xp_logs | Yvette & Leo log

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Backdated to Tuesday. Post Red-X therapy session for Yvette with Dr. Samson.

Usually Yvette's knock on the door was a cautious, barely-audible tap, but today it was louder, almost an actual rap. The face that peered around the door was brighter, eyes glowing brilliantly. "Good morning, Dr. Samson," she almost chirped at him. "It is the time for our session, yes?"

Leo smiled at the young woman standing in the doorway, and then made a show of looking through the pile of papers on his desk. "If you say it is, Yvette, then it is. I do have a clock in here, but I seem to have filed it away. Please, come in and sit down."

She giggled and came in, moving to her usual seat in the slightly-battered armchair by the desk. Crouching in it with her long toes hanging over the edge, she tilted her head at him. "Did you have the good weekend, Dr. Samson?" she asked him brightly.

"I did indeed, relaxing and informative," he replied. "A lecture at NYU on new SSRI's," he continued, almost to himself as he stood and sat in the large chair across from Yvette, leaning against the high back and steepling his hands together. "But I believe you have far more interesting things to discuss than improvements in serotonin reuptake inhibitors--how was Canada?"

"Far more exciting that it was supposed to be being," she admitted. "But that is the field trip curse, no?" She didn't seem particularly upset, however. "I was having my first Red X mission, to be helping people in the avalanche."

"For Xavier's, yes," Leo replied dryly. "My childhood field trips rarely contained dinosaurs. So--the first excursion." He smiled. "I did see the news, so I know the mission was successful--how do you feel you were?"

Yvette nodded emphatically, her enthusiasm reflecting in the face her skin had softened to the point dimples were appearing as she smiled. "Oh yes," she said. "I was using my powers to be helping dig the people out of the snow and to be clearing the roads. It was feeling good, to be useful." And not just dangerous, was the unspoken addendum.

Leo nodded in return. "You felt your powers were a force for something positive. That's wonderful. Did you interact with the people you were helping? How did they respond to you?"

"They were frightened, so I had to be talking to them, to tell them they would be safe." Yvette remembered the scene in the house with Kevin, where she had had to take charge where the older boy was too withdrawn to. "It was strange, Dr. Samson. When I was there, doing the helping, I was not so shy." She ducked her head a little. "There was a Beta Flight man who was very strange and rude, and I did not say sorry to be making the hole in his jacket by accident."

"If you had made the hole on purpose due to his rudeness, I would be concerned, Yvette," Leo said with a smile, "but accidents happen, to all of us. When one is involved in rescue situations, things are often rushed and intense--I've made more than one hole in a labcoat by sticking a pen through forcefully."

He paused for a moment, thinking. "Why do you think you weren't shy when helping the people there? What was it about that situation that was different than the mansion?"

"He did not wait for me to explain about my skin, and so his jacket got the hole. But I do not think he even did notice." Yvette fell quiet for a few moments, obviously thinking. "I think," she began slowly. "Was that it was because... they needed the help. My help. There was not the time to be shy. There was the more important work to be doing."

"And the important work that you did," Leo said, smiling. "You did not retreat, or withdraw, you came forward and used your strengths to help others. That's wonderful, Yvette. I'm very happy for you, I'm very proud of you, and I am sure that the people you helped are very grateful as well."

Leo leaned forward, unfolding his hands and resting them on the arms of the chair. "I'd like you to try something for me--I'd like you to take a moment and remember what it felt like on that mountain. Remember being 'not shy', remember when you had to tell the people that they would be safe--what did that feel like to you? Have you felt that way before, here at the mansion?"

Yvette began to shake her head, and then stopped. "I am not sure..." she began, hesitantly. "Many of the times, I am the one who is told to be safe, who the people think is needing the help." She fiddled with the cuff of one glove. "I think, perhaps, that it was maybe when I was telling Kyle and Jay that Tommy was my friend, even if he was the FOH before and did bad things. But that was more because I was being angry."

"We can work with angry," Leo said, grinning. "Remember--anger is an emotion just as valid as any other, and sometimes it can be a good tool. Being angry means you are not hiding, not being quiet, and I'm a fan of Yvette not being quiet, remember?"

He leaned back in his chair, and spoke a little more seriously. "I would like you to reflect on how it felt to help the people on the Red X mission--one of the 'homework' assignments I'm going to give you before you leave is an exercise to record in your journal for a week at least one time a day that you felt confident about, something you didn't feel shy about. I'm also going to ask you to read the booklet on assertiveness again--you don't have to do the exercises, but read it again."

Leo gazed out the window for a moment, thinking. "Yvette, I have another question for you. What did you think about the people in the avalanche? The people that needed help--from you. You said they were scared and frightened--did that make them weak?"

