Kyle & Clint | Saturday Afternoon (backdated)

[x-hawkeye.livejournal.com]

Clint stops by Kyle's office to discuss Le Mis and the conversation wanders a bit.

Clint had his copy of Les Mis in hand as he made his way to Mr. G's office. He wasn't exactly frustrated, he just... wasn't entirely sure what to make of the book. He'd been serious in the email he'd sent his teacher about finding as many versions of the movie as possible just to make sure his grade didn't tank. Knocking on the door, he shifted from one foot to the other and tucked his binder under his arm.

"It's unlocked, Clint!" Kyle called - he'd have gotten up, but writing up an alternate mid-term for Tandy had taken up space - he had a laptop, a few print-outs and a set of Cliffs Notes for some of the readings from the previous semester out. As the door opened he, shrugged, and tried to rearrange the things he'd propped up to lean against the leg he'd kicked up onto his desk. "I should leave that thing open, you know? I mean, open-door policy, you'd think I'd remember to open my damn door."

Opening the door, Clint stuck his head inside and smiled a little. "I dunno, there's something kind of funny about a teacher saying 'open my damn door' the same way old dudes say 'stay off my lawn.'" He stepped the rest of the way into the room, leaving the door open behind himself, and sat down across from Kyle. "So. Seriously. Buzzcut Catwoman. France sucks. Prostitution is a bad idea."

"Yeah, I gave up on not swearing around you guys. I figure the most I can manage is not dropping the big four and apologizing when one of you goes all "Mister G, you can't say ass in the classroom!" Kyle explained. "So, you're like three weeks early first of all, maybe four if I push things out, so we're gonna talk about this in class, but yeah, that's the point. France sucked, and no one in those books was really making great decisions."

"It's really depressing," Clint commented, thumping his copy of the book down on top of his binder. "Destitution, death, despair..." He waved his hand around a little. "Why can't any of our English books be like. Positive?"

"The entire end is pretty undepressing but that's French lit for that time period." Kyle said. "So what you're saying here is I should skip straight over half my lesson plans and jump straight into Taming of the Shrew?" He was definitely glad he hadn't gone with Macbeth or Hamlet for the tenth graders this year.

"Andre took me to see a version of Taming of the Shrew put on by a really small group of theater people - this really skinny guy with a blond wig on wore six inch heels and fishnets, but I can't remember which part he was playing. Apparently none of his clothes matched." Clint said. "So I definitely have better associations than with Les Mis."

Kyle grinned. "I'm kinda expecting you guys to throw down when we get to the Shakespeare Unit this semester. There's some interesting theories about that play and I've got money on how each of you is going to interpret it." He was personally of the 'farce and satire' school, but that was a fairly modern interpretation. "And he was probably playing the pageboy in the Induction, if he was in drag."

"I just know his wig was like two feet tall and curly. Like Dolly Parton on steroids," Clint said. "Wait - there's a unit? We don't have to do a tragedy, do we? Romeo and Juliet was awful - though I did like Mercutio."

"Uh, no, we're gonna skip the 'everyone dies a lot' plays this year." Kyle said. "Macbeth next year, it's tragic but not in the same way that Hamlet or Romeo and Juliet is." He explained. "It's just 'the Shakespeare Unit" because I broke the year into blocks - Zombie Unit, Shakeapeare Unit, gotta make you read a big important american document Unit, French Lit is Depressing Unit."

"French Lit really is depressing," Clint said, nodding slowly. "This is why I'm taking Russian."

"Dude, go look up Anna Karenina, and come back to me with that." Kyle answered, nudging his laptop in Clint's direction. "The Russians invented depressing."

"Aw, don't ruin Russian for me, Mr. G," Clint said, grinning even as he reached for the laptop.

"Dude, half their country is frozen, and their national myth is a witch with a hut with chicken legs and they eat cabbage soup and like it. I think you're kinda stuck with it being ruined ahead of time." Kyle said, laughing. "but man, they do have some great swearwords, and fuzzy hats. And epic beards, at least on the wikipedia page for Russian Literature."

"I think the fuzzy hats and the epic beards make up for the cabbage soup," Clint said, tilting his head to the side. "And the Kozachok dance makes up for the whole frozen wasteland thing. I am totally going to learn how to do that dance, if only because then I could wear a fuzzy hat next year for Halloween."

"I'm pretty sure Kurt knows it, but if you ask, he'll try to talk you into dance class." Kyle said, grinning. "They did it on So You Think You Can Dance one season and I know I am totally doomed now for telling you I watch that show but I dated a dude obsessed with it. He wanted his own troupe."

