xp_logs | Log: Sarah and Jake and the sitcom graveyard

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Takes place after this. Sarah comes by the rec room to pick up her cigs. Jake's, heh, chilling. Babble happens. Sarah's confused, Jake is spacey. It all makes sense in the end.

Jake was convinced he'd seen that episode of "Step by Step" before. He was equally convinced he'd seen the episode of the show which aired before "Step by Step" as well. He was vaguely aware that there were some sort of law for this kind of thing, but couldn't really be bothered to care. It was only on as a sort of background static, anyway, as he idly kept checking alternately his mail and the school's lj system every five minutes inbetween eating a piece of strawberry cake he'd managed to rescue. Everybody else were apparently too busy angsting, because he was all alone in the rec room. Jake was happy about that. Teenagers on angst got on his nerves.

Sarah came into the rec room with an ashtray in one hand, and a lit cigarette in her mouth. The outline of what had been a brand new pack of cigarettes a few hours ago and was now nearly empty showed in the back pocket of her jeans. This whole trying to prevent a lynch mob thing was hard work. She plopped down in an armchair, facing away from the television and towards Jake. Much more entertainment in that direction, yes. Cigarettes too. "Hi."

He looked up from the iBook. Bone-y girl? Ah. He dug into the pocket of his jacket and tossed her the Marlboros. "Here you are." Jake considered his options for a moment, then put down his iBook and leaned back in the couch, arms on the seat palm down and a curious look on his face. "And also, hi."

She caught the cigarettes and rested them in her lap, taking the cigarette in her mouth out long enough to flick ashes into the ashtray in her hand. "Thanks for the cigarettes," she said, before returning the cigarette to it's spot between her lips. She didn't offer to say anything else, but she didn't really look like she's expecting Jake to say anything else either. She just sat there in the armchair.

Jake shrugged. "No problem. Warren tricked me, the blackmailing little cunt. Pardon the language," he added after a moment, smirking. He somehow didn't think she'd take offence.

Sarah gave him an odd look when he apologises, finally breaking into a little grin. "You've yet to say anything I haven't heard, said, or called somebody at the mansion at one point or another."

"Well, I'm supposed to be a..." he rolled his eyes towards the ceiling and then did an uncanny imitation of Xavier's voice. "Role model for the youth here, after all." he dropped the Xavier voice. "What with being a counselor and all."

"Yeah. And I'm sure apologising for 'cunt' is going to do wonders for my behavior." She shrugged a little, scratching around one of the bone horns on her forehead.

Jake shrugged again, amused. "Who knows? It might. You could suddenly realise that, really, what you want in life is to be a Jane Austen character and take up needle point and painting and ballroom dancing and everything. Speaking of ballroom dancing, what have you done with Shinobi?"

"What have I done with Shinobi?" she repeated, a wicked grin spreading on her face. "Do you want the Cliffs Notes or the version with all the naughty details?"

Jake's eyebrows rose slowly. "Not really what I meant. Unless you feel a desperate need to share, of course."

Sarah's a little disappointed at his reaction, but she didn't show it. Instead, she shrugged again, and taking one last drag off of her cigarette before putting it out in the ashtray. "He needed a little corrupting. He said so himself."

"I bet he did." Jake grinned. He was enjoying himself and not really thinking about what he was saying. Sarah was being refreshingly unangst and Jake appreciated that. He just wasn't in the mood for dramatics right now. "Seems to have worked. Can't hardly make him blush any more. Takes all the fun out of it for me, but he's happy, I suppose."

"You think you're disappointed? That was a constant source of entertainment." Sarah was also pretty tired of dealing with the angry masses, so much so that she may have actually been enjoying the conversation. Not that she'd ever admit it to anyone. "I talked him into playing strip poker once... I had no idea anyone could blush that much."

Jake straightened, eyes wide. "You did? How'd you do that? ...He lost, right? Man, I haven't played strip poker since I was seventeen." He got the look of someone recalling something very amusing. "That was..." He smirked. "Let's just say that when it comes to facial expressions, a shapeshifter really holds all the cards. Which is why I lost." His grin was quite wicked now.

"It's a gift, apparently. I seem to have acquired a reputation for luring boys into the basement and getting them naked." She laughed, leaning back onto the arm of the chair. "And yes, he lost. In front of Jono. It was quite the sight."

"I believe you." Jake leaned forwards, eyes glittering with mirth. "Tell me... Red all over or?"

"Nearly," she said with a grin, "And we teased him mercilessly. I'm surprised he wanted to see me again after that."

"He's very... insistent when he wants something. Guess it's something he has from his father." Jake leaned back, noting absently that "Step by Step" had given way for "Fresh Prince of Bel Air". What the hell was this channel? The place sitcoms went to die?

"No kidding. And he drives a hard bargain when he wants to get his way. Hell, he dragged me out to a dressy restaurant for Valentines." She scratched at her leg through her jeans, noting that she'd have to deal with a bone there pretty soon.

