xp_logs | LOG: Manuel and Marie

Who: Empath, Manuel de la Rocha, Rogue, and Marie
Where: Back yard of the Mansion, then out for a drive in upstate NY
When: Day of Love Potion #9's Aftermath

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Manuel's taking a walk outside, huddled into several layers of clothing and clearly shivering. But the alternative must be worse, as outside he is. He's got a cigarette dangling from his lower lip, in serious danger of lighting his layers of clothing on fire. If you look closely, his eyes might seem a little more red than the late-afternoon light would seem to allow for.

Being in the sky takes away a little of the fear. The illusion that no one can catch her is stronger here. Marie flies up as far as she dares into the dark and then lets herself fall. It's a game, to catch herself before she breaks the ice. Inertia is irrelevant. A thought stops her inches from the sparkling sheet of white. She's not ready to let go, not yet.

Manuel looks up, sensing an emotional pattern where there usually isn't one to be sensed. The pain of it, the fear and loss, drives him to his knees before he can get his mental feet underneath him and stand. "Senorita!" he shouts in Marie's general direction, hoping that he's loud enough to get her attention without drawing unwanted curiousities from the Mansion proper.

The break in the silence startles her and Marie darts skyward again. Up is safety. From twenty feet above the lake, she looks for the source of the voice. Spanish, coming from the direction of the house. Manuel. She wills herself in his direction, dropping to stand with her feet slowly sinking into the snow among the winter-crushed cattails. "Yes, Manuel?"

Manuel shivers as he watched Marie land before him. "I wanted to ... talk. Just talk. You _hurt_. I could sense it all the way across the Mansion. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I'm sorry I disturbed you," she says quietly, hugging herself while his cigarette smoke trails around them. "I... I don't know. I had it under control before and now it feels like I'm Pandora's Box."

Manuel smiles wanly. "I knew you would be. We are more alike than we admit. I too feel that I shall soon go mad. I cannot block them all out. I am sad, or angry, or often both at the same time. So I am resolved to do what I can to make things better. Senora Frost does not have the time to tell me the way, so I come to you."

"I should be afraid of you," Marie says thoughtfully, focusing on him across the short, dark distance between them. "I'm so afraid of someone changing who I am, using me that way. But I can't make myself be. Is that your doing? Or is it just a combination of fatalism and my mothlike attraction for honesty in anyone, no matter who or what they are?"

Manuel was expecting something like that. "I cannot answer your question. If I am lying, and forcing you to believe, then what I say does not matter. If I am being honest with you, then I will just be telling you what you want to hear. But no, I am not manipulating you. At least as far as I know."

"We will pretend," Marie says with a wry smile. "No one's ever totally honest, no one. I do always appreciate the effort, though." She holds out her gloved hand to him, not to shake his hand but to hold it, familiarly, like a friend. "You're cold so we should walk a little. I'll trust you. At least I'll pretend that it is my choice to do so and not hold any of it against you if it's not. Fair enough?"

Manuel smiles, the first honest expression he's had all day. "We will walk." he says, then takes the offered hand and heads off on the path around the lake. "And you do not need to tell me how much people lie. I see it every day. Too many still believe that this is all my fault. They would never admit it, but I can sense it. It should make me angry, but all I feel is ... sadness."

"They only need an excuse, and there you are," Marie says, her voice quiet and sad. "But, I can't be too comfortable to be around for you, though so that first. I feel a little better but it's mostly the company." She gives his hand a little squeeze. "How long will it last, if you change my colours, so to speak?"

Manuel sighs. "I know. It distresses me, but there is nothing I can do. I offered my help, but no one will take it. Perhaps there is a message in the silence." he muses as they both walk. "I do not know. I have tried to make permanent changes, to shade the palate, but it never stays for long. The best I've been able to do is a few hours. If I'm actively making the changes, then I can do it forever. But if I want to make a change and then be done with it, it always unravels before too long."

"Enough to get the walls steady, at least," Marie says. Her pace is leisurely and she swings his hand in hers a little as she walks. "My partitioning is always worse when I'm afraid like this." She's made the choice to trust him and to believe that it's her choice and so on into infinite interations. She lets the issue drop. Trust is a choice sometimes and she leaps in feel first. "Have you ever done it to comfort someone, someone who asked?"

