Two logs, early Thursday morning.

[x-coldhands.livejournal.com]

6:00 AM. Bobby tries to get revenge...and gets more than he was bargaining for.


Bobby crept down the hall toward Alison's suite. It was earlier than he was used to getting up, but it would be worth it. Alison would pay for setting him up like that.

He stopped in front of the wall that should be her bathroom, and listened. The hiss of water streaming through the pipes brought a wicked grin to his face and he pressed his palm to the wall, dropping the temperature around the pipes to near-freezing. And then waited for the screams.

Screams he got. He also got a bonus sound, the twisting snap of copper pipes and the cracking of plaster and tile. Lorna hadn't slept well the night before and was already cranky when she stumbled into the shower. The sudden introduction of sleet into her life had her reaction with every available sense to make it stop.

Well. That was ominous. Bobby took a step back, faintly alarmed--and collided with a warm, female body. He spun around, stammering an apology...and then went pale as a ghost.

Alison smiled at him cheerfully, clad in her jogging gear, cheeks still rosy from her morning's exertions. She raised an eyebrow, recognizing that particular shriek only too well, and tilted her head to look beyond Bobby and down the hallway. "Heya Bobby. What's going on?"

It didn't take Lorna long to realise that ice in her water was no failing of the plumbing or the water heater. "Drake!" Lorna flung open the door to the suite intent on blood. She'd only paused long enough to grab a towel and was still soaking wet with bits of ice and plaster clinging to her hair and skin.

Bobby looked in terror from Alison to Lorna. "Shit." With that, he did the only thing a real man could do in this situation--he ran.

Lorna clutched her towel tightly around her and eyed her roommate, "Ali, if you love me, you'll kill him for me." She sent her other sense ranging ahead and slammed every open door in the mansion simultaneously, effectively trapping him in the corridors.

With a whoop of glee, Alison turned and pelted after the fleeing Bobby, trying not to laugh out too loud at the state she'd just seen Lorna in. "Get back here Robert Drake, and take it like a man!"

Lorna turned, still seething, and stalked back into her room to find a robe. She checked the time and repressed a groan. This was why she never got up at 6 am. She needed a cup of coffee, another shower and Bobby's head on a platter. Preferably in that order. She hoped Alison caught him but just in case, Lorna made a mental note to call Cain and let him know what Bobby's prank had done to her suite's shower.
Meanwhile, Bobby pelted down the hallway, ignoring Alison's yell. "MARIE!" he yelled, stopping in front of her door and pounding desperately. No answer. And he'd wasted precious seconds in trying. Time to run again.

Not even bothering to look at the door, Alison ran on by after him, cackling evilly. "She's out ruuunninng!" she yelled after him helpfully, having noticed from afar the note taped to her door, and knowing what it usually meant at this hour. "You can run, but you can't hiiiide!"

Bobby stopped in front of the door to his own suite, shaking the handle desperately. "Damn it!" He glanced over his shoulder, and slumped against the wall. Trapped. "Hey, Al," he said with a weak grin, trying to catch his breath, which was leaving him in frosty clouds.

A near carnovorous grin answered him as Alison tapped her foot patiently, then waggled her eyebrows with far too happy look about her. "Gotcha." She stepped aside, winking at him. "And now, we head back to see Lorna. Methinks someone has lumps coming to him."

Lorna had acquired herself coffee and a robe and had followed Alison and Bobby's path at a more leisurely pace. She arrived on the scene still plaster covered but much more composed. "You rang?"

"Um. Eep?" Bobby cowered against the wall, looking from one girl to the other. "Lorna, can't we talk about this like civilized mutants?"

"Will it involve you stuck through like a pin-cushion?" Lorna glanced at Alison to determine if she was allowed to do that.

Alison shook her head, tut tutting cheerfully, a gleam in her eyes that had nothing to do with her power. "I want to know what he was thinking pulling that on you, first." She nodded wisely, because really, it was an important thing to know. And she wasn't laughing at Lorna, nope, not one bit. Yet.

"Really, I think this should be between Lorna and me," Bobby stammered, because facing Lorna's wrath alone was better than letting Alison know what he'd tried to do.

Lorna stalked forward and grabbed his ear, "Okay, but first answer me this: Do you have fresh towels in your bathroom?"