"You're not doomed," Clint said, laughing. "Dude, my foster fathers made me watch Dancing With the Stars. Also, that fashion show with the guy who went, 'Make it work.' I can't remember his name, though. I don't actually have room in my schedule for dance, otherwise I might be tempted. I've never tried anything like that before, just regular PE. I was always really good at the climbing stuff. Mostly trees."

"Nope, doomed." Kyle nodded. "And honestly? It's kinda an awesome class when they teach the fast stuff. I'm telling you though, one semester you'll just find it on your schedule, and then I'll get dragged in to help like, be an extra dude since there's never enough guys." He was laughing though, and shaking his head, clearly amused. "It might be good for the.. you know, agility stuff. Also girls like it."

"Ha, girls," Clint said, cheeks turning just a little red. "I dunno about all that." Tandy mostly seemed to really like movies and popcorn - and Clint was totally fine with that. 100% good with it, since that kind of lined up with his personal interests nicely. And his budget, such as it was. "But I guess if it randomly shows up, I won't mind. It'll be a nice break from all the angry French people and their bread stealing prostitution."

"You don't get to get out of English if Kurt somehow mysteriously.." Kyle made air quotes with his fingers. "finds out that you want to learn Russian dances. And the angry French people are kinda important. But you guys get World War Z next, and you'll dig that, I promise. It's all zombies and war anthology."

"Hey - that's the one I heard was based off of an actual aural history of World War II, right? I'm not all into history so much, but the zombies kind of make it more interesting. Andre got me to read Pride and Prejudice because there were zombies in it in a newer rewrite or something. They were all, 'Oh, a ball, look at the lovely dancing. Oh no, there are zombies in the kitchen, let me pull my katana from my skirts so that I might deal swift death to these horrible creatures...'" Clint did the whole bit in a reedy, horribly falsetto British accent. "Seriously, though - those girls could take care of some zombies."

"If Hope asks me one more time about Jane Austin, I'm busting Pride and Prejudice and Zombies out." Kyle said, with a firm nod "And then we'll hit all the major rewrites. Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters, Abraham Lincolm Vampire Hunter, Macbeth and Mutants, we'll just do the whole lot."

"The sea monsters one always kinda wigged me out because hi - built-in tentacle porn and y'know, I'm open minded, but I don't wanna know what was going on back in the day beneath the lady's skirts and stuff. Straight up zombies are better. Plus, dude - seriously. The look on Hope's face if you gave her Pride and Prejudice and Zombies would be great. She could like. Compare and contrast between that and the original. Cause she's probably read the original like six times. Her mom wants her to be a Stepford Wife or something, it's kind of creepy." Clint closed his mouth and blinked, then shrugged. It wasn't like anything he'd said was untrue.

"The original's not godawful but it's a product of when it was written, and you can't really take it out of that and hold it up as some kind of ideal to live your life by." Kyle said. "But we'll cover that in class, how culture affects the written word and all that. Taming of the Shrew, like I said, might touch on Merchant of Venice if I feel like making you guys cry about how much Shakespeare I'm making you read...." He grinned, showing all his teeth, in a 'I am just so damn proud of myself" sort of way.

"I've seen Merchant of Venice," Clint said, smiling. "Shakespeare always kind of... takes extra brainpower or something because it's weird, but Andre likes him and helps to translate. Are there like. Modern translations? Like, into modern slang? That'd be kind of interesting. Like, 'Hey, no seriously, Romeo. That chick Juliet's bad news. So many different shades of bad news. You should totes not shag her, def don't marry her - oh crap, you're not listening.' Or something."

"It's why it's the only time I'll make you guys read out loud in class - it's easier if you're hearing it, and the context is there. I mean, the whole Romeo Romeo wherefore art thou?" thing makes way more sense if you've got all the stuff before and after it, where Juliet's like "Jesus can you just not -be- from your family, okay?" Kyle explained. "And yeah, there's a ton of modern variations. We'll probably watch at least one. Maybe two if I can swing it and can avoid the curse."

"The curse?" Clint asked, tilting his head to the side a bit. "I think watching the plays is really good. Like, seeing the actions and stuff. It makes the language easier to understand."

"Field trip curse. Pretty sure any time we put you kids on a bus and send you somewhere as a class, the universe like, decides it's time to send monsters after you." Kyle explained. "I'm willing to risk it for at least one of you being like "Okay, maybe this Shakespeare thing isn't so bad."

Clint looked at Kyle askance. "I totally just told you I liked Shakespeare. Can we like. Skip the curse thing?"

"Okay, one of you who isn't already a nerd." Kyle retorted. "And god yes, hopefully we can, because I don't need to be kidnapped anymore. I gave someone else that trophy!"