Manuel nods. "I've done it for money, I've done it because people asked, I've even done it because it amused me." he admits, returning honesty for honesty. "It was the only way, on the streets, to make sure I survived. People always have needs, and when there's a need, there will inevitably be someone who can meet that need."

Marie's emotions surge toward sympathy. "I know," she says, leaning close enough that their shoulders brush companionably. She was on the street for a time herself and knows the drill. "I would like it if you helped me." She's almost shy about it. Asking for help isn't something she's good at. "I'm afraid of myself and the more afraid I am, the more dangerous I can be. It feeds itself."

Manuel smiles. "I know that fear very well. Do you want me to do it here, or is there someplace with meaning to you that would be better? Know this - I cannot make it all better permanently. You will still feel sad, you will still hurt. All that I can do is give you time to breathe."

"Here is good." Marie looks up at the stars through the trees and the cracks in the clouds. "I know you can't." She squeezes his hand again, gently. "I wouldn't want it to be permanent. Time to breathe is all I need."

"This I can give you. It is good to have a friend, for just a little while, isn't it?" And with that, his eyes blaze cherry-red as he reaches out with his power. In his mind's eye, the black and grey of the fear, the sadness, all of that gets slowly, almost gently ebbed back towards clear until they are gone. He then strains his power, pushes hard to tie the change off, to make it last without his supervision. "It is done. I cannot say how long it will last. Do not test it overmuch, or it will unravel quickly."

The sudden lightness makes her giddy for a moment, and then Marie inhales slowly, to settle herself. It's easy to find her center right now and she bites her lip to contain her happiness. "Thank you." Her posture shifts, she's no longer the coil of tension she had been. Her exhalation is a thin sigh of white breath and relief. "Would you like me to walk with you a little more?"

"I would like that a great deal." he says, mirroring her happiness with a smile of his own. "It is very cold out here, but inside ..." he leaves the rest of that thought unvoiced.

"We can go in where it's warmer," Marie says, taking in his unspoken suggestion with slight amusement. "But if you're being suggestive, I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed. Just friends." She steers them along a narrow path that doubles back through the trees toward the house.

Manuel looks disgusted - with himself. ~We are being honest tonight.~ he reminded himself in Castillian. "Inside is ... unhealthy. Too many bad feelings. So I will stay out here, and when I fall ill you can feed me soup." he says with a plastic, fake smile.

Marie puts her arm around him, taking in the look of disgust and then the false smile with some concern. "Want to go for a drive?" she offers. "I'll grab a car and we can go away from here for a little. It always helps me."

Manuel -twitches- as Marie puts her arm around his shoulders. "I would not want you to feel that I was seducing you." he finally admits. "Is it permitted for one such as me to leave? No papers?"

Marie looks at him for a long moment. "Well. As for the seducing, I only wanted to be clear. I don't much pay attention to that kind of thing and didn't want to misunderstand. We said honest and I'm going with that. I am a teacher, and on staff with the team. I need to get out of here for a bit and so do you. There's no one for miles out there on some roads and I'd like to kind of return the favour that you did me. Driving will settle me more and you might get to relax. What do you think?"

Manuel nods as he double-checks her emotional makeup for duplicity. "I would like that." he admits. "Clarity is good. I am ... overly defensive of late. I like women, and right now, that is a crime."

Marie steers them toward the garage and keys in a code at the side door to let them in. "Oh, right... Ms. Frost's comments. I trust you on that front," she assures him, and she does. "I'll leave a message saying we're going for a spin and we'll go get some fresh air."

Manuel nods his acceptance. "Very well. I ... just want a friend." he blurts, suddenly sounding far less worldy and jaded than his usual wont.

Marie stops in the process of pulling keys out of her pocket and turns to face Manuel. "You can try with me," she offers. "I'm pretty patient and I like being honest and I think we might understand each other a little more than other people do. So, if you want, we could try."

Manuel looks so desperate for acceptance that it could almost make you cry. "I would like that. Very much." he says with some real passion in his voice. "Things here are so different..."

"I can imagine. And I'd like it too, to be honest. I think you're an interesting person." Marie smiles at him as she gets her keys out of her jeans pocket at last. She takes Manuel's hand again, leading him to a little blue Mazda 3. "You could tell me in the car if you want, about it being different." She opens the door for him. "I love to drive, by the way. If you want to get out, you can let me know any time."

