log: amara and lil

[x-volcanic.livejournal.com]

Back after their email exchange, Amara and Lil share a bottle of wine and talk a little about their pasts, Amara's lack of dating experience and Lil's marriage.

Pushing open the door to their suite, Lil smiled at Amara as she striped off her jacket and tossed it onto the couch. "Heya. I was out for a walk. Got a little pissed at someone earlier and the gym only took the edge off so I headed out and kinda got a little lost," the taller blonde explained then took a seat at the table in their kitchen area. "How you doing other than not studying?"

"I'm fine," Amara said with a smile. After the email conversation with Lil she'd pulled out the bottle of wine Lil had mentioned, and dug around for a couple of wine glasses. She'd been hoping to find something for them to nibble on, but no luck so far. At least something that would go with wine. "Is everything okay with you?"

"Yeah, it is. Just got some buttons pushed when I asked someone for advice but it's all good now." She watched the other woman with a quirked brow before it dawned on her that Amara had no reason to know where she'd put the wine glasses. "You want me to get the glasses? They're up top."

"Well, I'm glad it's okay now." Amara smiled in relief when Lil mentioned where the glasses were. "And it's cool, I should be able to get them." Amara wasn't that short, really. It's unlikely Lil had put them... no, wait. She couldn't quite reach them. "... actually maybe you should." Amara laughed a little at herself.

Chuckling, Lil slid out of her seat and reached up into the cabinet to grab two of the glasses then gave them a quick wash in the sink to get rid of any dust. "So, what were you supposed to be studying when I interrupted?' They'd get to the heavier subjects - Amara's live in Nova Roma, Lil's overnight guest - once the wine was open and poured.

"Math," she said with a wrinkle of her nose. "I'm not particularly good with it but I have to take it at some point. I figured I'd get it out of the way as quickly as possible." Especially when she was still deciding on what she wanted her major to be.

"Ugh. Numbers my head hurt," the Canadian declared as she dried off the glasses then set them on the table. Taking up the bottle, she yanked the cork out and proceeded to fill them both before folding herself back into the seat she'd claimed as her own. "So, what did you mean about your dad finding you someone to marry? We talking 'here's my daughter for three of your best milk cows' or what?"

"Yeah, mine too. I'm looking forward to this being over." And to when she can just focus on what she wants to study. Which will be classics or a language or literature, she's still not sure. "Oh, no, nothing like that." She took her glass of wine, taking a sip from it before she actually started to speak. "Not exactly. The place where I grew up, Nova Roma, it was... fairly isolated. And my father was one of the leaders. So when I was old enough, he would have found someone appropriate for me to marry."

Taking a sip of her own, Lil frowned over the rim at her suite-mate. "Appropriate how? Like the son of another leader or just the highest bidder?"

"Oh, nothing like the highest bidder situation. Most likely the son of one of the other leaders, confirm an alliance or something." She smiled a little bit. "Provided I liked him, of course, my father wouldn't have made me marry someone I didn't want to."

The taller blonde nodded once though she continued to frown. "That make sense and I'm glad he wouldn't have forced you into some loveless marriage. How old was 'old enough', like when would you have been considered old enough to marry whoever?"

"... well I was old enough before I left. Usually around 17-18, or at least that's when negotiations and things would start. Most of the friends I have left were all married when I went back last summer." Amara smiled a little sadly at that, taking a big gulp of her wine.

"I don't recommend a young marriage," Lil said, taking a long draw of her wine. "And that's from experience. I met Madison when I was sixteen and then got married a couple months after I turned twenty. Seventeen or eighteen? Waaaay too young. What's the divorce rate like in Nova Roma or doesn't it happen?"

"I think..." How to put this politely? Amara wasn't sure. "Nova Roman society was structured very differently. It was much more... community oriented. And so divorce didn't really happen." She looked down at her glass of wine. She wasn't going to mention the fact that part of the reason was because females in Nova Roma didn't always live long enough for there to be problems.

Lil's brow rose at that. "Community oriented? You mean swingers?" How did a girl as sheltered as Amara come from a culture like that?

"... what?!" Amara went bright red at that. "No no. Okay. I should probably explain what Nova Roma was. It was a small settlement, and we were completely isolated from everything. No computers or internet or phones, we were completely self-sufficient. We grew all our food, all of that. We were all we had, so... it was really in everyone's best interests for things to run smoothly, for families to stay together. We had our fair share of tragedy, of course, but... things like divorce were pretty unheard of."

