X-Men Mission: Roller Derby Queen

[x-dominion.livejournal.com]

There doesn't seem to be an end to the series of strange conversations for Garrison as he goes looking for Bobby.



“Bobby, you got a sec?” Garrison said as he rapped on the side of Drake’s suite doorframe. He had a stack of printouts under one arm, and a slightly curious expression on his face. It had actually started during an email conversation with Marie. She regularly touched base on her investigation into the WEAPON X hints. He’d half-jokingly passed along his most recent challenge and she’d sent him a cryptic message to talk to Bobby Drake about it. Women. They couldn’t just come out and say it, could they?

"Hold on just a sec." Bobby quickly rolled off of his couch and shoveled a few final bites of Captain Crunch in his mouth before setting his bowl on the table and heading for the door. Whistling slightly he pulled the door open. A smirk instantly growing on his face when he saw the man on the other side. "Sup Garrison?" He crossed his arms over his chest. "You here to catch the Red Sox game with me, or talk to me about going to another small town where I might git myself melted?" He chuckled slightly. His last mission with Garrison was still fresh in his mind.

"Fuck, after the last Red Sox series? Only if the game involves dropping a truck on Jed Lowrie from a great height. A big truck. In fact, a very big truck." Kane said, following the man into the room. "Right, this is going to sound weird, but I've got this thing. Underground blood sport-like mutant roller derby. All kinds of fucked up. We're trying to put together a team that can replace a gang one that the Bureau took down a couple of days ago. The problem is that we have the mutants, but no one here has any clue how to play."

Garrison paused, and then sighed. "Look, Marie said I should talk to you about it. I have no idea why, and she didn't tell me anything else. Are you some secret roller derby fanatic or something?"

Bobby's face instantly went white at the mention of roller derby. "I... uh... I..." His eyes were quickly darting back and forth as his mind was obviously trying to piece together something that just wasn't coming. "I have no idea why she would mention me when it came to roller derby. I have no idea at all." His eyes instantly shot to the side as he started sweating more than Barry Bonds on a Grand Jury trial. As he began to gather up his bowl to turn towards the kitchen, he instantly thought Why did Marie have to bring it up to someone that investigates people for a living. Not that it mattered. A five year old that played Heavy Rain once could notice something was up.

"Alright Drake. You're a lousy liar." Kane said, although even Molly could have picked up his suddenly evasive gestures. "Out with it. Otherwise, I'm just going to call Marie."

Bobby let out a sigh as he shook his head from side to side. "She didn't tell you about the outfits did she? Please tell me she didn't mention anything about the outfits." He had to make sure how much Garrison knew before he went blabbering off at the mouth.

Outfits? What the fuck had Marie just dropped him into? "She mentioned she had pictures of the outfits." Kane said cautiously, lying through his teeth.

Bobby swallowed hard as what was left of the color in his face drained out. Not the outfits. "I may or may not know a thing or two about roller skating." He shifted his head to the side. "I may or may not know a lot about roller skating." He forced a small grin on his face as he did his best to avoid Garrison's sightline, trying to save some dignity. "You may or may not be looking at the 1997 Massachusetts Under 14 Year Old Roller Dancing Champion..."

"Roller Dancing..." Garrison said slowly, trying to stop the grin that was already trying to take over his face. The idea of Bobby Drake, no doubt in some kind of mother mandated spangled costume, competing in roller dance competitions was simultaneously hilarious and frightening. He coughed twice. "Uh, well- uh, I can see why Marie mentioned you. State Champion, eh? That's- well, you must have been good."

Bobby moved his tongue into his cheek as he hoped that he could at least quell some of the jawing he was sure would come. "It was real manly Roller skating. I danced to Aerosmith. Lots of fire in the background..." He let his voice drift off as his eyes slunk to the side. "So you were talking about blood sports and all that macho stuff earlier?"

"Yeah, see, that's not what I need you for." Kane was still trying to stifle the grin, and Aerosmith almost put him over the edge. Just the thought of Bobby dressed like Steven Tyler on a pair of roller skates... was there a boa? "You saw the information up on the team comm. We're not going to be able to just crash the party in our X-Men uniforms. We need to identify the players at the event so the FBI can target them; snatch up as many suspects all at once. To do that, we need to infiltrate the event... as members of the gang with our team. We've got the ladies, but no one around here knows the sport enough to give them a crash course. Turns out Alison used to participate in a team, but she's not recovered enough to go into the field. She has sent all her old playbooks to us."

"And you want me to be Coach Bombay." Bobby nodded his head slightly. "Gotcha." He slowly began to raise his hand up to his chin. "So who do you need me to train? Some group of FBI mercenary girls who are gonna be going in there to kick some ass and take some names?" Bobby grinned as he thought of his team of bruisers Kane surely had arranged.

"Coach Bom- what? Are you on glue?" Garrison said, perching on the corner of Bobby's couch. "No, no. The Bureau barely has any mutant agents as is, much less women that fit the profile. I was thinking about recruiting a team a little bit closer to home."
Bobby snorted a bit before quickly raising his hand up in front of his face. "Sorry about that, I just pictured Hank on roller skates and a bikini top." He had to smile for a second before he could shake the image out of his mind. "So let me get this straight, you want me to take a motley crew of our mutants, train them in roller derby, and then take them out against blood-thirsty mutants that beat the hell out of other girls for a living?"

"Pretty much. Oh, did I mention the part that you'll be coaching them from the middle of a track surrounded by jacked up and likely armed and drunk bikers and drug smugglers?"

"Oh, well I just assumed that one..." Bobby grinned as his voice trailed off. "Well it's not exactly a Disney movie, but if we can find some girls that can at least stand up on skate, I guess I could always give it a whirl." He leaned forward. "Provided you make one promise to me."

"Before you ask it, please consider very carefully the fact that I can arrest you."

"I'll put myself at harms way, train our girls to look better and more viscous on skates than Tonya Harding, and I'll help do anything to finish these arrests..." He put his heads in his hands. "As long as no one... NO ONE... finds out about the roller dancing thing."

Garrison paused and then nodded. While the embarrassment value was potentially huge, he needed Bobby's help. "You got a deal, Drake."

"Then all I need is that playbook and a prayer." Bobby smiled. "But at least I won't find myself with a melted chest this time."