She shook her head. "No. They could not be doing anything to stop the avalanche, and they did not have the powers to be saving themselves. But it is not weak to not be having powers."

"Then, is it weak to have powers, but still need help?" Leo returned.

A slightly uncomfortable pause, and then: "Perhaps. If you are having the powers, you should be able to protect yourself. The X-Men, they do not need to be saved. They are the people who make the saving."

Leo nodded and considered this for a moment. "The X-Men are the people who do the saving, you're correct. Does that mean they never need help? When Professor Xavier travels to places that are not handicapped accessible, he often requires significant assistance for tasks of daily living. Does that make him weak?"

"No..." Yvette drew the word out reluctantly. "But..." She bit her lip a little. "He is not the X-Man either. Sometimes it is seeming that if you are not the X-Man and using the powers to save the people, you are the person who is needing to be saved and that is all."

"The person needing to be saved..." Leo thought about this for a moment. "Let's look at this a little differently. The people you helped save from the avalanche--they were people needing to be saved, correct? Is that all they were? Once they have been saved, once you had helped them--what were they then? Did they have lives before the avalanche? Did they have families, jobs?"

Yvette watched him, blank glowing eyes unreadable. "I think I am understanding," she admitted. "But, Dr. Samson, when I am here, I am not the X-Man. I am not the person doing the saving. And it is seeming like I am not..." she spread her long-fingered hands. "It is seeming that I am the person to be protected and told what to do. Since she is the trainee, Laurie is very much doing this, and it is not seeming like she is wanting to be my friend any more."

"So, I think we have two issues, that are closely related--let's look at them, shall we?" Leo replied, with a slight smile. "One--you are concerned that Laurie is not your friend as much as she was previously. And two--you felt different on the mission with Red X than here at the mansion. Do you think Laurie is responding to your difference, or are you responding differently to Laurie?

"Before Laurie was the trainee, we were, how you say... equal. We are the friends, and helping each other. But when she became the trainee, it was changing. She does not talk to me as the friend, but like the mother, or the teacher, or like I am the small child. We had the fight about it and she was getting better, but only a little." Yvette sighed, sounding frustrated. "And I think it is that I am not the same as I was. I am not so frightened and shy, and Laurie does not understand this."

"Change is always difficult, Yvette," Leo responded, smiling gently. "No matter what form it takes. Would it not be a shock to you to walk into school one day and find Ororo with bright blue hair? But if this change of hair was Ms. Munroe's decision, we would become used to it, in time. Changes in attitude and personality take time to adjust to, as much as physical changes do."

Leo leaned forward again and met Yvette's eyes. "And you are changing, Yvette. As you said, you are not so frightened or shy, and you gaining more strength and confidence in who you are." Leo leaned back and looked away for a moment, thinking. "Laurie is changing as well--as you have noticed. You are not equal--she may perceive that her status as a trainee grants her authority. So both of you now have to adjust to a change. You are recognizing that Laurie has changed--how do you think you can help Laurie understand that you have changed as well?"

"To talk to her, I am thinking," Yvette said, but a little resignedly. Laurie could be particularly hard to get through to when she was convinced she was right. "And maybe... to be showing her I am not the same, by changing the things I do? To learn the English better, so I am not sounding like the child?"

Leo nodded. "Yvette, learning to speak English better is an excellent goal, and I support you in that--but you must make that goal for yourself, not for anyone else. Talking to Laurie is also an excellent plan, but again, I don't want you to focus on changing the things you do to show Laurie you are not the same. I want you to change the things you do because you do not wish to be the same--believe me, Laurie will notice."

Leo ran a hand through his hair absently, thinking. "When you talk with Laurie, I would talk with her about the Red X mission, talk about how it felt to help the people on that mountain--let her see this new part of you that's beginning to emerge."

Grinning, Leo leaned forward again, "Do you think this will be enough to work on for next time? If not, I can probably think of a few more things you could work on..."

"I think I have the plenty of homework, Dr. Samson," Yvette said, with a wry smile in return. "And I will be thinking very much about what we are talking about." She flexed her toes, wriggling them in their protective socks slightly. "It will be helping, I think."

"Excellent," Leo responded, smiling. "As always, I would like you to use your journal to record any thoughts you have after the session. I think Tamika already has you down for next week--so I'll see you then?"

"Yes. And thank you, Dr. Samson. I like to be talking to you." Yvette got to her feet and extended her hand for him to shake, a new gesture for her that was more telling than all her words about the changes she was going through. "To be seeing you next week."

Leo grasped Yvette's hand calmly to shake it, "I quite enjoy talking to you as well, Yvette. I'll see you next week--take care, now."