xp_logs | Topaz and Frank || First Date (Backdated)

Topaz and Frank attempt to navigate their first date. It goes basically as one would expect - with some teasing and much mocking of humanity. Backdated to January 11th.

Okay. Okay. I can do this, thought Frank, standing outside Topaz' door. It's nothing. It's just a date. Dates are easy. He sighed, willed himself to relax. It's just a date. A nice, relaxed date.

Topaz was standing in the kitchenette, staring the cup of tea she'd made after Maddie had finished dressing her up like a Barbie doll. At least she'd respected most of Topaz's boundaries. The skirt was below her knee (barely), and the shirt wasn't too revealing. And the shoes were flats.

The nervous, twitchy feelings of the boy on the other side of the door reached her mind, and she turned quickly, pausing just before opening the door to compose herself. She could do this.

She opened the door, smiling. "Hi."

It was probably for the best that Frank was too shocked to say anything for a moment- the words "You look like a real girl!" had lined themselves up in his mouth before sanity stopped him.

"Hi," he replied eventually. "And... wow. Okay. You look... really, really great."

She resisted the urge to curl in on herself. She was unsure of all of this, of course. Always unsure. "Thanks." That was good, right? Not denying it. Not putting herself down. Good. "You do too. Who'd you have to borrow from?" Because he probably owned as many nice clothes as she did, and anyways this was easy talk for them. Natural.

"Clint," he replied, grinning. "And Billy. I'd have asked the new guy too, but I suspect he's as bad as we are at the whole... fashion... thing. So," he said, abruptly changing tack. "I've had this thought. There are two ways we could do this. Way one is we get really nervous and worked up about it, and freak out, and don't have fun. Way two is we chill the fuck out because it's us and it's not like anyone else is gonna care. I realize way one is traditional, but..." He smiled suddenly. "Well. Fuck tradition."

That earned him a laugh. "I like way two. Let's go with that." She didn't feel like spending all night worked up and anxious. This was completely new for her, and she wanted to just let go a little. Hell, maybe even have fun.

That was allowed, right?

"Cool." Frank grinned again. "And can I just add, I am really glad you said that, because I had no witty retort in place if you wanted to go with way one." He paused as memory struck. "Oh! And, um... this is for you." A present was suddenly shoved in Topaz's direction, clearly wrapped with more enthusiasm then skill. "...I would like to apologize for the wrapping. Or possibly to the wrapping, I'm not sure yet."

"'Who are you and what have you done with Topaz?'" The witch took a shot at a possible witty retort. She definitely wasn't the type of person to put herself in uncomfortable situations -- that should've screamed red flag, red flag.

She raised an eyebrow at the gift. Well, A for effort on the wrapping. She smiled, taking and unwrapping it -- and her eyes actually lit up. "Oh, brilliant!" It was The Snopes Trilogy by William Faulkner. Alice had had first edition copies of the books. Luca hadn't let her take them when they'd left the house. "Thank you!"

Ah. So this is why the present thing is mandatory, Frank thought. Because happy Topaz is adorable. And she can never know. "You're welcome. I was gonna go for flowers, but that seemed more appropriate." After a moment, he glanced at the door. "So. Ready to go?"

"Books are always more appropriate," Topaz agreed, still grinning. He was lucky she couldn't read his mind. "Ready. Yeah. What're we doin', anyways?"

"Bookstore, followed by a play. And probably food, because of that pesky biological imperative thing." He grinned, before offering a gallant arm.

"Food, of course. Kinda necessary." She stared at his arm for a moment, fighting down a smile. She hadn't realized people actually did that outside of those movies the others made her watch. Well alright. She finally let the smile go as she took his arm. "Let's go, then."

***

"Ten bucks says that hair is fake," Frank muttered, trying to conceal a grin as they watched a couple by the bar. "His and hers matching toupees."

