Laura, Vanessa & Jean-Paul | Tuesday

[x-copycat.livejournal.com]

Vanessa and Laura talk about the young woman killing two people the night before and what that means for the genetically engineered girl. Jean-Paul conveniently shows up after the emotional talk is over, just in time for Knot Work 101

The X-Factor offices were blissfully empty in the middle of the day for once. Vanessa had finished the paperwork for that whole Porter situation and everything was up on the database. There were no pending cases for the time being as far as she knew. Relaxation, how novel. Someone had to be in the office in case someone dropped by or they got phonecalls. Technically Vanessa could always forward calls to her phone downstairs in her apartment. Then again, the soup she wanted was up here. Clearly, the futon was going to win out once she had hot soup in a bowl and that bowl in hand. It was nice to have these sorts of priorities sometimes.

She had no need to be around the zone, but Laura had taken the sudden calm after their last mission as a chance to stay around in the city for a little longer. It was, in a way, quieter than the mansion. It also meant she didn't need to deal right away to putting a happy face around her friends...and Kevin. She wasn't sure when she had put the boy in a different category, but really, what were they? She wasn't entirely sure she wanted to know, because she could see a limited set of options, and all of them were either upsetting...or terrifying. So back at the offices it was.

She hadn't expected to find anyone there though, but Vanessa's scent signaled her before she opened the door, as well as the smell of the soup. "Hello," she called as she entered slowly, giving the woman a little smile. "Don't you ever get tired of hanging around here?"

"It's business hours and I live downstairs. I'm not allowed to get tired of it," Vanessa told her with a bit of a smile. This place was sort of her baby in a way, though. Even if she did get sick of the around the clock hours she kept here it was worth it because it was hers. It was hers and she would make it work because it helped people. "You up to no good? I think there's left overs from the last time Laurie got culinary around here." The metamorph took up residence on the futon, legs folded under her. She looked positively cozy curled up there with the steaming bowl. "And what are you doing around here anyway? I don't think you're on a job for us at all and don't you have friends and shit you'd want to see while you've got down time for who knows how long?"

"And that's why we are so happy to follow you around, oh fearless leader," Laura said with the hint of a grin that lasted no longer than the duration of the phrase; then she just went pensive. Laura shrugged dismissively at her questions, and then headed for the fridge, scavenging some chicken that was still edible. "I didn't feel like going back so fast," she said as she picked a chair and sat next to the futon while the food spun on the microwave. She opened her mouth to say something, but thought better of it and closed it again, making her feel weird, so she looked away from Vanessa.

"I've got an extra bedroom downstairs if you need to appropriate it for a while," Vanessa offered without so much as a second thought about. After all, Laura had become one of her people once Vanessa had asked for her help on a job and then offered her a part-time position at the agency. She took care of her people, even if she didn't always agree with what they wanted to do. She was watching the young woman even as Laura stared off in a direction pointedly not near Vanessa. "But just for the record, hiding out from your friends is a stupid idea. In my experience family - including the kind of friends who transcend simple friendship - are what keep you sane. And you can't hide from yourself anyway. But if you don't have friends like that back at the mansion," she shrugged one shoulder with a small tilt of her head, "you're still family around here. Even if stoic papa bear makes it less obvious than the rest of us."

Laura snorted, but at least she turned back to Vanessa, and this time her smile was perhaps closer to the real thing. Funny thing, her mind wasn't ruling out the woman's offer so quickly. "I just..." Well, it was the beginning of a sentence that sounded important, at least? "I hadn't really killed anyone before." It came in a rather dispassionate way, obviously on purpose, because otherwise she would start to freak out about it. "I didn't know what to expect, how it was going to feel. Now I'm a bit lost about it, so I don't want to arrive home and have to fake a smile and my usual self while I try to figure things out." And she hadn't refused Vanessa's offer just yet.

"If they're your friends then you shouldn't have to fake anything anyway. If you do then you ditch them and get better friends. No one's worth keeping around if they only like the sunny side." Her words were strong, confident and made it clear she would accept no disagreement with her on the topic. You loved all of a person or none of them. She may have lived in the grey a lot morally and ethically but that one Vanessa was strictly black and white on. "We've all got dark sides, even if that doesn't involve killing for most people."

Silence descended between the pair while Vanessa ate a spoonful of soup and considered her options. She'd wanted to talk to Laura about the kills once she'd read the reports Bishop had uploaded to the database, but she hadn't been sure how to broach the topic. Laura broaching it for her had made things easier. "The first time I killed someone was in battle. It was messy. I was terrified, eighteen and covered in blood by the end of it, none of it my own. And it was jarring in a big way. I was a mercenary in a war. It was kill or be killed. You had a choice of killing, wounding or simply disabling. Why did you choose to go for the kill?"

