xp_logs | Angelo and Paige

Angelo had found himself a nice quiet spot in the grounds with a bench, and was sitting on it working his way through his entire stash of cigarettes. As he smoked, he stared into the distance, going over what Amanda had said in his mind.

Paige came up behind him, resting a hand on his shoulder. She had spotted him from a window inside and the look on his face didn't especially spell out glee. "Trying to support the entire tobacco company, huh?"

Angelo jumped, startled, when she put her hand on his shoulder, having not heard her coming. "Paige! Hey. Yeah, I guess so".

Swinging around the bench she settled comfortably next to him, her hand never leaving his shoulder. "Any reason for the sudden lung cancer desire?"

He ducked his head suddenly, frowning. "Just had some stuff to think about."

"Mhm..." Paige hummed thoughtfully as her fingers made absent patterns on his jacket. "Private thinking or something I can help with?"

"I don't know", he answered. "Maybe you could help with some of it..."

Paige gave him a half, quiet smile, looking up at him. "Well. You'd have to let me in on it, puppy."

He sighed, not looking at her. "Promise you won't get mad before I've finished."

"I'll try my best," she answered honestly.

He nodded, knowing that was all she could promise. "Okay. I was talkin' to... someone... an' they brought somethin' up that I've thought sometimes before." He sighed again, and plunged into it. "Jono treats you so bad, Paige. You know he does, but you still love him as much as you do me, you've told me that. An' I don't blame you for it at all - but he treats you like that, an' I'd do anythin' for you, an' you still love him as much as me - an' all I can think is it says somethin' about how much I'm worth. Not to you, how much I'm worth..."

There was an icy pause where Paige removed her hand from his shoulder and placed it in her lap. "You can't have it both ways, Angelo. If you've just said you're judging how much you're worth by how I'm supposedly treating you, then you can't go saying it's not how much you're worth to me." There was an awful grinding noise that was Paige's teeth against each other as she tried to calm herself. "Perhaps he does treat me badly. But he's always been there for me, Angelo. All those times where you went and almost got yourself killed, he was the one who brought me back to bed. So really, who treats me worse; the one who says he loves me and then repeatedly gets himself put in the medlab, killing me every time, or the one who won't say it, which is just as painful, but never goes and gets himself hurt?" She shrugged, looking out into the distance, the trees.

"I never said it was how you were treatin' me", Angelo pointed out quietly. "I even said I didn't blame you for it, an' I don't. An' I've been in the medlab twice, once only for a night, which I couldn't've done anythin' about." He was still not looking at her. "An' while we're on the subject, which of us sat in the medlab for four days when you were hurt?" He hated himself for saying that last, but she'd hit a nerve and he couldn't help himself.

Paige's neck snapped to fix him with narrowed eyes. "Don't you dare start blaming him for that. He thought a mob was going to come after him. He did what he could." She returned her gaze to the safer spot of the trees, hands fisting her scarf with white knuckles. "Whatever. You're worth a lot to me. Not that you believe it, anyway."

"Paige, are you even listenin' to me?" he asked with frustration. "Did I not say I didn't mean what I was worth to you? I meant in general - I'm damaged goods an' I know it, an' I fuck up, an' I hurt you, an' I don't think I'm worth much!" The last was almost whispered, urgently.

Paige jumped at that, something in his words hitting a little too close to home, literally. "Well, if you're worth something to me then you're obviously worth something in general," she said stubbornly. "How am I supposed to convince you otherwise?"

He shrugged helplessly. "I don't know", he said quietly. "Just... don't leave me?"

Paige tilted her head to rest on his shoulder. "Wasn't ever planning on it."

Angelo nodded, slipping an arm around her. "Good." He added, almost under his breath, "Not sure I could take that..."

"You'd survive, like you always do. You're tough like that," she replied softly.

"Probably", he acknowledged. "But I think I'd have to leave here - an' there's only one place I could go."

"I'm not the only thing keeping you here." Her voice was quiet and held an edge of doubt.

"Not the only thing, no", he said wearily. "But the most important thing."

She couldn't help but smile a little at that, lifting her head from his shoulder to kiss his cheek. "Don't leave if anything happens to me. Promise?"

He turned to look at her honestly. "I can't promise that. I'll stay if I can." He sighed, pulling her closer into his arms. "I love you so much."

"Love you too, puppy." Paige closed her eyes, enjoying his warmth, his closeness. "Just try. I guess that's all I can ask for."

"Well, I promise to try", he assured her softly, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Best I can do."

She smiled a little, almost tiredly. "Okay."

Angelo sighed, drawing her closer until she was almost in his lap. "How've you been, anyway?"

"I've been all right. I think we're all starting to feel a little confined, though." Paige tucked an ankle behind his. "Other than abnormally idiotic people telling you lies, how are you?"

Angelo shrugged, holding her securely. "Best as can be expected, I guess. Things just got too much today, y'know? People tellin' me lies..."

Paige nodded, watching their fingers thread and unthread. "No one could blame you for it." She paused. "You're not going to tell me who it was are you?"

Angelo sighed. "Only if you promise not to go off on one. We've got enough conflict here already..."

"You know I can't promise that," she replied easily. "Actually, I can only promise you that if I do catch word of his or her name I will be getting a lot of practice on my clawed metal husk. So it's probably better if you don't tell me anyway."

He nodded, having expected something along those lines. "Probably, yeah. Wouldn't want that."

"Well. You wouldn't want that." Paige smiled a little and let herself rest.

"Can't say I'd mind, actually, in theory", he told her bitterly. "But if you actually did it, you'd be in trouble, an' I don't want that on my account."

"Mm. Let's be quiet now," Paige said suddenly, bringing their hands up to her mouth for a kiss. "It's pretty outside today and I'd like to enjoy it with you."

Angelo smiled. "Quiet is good." He slipped his arm around her again to tuck her warmly into his side, stealing a kiss as he did so.