Well, there was certainly no way Alison was going to let this go unwitnessed. "Don't forget to ask for hot water too," she nodded wisely, snickering at the entire scene but carefully stifling the sound - she knew Lorna's temper only too well.

"Yes," Lorna hissed, "very hot water."

Bobby yelped and whimpered. "Y-yes. Both, help yourself." He knew when he was beat, and ohboy, if he was lucky, he wouldn't be beaten too badly by the furious Lorna. But he wasn't counting on it.

Alison blinked, then glared. "Hey! Waitaminute! This means I have no working shower either!!!" The look she gave Bobby at that held promise of eternal pain, oh yes.

"Good," she said shortly, then nodded at Alison, "Make sure he doesn't escape, we can kill him after I'm clean." She let go of Bobby ear and shoved him in Alison's general direction then stalked into Bobby's room and slammed the door. Again.

Bobby collided with Alison for the second time that morning, jumping back as if burned. "This is all your fault," he grumbled under his breath, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"My fault?" she gaped at him, then scowled, remembering the fact that the hot shower she had been looking forward to wasn't exactly going to happen as planned. "How, exactly, is this my fault? I wasn't even... there... " she trailed off, narrowing her eyes.

"Um." Bobby backed toward his door, not liking the expression on Alison's face one bit. "I was talking to...myself?"

"I wasn't there," Alison repeated, stalking after him, matching each step he took with one of her own, an ominous air about her. "Oh, you'll be talking to yourself by the time I'm done with you, all right."

He thumped against the door, realized going in just now was probably a VERY BAD idea, and slipped sideways, edging along the wall. "You tricked me," he said accusingly, trying to hide his cowering fear behind righteous indignation.

"Oh don't you try changing the subject, mister!" Alison jabbed a finger towards him, following him closely. "You were going to freeze my shower water! My nice warm," she paused, adding more importance to the word, "hot shower water!"

"But I didn't!" Bobby pointed out desperately, and backed away more rapidly.

"You would have! You meant to!" Oh no, he wasn't worming his way out of this one. "Why you..." with a low growl, Alison accelerated her pace, reaching out for him with an evil look in her eyes.

That was enough for him. He spun around, nearly tripping over his own feet, and ran, full-bore, for the nearest stairwell. He could apologize to Lorna later.

Alison wasted no time giving chase, grinning evilly before yelling out at the top of her lungs - which was something rather remarkable, considering her vocal training. "Bobby! Get back here and DIE!"

Lorna, who was currently deep in the bliss of a hot shower and hot coffee, heard her roomie shout and called out in encouragement "CATCH HIM AND CASTRATE HIM, ALI!"

"DON'T DO ANY SUCH THING, ALI!" Bobby near-screamed as he hit the stairs and flew down them without slowing.

"WITH A BRICK!" was the return answer, full of mock rage. "YOU KILLED MY PRECIOUS WATER! DIE!"

Lorna laughed herself silly and helped herself to Bobby's shampoo. Then dumped the rest. Petty revenge, yes but such was life.

Bobby decided to save the rest of his breath for putting some distance between himself and Alison. He took off toward the front doors of the mansion, hoping that her earlier run might give him the advantage over a long distance. She'd already be tired...right?

Alison tailed close by in hot pursuit, shouting incoherently now and then in pure rage (well, faked, but extremely well and Bobby didn't need to know that, really), promising him several dire fates that would have had the bravest man pale at the notion.

Bobby grabbed the doorknob and twisted. Or tried to. His eyes traveled over the series of locks, every one engaged. Damn, Lorna had been thorough, hadn't she? With a desperate whimper, he began hurriedly disengaging the locks, one after another, trying not to glance over his shoulder to find out how close Alison had gotten.

The hand clapping down on his shoulder firmly, followed by a low growl of triumph allowed him to find out exactly how close Alison had gotten to him, even as she turned him around to face her, letting go and setting both hands on her hips firmly. And grinned.

A bit later, Bobby gets a chance to talk to Lorna and explain what happened.


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Alison had passed Bobby off to Lorna with a conspiratory grin. Lorna had nodded in return then dragged Bobby off to the scene of his crime. She pointed him into the destroyed bathroom and crossed her arms over her chest. Though much mollified by her shower and coffee cure, she still had every intention of making Bobby suffer all the torments that she could devise without actually breaking international law. "So," she said with a glare as cold as her first shower had been, "what the hell were you doing freezing the shower water of a recent invalid?"