"Oh." Lil bit her bottom lip the took a swig large enough to drain the rest of her glass which she promptly refilled. "Didn't mean to embarrass you. It just sounded like... But your explanation makes more sense." Much more sense given to how Amara was prone to blushing over the slightest innuendo. Definitely not the mark of a girl who'd grown up in a community who swapped wives. "Sounds nice, though. Not having to worry about families falling apart and stuff."

"No, no, it's fine." She finished off her glass as well, holding it out for Lil to refill. "Nova Roma was... unique." A ghost of a smile crossed her face. "If it hadn't have been for religion, it would have been perfect." She took a hurried sip of the wine, and promptly changed the subject. "So how are things with you and Bishop? They're going well, I take it?"

"I don't follow a religion so cheers to that," Lil said, clinking her glass against Amara's after refilling it for her. When the subject turned to Bishop, it was the taller woman's turn to blush though it was only a light rose that came to her cheeks. "Very well. I got cut at Harry's early so he came for drinks and rather than him driving all the way home, I offered him a spot here... and then in my drunken stupor, agreed to let him stay in my bed instead of making him sleep on the couch like I'd originally intended."

"Neither do I," she said firmly, her glass clinking against Lil's. It's not that she didn't believe in a higher power, she just... would not worship one. Not after her experiences with Selene. She smiled a little slyly at Lil at her last comment, taking a sip from her wine. "Is that what you intended?" Amara was trying to tease her suitemate, but... it wasn't something she did on a regular basis.

"What? Getting him into my bed?" Lil asked then shook her head, sending her ponytail dancing. "No. Definitely not. The main objective was to have a few drinks and fun at the bar and then come back here so he wouldn't have to drive for an hour back to the city. Him ending up in my bed was not in the plans... though, I can't say I was upset when the plans changed," she giggled and took a sip from her glass. "We didn't want to startle you when you woke up and found him on the couch. Neither of us considered you possibly being startled in the bathroom the following morning. We uh... we didn't wake you up, did we?" Lil bit her lower lip as she swirled her wine.

Amara giggled a little herself, her face staying slightly red as they had the conversation. The wine might be loosening her up a little bit, but that didn't mean she was used to have a conversation like this, one that hinted about sex and those sorts of shenanigans. "No no no, you didn't wake me up at all, it's fine, really. And it was my fault about the bathroom, I just wasn't thinking when I walked in. But Bishop was really nice and everything about it, you're pretty lucky with him."

"When he told me he ran into you in the bathroom, I was sure we woke you up," she laughed after another sip. "I mean, I tried to be quiet but my god, that man's hands..." Lil's eyes lit with impish delight. "I really do think I got lucky. I mean, I know it doesn't seem like it but we're trying to take it slow. We're not having sex," she clarified, "because neither of us wants to screw this up. He's looking for a relationship and I'm not ready for that yet 'cause of Maddy and all."

"Oh no, I'm always up early, I'm just awful before my first cup of coffee. I wasn't paying attention to all." It was probably a good thing Lil didn't usually get up early. Amara coloured again, hurriedly trying to cover it up with a sip of wine. "Oh, I didn't realise you weren't... oh, that sounds awful, I didn't mean it like.. it's a good thing you're taking it slowly then, I mean, I've heard that rebound things can be sort of messy and it would suck if that happened since you get along so well..." Oh god, just please, shut her up Lil.

Her first instinct was to snap and defend that his wasn't a 'rebound' thing but the brief annoyance faded when she realized the other girl was rambling. "It would suck," Lil agreed, killing her second glass. The wine was good for a cheap bottle. "And what we are doing isn't awful, I can assure you that," she added with a mischievous wink despite the fact that after the emails with Manuel, she wasn't quite sure what it was she and Bishop were doing. Lil was not looking forward to that conversation with the former cop the next day. "But I really will try to let you know if he's coming over again ahead of time."

Amara blushed again and giggled at Lil's wink, thankfully hiding behind her glass of wine. It's possible that Amara would get better with this whole sex-talk thing with Lil around, but she certainly wasn't there yet. "Well, that's good to hear. Because I'd hate for you to have to beat him up if he wasn't treating you right. Or for me to set him on fire." Because clearly that was the sensible way to go in a situation like this. "And really, it's okay. I mean, yeah I would like to know next time and everything, but it's okay that you didn't, really."

The taller blonde chuckled again and filled her glass for the third - and probably last - time. "I will let you know because we're roommates and I need to remember you live here, too. And for that, we're gonna take you out to dinner with a friend of his so you can have a conversation with Bishop that won't start or end in you turning as red as a tomato."

