Angel and Sooraya (Backdated)

[x-firestar.livejournal.com]

Angel finds Sooraya trying to find answers. And decides to give her a hand. Backdated to April 20.



With a deep sigh, Sooraya looked at the books next to her. She had read some pieces about a dozen times, but they weren't giving her anything now. So she let them be for now, wrapping her arms around her knees and staring in the far distance. The trees were finally turning green and nature seemed to blossom all around her, but Sooraya wasn't seeing it.

A 'click' broke the silence, followed by, "Sooraya, brooding is not a good look on you." Angel settled down next to her friend, curling her legs up under herself, setting the camera down on the ground between them. "What's up?"

"Hmmm?" Sooraya looked up quizzically. "Oh he Angel. I was just thinking... And looking for answers." Sooraya gestured to the books next to her. "But I cannot seem to find the answers everyone wishes to find me..." That she deep down, secretly inside, also wanted to find.

"What're you looking for?" Angel asked, reaching for one of the books. Not that she didn't already have a pretty good idea. "Some things can't be found in books, you know."

"Should I then just throw out everything?" Sooraya muttered softly. "Or just pick and choose? What does it mean if you can just do that?"

"I...don't know," Angel admitted, setting the book aside again. "I can't answer those questions for you, Sooraya, I'm not the kind of person who's going to sit here and tell you how to think. I don't think just throwing away everything you believe in is the way to go. That's too much of who you are just down the drain."

"I don't want to do that... But I also don't want to loose my big brother... It almost feels like I have to choose." Sooraya buried her face in her arms.

Angel scooted closer, wrapping an arm around Sooraya's shoulders. "Why?" She asked simply. "Why do you have to choose?"

"Because the one stops me from accepting the other. They can't be combined. They don't go together."

"And since when has that stopped you?" Angel rested her head on Sooraya's shoulder. "You know as well as anyone that sometimes you gotta get a little...creative."

Sooraya leaned her head against Angel's. "You mean like I have done in the past?" Sooraya's her own interpretations of the text in the Koran were not always the most mainstream ones.

"Exactly." Angel tried to infuse as much optimism as humanly possible into her tone. "We're not exactly livin' mainstream lives here, I don't think much of anything can be taken at face value."

"But even when I did that... there was some base to build things on, even if it was not 'mainstream' ... I don't have that here." Sooraya protested.

Angel pressed her lips together for a moment, thinking hard. "Okay. According to the Koran, what does a person need to do to not go to Hell?" she was wavering a bit, making this up as she went along. But she had to do something.

"If you believe in the six arkan al-iman, the pillars of faith and act according to the arkān ad-dīn and the various other rules in the Koran, you generally get quite far. The problem is that there are different interpretations of how some of the rules should work exactly in real life, so the opinions on what a person needs to do exactly vary." Sooraya explained, trying to find the right words to clarify things without turning it in a sermon.

"Different interpretations." Angel latched right on to that. "I know you said there's no base to build on here, but there are other things to consider, too."

Sooraya looked at her friend curiously. "What do you mean exactly?"

"Like the fact that Angelo is a good person," Angel replied simply. "One of the best. I know if a man lies with a man it's supposedly a sin, but...what about all the good things that man has done?" It wasn't nearly as simple as that and she knew it. But she had to try.

"I don't know... I really don't know." Sooraya shook her head. "I feel like it should make a difference and Angelo has done so many good things. But I don't know where the balance lies."

"And I think that's where creative interpretation comes in," Angel pointed out. "You have to figure it out. I mean, I can offer advice and you can keep looking through your books, but...it's up to you in the end."

"I know I will probably have to be creative with my interpretation..." Sooraya blinked as a sudden though occurred to her. "You know... what I really think I am looking for in these books is not an alternate interpretation... I think it's permission to find my own alternate interpretation... Like... if one has done it before on this area, I am able to do so as well?"

"Or does that sound very strange?"

"It doesn't sound strange at all," Angel assured her. "You know what I think your problem is? You're too bogged down by all these books. You need to stop reading so much, it's messing with your head."

"Where else am I going to find the answers I am looking for? I always could email one of the clergy online, but I think the reply I am gonna receive is just going to confirm what I found in those books." Sooraya gestured to the small pile besides her.

"No!" Angel said at once. "No emailing the clergy, no looking at books." She straightened up, setting a determined expression. "If you want answers look in here." She tapped Sooraya's temple with her index finger. "It's the best source of information you have."

Sooraya sighed. "Maybe I have been leaning on the books too much... But I haven't learned enough to just figure it all out on my own, Angel. Maybe I just need to look for books with other views... Even if they are far from mainstream..."

"Yes, you have." And with that the redhead jumped up, gathering the books in her arms. It was a little awkward - there were a lot of them -but she managed. "I'm confiscating these until further notice. No more books, Sooraya. The answer is in your heart, not printed on paper."

"You're... wait... what?" She blinked at her friend once, but then simply stared. "You are going to keep my books... well... basically keep them hostage?"

"Yup," Angel said proudly. "You can have them back when you figure this out on your own."

She stared a little longer at her friend, then lowered her eyes to her lap and shook her head. "Alright... you win, Angel... Besides, I was not going to find anything new in them." She left the thought she could more sources if she wanted to unspoken.

"And if I see you so much as skimming another book, I will not hesitate to bop you with it," Angel said in response to the unspoken thought. "And I'll be watching. Understood?"

Another sigh followed. "Yes ma'am." And she knew all too well Angel would not hesitate to take action as if she did spot her with a book.