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If anyone brought it up later, Amanda would vehemently deny she had taken the stairs two at a time in her excitement of being back. Reaching the second floor, she paused only to catch her breath (and decide that maybe she should cut back on the fags, since that took longer than it should) decide which of her friends she wanted to see first, and knock on the appropriate door.

Angelo glanced up on hearing the knock at the door, and went to open it, first pausing to ask, "Who is it?"

"Ministry of Magic," came the reply - in some cases, Amanda decided, even a Harry Potter joke was acceptable. "I have reason t' believe you've been consorting with witches."

Angelo grinned and opened the door. "When did you get back?" he asked.

"Just now. Missed the plane, had t' wait for another." Amanda hesitated a moment, unsure of what his reaction would be, and decided, fuck it, and hugged him anyway. "Happy t' see me?"

Angelo blinked, then hugged her back tentatively. "'Course. You're lookin' well."

"Feelin' well, too. 'S not bad - I could get used t' it." She pulled back, looking Angelo up an' down. "You, on the other hand..." Tilting her head, she frowned. "Somethin's wrong."

Angelo blinked, then smiled. "Nothin's wrong. Well, no more than usual", he said lightly.

Before the events of the last month, Amanda would have said 'bollocks it is', and kept at him until he admitted it. Things had changed between them, though, and she didn't want to push things - the memory of how much she'd hurt him was too fresh. But she knew something was wrong - she could see it in more than the expression on his face. A lot of what Romany had taught her was still new and she wasn't that good at it, but Angelo's energy was all wrong. Conflicted. "Ange..." she began, unsure.

Angelo looked down at her, still keeping up the act. "Yeah?"

"I thought I saw... Forget it. Probably jet lag or somethin'." The last thing she wanted was to make him feel like she was hassling him, and there were other things she could do. Like talk to someone else. Maybe Marie. If something had happened, she'd know. "You wanna go downstairs for a fag or somethin'? Those non-smokin' flights are a bastard."

Angelo nodded. "Never turn down a smoke", he said easily, turning to follow her down the stairs.

"Thought you wouldn't," she replied, grinning. "How's Paige doin'? She wasn't there when I dropped me stuff off."

Angelo's face clouded, just for an instant. "She's doin' okay, I think. The time away helped some."

'So much for small talk,' Amanda thought, thinking desperately for something that wasn't an emotional minefield. Which wasn't something she was good at - normally she went the other way and looked for weak points to exploit, not to avoid. And she was rapidly running out of ideas. "Yer not gunna make me ask 'bout them Mets or somethin' are you? 'Cause I know sod all about sport," she said, deciding on humour as the best solution. Laughing was good.

Angelo chuckled. "No, I wouldn't put you through that. Tell me 'bout your trainin'", he suggested.

Amanda's face came alive. "It was good," she said. "More 'n good. Don't tell the teacher types, but I loved it. The studyin', I mean. Made me realise there's a lot I don't know 'bout magic, an' a lot more can be done with it. Rom says she's lined up a tutor for me, some egghead at one of the unis in New York. I'm hopin' he ain't some stuffed shirt type."

Angelo grinned as they walked down the stairs. "Can you imagine Romany choosin' a stuffed-shirt tutor for you?"

"Nah." Amanda chuckled. "'Cept if she thought it would do me good. But it looks like me free time is gunna be tied up for a good while."

Angelo nodded. "Well, at least it's somethin' you'll enjoy doin', right?"

"Right." Amanda thought for a moment, then said. "Some of the stuff Rom taught me... I ain't that good at it yet, but with enough practice she think I'll be able t' see auras like she does."

Angelo glanced over at her, surprised and a little alarmed by that information, but hiding it. "...Romany can read auras?"

Amanda nodded. "Yeah. 'S part of why she's so good with people. She said somethin' 'bout Paige's energy bein' all over the place when you three came t' get me that time."

Angelo nodded. "Makes sense."

"'M not that good, like I said... but every so often I can see things. Not much more 'n someone's not doin' so good." Amanda paused, hand on the back doorknob. "I don't expect you t' tell me, but so long as yer talkin' t' someone, I'll feel better."

Angelo glanced at her, then sighed. "Not here. C'mon outside, an' we'll see."