Laura's legs went up, chin resting on her knees as she listened for a moment. Well, it did make sense, and she supposed it was something she could take from Vanessa. "I know I have good friends. I think it might make me not good enough to be their friend, actually. Or that it would make things...weird." Or weirder, depending on who she thought. How would Cammie react if she knew she had killed two men? Would she congratulate her? Throw her out of the room? Stare in disbelief? She was the person she saw the most, and the one that, one way or another, had to deal with her usual sunny disposition, no matter how much of a major bitch she was; Laura wasn't even sure why she considered Cammie a friend, but she realized she was terrified to think of the green haired girl rejecting her. Kevin, on the other hand...she forced herself not to think about that.

The girl's eyes went cold, and she seemed to freeze on her spot. Although it was Laura who spoke, she sounded and acted in a way it would have made people laugh if someone else told them just how she acted daily. "It was, clean. Fast, easy. I was scared it would feel good, once the adrenaline wasn't pumping through my veins, but there was...nothing I wasn't scared, or happy, or even remorseful." Laura bit her lip, bringing some emotion back to her face, even if it wasn't precisely positive. "Half my reasoning was to avoid a fight on our way out, but the other half...I just realized it would be simpler.

"It was," Vanessa confirmed. She was watching Laura intently. The shift in her demeanor was unusual and it made the metamorph wonder where it came from. Maybe she was compartmentalizing the actions. It was a sort of defense mechanism a lot of people embraced and Vanessa couldn't exactly fault her for it. When she spoke there was no judgement in her voice just as there had been none of her face. Vanessa looked for all the world like they were chatting about what had been on television the night before. "We needed to minimize the risk to us but also to anyone else there who was innocent, like all those girls we wound up finding there with Katie. If they lived they could track us down and come back for revenge for themselves or their employer. They could also bring police attention on us. Taking them out permanently was both more effective and easier. But I was a mercenary for almost ten years and that life rescued me. Jean-Paul's head is sort of fucked up, but you wouldn't know it now not having known him before. Bishop was a cop. Generally if Bishop starts shooting to kill anything else will fuck you over. He doesn't kill if he doesn't have to usually."

Head tiling to the side, Vanessa considered Laura for a while. "Most people wouldn't jump to the kill. That's what I find interesting. You're terribly efficient for someone who was never trained to be lethal. Unless you did more than just wave pompoms as a cheerleader and that's gotten more cutthroat than it was when I was a kid."

"A part of me wants to believe all that, but the other part keeps yelling in my head that killing is wrong," emotions betrayed her a little, her voice taking a bit of a pitched tone in the end. She had done what she needed to, but she didn't feel good about it. The thing was, she didn't feel bad about it either, and that was throwing her off. She should feel bad, right? That would at least serve as proof she wasn't a merciless killer. Or was she?

With a wry grin, Laura popped a claw. "It's in my blood, my genes. I wasn't conceived as my mother's burning desire to have a little girl of her own." She was the daughter of a living, walking, thinking weapon, as much as it hurt to accept that. And while Laura didn't believe that her family could make her something different, she did believe in mutations and how she liked the chase, the tease, and how it all seemed to sum up on the kill. "I've trained since I could stand. Nothing lethal; sports, self defense classes, some martial arts. I've always been...physical. I just never had the chance to express that. And I learn fast." She had learned from India, for instance, where she had to fight someone who would have killed her if he hadn't decided to toy around with her. If she were to fight Black Light again -if he survived, that is- she would take him down before he could even focus on her.

"Killing is wrong. I could explain my own moral code to you, but it probably wouldn't do you much good to help you figure out what yours is. Killing is bad but if it's you or someone else you pick the person trying to kill you. If it's the guy who rapes children then why feel bad about it? If it's a man responsible for genocide then it's practically honorable. There's shades of grey all over this stuff. Weird to adjust to, but nothing's as black and white as people would like you to believe. But you've always got the choice of whether you do it or not." Just like Vanessa had the choice over whether or not she put Laura in situations where it may come up. The girl was clearly conflicted over her own actions and that was good. It proved she wasn't actually a sociopath under it all.

"As for your blood, genetics aren't everything, kid. You are the things you do. The things you do are choices you make. Your genetics can engineer a coldblooded killer and you could turn out to be an exterminator who runs a pet rescue. Seriously, don't put too much stock in eugenics. They've failed numerous people over the years." Vanessa herself had turned out nothing like her mother who still believed Vanessa was some demon that had killed her little girl. She hadn't exactly turned out like her affable father either. She was a product of her environment, of all of them over her life. "People change you. Where you are changes you. Everything changes you. If you don't want to be a killer then don't let yourself. Nothing says you've got to be monster. Nothing says you've got to kill anyone. And no one says you've got to feel bad about killing a guy who was holding kidnapped girls who were going to be smuggled out of the country and forced into prostitution either. They were all scum." On that last note Vanessa sounded emphatically disgusted. It was the first emotion other than casual interest and acceptance she'd displayed since their discussion had taken the turn onto killing.

