Ororo and Scott | Monday evening

[x-storm.livejournal.com]

Scott finds Ororo brooding in the greenhouse about the repercussions of her time in New Orleans. It seems turnabout is fair play, however, as he talks her out of moping and gets her to commit to sticking out her responsibilities, powers or not.

Ororo was sitting in her greenhouse. It was like picking at a scab, in a way - the one place that normally felt so vibrant, so alive to her now felt as dead and dull as everywhere else. She couldn't help but poke at the rawness, though, ostensibly under the auspice that it would help her accept things faster. Or drive me crazy.

Since arriving back at the mansion she had comported herself rather well, she thought. Though there had been more than a few questions directed at her once her involvement with the events in New Orleans (or lack thereof) had been revealed, she had kept a good face on and soldiered through. There hadn't been any question about returning to the mansion; though powerless, she wasn't stupid. This was her home, and though she felt like she stuck out like a sore thumb she wasn't going to turn her back on everything she had worked for. It remained to be seen where exactly her place was, though, now that she was back. A question which, at a time like this, made her thump her forehead against the frosted glass window in despair.

"I'm sensing a reversal of roles here," came Scott's voice from somewhere behind her. He appeared from down one aisle of greenery, pushing aside the reaching branch of a flowering plant gently. "Except wait... you hid in the greenhouse long before I ever picked up the
idea."

Pulling back from the window, Ororo turned to glance over her shoulder at her approaching friend. "You had to learn it from someone, after all," she offered with a half-smile, moving over on the bench to make room for him.

"Funny," he said, sitting down, "I seem to remember coming up here to find you a few times you were bemoaning something you'd done in relation to the man in your life. Of course, those times it was usually too much peach schnapps or creating fog inside the back seat of a car at a bad moment..."

"And those were things I actually regretted. This thing I don't regret at all, but I still wish it had never happened..." Scott had of course received the curt 'going to New Orleans to stop a hurricane' phone call, though Ororo hadn't stayed on the line long enough to hear his inevitable questioning of her sanity. And he had gotten the equally short, though not intentionally so, phone call to inform him that she was returning to the mansion with her life intact but her powers significantly less so.

Scott gazed out at the flowers, his hands folded lightly in his lap and his expression still. "So I'm assuming you were probably waiting for me to ask this question," he said after a moment. "I guess I'll do it and get it over with. Why did you go alone?" He shook his head
suddenly, before she could even begin to formulate an answer. "I know you went with Remy's people. But when it comes right down to it, you went without us. Into a situation you knew had a good chance of killing you."

She had been waiting for the question, and had even prepared an answer for it. This didn't make it any easier to explain, however, she found as she began. "There was nothing that you could have done," she said slowly. "Remy's team had their objectives, and what I had to do, noone else could have helped with."

"There was nothing I could have done on the beach in San Diego, either. That didn't mean that I left Jean and Nathan and Jim standing there alone." Scott shook his head again, this time more slowly. "I could be more practical and point out how much certain members of our team could have maybe helped, but... there doesn't seem to be much point to having this discussion." His smile was brief, and tighter than it normally was. "I do however fully understand - now - why people were so upset with me back in March. Then again, I seem to
remember you weren't one of those people. Which makes me reflect yet again on our shared dysfunctions."

"Some might call it the Xavier's Selfless Syndrome," Ororo quipped, though she sobered a moment later as she shifted to lean against Scott, one hand coming to rest on his forearm. "It was hard enough, Scott, going in knowing I might not come back. Or Remy, or Wanda, or any of the others. If I had to face the idea that you or Jean or Nathan might not make it..." She trailed off, sure that she didn't need to finish that sentence.

"Ah, yes." Wry tone or not, he put a hand over hers where it rested on his arm. "I could quote Jean, on that particular attitude. I suspect I won't need to quote her, though, so I'll save you that." Scott was silent again for a moment, then leaned his head against hers. "I hate to be repetitive," he said, more quietly.

"You do not need to. I do not intend to do anything so foolish again... nor could I if I ever wanted to." Her voice grew a little thicker, but she swallowed past the lump in her throat and forged ahead. "It is gone, Scott, all of it. I cannot alter a rainshower, I cannot feel any of it."

"It's gone right now," Scott pointed out, his voice still soft. "It might be gone for good. Or six months. Or a week. You pushed too far and burned out. It doesn't mean that it's permanent." He straightened finally, but only so that he could look at her. She wasn't meeting his eyes, though. "You know that. We've seen burnout before."

"Yes." Of course they had. In their careers they had seen just about everything that could happen to a mutant who regularly put their life on the line in order to stop some catastrophe or other. Truly I have gotten off easy. It wasn't much consolation, however, to her
when the world felt dull to her senses. "I know." She made herself look up and meet his gaze. "I know. And you are right. It is all a matter of adjustment. Which just takes time."

"And that was very nice and platitude-ish," Scott said, sliding an arm around her shoulders. "You almost sounded like you believed it."

"I am hoping that if I say it enough, eventually it will come true."

"Well," Scott said more briskly, not removing his arm from around her, "I hope you don't think this lets you off the hook in terms of our shared curse. I mean, job." He glanced down at her, the corner of his mouth tugging upwards slightly, one eyebrow raised in challenge. "I
mean, there's nothing wrong with that wonderful devious brain of yours, is there?"

Ororo opened her mouth to offer excuses, but once look at Scott reminded her that he was about as likely to accept 'I can't do it' as he had accepted 'I had to' as a reason for going in the first place. "I hope not," she said finally, shaking her head. "Since it is all I
have left."

He gave her a little shake. "Bullshit. But I don't want you thinking you can't do it just because you don't have your powers right now. You didn't let Nathan away with thinking he was useless without his powers, if I remember correctly..."

"Nathan also has years of field experience and training," she pointed out, just to be stubborn.

"And you haven't? Maybe not as many, but was I imagining this stubborn white-haired person doing all of the various leaderly things I've been doing for the last several years? She was a figment of my imagination?"

Ororo couldn't help it; she cracked a smile, and nudged Scott with her shoulder. "You have taken quite a few blows to the head. I would not be surprised if you have daily hallucinations. Even ones as dutiful as those."

"I have a healthy fantasy life. Let's not get into that." He removed his arm from around her shoulders, but only to take her hand and squeeze it. "If you need the time off, take the time off," he said, more quietly. "But don't take it off because you think you can't do the job without your powers. That's all I'm saying. There's more to who you are and what you do than the ability to create lightning on cue."

With a sigh, she grudgingly nodded, not-so-secretly grateful that Scott was there to talk sense at her. Not that she doubted he would, but it was nice to have it said all the same. "I foresee a lot of tea with Charles in my future - and I do not even need powers for that."

"I've got a better idea, right now," Scott said, rising - and not letting go of her hand. "How about I buy you a beer? It's similar to tea, except more fun." He offered her a crooked grin.

"More fun than tea?" she asked, standing as well. "I think you have a deal."

Comments

[x-rahne.livejournal.com]

This was really good.