xp_logs | Paige/Jono, Sunday night, all night.

Backdated to March 15th. Right after the bonding moment with Angelo.

English television wasn't very good. Too many commercials in an accent that she only understood half of the time. Late night television was awful.They talked faster then, and it was mostly infomercials. Paige was getting very sick of infomercials. But, she seemed to have developed the worst case of jet lag ever -- how many hours had they been here after all - - and she couldn't sleep. So, instead, she was sitting in her hotel room, flipping channels boredly in a coma-like state and hoping that sooner or later she would drift off.

It was probably because of her half-in-dream mindset that Paige didn't even blink when her door opened and shut quietly, nor at the sudden second glow in the room. She had given her spare room keys to Angelo and Jono, and unless room terrorists had taken to having holes in their chests, there was only one other solution.

"Heart?"

"Sunshine."

There was a damp splat as Jono's leather jacket hit the floor and two thumps as his shoes flew somewhere into the dark. Without further ceremony he crossed over to the bed and folded next to it on the floor, staring at the telly. He stared at it for a moment, then picked up the remote from Paige's lax hand and continued the channel surfing she had started. Although it was obvious he wasn't paying the least bit attention to what was going on when he clicked the buttons.

"I had a smoke," he said after a while.

Fingers absently finding Jono's hair, Paige wrung the last of the wet that clung to the tips out and onto the carpet before running gentle circles up to his temple. She tried to keep a fairly neutral face, but Jono's current state wasn't doing much for her and her attempts not to worry. Concern didn't hide very well underneath the blue of her eyes.

"Did you now?" she finally replied, the flickering of the television not managing to hold her gaze. "And however did you manage that?"

"I did," he asserted, leaning his head on the edge of the bed, turning slightly towards her, eyes only half open. "Angelo helped a bit."

The television fizzed in front of them, something unimportant and already forgotten on its screen, just a competing light source. Jono had let the remote slip from his fingers onto the floor when Paige had touched him, ceasing in his frantic channel hopping.

"He let me.. it was like second hand smoking, just without the smoke," he tried to explain then.

She wanted him in her arms more than anything right then and gently pulled his hand to her. Paige could slip to the floor if she needed to, but considering he had just emptied most of the the storm from outside onto her carpet it wasn't all that appealing.

"Mhm... Like Emma." Her tone of voice had gone into her chest, warm and low. "With the food." She didn't mention that she'd offered the same thing and been denied. It wasn't really the time for that right now. "That was very nice of him..."

He pressed her hand to his temple, closing his eyes. "Yeah, something like that." He was quiet then, just seeming to soak up her presence as if she really was sunshine and he was somehow able to get warm.

But she didn't really glow, and couldn't remove the pictures from behind his eyes. Or the pain of having lost family and friends. He curled up tighter against the bed and clutched at her hand like he was suddenly drowning. "I love you," he said faintly. "Never let me hurt you."

Paige blinked focus back into her eyes, sudden tears brushed away. So this was what broadcasting was. "You never will, heart. I love you, too." She bent over, hair falling from behind her ear to brush against his shoulder, and kissed his ear. Her hand turned his face slightly to look at her. "Come off the floor?"

"I'm good here," Jono protested, opening his eyes a bit to look at her. "My clothes are all wet, you don't want me on your bed," he continued, smoothing his thumb across the back of her hand. There was chipped black polish left on his nails, obviously the subject of industrious boredom. He lifted his other hand to cup her cheek. "I want you to come see the city lights with me."

"I wouldn't mind." Paige smiled at him gently, tilting her head to rest against his hand. She was telling the truth, she really wouldn't. In fact, this felt not quite right at the moment, him so far away when he could be so close.

Her smile brightened as he continued, another form of light in the dim room. "Right now?" she asked, turning her head just a hair to kiss the skin between his finger and thumb. "Like this?" Her hand gestured to her pyjamas and his lack of shirt. "Or is it custom to run about in your night clothes on this side of the ocean?"

Compelled by her smile and promise of closeness, Jono nodded and hitched himself up on the bed, sitting with one foot tucked under him and the other hanging off the edge. If there was something he liked about his mutation, it was how Paige's hair looked in its light, all golden.

"Not right now," he clarified. "But later." He looked down at their joined hands, hair falling lankly into his eyes. "I hate that I can only hold your hand. I hate that Angelo can kiss you, but I'll never be able to. I hate that I'm scared all the time, and that my parents can hardly look me in the eye. And-" he stopped suddenly, just squeezing her hand.

Paige squeezed back, extra hard so he could really feel it right in the bones that weren't quite bones anymore. "Never say never, heart," she murmured soothingly, brushing away his hair with a loving touch. "To anything. A little bit of hope will get you through almost anything."

Her words weren't patronizing or even simple lines that perhaps sounded right when there was nothing else to say. It was something she really believed, if not a little naively. Her lips stole a kiss next to his ear, secretive and hidden, as she spoke. "I'll always be here. You know that, right? And that you needn't be scared with me?"

She may have believed what she was saying, but having hope or trusting always seemed to take an extra trip around the world before reaching Jono, so his first response was always suspicion, or its brother sarcasm. "Hope," he said a bit laconically, "tell that to Gayle." He pulled away a bit, to look at her sadly.

