less frightened baristas grabbed a menu from the side and started to make her way to the table. "Oh, no missing, honestly. Of course, if Illyana happens to tell you that I dressed a mop up in a blonde wig and had it speak with a British accent, please remember to tell her it's simply an odd kink of mine." Wanda grinned at her. "As if missing you was in any doubt."

"You, bosslady, are a very strange woman. I think I left you alone with the scary filing too long." Amanda gave Wanda a critical look. "Actually, I know I did. You'll all pointy face. You only get that when you haven't been eating properly. Admit it, you've been living off donuts and coffee the whole time I've been gone, haven't you?" She shook her finger at Wanda, mock-severely. "What is it you told me before I left? 'Don't worry about me, I'll be fine, you just go and have lots of sex with that boyfriend of yours'."

There was a very brief attempt at looking scandalized before she gave up. "Well, if there was sex mentioned, then I certainly said it. And I'll have you know I survived on more than coffee and donuts...one day, I'm fairly positive there was Chinese takeout. Now that might have been because I stole someone's leftovers but there was takeout. And beer. Never, ever forget the beer because there's a poor sober person somewher in China, you have to remember this."

"As if Pete would ever let me leave beer behind." Amanda shook her head at Wanda, in mock despair. "I swear, you're going to end up getting us invaded by Angelo's army of small girls, armed with casseroles and then where will all our scary reputation be, huh?"

"Now that is a frightening thought," Wanda responded, pointing her tea at Amanda in fright. "The last thing I need is someone else trying to get me to eat. Next thing I know, Doug'll have programmed reminders into my computer's calender and he knows I can't get those things turned off." Her look turned into a glare. "And you are not to take any ideas from that, young lady."

The waitress reappeared, heartened perhaps by the lack of swearing, and Amanda ordered a sandwich and a Coke. "Would I do something like that?" she asked, eyes wide. "I'm hurt you'd even think I'd go behind your back and do something for your own good, I really am."

"I'm covered in glitter and every time I inhale, it is kind of like choking on a small fairy," came the dry response. "I think the answer to that is yes, yes, dear God in heaven yes. I thought I was supposed to be the nosy one in this relationship."

"Learned from the best," came the unrepentant response. Propping her elbows on a non-glittery part of the table, Amanda rested her chin on the back of her hands. She was wearing short sleeves, her wrists exposed. "Fuck, I missed this. Don't get me wrong, the holiday was brilliant, but I'm glad to be back here. The only better thing would be if I'd been able to take you with me, like Doug and Angie, but then there would have been sea monsters or something to deal with."

"You make it sound as if I encourage trouble," Wanda teased, smile growing wider. "I've missed you as well and, honestly, I would have gone if I could have. If I was anyone else, I say I might have cramped your style but, really, this is me so that was not even remotely possible. Trust me, I made the mop you very sexy looking indeed. I think the broom asked her out."

The waitress bringing Amanda's lunch made a strangled sort of noise, like she was swallowing a giggle, and Amanda snickered. "Oh, I meant the lot of you. The whole office, relocated to the beach. Grumpy Cajun and all." She said it lightly, but worry creased her brow. "But there's some kind of unwritten rule that we can't get together anywhere but the pub without something weird happening, so it's probably best you didn't. And I've got to say, I was wondering why the broom handle had my red lipstick on it."

"Oh, yes. Had the entire office actually been down there, North Carolina would have been invaded by mutated sushi looking for revenge. Though, that might have been interesting. The first one to eat their weight in our opponents doesn't have to pay for their drinks at the victory party." Wanda grimaced. "And see, I knew I should never have left the broom and mop together. Now they're going to produce a mass amount of little sponges and how will I ever explain this to Pete?"

"From the wrong end of a straightjacket?" Amanda suggested, before biting into her sandwich and rendering herself incapable of speech.

"Is there a right end?"

"Sure there is - the end that isn't open towards you." Amanda took a swig of her Coke and gave Wanda another of those impish grins. It faded, however, as she made herself be serious, for a short while, at least. "Fun as this is... How is everyone, after all the shite that went down? Doug and Angie seemed at the end of their ropes, and I know Remy's off the rails in a big way."

"The problem with our office," Wanda replied softly, reaching up to wipe glitter out of her eyes, "is that sometimes it's hard to tell when we are overworked and stressed because we are always like that. Except this time. It was pretty obvious that we were all not exactly in the good place, as they say. To be honest, I've barely seen the others, which is a sign in it's self. All of us are working incredibly too hard."

"On stuff we can't do a thing about, like this Attilan thing, which isn't helping." Amanda bit into her sandwich again, a smaller bite this time, and chewed thoughtfully before speaking again. "We need a job," she pronounced at last. "Something we can do, that doesn't involve rescuing anyone, or chasing our tails looking for clues that aren't there, or scrambling to catch up with the bad guys. Something nice and non-traumatic, that'll remind us that we're bloody good at what we do." She wrinkled her nose. "But stuff like that doesn't just fall out of the sky, unfortunately."

"If wishes were fishes and all of that," Wanda agreed, breaking her muffin apart carefully in an attempt to avoid getting any more glitter on it. "You're right, we really are chasing our tails here. Roadblock after roadblock and each as frustrating as the last. If there was something we could do to turn our luck around, I would not be adverse to doing that."

"Well, we're still working on our network..." Amanda paused. "We are still working on that, right? You and Illyana didn't go and finish setting things up while I was gone?" She sounded almost worried for a moment. Having Illyana join the Trenchcoats was one thing. Being replaced by her was entirely another.

"There was progress on it but it's nowhere near finished," she responded gently but firmly, giving her a look. "It will take all three of us working on it to finish it completely and even once that has happened, we will always be getting in new additions. But the network is going to be an incredibly large help—is a large help, even in it's unfinished state, really."

Amanda blushed a little, and gave Wanda a relieved grin. "We could try shaking that a bit, see if anything falls out?" she suggested. "And when Doug gets back, see if we can't find something out of his newsfeeds? I know Remy has his own stuff going on, but that's not something he wants any of us involved in." Not that Amanda wanted him involved either, but she was still trying to think of a way to get through to him. Their last conversation hadn't been exactly productive. Maybe she should sic Ororo onto him...

"There's always something out there," Wanda agreed, "and it has been a while since we've gone to find trouble instead of the other way around. I think being proactive right now would help everyone tremendously. Even if we do not actually find anything, getting some of us out of the ruts we're in right now would be very helpful."

"And there's always the theraputic violence," Amanda pointed out. "Like kicking the cat, only less prone to getting the ASPCA coming after you."

Wanda nodded. "And there is nothing more frightening than a rightfully angry ASPCA officer first thing in the morning. Except for us, first thing in the morning, without enough caffeine, of course. It's the only way to survive waking up at the hours that I do, really."

"All hail the mighty caffeine gods, for they truly own our souls," Amanda intoned, and then broke into giggles. "Okay, apparently going on holiday makes me hyper. And a bit more odd than usual. She tilted her head at Wanda. "Mind you, sitting here with the Great Glittery Fairy of Snow Valley isn't exactly normal. That stuff really does stick, doesn't it?"

“Come here, I’ll show you how much it sticks!” Wanda suddenly lunged across the table at Amanda, much to the younger woman’s squeaks of protests and amusement at the crazy people from the coffee house.