Manuel looks at the car. "I do not know how to drive. So please, lead on. We will talk and drive."

"Suits me fine," Marie says with a mischevious grin. "I like being the one behind the wheel." She sees him seated in the passenger side and then makes a brief call on her cellphone before getting into the driver's side. "There," she says, doing up her seatbelt. "Covered being responsible. Seatbelt on, if you don't mind. I have this thing about the windshield being intact." She opens the garage door and backs out slowly.

Manuel does as he is told, buckling himself in securely. "And I am accustomed to being driven." he says with a smile.

"I figured. Do you want to learn?" She turns right out of the gates and is soon driving at just above the posted speed limit.

Manuel stops to consider the idea. "I am not sure." he admits. "It sounds appealing, but I am entirely dependent on the goodwill of others. I cannot afford a car." And how _that_ admission galls him, by the look on his face.

Marie laughs. "I don't own a car either. And learning to drive is standard curriculum." She looks over at him. "You're a smart man, Manuel, and you're gifted. I think you'll have no trouble making your own way once you're on your feet."

Manuel snorts. "It is a gift with razor edges." he says ruefully. "And is it? I did not know that. Senora Frost chooses my courses for me."

Marie makes a small noise of displeasure at that. "Well, if you've got any sort of legal identification, you can get your learner's permit. And then you could learn from anyone." Her expression is completely guileless as she devotes her attention to a series of tight curves. She was correct in that it does not take long to leave most other people far behind on some roads.

Manuel revels in the sparseness, the lack of pressure. He likes it so much that he relaxes whatever rudimentary shielding he actually _does_ possess, casting his mind open to the expanse of nothing. The relief is, quite literally, palpable.

Marie glances over at him again and then turns her attention back to the road. The little car hums along pleasantly in the dark and the roads are clear and mostly empty. She doesn't say much for a time, enjoying the peace and quiet herself, centering and settling her mind with practiced care.

Manuel doesn't nearly have the practice that Marie does, but even he manages to gain a little bit of focus, a little precious slice of serenity. "This is the best I have felt in ... ever. The best I've felt ever. No emotions hammering in on my being, no feeling everyone else, just ... me. And you, but that's OK. You're not radiating."

"Good." Marie turns down another narrow road. "It's hardly an inconvenience to me to get to relax and it's even better to get to share it, especially with someone who needs it as much as you do."

"And you would not think to use it against me." he says happily. "That is what makes it perfect. No expectations. You are not looking for my weakness, not trying to bend me to your will." But at this, he sobers a bit. "Are you?"

Marie shakes her head. "No. That would go against what I value," she says, unoffended by the question. "I like being able to give you this, it's a good thing. And giving you help to become who you want to be, that's... that's almost sacred."

"I learned very early on that one does not give without expecting in return. This is very new." he says pensively. "So many just see what it is I can do. Sometimes, that's all _I_ can see. The boy underneath often gets overlooked."

"That's not fair at all," Marie says quietly. "And I know this is new. So... maybe this is practice. To see how it works, to see if you like it? You trusting me is hard, maybe harder than it is for me to trust you. I have more practice."

Manuel just smirks, and stretches out a bit in the confines of the car. "I am still trying to discover who the boy behind the power is. He is ... very afraid."

"I can relate to that a little at least." The road winding in the hills emerges on the downward side to dip into the white-sheeted empty fields of sleeping farms. "What's he afraid of?"

Manuel stops to think for a moment. "He is afraid of the power he wields. He is afraid of being used, of having strange people handle his body. He does not understand the language very well, so much of what is said he misses. But mostly, he doesn't have anyone."

Marie remembers some of that from her manifestation though her loneliness had really been intermittent, if painful. "The first two I understand, and the second two can be changed," she says. "You have a lot to learn, I know, a lot to overcome. Once the last changes, the first two fade a little. They haven't gone away for me yet, don't think they ever will. But it gets better."

Manuel pensively nods. "But to really solve the problem, I need to discover who I am. Who is Manuel, when he's not Empath? I do not know."

