Measuring love by the yardstick . . .
Feb. 6th, 2004 12:37 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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xp_logsAfter receiving this e-mail, Kitty goes looking for comfort, and finds it.
Kitty stared at the computer screen in shock. No... oh... An invasive shiver started at the base of her spine, creeping up until she was shaking all over - she didn't know how to deal with this. When she reflexivly sniffed she realized she was crying, and knew she had to get out of the room.
Her first instinct was to run: down to the labs, into a locked parlour, away from the mansion - anywhere to get away from that horrible message, but she quickly decided there was something, someone who would help more. She'd seen Jamie's away message and knew where he was, and slipping out of her room she raced as quitely as she could towards the library.
At one of the library computer terminals, Jamie popped a stiff vertebra and sat back, watching the credits roll. Obviously the Jedi Council had known what it was doing, sending him to save the galaxy. The only thing that would make this triumph more satisfying was . . .
The sound of footsteps made him turn around, and he had just enough time to think "somebody cute with amazingly good timing" before he noticed the tears streaking Kitty's face.
Kitty shouldn't be crying. That was high on his list of personal goals, Kitty not crying. A flick of his fingers turned the computer off--it'd complain on reboot, but there were more important things--and he got up out of his chair uncertainly.
"What's the matter, love? What can I do?"
Sniffing again, Kitty tossed herself into Jamie's arms. "My... *hiccup* parents... *sniffle*" It was far from the most coherent thing she'd ever said, but instead of clarrifying Kitty burried her head against Jamie's shoulder, still shaking.
He folded his arms around her, stroking her hair. "It's okay, sweetie, take your time, I've got you."
Slowly her body untensed in his arms, the shakes slowing and finally stopping. With a final shudder, Kitty lifted her head off of Jamie's shoulder. "I... I got an email from my *sniff* mother. Daddy moved out..." Another tear rolled unnoticed down her cheek.
Jamie froze for a moment, then pulled her closer, hoping his presence was enough to give the comfort his words almost certainly weren't going to be eloquent enough to manage. He stroked her cheek, wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, cursing the completely inadequate cliche. "Tell me how I can help you, Kitty, I'm--I'm kinda out of my depth here."
Leaning forward, Kitty kissed him softly, her mouth tasting of salt and tears. "Hold me..." was all she said, her eyes shutting as she burried her face again.
Jamie led her over to a chair big enough for both of them and nestled her across his lap, cradling her gently. "Whatever you need, I'm here," he murmured. "I'll always be here."
Shifting in his arms to settle more comfortably against him, Kitty had no response. Two weeks ago she'd probably have said the same thing about her parents. Instead, she simply tightened her arms around his neck, sighing softly.
Jamie sat for a while, just holding her, before he tried speaking again. "Would it help to talk about it?"
"I... probably." Her voice was very quite. "Mom said that daddy moved out a while ago. They... I was getting wierd emails, but they didn't tell me..."
"They didn't want to hurt you?"
"And not telling me for a month wasn't going to hurt?" Kitty sniffled. "My parents can be such idiots sometimes."
Jamie sighed and rested his cheek on her hair. "Wish I could fix it for you."
"I know..." Kitty rested her head against his chest, sniffling quietly again.
"I'm here for you, though, whatever you need, you know that, right? Whenever, whatever. I'm never going to be too busy and there's no bad time, and--if you want to talk, or yell, or cry, or just be held, I'm here." He paused. "I'm going to get you a yardstick."
"Thank you," she said, then looked up. "A yardstick?"
"Yeah. In case you wake up in the middle of the night. You can stick it through the wall to make sure Miles is on his side of the room, and then come through and either poke me awake with it or if you just want to fall asleep on me again, do that. I can make sure Doug and the kids won't mind."
"Oh..." Her voice was quiet as she thought about this, but then she lifted up her head and kissed him. "Thank you... Thank you so much for... For just being you."
He smiled tenderly. "I love you."
"I love you too." Her arms tightened around him as she kissed him again.
"Mm. We'll get through this, then."
Kitty nodded, slowly, almost hesitently. "Yes, I know...Eventually." It was almost whispered, but Jamie was close enough to hear it.
"Eventually," he agreed. "And while we're waiting for eventually . . . yardsticks."
Nodding, Kitty smiled faintly. "Yardsticks," she agreed. "And hugs, and tears..." She sounded resigned, but the tears had mostly dried, and no new ones were flowing.
