Jake and Remy | Expense Report Shenanigans

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Jake drops off an expense report with Remy, once again demonstrating a complete lack of understanding of what "T&E Budget" means.

"Please tell me dat dis is your attempt at fiction." Remy looked up from the expense sheet and scowled at Jake. The younger man had been coming off the end of an extended trip - seven locations in five days - and had dropped up the information collected along with his expense form at the office before heading home. It was his bad luck that LeBeau was there at the time, and decided to check Gavin's numbers before he could flee.

As good as Jacob Gavin was at fleeing the scene, he did occasionally slip up. Blame this time on faulty intel that he hadn't expected Remy to be around. His attention drifted to the paperwork, ignoring the scowl. "You wound me," he said with a dramatic sigh. "I mean, if I was making this up, it'd be at least twice that much. Besides," he continued, circling around to lean against the back of the chair. "The receipts are all there. Well, except for the five hundred euro I gave Josef. And his info wasn't even that good. Which reminds me, I'm going to need to spend some time in Berlin sometime soon. I got a couple leads on new contacts, and we definitely could use them."

"I'm not dat worried 'bout your operational expenses." Remy replied, honestly. Intelligence was a field where you often paid too much for too little, and there was no way around it. "It's de two Tom Ford Gucci suits. Or dis bill for three hundred euros from Pierre Herme. Did you have a contact dat could only be bribed via expensive chocolate?"

"I keep telling you," Jake explained, shrugging off any responsibility for the line items. "that if we had a decent wardrobe department, I wouldn't need to expense these kind of things. And you'd be surprised how much more information a perfectly timed bonbon will get you. I think I have a box leftover, if it would help that go down easier," he offered with a nod toward the report.

Remy's expression was best described as 'not impressed', but he willed himself to not overreact. It wasn't his money, and frankly, Jake had always abused his expenses in order to indulge in his expensive tastes. "I think dat we're going to consider you suggestion a little more closely. After all, if you need to buy dese things on de fly, dat means we're not providing enough support going into de mission. Plus, if we source some things ahead of time, Remy sure dat Emma's connections can provide a suitable imitation."

"I'm not sure 'suitable' and 'imitation' ever go together," Jake shook his head disapprovingly. "But if you want to have them give it a go, I'll look over whatever they come up with. Of course, I'll know I'm in a cheap knock off, but I'm sure it won't affect my performance."

"Course." Jake distaste did not go unnoticed; he'd worked with Gavin long enough to know that when given an inch, he'd take, well, your wallet. It was important to give enough rope to work and not enough to hang himself. "Dodgy expenses aside, what's de environment like out dere?"

"Pretty much the normal holiday vamping," Jake answered. "Lots of money being thrown around, but not a lot of real movement. Everyone's stalling until the new year." Despite his apparent distaste, anyone who knew Jake well knew he was the first to join that excuse for a spending spree. "On the plus side, though, I have enough comedic material to fill an entire TSA act. Think I'll call it 'The Freedom Pat.'"

"Remember de last time you tried to seduce a customs agent? Switzerland, wasn't it?"

"Remy." Jake rolled his eyes. "When was the last time you flew commercial? I mean, what could I possibly get from trying to seduce the TSA? Another five minutes of groping? Swiss Customs, on the other hand..." he trailed off, looking up at the ceiling as a half-smile appeared on his face. "Well, maybe not that time, but...let's just say there's been other passports that have been...greenlighted for at least the next decade."
"Remy go over de definition of 'undercover' again wit' you later." He shook his head. "What about our old friends in Germany? We still don't know how many active accounts Strucker had, and dere de only way to track what's left of his network."

"Why Mr. LeBeau," Jake said, lifting his hand to his chest. "All this time, I never knew you cared..." He paused a minute before continuing. "Munich was more or less a rabbit hole, mostly chasing just to find stuff we already knew. Nothing really hot, but a couple possibilities that point back to Berlin--I'll do some digging next time I'm there."

Remy thought for a second, tapping his fingers on the table. "You know what, let's pull you off de rest of you normal run. One of de others can pick it up. I want you back in Berlin by de end of de weekend. Dere's too many little echoes floating around de network for nothing to be going on, and if we can't chase it down in Zurich, Berlin is de only other epicentre dat we can count on."

"End of the weekend? What, can't a guy sleep in his own bed two nights in a row?" Of course, one could hardly expect that to get by without a complaint. Then again, Jake often complained about things, whether he minded or not. "Fine, fine, fine. At least you're footing the bill. I agree, it does seem suspiciously quiet."

"Bein. Just a point; you being affronted would work a lot better if you actually ever slept in you bed two nights in a row when you are here in New York." Remy said, a little archly. "Besides, you understand more 'bout international banking and moving money through unorthodox means den anyone else I have available."

Jake couldn't help but laugh at that. "Touché. And true," he added after a moment. "I was thinking I'd spend a couple weeks there, for now at least. I want to work on ties with a couple of contacts there. I did get a lead on one of Strucker's old research librarians that I think is living there now. One of the on-the-books ones, so I doubt she really knew much, but it's the best lead I've got at the moment."

"Chase it down. Best lead we've had in months." Remy said, finally signing the sheet. "And try not to run up another five figure expense sheet. At dis rate, Remy going to have to start being nice to dat Frost in order to get dem paid."

"I'll do my best. No promises, though," Jake said, pushing the chair in as he started to leave. Was that the slightest bit of relief in his voice now that the expenses had been signed? "After all, you're the one that's approving a ticket to Berlin with less than a week's notice.

"Don`t tempt me to send you as cargo, Gavin."

"At least there'd be more legroom," Jake said, then quickly took his leave before Remy might have had a chance to change his mind. Or to offer more specific instructions. Always better to ask forgiveness than permission was one Jacob Gavin's motto.