Scott and Jennie, Thursday afternoon

[x-cyclops.livejournal.com]

Scott stops in to visit one of his injured team members.


Jennie was starting to discover why so many people hated the infirmary. It was boring as hell, and when the painkillers started to wear off, it became hard to sleep. Jennie would prefer to be asleep, and sleep through the next few days. Simply so she didn't have to think anymore. She curled up on her side and hugged her pillow, and old comfort gesture left over from childhood.

"So how does it feel?" was the quiet question from the doorway as Scott stopped and watched her for a moment before coming the rest of the way into the room. "Coming back from the dead, I mean..."

"Hurts," Jennie mumbled, shifting on her back so she could get a look at Scott. "A lot." She held the pillow to her chest to draw comfort from it's closeness. "Did you really think I was dead?" Was anyone going to look for me?

"We thought it was a good possibility," Scott said quietly, throat slightly tighter than it had been a moment before. "I'm awfully glad we were wrong. I had you on the list, you know. People to look for, once we got in there... and then Fury and Cooper showed up and turned everything upside down."

"Yeah, I know, needs of the many and all that," she felt a little cold. If she had died, how long would it have taken for her body to be found? If it could have been found at all. She shook her head to clear it and sighed in relief that Scott wasn't a telepath and couldn't see what was going on in her head at that moment.

"I'm sorry," she said after a moment. "I panicked. Five-alarmer. I might have been able to, I dunno, not get blown up if I'd kept my head on straight. I might need more training."

Scott was quiet for a long moment. "I realize," he finally said, "that to some extent, you're all doomed to second-guess yourself for the simple fact that I had a hand in your training. But you have nothing to kick yourself about, and I'm not saying that just to make you feel better. You did what you could... you were alone, you had no back-up, and while yeah, I wish you hadn't gotten yourself blown up, as far as I'm concerned you have no business doing anything but holding your head high about how you handled yourself."

"It doesn't stop, does it?" Jennie said quietly. "It..She killed a lot of people in front of me. And I freaked. I know you say it doesn't do us any good to get angry. Just thought I had a cooler head, is all. I face down Nimrod and didn't freak out."

"This wasn't Nimrod," Scott said, his voice hoarse for a moment before he very firmly pushed his emotions down and away. Later. "It doesn't do us any good to get angry, no. But sometimes it happens."

"Right, yeah," Jennie said simply.

"The trick is to figure out how to use the anger, next time," Scott said. "But you can think about that later. Right now I think the priority's to rest and recuperate."

Jennie leaned back in her bed with a sigh. "Yeah, I'll try," she said quietly.

"Just... try to remember that you did good, all right?" Scott rose, leaning over and laying a hand on her shoulder for a moment, squeezing gently. "I'm proud of you," he said after a moment. "I'm proud of you, and I'm glad to have you on my team."

"Thanks," Jennie said, her voice breaking slightly. She put her head down in her pillow so he wouldn't see the weepiness that was threatening to overcome her. It was the drugs. Totally the drugs. It wouldn't do he any good to have her CO see her bawl. Pete probably totally doesn't have to put up with this She got herself under control and looked back up at Scott.

"Thanks," she said.