Marie nodded. "You need balance. Like... Marie and Rogue with me. They're me, but I can give them different names because they fill different functions and relate to people differently. They even have different ethics."

Manuel shakes his head. "You can't balance with one side undefined. I remember that much from math class." he comments.

"So, how do you propose to find Manuel?" she asks, without any facetiousness to her tone.

Manuel shrugs. "I do not know. I have been trying to find a way, but so far - nothing. Every time I try, Empath comes out to play. Or something else bad happens." His voice is changing, losing what little precision he's managed to gain in English.

"Well. Maybe we can make it through a car ride without anything bad." Her tone is reassuring and she checks the clock and the passing road signs. "Would that be enough of a start? Just to rest for a while?"

"That would be very nice. And I can just be me for a while - whoever that is." he says, leaning back and closing his eyes. "Do you have any music?" he asks, eyes still closed.

"I think there's some CDs in here." Marie reaches behind his seat and pulls out a folder of them. "Not sure what's in here. Classical, I think."

"It will have to do." he says, opening his eyes and taking the folder of CDs. "Do you have any preferences?" he asks, for once just not scanning and assuming.

"If it's not rap, hiphop, or country, I'll be happy," she replies. "Suit yourself."

"I prefer industrial or techno myself. I learned to shield by listening to music. Then the asylum took my music away." he says, with some real sadness. Flipping through the CDs, he finally selects one and puts in in - oddity of oddities, it's a Baroque CD of chamber music. Almost etherially light and soothing.

Marie winces a little at the word 'asylum' but lets it slide. "I'll remember that, about the music," she promises.

“I DJ, but you probably already knew that." he comments after the opening strains of the music have wafted by. "I used to live and work in the clubs, when I was on the streets. That's where I also learned to be Empath."

Marie nods, listening. She relaxes into the curves of the driver's seat, hands loose on the wheel. "Were you alone out there?"

"Oh no. An empath is _never_ alone. I was selling happiness, or whatever people needed. $50 a pop got you a couple of minutes of bliss, of self-confidence, or despair, or whatever you wanted to feel. I also made a lot of temporary new friends who would take care of me." he admits.

"Maybe I meant lonely. Or... whether or not you had anyone who actually cared."

Manuel ahs softly, and listens to the music for a few moments. "No, there was no one." he admits.

"I'm sorry. I know how that feels." She's not distressed, really. He's here now, and that's what matters.

Manuel quirks an eyebrow. "Do you, now? You feel that you do, but I have to wonder. I know almost nothing about you. Nobody tells me _anything_." The last comes through with real frustration. "I am just expected to _know_. I'm an empath, not a telepath!"

"I don't talk about it much. Do you want to hear then?" Marie looks over at him. "I don't mind telling."

Manuel nods. "You have listened to me, I can listen to you. But please - speak slowly. I am not good with English yet."

"When my mutation started, I found out by nearly killing a boy who kissed me, just by kissing him back," Marie says, speaking at a measured pace. "His name is Cody and he's one of the permanent ones. I stayed home until they found out it wasn't on purpose and it wasn't really my fault. I stayed so my parents wouldn't suffer any consequences. Then, I left. I was alone on the road for months."

Manuel nods. "I know something of that. When my power manifested, I discovered that both my parents were having affairs. And when they discovered that I knew, their anger and fear drove me from the estate."

"It was like I was dead, for them," Marie explains. "They're devout Christians and I'm their only child. They grieved. The neighbors and preacher came to hold their hands and pray. I would sit on the stairs and listen. They did everything but bury me. So I left, so they wouldn't have to live with my ghost."

Manuel nods, and lets Marie continue her story. "That made you very sad." he says. "And angry. You feel it now, although it is an old feeling."

She nods, affirming his analysis, not that he needs it. "I went north, to Alaska. I hitch-hiked there. See, I figured up there, who would care if I wore gloves all the time? I always wanted to go anyway. It took me a while, but I got there."

Manuel shivers just _thinking_ about it. "Go on..."

"I got all the way up there and a trucker dropped me off at this dreadful bar." Marie smiles, reminiscing. "I was freezing cold, sixteen, alone, in the middle of nowhere, and stuck in a place full of spilled beer and cigarette smoke where the only entertainment was two men in a cage fight." For some reason, this makes her deeply happy, thinking about it.