"Some people just don't know how to get old with grace," Topaz said with a sigh, shaking her head before casting her gaze around. "Oh, that one's only here because he's hoping the girl he's with will have sex with him. Look at the program." The paper in his hands was crumpled up beyond all recognition. "He's bored outta his skull."

"Ooooh, good one." Frank smirked, eyeing the program. "Do you want to tell him she's gay or shall I? Because the way she's been looking at the lead, I think everyone else knows." He paused, glancing over at the bartender. "...Although someone should maybe also mention it to the bartender too. That... looks like a number on that serviette."

"Nah, it's no fun if we tell 'em now." Topaz pressed her lips thin as she watched. "Although how shameless do you have to be? She is here with somebody, even if he doesn't stand a chance in a cold hell either."

"Just can't get the staff these days, can you?" Frank replied conversationally, steepling his fingers in front of his face. "And she throws the drink in his face in three... two... one..." The drink and serviette arrived. Frank grabbed Topaz' hand in amused suspense.

Splash.

Topaz snorted as the bartender sputtered in disbelief, and she gave Frank's hand a light squeeze. "Oh no, wait, look, her date's goin' over to deal with it. This is gonna be fun..."

He squeezed back, still grinning, as the target of their mockery hesitated suddenly in front of the much bigger bartender. "Come on, little guy, you can do it. That's right. Puff up that tiny little chest. You are a real man, your mom said so."

"Did he just say 'my girl?' Really? Do people actually say that?" Topaz raised an eyebrow at that. "Oh is he just askin' for a slap - yeah, there it is!" She laughed as the woman turned around and smacked her date.

"Aaaand there's one for the bar tender! With her purse, too! Good use of resources there." The two watched in respectful silence as the woman marched out, head held high. Frank turned to his date. "Well, I'd give that a solid 8.5- not the best dramatic exit I've seen, but it's up there."

"Points for the purse though, that was smart. Wouldn't've gotten the bartender otherwise." He'd backed off after the drink incident. The two men were now standing in a stunned silence, trying to figure out where exactly they had gone wrong. "I think an 8.5 is fair though," Topaz agreed as she looked over at Frank. "But I think the actual show is startin' back up. Should we head in?"

"Yeah. Although... is he... yes! He is going back to watch the show he hates without even maybe getting laid! The power of theatre, dude," Frank said, grinning.

***

The rest of the play passed without any drama (quite disappointing after the intermission, actually), and then the teens were off to a nearby restaurant for dinner. It was a small place, cozy, and not so fancy that it made either of them uncomfortable.

Not that they needed much help in that department.

Once the food had been ordered and the menus had been taken, there was nothing left to distract them. Topaz watched the waiter go before looking back at Frank, managing a small, almost shy smile.

Frank smiled back, awkwardly, before studiously examining his napkin. "...So the second half sucked," he interjected. "Well, not sucked, but..."

"The first part was better," Topaz agreed. "Too predictable. It wasn't nearly as much fun."

"Yeah. They started taking themselves really seriously, didn't they? Like, 'Eugh, it's high art, we can't afford to have fun!'" He shrugged. "Kind of pretentious, you know? It's just a play."

There was a pause.

"...And... we've slipped into way one again, haven't we?"

Topaz pressed her lips thin. They weren't slipping into way one if she had anything to say about. The date had been fun up until then...

Oh.

Her eyes slid to the side, looking past Frank, and after a moment a small smirk pulled at her lips. "I think we're better off than the couple behind you. You haven't spilled a drink on me at least."

Frank smothered a laugh at that. "Oh God," he muttered. "Poor guy. How's she reacting?" There was the tinkling of cutlery behind him. "...Oh, powering through? Points for staying power."

"Points to both of them, I was expecting her to scream. She could've made a whole scene outta that. Kinda surprised she didn't actually." Topaz gave a slight nod of disapproval before moving on, settling on the table to their left. "They're both anxious." She was cheating the smallest bit now. But it was for a good cause. "They can't look at each other either. What do you think that's about?"