"Those too. And it'll take a while. But we've got all the time you need."
Kitty sighed. "Can I take you up on that bed offer tonight?"
"Absolutely. I'll e-mail Doug in case I don't run into him, and explain to the kids--just that you got some bad news and you're very sad, so you'll be staying with me. Miles does the same thing with Alison, so I'm pretty sure they'll understand."
"Thank you," she said again. "Thank you so much."
He kissed her. "Nothing you don't deserve in spades."
"I don't know how I deserve you - you're too amazing. But I'm glad you think so."
"You brought me back from dying in my head every night. That's about as amazing as it gets. And anyway, love isn't about deserving, it just is."
Resting her head on his shoulder again, she couldn't help but smile at that. "Yes," she agreed, "it just is."
"So," he said, smiling back, "how about I knock on the wall when Miles falls asleep?"
Kitty nodded. "Yes, please."
"That's what I'll do, then. And I'll e-mail Doug as soon as I, y'know, feel like moving, so it may be a while, because I'm comfy."
"Yes, me too."
"Well, good, that was the idea."
E-mail to Doug
To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Madrox, Jamie
Subject: The extra lump you might notice in my bed tonight
Just in case I don't see you before we hit the hay--Kitty got some really, really, gigantically bad news tonight, and needs some extra comforting, so sometime after Miles goes to sleep she's gonna be coming through the wall and curling up with me for the night. This may happen every so often for a while. We're not going to do anything, y'know, indiscreet, just she'll feel better if I'm there. Just wanted to let you know, and if it's a problem we'll pack ourselves off to her parlor.
I dunno how public she wants the news to be, and I didn't ask about that before I sat down to write this, so I'm just gonna have to ask you to trust me on it being bad enough to rate something like this. I'm pitching it to the kids just that she's very sad and afraid and doesn't want to sleep alone, just like Miles goes to Alison when he feels like that, and I don't think it'll be a problem, and if the official-types get wind of it and start raising eyebrows, it's all on me. Grab me if we need to talk about it more. And thanks in advance.
Kitty stared at the computer screen in shock. No... oh... An invasive shiver started at the base of her spine, creeping up until she was shaking all over - she didn't know how to deal with this. When she reflexivly sniffed she realized she was crying, and knew she had to get out of the room.
Her first instinct was to run: down to the labs, into a locked parlour, away from the mansion - anywhere to get away from that horrible message, but she quickly decided there was something, someone who would help more. She'd seen Jamie's away message and knew where he was, and slipping out of her room she raced as quitely as she could towards the library.
At one of the library computer terminals, Jamie popped a stiff vertebra and sat back, watching the credits roll. Obviously the Jedi Council had known what it was doing, sending him to save the galaxy. The only thing that would make this triumph more satisfying was . . .
The sound of footsteps made him turn around, and he had just enough time to think "somebody cute with amazingly good timing" before he noticed the tears streaking Kitty's face.
Kitty shouldn't be crying. That was high on his list of personal goals, Kitty not crying. A flick of his fingers turned the computer off--it'd complain on reboot, but there were more important things--and he got up out of his chair uncertainly.
"What's the matter, love? What can I do?"
Sniffing again, Kitty tossed herself into Jamie's arms. "My... *hiccup* parents... *sniffle*" It was far from the most coherent thing she'd ever said, but instead of clarrifying Kitty burried her head against Jamie's shoulder, still shaking.
He folded his arms around her, stroking her hair. "It's okay, sweetie, take your time, I've got you."
Slowly her body untensed in his arms, the shakes slowing and finally stopping. With a final shudder, Kitty lifted her head off of Jamie's shoulder. "I... I got an email from my *sniff* mother. Daddy moved out..." Another tear rolled unnoticed down her cheek.
Jamie froze for a moment, then pulled her closer, hoping his presence was enough to give the comfort his words almost certainly weren't going to be eloquent enough to manage. He stroked her cheek, wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, cursing the completely inadequate cliche. "Tell me how I can help you, Kitty, I'm--I'm kinda out of my depth here."
Leaning forward, Kitty kissed him softly, her mouth tasting of salt and tears. "Hold me..." was all she said, her eyes shutting as she burried her face again.
Jamie led her over to a chair big enough for both of them and nestled her across his lap, cradling her gently. "Whatever you need, I'm here," he murmured. "I'll always be here."