Amara shook her head at that, trying not to blush any more than she already had. "Really, it's not necessary at all. And I'm not entirely sure that taking me out for dinner with another person will solve the blushing problem." Amara was prone to blushing a lot, particularly around members of the opposite sex she didn't know very well.

"Think of it this way," Lil suggested, taking another sip. "Bishop and I are going to dinner and I'm bringing along a friend and so is he. Dinner with friends, not a double date which means there should be no blushing involved, right? Unless of course you like the guy and wanna flirt with him; I'm sure you could make him do some blushing of his own," she added with a wicked little grin.

"Dinner with friends is fine," she said with a little bit of a laugh, leaning over to pour the last of the wine into her glass. "And I wouldn't want to embarrass you or Bishop, I'm sure I'd make a terrible mess of flirting if I tried it. So I will just stick with being friendly." Which is something Amara was very good at!

"I'd suggest watching me and Bishop so you learn how to flirt but that probably wouldn't go well for any of us involved," Lil admitted, chuckling as she sipped her wine. "You just need some practice, I'm sure. You'll get it. And you're certainly hot enough just to smile and giggle and you'd have any guy tripping over himself to sit next to you, sweetie."

"... that could probably get dangerous, getting tips from you two." Amara grinned playfully. "And it's not usually attention from guys I have a problem with, it's just... the type of guys. They only really seemed to be interested in one thing, and..." She shrugged. "If I'm going to try dating someone, I want it to be someone who wants to spend time with me, not my breasts."

Lil snorted her amusement. "Definitely dangerous," she agreed. "While I agree with you about dating a guy who wants to spend time with you and not just your tits, take it from me, you do want a guy who wants to spend time with your tits, too. A man who knows how to use his hands is definitely a plus and you'll appreciate it. You'll find someone though, I'm sure of it. "

That was Amara's cue to start blushing again. "Maybe," she mumbled into her wine glass. "But I think if I did end up dating someone, it would be awhile before anything like that did happen." Amara liked the idea of taking things slowly... very slowly.

"Understandable. I made Maddy wait until we were engage to have sex," Lil admitted, giving her roomie a little shrug. "To each their own. Which is why I'm hoping my conversation with Bishop tomorrow goes well. I wanna make sure we're both on the same page with the 'no sex yet' rule for the same reasons." She reached out and gave Amara's hand a friendly pat. "You take it as slow as you need and don't let any guy talk you into anything more than you're ready for. But when you are ready for it, you're gonna love it."

Amara smiled and nodded, for once her blush starting to fade. "I'm sure once I find the right guy, it will all just... come naturally, I suppose." She took a sip of her wine, and then grinned a little mischievously. "Though I should probably start looking first, yes?"

"That's usually a good first step, yeah," the taller woman agreed. "Unless you're expecting a guy to topple into your lap during a training session or something. No eyes on anyone around the mansion?"

"No, not particularly," she said a little bit of a laugh. "Not that there aren't plenty of good-looking men around here, but there isn't really anyone that has caught my eye." She smirked at Lil. "Or at least no one that isn't taken already, Bishop is a very good-looking guy." She's just joking there, Lil, she wouldn't even consider looking at a guy that a friend of hers was involved with.

Lil's eyes lit impishly. "Just remember, I know where you sleep, sweetie," she joked. "And just because I'm not packing any bulging biceps and rippling abs like him doesn't mean I couldn't take you."

"Oh, I don't doubt that you could," Amara said with a laugh. "And I can't imagine that Bishop would want to look anywhere else when he has you." Lil was a pretty great girl! And Amara was fairly sure that Bishop was fairly fond of her.

"Sweetie, when you lose your man to a robot, you start imagining things," the taller blonde sighed then tossed back the rest of her drink to settle the swirl of emotion threatening to rise.

"Forgive me if it's not my place to say," she said with an understanding smile. "But I think the problem may have lay with your husband, not with you." Amara didn't want to say too much, since she didn't know all that much about Lil's marriage. But she couldn't imagine why anyone would rather spend time with a robot than a real person, especially when it was someone as warm and lively as Lil.

"Anyone who wants to put the blame on Maddy can have as much say as they want," Lil said with a dark chuckle. Yes, the majority of the problems stemmed from his issues but she wasn't naive enough to believe she didn't have a hand in any of it. "It just... didn't work for us. The Boxbot and other things; we were too young and too stupid and too stubborn."

Amara chuckled at that. "This is true... but it is difficult to try and establish and maintain a relationship when one person's focus isn't on the marriage. Especially when there are other problems."