Jake made a face. "Valentines Day was created by the devil in at attempt to kill us by red and pink hearts overdoses. Um. I have issues." Hmm. Resturant.. That reminded him, he still had some cake left... "Did you have good food?"

"Yes. The Student Counselor having issues is a comforting thought," she said dryly, and nodded. "Yeah. It wasn't too traumatic. But still."

"I know." He nodded, then grinned suddenly. "Also, you think I'm here because I'm a perfectly well adjusted person? Where have you been the last three months?"

"Nobody here is well-adjusted. It's part of the admissions process. But it does remind me of why I don't bother taking my 'issues' to you all." she said matter-of-factly, lighting up another cigarette.

"They have that nice doctor person here for that now," Jake pointed out, not bothered by not being her choice for person to confide issues too. He was more relieved. "By the way, am I the only one who has a deep urge to cut his hair off, just to see what'd happen?"

"I don't have anything a good workout with Logan can't fix. And maybe a few hours in the gym. But after that, I'm fine." She stopped for a moment, clearly debating her next statement. "I once knew a guy called Samson. I tried. He wasn't pleased. In fact, he may have been the first person to test just how well my healing factor worked."

"Hmm. I'll take that as an advice, I think." Jake thought for a moment. "...So, nothing happened, huh? I'm kind of disappointed by that. I have no idea why."

"No. He could still throw me across the fucking room. Of course, I was ten. But I don't really think that had much to do with it."

"This one is a shrink though. Aren't they supposed to be mild mannered types?" Now the idea had lodged in his brain and refused to go away.

"I wouldn't risk it. He may get cranky if you mess with his hair." This was probably one of the oddest conversations ever, she decided.

Jake was struck with an other thought. This thought made him reconsider. "...You think he'd tell Moira?"

"I figure the entire school would find out about it. That's the way things work around here." She tapped ashes into the ashtray, trying not to look at Jake like he's absolutely insane.

"Moira scares the hell out of me, so that's out then." Jake shrugged. He saw the way she looked at him, and looked a little sheepish. "I'm just. Amanda suggested something for me the other day, and I'm. Kind of doing it, but it makes me flake-y. Hard to focus."

Right. That makes even less sense. "So I don't have to get Shinobi to talk you into _not_ shearing the shrink?"

"No. Well. Probably not." Jake brightened, looking about five in age. "But you could make him buy me cake, 'cause he promised me."

"He just did, didn't he?" She eyed him carefully. Could have sworn she read that on the journals.

"Yeah, so? He already owed me that cake. What's wrong with getting two cakes?" Right around then it started dawning on Jake that not all of Amanda's ideas were incredibly good, and just perhaps he should stop this experiment now. Although he wasn't doing much other than recreating a weaker version of what extasy did to him, he was starting to feel a little... Off.

...And Jake's the one who's supposed to help with life decisions? Sarah would take her chances with Pete. "So what exactly did the glitter fairy suggest you do?"

"The glitter fairy?" Jake blinked. "Yana?"

"Amanda. She's now the glitter fairy, since she insisted on coating Shinobi in glitter a while back," she corrects, "what did she suggest you do?"

"Ahhh. Oh, yeah." Jake grinned. That had been pretty funny. "How'd you know she'd suggested any-- Oh, you know about the magic-y sessions?" He tilted his head, blinking rapidly, trying to clear his head, but it was hard to think. "She found a bit in a book about shamanic rituals and finding oneself and, and, possibly some sort of animal was involved, can't remember, but, well, since we don't really have any shamans around." pause. "as far as I know. And the discription sounded a little like e..."

Sarah nearly shook her head in disbelief, instead, just sort of watching Jake with a vague 'oh my god, you're serious.' look. "So she's turned you into a frog, but you're letting her do some Shamanic thing she just found in a book?" Yes. Definately sticking with Pete.

"This is actually better than the eyeballs and the swirly butterfly things," Jake noted. Unfortunately this made him remember those episodes with unfortunate clearity and he shuddered. He shook his head a little. It was getting easier to think. Sarah had a very strange expression on her face. That was kind of funny. Jake grinned. "And I'm actually doing this myself. She's not so bad though. Well, when she's not turning me into a frog, obviously."

"Yes, well, half the mansion'd like her head on a platter, unfortunately." This is just reallyreally weird. She put out her cigarette, and started to get up, holding her new packs of cigarettes in one hand, and her ashtray and lighter in the other. "And for some reason, I feel the need to hold back the lynch mob."

Jake rolled his eyes, rapidly sobering up now. It was really just that first bit which was hard, once it had started, he could take away the effect easily. "They're all fuckers," he said succinctly. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, head in his hands. "Although, you don't need to tell anyone I said that." He looked up. "Sorry about... Well, this. You know. I'm usually slightly more coherent, I swear."

Sarah grinned, and shook her head. "No problem. Though, you may want to lay off it a bit. You're not much help when you're all spacey, and from the looks of things, it doesn't do you much good." Yep, still female. "I'll see what I can do about that cake though." She left Jake alone with sitcom hell still on the television.

"Luuuucy," the tv said. "You have some 'splaining to do!"

Jake groaned.