Somewhere halfway through Vanessa's...speech, Laura had closed her eyes, trying to control her emotions the best she could. Trying to repress them, actually, but it was too hard, there were too much, and she ended up opening her eyes again, watery, and exhaling slowly. "I'm just sorry I killed them, but I feel alright about it. I'm still trying to cope with that." She knew she would, but it wasn't something that would change in the blink of an eye. It wouldn't be real, she thought.


"You think I've got a chance?" Her voice carried an odd tone, as if she were missing air; actually, Laura looked on the verge of tears by now. "D-do you think I can b-be a good person?" She closed her eyes again, the tears still resting on her eyes rolling down now. "That's a-all I want, r-really." Laura lowered her head, but she didn't start crying; she was just holding onto that feeling and trying not to jump at Vanessa and hug her.

Laura didn't need to jump at Vanessa for the hug. It was hard looking at her sitting there so torn up. It was hard to see her struggle with this thing that Vanessa could barely remember having to struggle with now. She knew she'd struggled with it when she'd first joined Mag Ealga and gone to war with them, but now it seemed so long ago to her. A ghost of a memory. The bowl of soup was set down on the table and Vanessa unfolded herself from her spot on the couch so she could kneel in front of the girl on her chair. Her arms went into a loose loop around the younger woman's waist, ready to pull her in closer for a hug if she needed it.

The dim glow of Vanessa's red eyes focused on Laura's eyes and nowhere else. "You feel bad that you don't feel bad. That's a good sign. I think if you were a bad person in the making you wouldn't give a shit that you don't feel bad. You wouldn't even be sorry you killed them. If I can be a relatively good person with my history then you sure as hell can be. You've got guts, kid, and you're strong. And I'm pretty sure stubborn as hell. They all work in your favor. And while we're a morally ambiguous clan here at the X-Factor Investigations agency, we're all decent people. And if all else fails I'll have Laurie pheromonally convert you to girl scout-hood with her." She smiled up at Laura. "Keep yourself around good people and you'll be okay. No one here is going to let you become a monster. And no one outside of here who actually cares about you will either. All else fails I've got an in with this smoking hot redhead who can mind whammy you into a coma for your own good." Actually, she wasn't sure Jean could do that, but it sounded good anyway.

Yes, she was going to go for that hug, letting Vanessa's words mix with the warmth of her skin and the scent of her hair -and the soup- all in one current of positiveness -in Vanessa's very particular sort of way. She had never thought she would need such a thing, but there she was, being needy. She had to be better than that, but she couldn't forget there were people willing to help. It was complicated, and simple. But she had chosen that life. "What's with us morally freaky people pulling each other close?" she joked, head resting on the woman's shoulder for a moment before breaking the hug, albeit slowly. She wasn't sure she knew Vanessa entirely, but she would cherish that gesture forever.

"No girl scouting for me, and I think I'll do without the coma, too." She smiled a little, and wiped the tears from her face. "I...thanks, I think I needed this. To hear it out loud." And she felt better. Not okay, but better. She had time to feel okay. "I won't be taking that offer...not right now, at least." She wanted to keep that option open. "But I think I can stay for the rest of the day here, if you want me to." The chicken in the microwave was most likely cold again by then, but she didn't mind it. It could be solved.

Vanessa was strong for a woman, though she lacked a mutationally augmented strength, and she was the sort who gave firm hugs. Especially when Laura seemed so small in her arms at the time. But she was good and waited until Laura pulled away, then waited a little before letting her arms fall completely. Vanessa folded her arms across Laura's lap and smiled at her. "It's a weird thing. Shady morals, need for hugs. Those weird black and white people never need hugs. Screw them." Her smile turned into a grin. "I know sometimes I'm sort of authoritarian probably, or just ridiculous or whatever, but if you need this again I'm here for it, alright? And the offer remains open. It's possible you might one day need to fight Jean-Paul for that room, though. I think these days he's actually sleeping in his own damn bed but for some reason he loves the futon and he has an open invite on that room if needs or wants it, too." That was Vanessa, collecting lambs so they weren't lost. Maybe that was part of her identity these days, becoming less lost and trying to help find the other lost sorts.