"The other problems came first," she grumbled, wishing she had more wine. Or something stronger. "His tinkertoy was just his way of coping. There were... issues that couldn't be changed even when we tried." Her unhappiness in playing the perfect wife being one of them; cooking and cleaning didn't come easily to a woman who was used to breaking through cement walls.

Amara bit her lip, thinking for a moment. "I'm sorry to hear that." Amara found marital problems difficult to understand, if only because it was so unlikely for things to happen like that at home. She knew how a proper marriage was supposed to operate, at least proper from a Nova Roman point of view. "But at least you've actually finally called it quits? You can both move on, and find someone more suited."

One shoulder rose and fell absently. "Not your fault," Lil said softly with a wan smile. "And we haven't actually called it anything. I kinda just... left. Moved out, came here, haven't spoke to him since." Except for that one phone call on New Years that she'd rather forget. "We're still legally married."

"Really?" Amara raised an eyebrow at that. "You don't sound like you want to go back to him, though. Or that you're considering it." Especially now that she's seeing Bishop. That was not really something a woman who planned on staying married did. At least not in Amara's world.

"It's... complicated." It was the easiest way to define what was going on in her life. "There are some other issues that are kinda private but the biggest one is that what happened with the Boxbot might not be all Maddy's fault. I think it got into his head, like messed with it and that's part of what 'caused all the problems. If my leaving means he finally gets help like I told him to, I honestly don't know what'll happen; I've been in love with him since I was 16 and that's not something I can just make disappear. It's not fair to Bishop, I know, but that's why I'm trying to take things easy with him."

"Of course," Amara said with a nod. "But as you said... there were other issues before the... Boxbot?" She took a deep breath, and in the end, just shook her head. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be trying to offer you advice. Everything I know about marriage is how things worked in Nova Roma, how I remember my parents being before my mother died. But I hope, whatever you work out... that you choose whatever will make you the happiest."

"No, it's fine," she said with another shrug, staring into her empty wineglass. "Men are weird. They don't like being weaker or shorter or whatever else is supposed to go with being 'The Man' and because of my powers, Maddy was kinda threatened, I guess. That's why I quit Beta: so I could stay home and cook and clean and try to do all that stuff wives are 'supposed' to do. And it was okay for awhile but it wasn't something I was good at and when Maddy was phased into Box, he got what he wanted - to be all those fucking manly things. And he just started staying in that tin can longer and longer." Lil frowned, though the rest of her face turned stony. "I didn't have much of a model for marriage, really. Mom died when I was eight so... The whole situation just sucked all the way around."

Amara looked a little horrified at that. Not that she wouldn't have been that exact sort of wife, but trying to imagine Lil in that role... "I would have thought if he loved you, then he would love everything about you. And it's not entirely easy to miss how tall you are." She shook her head. "You are right, it does sound very complicated. But I can see why you wouldn't have been happy."

Lil gave a dry laugh and shook her head. "There's always something about the ones you love that you don't like and you love them in spite of it. Me being tall didn't break our marriage; we had other problems but we're also two very stubborn people who not only didn't like to admit we were wrong but also didn't wanna ask for help." Again her head rocked back and forth. "I'm making him sound like a complete ass, I know. He's not. I'm just a little biased," she sighed. "I shouldn't be boring you with all this shit. Valentine's Day is coming up and you don't need me putting you into a funk. I'm gonna head to bed."

"Oh, the fact that he's not around begging for you to come back to him makes him an ass," she said with a lopsided smile, trying to lighten the air after all of the serious conversation. "And I will be fine, just you don't go and get in a funk now, because I think you will have more reason to celebrate it than I am. I will be very sad if you and Bishop do not have a fantastic time." Amara pushed herself up off the couch, picking up the empty bottle of wine and taking Lil's glass from her. "You get some sleep. And I will see you in the morning."

"If it was anything like the other night, I'm sure it will be," Lil said, knocking the table to chase off any jinxes or bad luck. Likewise standing, she rolled her neck and gave a little stretch. "Thanks for listening to me bitch and I'd appreciate it if you didn't spread what I told you about Maddy. I don't like really talking about it..."

"Oh no, of course not. Anything you've said to me, I will take it to the grave." Amara didn't even like talking about her own issues, let alone someone elses. "And you are welcome to bitch at me anytime, I am happy to listen."

"Thanks, sweetie," the taller blonde replied with a sincere smile. "Appreciate it. I'm gonna go crash so good night and don't stay up to late with those numbers. They'll make your brains leak outta your ears." A little wave and Lil disappeared into her room.