warren and cammie: the walk of shame

[x-highflying.livejournal.com]

The morning after crashing in Jay's suite, Warren wanders out to encounter one Miss Carmilla Black. It goes about as well as expected.

Warren might not have woken up with a hangover (thank you, metabolism), but it was significantly later in the day when Warren woke up. Jay had already left for classes for the day, and rather than try and pick his way through the living room to raid Jay's kitchenette, Warren beat a hasty retreat, jacket and shoes in one hand as he closed the door behind him. It was almost strange, sneaking out of a room in this hall when he used to live here. He was running his hand through his hair when he spotted a green haired girl further down the hall, and his pace stepped up a bit.

"Lorna?" He thought he'd heard that she wasn't at the mansion these days, but apparently he'd heard wrong.

Cammie paused and turned around, the bandaged left arm and the slightly Italian colored features made it very obvious that was not the green haired girl he apparently expected, “Fuck no,” she said, “So now we got two birds around here?”

.. whoa, that definitely was not Lorna. Warren blinked a couple of times, before producing his usual charming smile. "Sorry about that, she has green hair as well." He extended a hand out to her to shake, his eyes doing a quick once-over. "I'm Warren Worthington, I was once both a student and a teacher here."

“So I’ve heard,” Cammie said simply, “Not to be rude, but I’m of the No-Touching club,” she said, “So I’m not going to shake your hand. I’m Cammie. I sort of live here and try not to kill people.”

"No worries," he said just as simply, withdrawing his hand and using it to save his jacket from falling off his other arm. "So how long have you been here?"

“Almost a year now,” Cammie said, “Sorry I’m not the green haired freak you were looking for. People have pointed out the hair thing to me before, it almost makes me morbidly curious,” Cammie said. ‘Freak’ was said in a playful tone, no malice.

"You're practically an old hand than," he said with a grin. "And it's fine, I'm always up for meeting new and pretty green haired freaks." Warren really was incorrigible.

“Ha, that’s cute,” Cammie said, “But I’m poisonous.”

Warren just smirked back. "Doesn't make you any less pretty, does it?" He thinks not.

“Wow, you’re a flirt,” Cammie said simply, “Think what you want, I can promise that doesn’t change a thing.”

"I am, it's a bad habit of mine," he said with a shrug. "Most people don't take me too seriously, it's a natural reaction to attractive people. I'm not exactly looking to jump into bed with you just because I think you're pretty." You're taking all the fun out of this, Cammie.

She snorted, “You’ll have to stop with the pretty thing. I may have to hit you. And that’s never pretty,” she said, putting her bandaged left hand on her hip. She was the type of person who thrived on taking the fun out of things, “I mean, I’m really not your type. Trust me.”

"Should I be scared?" He asked with the quirk of an eyebrow. "Sorry to burst your bubble, sweetheart, but my ex can punch through walls and has a penis." He flashed her a smirk. "Since we're getting into a pissing contest over something pretty ridiculous and all."

“Ooooh, kinky. I suppose he’s got me beat there. I just kill people, but I don’t have a penis. So, mystery solved. Now we know why you’re down here,” she was so very happy about that statement. And sarcastic.

"Being gay is kinky now? Damn, here I thought I was so mainstream." Warren resisted the urge to roll his eyes, but it was becoming increasingly difficult. He had forgotten how contrary some of the people who lived here could be.

“Everything involving sex is by definition kinky, at least I find it kinky,” mostly because she had to be very, very careful when she had it, “Now, if I can laugh at it, you can too. So can the guy that I come down here to occasionally bang. And you get a cookie if you guess who it is. It’s all just a good time,” she said, a bounce in her step as she started to walk past him, “Trust me, all I’ll do is make you sick. I’m speshul that way.”

Warren quirked an eyebrow at that. "Someone's got a pretty unhealthy attitude towards sex if that's the case." Warren didn't even want to know. "... wait a second. How can you have sex with anyone if you're too poisonous to touch? That doesn't even make sense."

“I know, isn’t it great? You’ll learn, almost everything I say is a lie. Blatant, shiny, horrible lies. Except for the poison. That part’s real. But mostly under control,” Cammie said, holding up her left hand, and wiggling her fingers, “See, gangrene. Mutant gangrene. This ain’t a lie.”

"And people say lawyers are bad," Warren muttered. "They have nothing on teenage girls." He eyed the wiggling fingers cautiously. "I'm not sure you can ask me to believe that now that you claim everything you say is a lie. It's a contradiction in terms."

“Uh-uh. Not a teenager anymore,” Cammie said, waving a green finger. Something had her in a good mood, and it was fun to really rail into people when she could, “And I said almost everything. Not everything.”

"You can't be far off it," he said with a little bit of a laugh. "You've certainly got the brattyness down pat. I remember it well." Though she didn't really have a patch on some of the others around here. "If you expect people to believe you some of the time, you'll probably find that goes a lot better if you're honest more frequently."

“Fuck you,” Cammie said, “That’s no fun at all.”

"Thought we already established that wasn't going to happen," Warren replied. "And there are better way to get your kicks, honestly." Pun intended.

“Oh there is indeed. I get kicked by Logan once a week. That’s a good way to get my kicks.”

"... no that's insanity. Why would you want to do something like that?"

“Because I love learning how to kick ass and take names from a professional at kicking ass and taking names. And I can honestly say, he’s one of maybe two people who can stand up to the fist of death so I don’t have to worry about, I don’t know, accidentally killing him,” Cammie said, still brightly. Fighting also put her in an extremely good mood, “Oh, did I mention it’s fun as hell? In an oh-my-god-you-sadistic-sensei sort of way.”

"So are you planning on joining the X-Men then?" In Warren's experience, people didn't usually do all this training unless it was for something like that.

Cammie snorted, “Fuck no.”

"Then why learn to fight?"

“Because I like it,” Cammie said.

"Well you've certainly chosen the right mentor for that." Warren was definitely not Logan's biggest fan, and hadn't been for a long time.

“Yeah. He’s damn good at what he does,” Cammie said, “And it’s nice to be able to not worry about accidentally killing him.”

Warren smirked a little. "Yes, I imagine it would be." Though privately, Warren thought Logan could do with it a little. "I'm going to get some coffee, would you like some?" He'd need coffee to get him through the morning.

“Depends, are you going to somewhere that will let me spike it with arsenic?” Cammie asked, “Mine, not yours. I don’t know you well enough to want to kill you.”

"Was just going to hit the kitchen, I'm hoping the coffee here is still half decent." He flashed Cammie another grin. "Let's hope I can keep that going, shall we?"

“Eh, all that means is I don’t overly care if you’re alive or dead,” she said, “But I’ll make myself something in the kitchen. I have me an appetite now.”

"Not sure I would go all that well if you decided you did care I was dead," he said with a little smirk. "But I'll take my chances for now."