She nodded and opened the back door. It was cold, but definitely milder than it had been. "My shout," she said, pulling her cigarettes out of her jacket pocket and offering it to him.

Angelo took a cigarette from the pack with a nod. "Thanks. I'll pay you back later."

"Made sure I brought a supply of decent stuff from home," she said with a grin, digging around in her other pocket for her lighter. "I'd use the fire spell, only Rom says that ain't exactly what it was intended for, an' the less magic I actively use the better," she explained, lighting up and passing the lighter to him. "Bit of a balancin' act - can't use too much, but if I don't do enough, me mutation starts fuckin' with me again."

Angelo lit his cigarette and handed the lighter back quickly. "Sounds awkward."

She shrugged, inhaling smoke with visible relief. "No more 'n anyone else here. Everyone's got somethin' that makes things harder." She leaned on her elbows against the railing, looking over the muddy back yard. "But I figure we're in the best place. Lots of people here t' help."

Angelo nodded. "Yeah. An' they're good about comin' to find you when you don't go t'them."

Amanda laughed out loud at that. "Yeah, they are. An' don't I know it." She looked across at him. "So long as someone's doin' that for you, I don't have t' know what it's 'bout," she added, her tone serious. "Just don't think you have t' do it alone - remember what you told me 'bout lettin' people help."

He shrugged. "See, the thing is, I do kind of have to do it alone - at least until I can talk the person whose problem it really is into tellin' people."

She nodded, worry still in her eyes. There was more here than the thing with Manuel, but she couldn't push it. The thought of Manuel made her more uncomfortable - she wasn't sure how he'd react to seeing her again - and she shoved it away. "I got the same thing, with someone else," she said. "An' I can't say anythin' til they want me to. I think they should, but I can't make 'em. 'Specially after some of the stuff that happened. But you can't let it hurt you as well, no matter how good a friend you are. You can't help 'em if yer a mess too."

He nodded, knowing she was right. "It's kinda gettin' to me", he admitted quietly. "Far as I know, I'm the only person that knows, an' there's not a whole lot I can do..."

"Do what you can, but don't take on more 'n you can stand," she said quietly. "Yer not responsible for everythin' that goes wrong, Ange."

"Not everythin'", he acknowledged. "But a lot of the time, I should be able to fix things, or stop things goin' wrong, or, hell, even just not make them worse. Just doesn't seem t'work that way as much as I'd like..."

"Never does. But you shouldn't feel like yer the one at fault. This stuff with Manuel..." She hesitated over saying the name. "It ain't yer fault he's the way he is."

"Is it not?" Angelo asked bitterly, taking a drag on his cigarette. "Not sure everyone'd agree with you there."

"Then fuck 'em," Amanda said with feeling. "If they want t' blame someone, they can blame me."

Angelo sighed. "Shinobi said a couple of things, in an e-mail. He apologised later, but he wouldn't've said it if he didn't mean it at all."

"An' I said a couple of things t' you, out here, remember? An' I didn't mean 'em. People say stuff when they're stressed an' angry, an' it ain't always what they meant t' say. An' it ain't like he knew the whole story, any way." Amanda sighed. "Whatever he said, it ain't the truth."

Angelo shrugged. "You know I want t'believe it, but it's not that easy."

"It never is. That'd make life too bloody easy, wouldn't it?" Amanda said with a touch of frustration. "I can't believe the person who saved me life is that much of a bad person, Ange, an' I'm goin' t' go on thinkin' that, whether you believe it or not."

Angelo glanced at her, gratitude in his eyes. "Good. Maybe I'll manage t'convince myself, one of these days."

She smiled, ruefully. "Now don't that sound familiar. When did we switch places?"

He shrugged. "Think we might always've been in the same place. Just not so good at hidin' it, today."

"Maybe 'cause hidin' ain't workin' so much any more." Realising her cigarette was nearly burnt down the the filter, Amanda stubbed it out and dropped the butt in the sand-filled bucket left for that purpose. "The thing I found 'bout hidin' stuff, it always comes back t' bite you on the arse sooner or later."

Angelo chuckled wryly. "Don't I know it. Hard to break the habit, though."

"I'll try if you do," she said, grinning. "Deal?"

He nodded. "Deal."

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