When Laura seemed pretty dry in the tear venue and a little more perked up Vanessa stood. "Yeah, I think I'm going to keep you for today. And don't get me wrong, if I think you're going to be stupid and wander off to be alone all night or with some crappy person who doesn't care about you then I'm going to hold you hostage. And I had genuine sailors teach me how to tie knots, chick." The threat was severely tempered by the obvious humor in Vanessa's voice. Though the threat to keep her there all night was quite genuine.

Laura had to wonder if she would have been any different by growing up if she had met Vanessa before. Probably, but in a way, she had met her in the right time. "I'm going to keep in mind those offers, both of them." It didn't sound remotely close to a threat, so Laura just nodded and smiled a little. "As long as we don't need to run to the room, I think I can compete with him." Although she would perhaps just give it to him, she wasn't so sure. Cocking her head to a side, Laura bit her tongue before she could ask what that meant; did he and Kevin...? Now way. But then again, she could be wrong. She hadn't asked Kevin, mainly because she didn't have a reason to think it was worth asking.

Her smile got considerably brighter when Vanessa 'allowed' her to stay. "Nope, not tonight. Or for a while. I think I'm going to keep the faceless jocks on hold for a little bit. Or get a boyfriend," she added, with another snort and air quotes included. "Can you teach me some of those knots? You never know when you might need to tie someone down." And she wasn't even thinking about sex, actually.

"Aye, I can teach you some. I'm not sure I have rope or anything rope-like up here, though. If I don't then you're on phone duty while I go downstairs." She drank down her now cooled soup most of the way and then went in search. "Are you getting a fake boyfriend? Is he a beard? Is he really a girl and that's why he gets air quotes? For the record, I'm in favor of boyfriends." That happy tone was very blatant in her voice. Vanessa was clearly very fond of her own boyfriend. "Mine actually cooks. Do you know how awesome it is to have a guy who purposely sets out to cook you dinner? I might have to marry him one day just because of that."

Jean-Paul attempted to stealthily make his way into the offices via the window, but he failed because there's really no stealthy way to open a window when you're up that high. It also didn't help matters that the office was occupied, but he disregarded that and wound up closing the window, then locking it, before turning to give the two women there an innocent look. "Bonjour. I think I may have had a heart attack. Was the blue one speaking of marriage?" He looked down at himself. "I think I would not make such a good bridesmaid, mon ami. But I would still like an invitation, oui?"

"Only if you'll wear pink taffeta for me," she told him with a grin. "And I was mostly going on about the wonders of a man who will cook for you. Laura's fake boyfriend needs to know how to cook. And use that skill to feed her. Because a man - or woman - who will feed you is irreplaceable. Especially since Lex is a better cook than I am." Vanessa looked sheepish at that. She could cook noodles and other thing out of boxes but she was pretty limited in her capabilities with raw ingredients without a recipe. And God knew she was too damn lazy to find recipes for anything.

"No problem, I can answer calls and whatever." Although she hoped the woman didn't need to leave, really; it was nice to spend the time with someone else. Laura laughed in a good heartely way at that. "Oh, there is this guy that at least cooks for me, but any other than that, I don't know. And he's not a beard, and he's not a she. Would you believe me if I tell you I'm not into girls...that I know?" There, with that last bit it sounded almost believable. But the idea of marriage sounded like something ridiculously alien to her. White dresses and something new, something, old, something blue...Laura shivered.

In retrospective, it could have been the window that Jean-Paul had opened. "Hm, taffeta." The mental image alone was going to scar her forever, but she couldn't help it. "My fake, and completely imaginary boyfriend might not agree to use taffeta though."

Jean-Paul had to agree - Kevin would most definitely not agree to wear taffeta. The thought of it made his own eye twitch a little, but instead of addressing any of that, he headed over to the refrigerator and pulled the requisite bag of carrots from the crisper. He tossed one to Laura before half-sprawling on the futon. "I do not have the hips for a dress of taffeta," he deadpanned, looking pointedly at the offending body part, then over at Vanessa.

The metamorph paused in her search for rope and stared at Jean-Paul. "Congratulations. You just went up a notch on the queen scale. That is the single gayest thing you've ever said to me." She shook her head as if it would erase the memory of that moment from her head. "Anyway," she pulled out some rope from a desk drawer, "who wants to learn to very securely tie people up?" Vanessa downright beamed.

Jean-Paul blinked, bit a carrot in half, and shook his head. "I think I will watch." He had no idea what had sparked the offer, but the thought of the two of them tying one another up amused him - he could take pictures and text them to others. Or hold them for blackmail later. Also, he'd killed three people the day before and... wasn't particularly interested in being by himself right then.

Laura grabbed the carrot, and then beamed back at Vanessa. "Okay, tie me. Although then I will totally have to practice on you." Little did she know someone else would be taking pics of her. Oh, this was going to end well.