Frank smirked. It was lacking in subtlety, but he got the point. "Well, they're young, both well-dressed... don't look used to it, though. I'm guessing they're trying to impress each other. Maybe a first date?"

"Guess this is a popular place for this," Topaz said with a small laugh. Hey, anything to keep them from slipping back into way one. She didn't like way one. They were going to have fun tonight even if it killed them.

Of course in some strange twist of fate, it just might.

"Heck, can you blame them? I mean, quiet, private, people don't bother you unless you want to be bothered... it's cool. If I wanted to pick somewhere for a first date, purely hypothetically, of course, then I'd come here." He looked at her, and smiled. "One flaw in their plan, though. They are nowhere near as sarcastic as us. I mean, what can they talk about?"

"You know what, that's a good question. What do people talk about?" She cast an eye around the restaurant, easily zeroing in on the awkward couples who didn't know what to say. They were fairly obvious, after all. "They all look so uncomfortable..."

"Hmm..." Frank considered, eyeing up one couple in the far corner who seemed to be getting along fine. From what he could tell from the clothes- the truly horrifying, velour-dress-and-weird-pseudo-seventies-retro-suit-thing clothes- the conversation seemed to be about high fashion. "Well, dress sense is apparently a functional topic. Although I think maybe the absence of dress sense might be more accurate."

"I wonder if they're havin' a discussion about makin' better fashion choices," Topaz snorted. She wasn't going to pretend for a moment that her clothes weren't completely borrowed from Maddie, but even she had a better fashion sense than them. "Or not bein' pissed when they go shoppin.'"

"Or possibly how wonderful total self-deception is," Frank replied, smirking. "I mean, anyone who wears that outside is either lying to themselves or looking to scare little kids."

"Maybe they're confused. Thought it was Halloween or something. I can definitely see that bein' a good Halloween costume..."

"That is a possibility," Frank allowed. "Although I don't want to know who they're supposed to be. Saturday Night Fever's demonic slash blind cousin, maybe."

"Maybe they're goin' as the death of fashion?"

"Why just fashion? That right there? The death of western culture."

"I'll be sure to attend the funeral in somethin' that won't completely insult it."

"Why bother? They won't. I think as long as we stay out of feather boas we'll still be better dressed then them."

"Avoid feather boas." Topaz shuddered a bit. "I can definitely do that."

"I figured," Frank replied, smiling crookedly at her. There was a slightly more comfortable pause. "...Okay, I know we should move onto the next target of mockery, but I need to see the dessert menu first."

***

It certainly wasn't the total disaster it could have been, Topaz mused as they made their way back to the mansion. Actually, all things considered, she would have dared to say it went well.

Of course now came the fun part - negotiating the end of the date.

Frank slowed a little about halfway up the corridor, and considered his options. This was going to be awkward in the extreme if he got it wrong.

Okay. This is Topaz. Be... affectionate but non-intrusive. So don't let go of her hand unless she lets go first. And... maybe go easy with the kissing.

"This is our stop, huh?" he asked, as they came to her door.

"Looks like it." She stopped, rocking back on her heels a bit. Right to her door. Just like a perfect gentleman. She considered her options for a moment, sensing his hesitation and nerves, and finally, with a slightly wicked grin, she got up on her tiptoes and kissed him.

...Oooooor start with the kissing right now, that works too.

After a moment's appraisal of the current events, Frank wrapped an arm around Topaz's waist and kissed her back. This was certainly better then way 1.

Topaz was grinning - actually grinning - when she finally broke the kiss to meet Frank's gaze. "Still alright to do that?" Her eyes were shining with amusement.

"Oh yeah," Frank replied, smiling like an idiot. "I mean, it basically always is. In fact, assume you're okay to kiss me whenever you know what I think I'm just gonna kiss you again."

So he did. It seemed wiser then talking.

Her laughter at the babbling was stifled by the kiss. It was probably for the best.