"You can't promise me always. Just.. now is enough."

Paige nodded, threading her fingers with his. "You might be right. I can promise a lot of always's but that probably isn't one of them." Her smile had faded to something not quite a frown but certainly not anything all that joyful. All the mentions of Gayle lately made her throat tighten, especially the way he'd referred to her. /I would if I knew who exactly she was.../

"How long will now be enough?" she asked, looking up at him. /How long before you want her back?/

Jono stared at her like he was trying to solve some sort of a puzzle that was behind her eyes. "Just now. This moment," he tilted his head. "It's she who doesn't want /me/ back."

He raised a hand to rub at his forehead, the little crease that had appeared between his eyebrows. "And, I did miss her, at first, but," his eyes seemed unfocused. "But I ruined her life. I suppose she hates me even more than my parents do."

Paige winced and looked away, trying to hide the pain that flared up behind her eyes with the curtain that was her hair. Suddenly, staring at the television seemed very appealing. The infomercial on the television had run out long ago, leaving only grey static. Often Paige found herself staring at just the same thing at the mansion back home when she was supposed to be upstairs sleeping. It was very seldom that Jono showed up to force her upstairs to bed, although, moreso these days. He didn't need this right now; there was no time for petty jealousy.

"No one hates you, Jono. They might not understand right now, but they will in time. And if they don't, well. They weren't worth your time in the first place, now were they?"

"It doesn't matter," he said, hating to see Paige turn away from him. "I can't go back, and I don't even want to. I know where I belong now."

He reached out and took hold of her chin, turning her back to face him. He could feel her troubled thoughts bubbling in her mind, but couldn't separate them. "Paige," he murmured. "You've nothing to be jealous of."

Paige raised her eyes to meet his, embarassed by her actions. She was supposed to be helping convince him, not the other way around. "Of course," she answered, almost matter of factly. "You've always belonged with Xavier's, Jonothan. Sad how it took all this to make you realize it."

She tried to smile for him, brushing aside worrying thoughts of a girl she'd never met. His eyes had turned shades of amber and gold that reminded her, oddly enough, of home and a rock outcropping where she used to sit after her evening chores. And he thought he wasn't beautiful.

"I never wanted to be a mutant like you," Jono shrugged a little, wincing at the white noise that buzzed from the telly. He bent down to pick up the remote and turned the thing off, and suddenly all the light in the room was coming from him. Nightlight, he thought with some amusement, remembering how Sarah used to call him that. "And the things they've tried to teach us, mutant acceptance and cooperation and all that, I'm not sure I believe in it. Why should I? I've got no reason to expect people to react to me kindly."

"Except a whole bunch of people who do," she replied, blinking in the different light. It suddenly felt warmer, but she kept her arms around herself. "I suppose I didn't want to be a mutant for entirely good reasons. At least in the beginning. Does that make us even?"

Jono stretched a tentative arm around her shoulders, leaning against her side, wet clothes or no. He kept any and all glowy bits carefully from touching Paige, which made the whole thing a little bit awkward. "Yeah," he admitted. "I haven't figured that part out yet. Must be some mutant solidarity thing. The same way that humans band against us," bitterness rose in him again, and he struggled to stave it off. He was so tired of being bitter, or angry, or scared. "What no-good reasons did you have then?" he continued.

Paige bit back a yawn, resting her head against his. While he was so weary of her, of hurting her, there was a blind trust she had in him that was almost reassuring. Her fingers wove with his, running her thumb along the top of his hand as she plainly avoided his harsh observations. "Well, I was a little girl. A little girl who was incredibly jealous of her older brother and angry with her parents, one of them dead and I guess..." She trailed off, trying to collect her thoughts. "I guess I just wanted someone to know who I was. Silly huh?"

"You know," Jono remarked slowly. "I'm glad you're a mutant. I'd've never met you otherwise." He nuzzled Paige's hair thoughtfully, wondering if he'd just somehow said that he was glad he was a mutant too. "No, it's not so silly," he assured her. "Suppose that's one way to get attention too."

Paige laughed gently, turning her head to nose into his shoulder. "I'm glad I'm a mutant too, heart. You and saving the world, how can one go wrong? I might even get to wear a leather suit at some point if I'm supergood," she said into his skin, muffling her words.

"You just had to mention the leather suit," Jono twisted a strand of her hair around his finger. "I'll never get to sleep tonight after that." He pushed gently on Paige's shoulder, urging her to lie down on the bed.

"Good thing you don't have to sleep, hm?" Raising her head to meet Jono's gaze she slowly let him push her back, shoulders meeting the pristine white sheets that screamed of their current whereabouts. "Definately a perk."

"Yeah, sunshine, but you do," Jono cupped her cheek in his hand, looking down at her. "Do you mind if I stay here?" He had propped himself up on one elbow, lying on his side just far enough to keep Paige from energyradiating from his chest.

Paige smiled up at him in return, her eyes falling to half closed, lashes making gentle shadows. "Was just about to ask you if you would," she answered in a hushed tone before swiping her tongue over her lips. "And... I don't need /much/ sleep. It's almost the same."

Jono lay one hand on her stomach. "Then stay awake with me," he implored, staring down at her like she could save him from his life.