xp_logs | Love Potion Number 9: Doug's Aftermath

Set immediately after Doug runs out of his room, once Amanda casts the counterspell.

Doug sprinted into the garage, hunching over, hands on knees as he struggled to catch his breath. Every muscle in his body was burning, but that was nothing compared to the burning in his brain and his heart. Casting his eyes around the garage, he looked for a car to take. ~Gotta get out, gotta get away, gotta run...~

Thanking Mr. Summers' habit of keeping all the cars fueled and the keys in a cabinet, Doug snagged the keys to a Mitsubishi 3000ZX and hopped into the driver's seat. He definitely needed a stick shift and some horsepower. It was hard to drive angry without a stick shift. Putting the car into gear, he squashed the frantic urge to race out the gate as fast as he could. Driving the car slowly until he was at least a half-mile from the campus, he snarled and threw the sports car into gear.

The cold wind bit at his face through the unrolled windows. Doug was in a mood to punish himself. He downshifted into a curve as the tenor hum of the motor dropped to a basso growl. Accelerating out of the turn, he threw the car back into a higher gear and stabbed at the power button on the radio.

After a commercial, the local alternative radio station came back. A strumming acoustic guitar began, and Doug dashed away immediate tears as John Mayer began singing. "My stupid mouth..." Doug practically punched the radio in an attempt to change the channel. Finally, he settled on a station where the loud guitar of Rammstein's "Du Hast" filled the air. It suited Doug's mood, the repetitive German meaning "You...you hate...you hate me..."

But no matter how fast he drove, how recklessly he slid through the turns, he couldn't outrun the voices and memories in his own mind. "You're a wonderful man, Doug." "I never noticed how handsome you were, Doug." "I donnae ken why ye waste so much time over her." "You are too sweet, too good to let go just like that." But one voice was louder than the rest, one memory even starker than the others.

Marie, cradling his head to her shoulder. Marie, in his lap. Marie, smiling impishly on her cupped hands. Marie, kneeling on her couch as he left her door. And most of all, Marie telling him "I love you, Doug." It rang in his ears. "I love you, Doug." "I love you, Doug."

Finally, Doug pulled into a darkened park in Salem Center. Rolling the windows up, he crawled into the backseat, pulled his coat over himself, and slowly cried himself to sleep.