xp_logs | Manuel and Yvette, backdated to last Friday morning

x-penance.livejournal.com posting in

Following the TMI comment thread, Manuel goes to talk to Yvette, who is doing some serious bottling. It's possible he regrets it.

Dangling his keys in between his fingers, Manuel slipped them into his pocket as he walked into the mansion. Now that Valentia was at school, he had a good portion of the day to work at home. And although he was intent on working, earlier emotions from another gave way to priority and he found himself turning and heading in the direction to the emotions he was following. Already he knew the signature, as it was someone he kept a distant emotional check on now and then but this gave him pause. Troubling emotions that had him entering the library and seating himself across a certain young lady that was known to keep her emotions in check.

"Hello, Penny."

She glanced up from where she was 'concentrating' on her maths homework, the over-sized pencil in her long fingers skidding across the paper. "Oh!" she exclaimed, startled, then recovered, giving him a small smile. "Hello, Mr. Manuel."

"Manuel," he corrected. At least she didn't call him Mr. de la Rocha. "Homework so early in the morning?" he asked, reaching across and lifting the book to see what it was she was studying. "Math especially."

"It seemed like the good a time as any?" she replied, shrugging a little. "And if I spend too much time in the woods, people say I am running away from things. So I came here instead."

"In the library where peace of mind should come and yet--" he paused and leaned back in his seat, smoothing a hand over the surface of the table. "Normally I do not intervene, however, this is not the first time."

Yvette stared back at him, wide-eyed. "Not the first time for what, please?" she asked, honestly not realising what he meant - the language barrier sometimes meant she needed things stated plainly. Unless it was a poetry book.

"This-" he gestured to her overall persona and settled his hand back down on the table, holding her gaze. "--Whatever it is that is causing you to feel this way. Since your recovery, the trip back, things have changed in you." She might have not realized it but Manuel did and he recognized changes that weren't always healthy to tighten a cap over.

"Oh." She looked down at her math book, embarrassed and ashamed. "I am sorry, Manuel, if my feelings are disturbing you or Valentia. I have been trying to control them, but sometimes it is not so easy." Like when everyone was talking about sex and dating on the journals. Even Kevin, who was at least able to kiss.

"You could not possibly shield from me, although do not worry about Valentia. I shield her myself whenever she is here, therefore, that is nothing of your concern. However, what should be is your growing sense of isolation. This is distressing."

"It is not so bad," she hastened to say, not wanting him to worry about her when he had so many other responsibilities. "It is just..." Her eyes flared brighter with embarassment. "I have these... feelings. About boys." She managed to say that much before her normal reticence about anything to do with sex kicked in and she looked back down at the table again, clasping her long hands together so she didn't wind up shredding her homework.

This conversation came much sooner than Manuel expected and it was supposed to be with his sister. "Yes?" he encouraged, wanting to fully understand before he addressed this.

"It is not... in that way," she hastened to add. "I would not, until I was married. But sometimes I am wondering what it would be like to have the boyfriend, yes? To be able to hold hands and to kiss and hug? Most of the time it is easy to not think of, but sometimes, when people are talking about it..." She sighed. "I know they are not meaning to, but it makes me feel like the freak."

Manuel held his silence, withholding his answer as he gaged what sounded like a question to him. "Isolation on a washboard of envy was never a striking path to take but a blow to the ego over and over. It is self inflicting punishment at such an age to think you are freak around the others however it is not uncommon."

Her brow furrowed as she tried to work out exactly what he was saying. "I have asked before that people not talk about the sex on the journals," she pointed out, at last. "It does not work. They just think I am being the prude." Which she was, but it wasn't the only reason.

"And they are being crude," Manuel supplied. "You are not being a prude, you were raised elsewhere, where such liberties were not taken for... granted. If we want to go back to basics, call it a cultural separation if you will. I like it even less than you do, although that does not make me a prude. There is a time and place for everything."

"I try." Yvette sighed again. "I do not understand... it was not so difficult for me before, when I was first here. Why am I feeling this way now? Sometimes it seems all I can be thinking of is the boys."

"Because you are watching a group flaunt it freely where as in our countries, it is not an acceptable form of conversation. You are also young and going through some... physical changes, becoming a lady rather than a little girl."

"Oh!" Again the brightening of her eyes that signified a blush. "I... did not think of it that way. It is, as they say in the biology class, the hormones? But it feels like the real feelings!" Obviously Yvette tended to seperate biology from romance. "Perhaps if I ask Laurie, should could be making it go away?"

"I believe that would be a temporary solution to a much better problem. You need to adjust, be aware. This is your transition into adulthood and just because others feel the need to throw themselves all over the internet, does not mean you need to." The corner of Manuel's mouth twitched only once and he shifted his gaze to others coming into the library, then back to her.

"Consider it like another power that everyone gets. You manifest, in a manner of speaking, and need a period of adjustment. It is all relative." Really, Hank should be having this conversation with her. He was sure Blue would have done a much better job.

"Seventeen is very old to be having the transition," she almost grumped. "And it is not like I have not been having the physical changes already. It is just the boy thing."

"This boy thing is a very small change in your otherwise vast ability to adapt. What you have is a purity no other will ever have. Call it a clarity if you will. A less selfish motive, driven by the need to do well for what you cannot take so freely. It gives perspective where others would be blind to it."

She ducked her head shyly. "I do not know exactly what you mean, but it sounds nice," she replied, glancing up wiith a small smile. "Thank you, for listening to me. I do not think I would have said anything to anyone if you had not asked."

"You are welcome." Manuel stood but his fingers rested on the table, pushing in the chair before he would leave. He tapped the desk in thought, hesitation there where normally it wasn't. "If you... should need to talk again. I am here."

"I would like that," she replied, far more readily than to be expected from the shy girl. "It is helping, knowing you are understanding what I am feeling, even if I cannot show it or talk about it. Although," she added, "I will try to make sure I do not give you the headache!"