xp_logs | Log: Clarice & Warren

Bad pickup lines, public lewdness, and shoes. A perfect Saturday for Clarice.

"So the guy says 'Your eyes are like limpid pools of primordial ooze, and I am the protozoa that wish to swim in their depths.'" Clarice rolled her eyes, popping another piece of sushi in her mouth. She was having more fun than she had expected with Warren in their spur of the moment need to Not Be At Xavier's. Sushi and shopping in the city was an excellent way to spend the afternoon. "He clearly was some sort of bio major. It was all I could do not to teleport him to Australia or somewhere."

How they got on the topic of terrible pickup lines she had no idea, but it was making her laugh hysterically recalling all the awful dates and whatnot she had been on in college. Sadly, thanks to her need (and hatred) for an image inducer, her dating and sex life had all but dried up. Fuck Xorn.

Warren snorted. "I really shouldn't laugh, but that's bad. And here I thought I'd reached new levels of low when I gave someone my number on the back of a bank receipt." He picked up his tea cup and chuckled. "I gave even less fucks in college than I do now. Even though everyone knew who I was, I still felt the need the impress them with the gobs of money I had in my account."

He paused before giving a bashful grin. "Although let's be real, if the opportunity came up, I'd probably still do it. I keep bank receipts in my wallet for this express reason."

Clarice rolled her eyes, "You do realize you only attract one type of person when you do that, right?" If he was okay with it, then it was his business, but if he wanted something different, he wasn't really going about it the best way. "But, in general, you are whole levels of ridiculous anyways. Have you met yourself?"

"I would hate myself if I met me," Warren answered bluntly. "I'm a complete ass with little to no empathy for the masses. I'm also completely loaded, handsome beyond compare with the world's greatest dick, and know how to use it well.". He grinned. "That's why I can say 'nice shoes, wanna fuck?' and get results. You'd sleep with me. Don't deny it."

Why would she deny it? "Of course I would," she stuck her foot out from under the table, "and I do have nice shoes. It's good of you to notice," she smirked, then took another bite of sushi, "but then, I never claimed I made good decisions in bed. Or out of bed either, since really, limited yourself to one place is kinda....limiting."

"Absolutely," Warren said, caught off guard by her honesty. "So why haven't we slept together yet? I have no doubt we'd be sexually compatible."

She almost said why, but shit, damn knitted reality. Because they went on a non-date when she was about 16 or so and he was her teacher, for sushi no less, while he dated another man. Except, not this Warren. Instead, Clarice raised an eyebrow over the lip of her hot tea mug, "Because you have failed to recognize my awesome before now. And because I need new shoes." Clarice had learned a long time ago, shame was for other people.

He raised an eyebrow slowly, a grin growing on his face. Putting his napkin done, he tapped the edges of his chair. "How do you feel about mid afternoon delights, followed by an expensive shopping spree? New shoes sound like an excellent idea."

Reaching down for her purse, Clarice gave a short nod, "I do like skyrockets in flight so long as they aren't crashing," she agreed. "And shoes. Girl's gotta have priorities after all," she headed back to the blessedly unisex single-stall bathrooms at the back of the restaurant. Those were so convenient.

He'd have to be careful with this one, Warren thought to himself. He was 99.9 percent convinced she was for real, but he'd been wrong before. After a few moments, he shrugged. What was life if he didn't live it to the fullest? Bathroom sex it was.