Manuel picks up the happiness. "You have odd tastes in entertainment." he comments.

Marie is amused, both by his comment and herself. "Well, considering one of the men was Logan, yes, it was most entertaining."

Manuel scowls at the reminder of his own meeting of Logan. "I have met this Logan. It did not go well."

Marie is unphased by this information. "That's not unusual. He's not a likeable person most of the time."

"No, I am fairly certain that the fault was mine. It was, how does Doug say, a very bad day." he says.

Marie laughed. "Wait until you get to know him then. You might dislike him on his own merits. People do. But he's a good person, in his way. At least he is to me."

Manuel shrugs. "There is a core of anger in him like I have never felt - no, that is not true. Like I have felt only once before."

Marie is curious. "Where would that be?"

Manuel shrugs. "The groundskeeper."

Marie blinks and then laughs at herself. "That makes a weird sense."

Manuel looks over at Marie with deadly seriousness. "I stay away from him. He would kill me even quicker than the Cajun would, if he let himself."

"I can believe that, actually. He makes my skin crawl sometimes and I want to run him off the grounds." Marie glances back at Manuel. "I thought maybe it was just Erik, but maybe it's not."

Manuel manages to look confused. "Is Erik someone I have not yet met? A student here, or perhaps a teacher?"

"I don't like his other name." Marie's hands tighten a little on the steering wheel. "He's another permanent one. People like to call him Magneto."

"Magneto? Who is that?" he asks, still confused. "Never heard of him."

"He is... not a nice person." Marie says, searching for words. "He is kind of a counterpart to Charles in his way, they were friends once, only he would like to see mutants supecede the human race. He works quite actively against humans and sometimes, we are at immediate cross-purposes." She tugs her white hair. "He gave me this."

Manuel quirks an eyebrow, picking up easily on Marie's feelings towards Magneto. "Interesting." is all he says.

Marie shrugs. "He taught me all about being used. It's why I've been so damn graceless about all this potion crap. It hits too close to the mark."

"I have a hard time remembering a time when I was not being used. The question is not "Am I being used?" by "Who is using me?" and "Why?"" he says with some amusement.

"I wasn't used to it," she says. "Not like that. Not to do that much damage. But, it's over now."

"Do you know what should really frighten me? When I first learned of the potion, I was _fascinated_. Not horrified, not concerned. I wanted to know how it had been done. Storing emotions externally - I find that possibility fascinating." he admits.

"Why should that frighten you?" Marie slows to roll through an empty four-way stop. "It is a pretty amazing concept. You could almost brew your own. I just didn't like it reminding me of the truth that I'm vulnerable as hell."

"We all are. You could kill me very easily, right now, and walk away unharmed. I could traumatize you to the point where you'd probably never want to face the real world ever again. Like Shinobi keeps quoting at me: "Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something." I still don't get where he got that from..." he muses.

"The Princess Bride," Marie says. "You really should see it."

"I think he's made the offer." Manuel says. "But my English is poor, and he speaks no Castillian. I would not enjoy it."

"Subtitles?" Marie suggests. "Or just watch it slowly? It's really not hard to follow. It's rather a fairy tale."

"They _do_ subtitles in America?" he asks with some amazement. "I did not know this. I have not seen many movies. Movies were common, and we were de la Rochas. I have been to many ballets and the opera countless times, but I have only been to a movie-house a small handful of times."

"I bet we could find one in Spanish with English subtitles on the web. Or the other way around."

Manuel smiles at that. "If you could do this, I would be in your debt. And I always pay my debts."

"I'll see what I can do, then." Marie looks over at him with a smile. "Feeling better? It's getting a little late and I want to make sure nothing goes wrong on our first drive out, like people thinking we've run off to Vegas or something."

"Vegas?" he asks, but then (wisely?) decides to let it slide. "Yes, we should return." he says. He doesn't sound very thrilled at the notion. "Thank you." he says, quite honestly. "I needed this. I am in your debt."

"If you like to consider it that way," Marie says quietly. "It was nice for me too, though. Would you like to do it again?"

Manuel lights up at the possibility. "I would be _delighted_. Somehow, I shall find a way to repay you for your kindness." He then smiles widely for the remainder of the trip home.

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