Shifting in his arms to settle more comfortably against him, Kitty had no response. Two weeks ago she'd probably have said the same thing about her parents. Instead, she simply tightened her arms around his neck, sighing softly.
Jamie sat for a while, just holding her, before he tried speaking again. "Would it help to talk about it?"
"I... probably." Her voice was very quite. "Mom said that daddy moved out a while ago. They... I was getting wierd emails, but they didn't tell me..."
"They didn't want to hurt you?"
"And not telling me for a month wasn't going to hurt?" Kitty sniffled. "My parents can be such idiots sometimes."
Jamie sighed and rested his cheek on her hair. "Wish I could fix it for you."
"I know..." Kitty rested her head against his chest, sniffling quietly again.
"I'm here for you, though, whatever you need, you know that, right? Whenever, whatever. I'm never going to be too busy and there's no bad time, and--if you want to talk, or yell, or cry, or just be held, I'm here." He paused. "I'm going to get you a yardstick."
"Thank you," she said, then looked up. "A yardstick?"
"Yeah. In case you wake up in the middle of the night. You can stick it through the wall to make sure Miles is on his side of the room, and then come through and either poke me awake with it or if you just want to fall asleep on me again, do that. I can make sure Doug and the kids won't mind."
"Oh..." Her voice was quiet as she thought about this, but then she lifted up her head and kissed him. "Thank you... Thank you so much for... For just being you."
He smiled tenderly. "I love you."
"I love you too." Her arms tightened around him as she kissed him again.
"Mm. We'll get through this, then."
Kitty nodded, slowly, almost hesitently. "Yes, I know...Eventually." It was almost whispered, but Jamie was close enough to hear it.
"Eventually," he agreed. "And while we're waiting for eventually . . . yardsticks."
Nodding, Kitty smiled faintly. "Yardsticks," she agreed. "And hugs, and tears..." She sounded resigned, but the tears had mostly dried, and no new ones were flowing.
"Those too. And it'll take a while. But we've got all the time you need."
Kitty sighed. "Can I take you up on that bed offer tonight?"
"Absolutely. I'll e-mail Doug in case I don't run into him, and explain to the kids--just that you got some bad news and you're very sad, so you'll be staying with me. Miles does the same thing with Alison, so I'm pretty sure they'll understand."
"Thank you," she said again. "Thank you so much."
He kissed her. "Nothing you don't deserve in spades."
"I don't know how I deserve you - you're too amazing. But I'm glad you think so."
"You brought me back from dying in my head every night. That's about as amazing as it gets. And anyway, love isn't about deserving, it just is."
Resting her head on his shoulder again, she couldn't help but smile at that. "Yes," she agreed, "it just is."
"So," he said, smiling back, "how about I knock on the wall when Miles falls asleep?"
Kitty nodded. "Yes, please."
"That's what I'll do, then. And I'll e-mail Doug as soon as I, y'know, feel like moving, so it may be a while, because I'm comfy."
"Yes, me too."
"Well, good, that was the idea."
E-mail to Doug
To: Ramsey, Doug
From: Madrox, Jamie
Subject: The extra lump you might notice in my bed tonight
Just in case I don't see you before we hit the hay--Kitty got some really, really, gigantically bad news tonight, and needs some extra comforting, so sometime after Miles goes to sleep she's gonna be coming through the wall and curling up with me for the night. This may happen every so often for a while. We're not going to do anything, y'know, indiscreet, just she'll feel better if I'm there. Just wanted to let you know, and if it's a problem we'll pack ourselves off to her parlor.
I dunno how public she wants the news to be, and I didn't ask about that before I sat down to write this, so I'm just gonna have to ask you to trust me on it being bad enough to rate something like this. I'm pitching it to the kids just that she's very sad and afraid and doesn't want to sleep alone, just like Miles goes to Alison when he feels like that, and I don't think it'll be a problem, and if the official-types get wind of it and start raising eyebrows, it's all on me. Grab me if we need to talk about it more. And thanks in advance.
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Reply email to Jamie
Date: 2004-02-06 01:33 pm (UTC)Say no more, man. Whatever it is, it's your business and none of mine. Give Kitty a hug for me. And don't worry about it being a problem or anything like that. Whatever she needs, you give to her, bro.
-D
Return e-mail
Date: 2004-02-06 07:34 pm (UTC)