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Reed and Hank have a manly chat about their relationships and sex lives... or lack thereof.

"I think I am failing miserably at attracting Sue," Reed announced randomly to Hank in their shared lab space. It was possibly the most personal statement Reed had every made, and it was done while in the midst of playing with a polymer substance he'd accidentally created. It was similar to his own structure (non-newtonian fluid) and for that matter alone, he was fascinated. "I've tried pick up lines, but I tend to forget the purpose behind them a few times. We've gone out to lunch, but I am certain I miss cues and say the wrong things." He sighed and pulled out a strand, frowning when it snapped back.

He didn't think it was supposed to be sentient.

"What do you do when dating?"

Hank looked up, blinking owlishly from behind his spectacles. "I, ah." The question presupposed he was dating, which was patently not the case. Whether he should reveal that to Reed at this juncture was another matter, however. Any conversation with the brilliant young man was a personal best; dare he torpedo its chances right at the start? "Well, I can't claim to have that much experience, so I'm hardly an authority on the matter..."

"One doesn't need experience to be an authority," Reed pointed out. "We are men of science. We thrive in hypotheses, and theories. In uncertainty and doubt. The very face of opposition." A pause. "Although, maybe there's a reason so many key scientists were practically celibate. Women are distracting." He returned to his bowl of goo before adding: "Men too. If that's one's proclivity."

"I, uh... suppose that's true, though I have also heard that a good balance between one's work and private life is the key to both personal happiness and maximum productiveness. After a given amount of toil productivity actually decreases, meaning that occasional distractions might be welcome or even necessary to continued success," Hank pointed out, emboldened by Reed's logical invitation to a hypothesis.

Interesting. "And do you feel this is something that is necessary in your life? Personally, I'm happiest when I've achieved maximum productivity," Reed responded, using Hank's own words. "How would a personal relationship supplement that? I recognize that I'm having a purely physical reaction that is perhaps bolstered by the emotional connection I feel with Sue; however, I highly doubt that being with her would cause me to suddenly increase in my scientific aptitude."

"No, but it might make you happy," Hank volunteered, "and that's beneficial too." At least, he thought it would be. Right? He supposed someone like Reed might not value happiness over pure productivity, but that didn't mean it was wrong to want it for himself. Was it? He shook his head, referring back to the previous question. "I don't know if it's necessary in my life, per se, but it's certainly something I've found myself wanting. Don't you?"

It was indicative of Reed's past history that it took him a while to answer that question. "Biologically, yes. There's always certain inclinations that one has, providing there isn't an asexuality component." A pause. "Upon further reflection, while I'm not a virgin, I can't think of a situation that wasn't a pragmatic response to a specific need. Long hours in labs and certain frustrations do reach a certain point. And there are always willing lab assistants." Whether this had to do with a reference letter or not, Reed had never considered that. "Happiness is an intangible concept, one that isn't measurable but obviously preferable to a state of depression or melancholy." He cleared his throat. "So I suppose what I'm trying to say is, I've never experienced both at the same time. I don't know what the results would be, but knowing that each individual vector is pleasurable, I can only imagine the combination of the two."

"Indeed. So pursuing the... combination is only logical, even if the outcome is uncertain," Hank reasoned. "And you've got someone in mind, which must mean that you're already some distance down the road anyway. Sue-" here his voice broke just a little bit and he flushed embarrassedly, though Reed didn't seem to notice, thank god, "-is a very nice person, from all my interactions with her. But you say you've had difficulty in convincing her to take you seriously as a potential partner?"

"To be honest, I haven't really proposed myself as such," Reed admitted. "Sue is a worldly person of extreme beauty and wealth. It's important to address this in a pragmatic, and yet reasonable way to ensure that she doesn't feel her physical assets are the key behind the attraction....although, it doesn't hinder it, mind you. It's just that her intelligence is well-matched, her philosophies are similar and she's managed to escape the capitalistic ideologies that so many influential, wealthy people have." With a nod, Reed finished his statement and turned his attention to Hank. "How about yourself? Here I am, pandering on about my inner workings, and yet I haven't asked you yours, when society tells me I should reciprocate when given advice."

"Me?" Hank blinked owlishly. "That's alright, there's really not much to tell. Or... anything at all, really. So I don't mind this being non-reciprocal. As it would be rather short, and futile."

Reed gave Hank a curious look. "Aren't you young? There's many young people your age here. Movies tell me hormones are rampant in these kinds of situations. Why don't you put yourself out there?"

"Well, because... I'm not quite sure how to do so," Hank admitted. On the one hand, it was embarrassing to say it out loud. On the other, if there was anyone who wouldn't judge him for it, it was Reed. "I didn't really have a typical adolescence, and my ability to 'put myself out there' is rather hindered by... well, several factors, social awkwardness and inexperience chief among them." He stopped, suddenly even more embarrassed, and refocussed his gaze on the microscope in front of him, suddenly very interested in making sure the eyepieces were properly aligned.

Reed, on the other hand, stopped fully what he was doing and sat up straighter, looking at Hank pensively. "You're a virgin."

Hank jumped as if he had been pinched. "I, er." What was he supposed to say to that? "Yes, I suppose I am."

"Although statistics show an average American does indulge in some sort of sexual activity between the ages of 15 and 19, not everyone does," Reed stated matter-of-factly. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. I only recently had the opportunity during my second phD experience. When one is as unique as we are, physiologically, intellectually, socially....it doesn't make things easy but hardly impossible." He remembered a conversation he'd had with Gabriel. Hank was young. Maybe it would work. "Have you heard of tindr? It's a fascinating cross-section of humans."

Reed Richards was recommending he get on Tindr. If he hadn't been so sure it would spur an intrusive question Hank would've pinched himself. "I, ah... I don't know if that would be the optimal solution to my, er, problem. I'd really rather let things develop organically, naturally..."

Reed nodded. "I personally don't understand how photographing one's genitals can be considered a mating ritual. In fact, most of these practices mystify me. Which," he added with a wry grin, "brings me back to the origin of this conversation. Would about on etiquette help? Research is comforting."

"Yes, it is," Hank agreed, happy to be back on solid ground once more. "More investigation is definitely warranted. Though for your particular inquiry... have you ever told Sue what you've told me? Your regard for her intelligence and personal philosophy, I mean."

"Of course," Reed said. "I make no mystery of it. I've also been researching various dating norms, with respects to high society, and naturally, the language of flowers.". He smiled. "I am going to arrange for a delivery of tulips‎. Yellow, naturally. That should clearly state my intentions."

"That seems a logical step." As if Reed would be taking any other kind. "I hope it goes well." For everybody's sake - his included.