Bobby looked at the damage she'd done and sighed heavily. "It was supposed to be Alison, not you."

Lorna opened her mouth, blinked then shut her mouth. After a moment's thought, she started again, "Sorry?"

Bobby leaned against the wall, looking dejected. "I was trying to get Alison. For revenge," he added in a near growl, his eyes narrowing.

Lorna blinked again, "Okay, setting aside the part where I'm so going to make your life a living hell for doing this to me, what did she do?"

"She tricked me!" Bobby stood up, trying to pace in the small room. Realizing it was futile, he turned to face Lorna. "She tricked me into seeing that shrink, Dr. Samson."

"Ah," Lorna tugged the towel she'd stolen from Bobby's room off her hair, "She got you too, eh?"

He nodded, then did a small double-take. "Wait, me too? She's been recruiting for the guy?"

"She cornered me in the kitchen and used the woeful 'I'm worried' look on me." Lorna frowned. "I think she is without a soul."

"She pulled me in with 'I'd feel better if you went.' Of course, she made it out to be just about the last attack, just wanting me to talk to the guy, make sure I was really okay with it. She knew he wouldn't stop there..." He stopped, not really wanting to go into more details, and reveal too much.

"Of course, she knew. She always knows!" Lorna realized the pacing problem as well and backed up into the common room of the suite so she'd have freedom to move, "It's so unfair."

"Exactly. Which is why I tried to...I swear, Lorna. I didn't even think about the fact that it could be you. I didn't think you'd even be up yet." He followed her back into the common room as he spoke. "I was going to catch her after her run."

"Oh don't worry, you're still going to pay for this with your blood, sweat and tears." She shot him a tight, sadistic little grin, "I've already called Cain and told him what you did to my bathroom." She tightened the belt on her robe and flopped into the armchair, "But this Alison thing needs to be dealt with. She must be stopped. Or at least suitably punished. She'll get ideas if she doesn't."

"Punishment? Count me in," he replied quickly, moving around to take the chair opposite her. "Any ideas? Since my last one went so well..." He made a face and glanced at the bathroom. It was not going to be fun fixing the tangle of pipes he saw, not to mention new plaster, new tile...

Lorna pulled herself up and tucked her legs underneath her, making sure that the fading scars were hidden. "Right, yeah. The less you talk about that one, the sooner I'm likely to forgive you by the way." She drummed her fingers restlessly on the arm of the chair then made a face, "Trouble is, she takes everything so damned well."

"Right. Not another word." Not that the trail of plaster bits leading from the bathroom to the hallway door wouldn't serve as a reminder all on its own. He watched her intently, trying to think of something that might possibly get under Alison's skin.

"Can't use Miles without huge breaches of ethics. Too bad, he'd be great at getting under her radar. There is no way to find music she doesn't like so we can't replace her cd collection with anything." Lorna chewed on her bottom lip, thinking the problem through. "She has no shame, so public humiliation is out. What's her vulnerable spot?"

"I can't think of one. Argh, she is the devil-woman!" Bobby flopped back in the chair in frustration, staring at the ceiling. "This is going to require some thought."

"And brainstorming sessions," Lorna nodded, "Which means that we need brain power and that means breakfast." She got to her feet and held her hand out to Bobby, "How do you feel about vanilla french toast?"

"Food?" Bobby perked up, taking her hand and rising. "Vanilla french toast sounds great." He was a bit wary about just what revenge Lorna might still get for the cold shower, but he wasn't about to show her that--she might not feed him, then!

"Good. Then go downstairs and gather the ingredients for me. There's fresh bread in the breadbox." She summoned a spiral bound recipe book to her hand and flipped it open to the simple recipe. "I've got to get dressed." She handed him the book and flashed him a smile that dared him to argue with her.

He wasn't that stupid. "I'm on it!" he assured her cheerfully, heading for the door, planning to slink down to the kitchen in the hopes that no one else assaulted him for disturbing their sleep.

Lorna nodded in satisfaction and closed the door behind him with a wave. He obviously hadn't caught exactly what she'd meant when she said she'd called Cain. Bobby was up for fixing a hell of a lot more than just the shower. In fact, she would have placed good odds that Cain was going to have a right hand man for quite some time. All's fair, after all.