xp_logs | Kurt and Amanda at the beach

The Sefton siblings take a moment away from the party to catch up

Kurt had retreated a little from the main drag at the beach, and had found some rocks with a comfortable place to sit and a good view of the sea, so he was watching the waves come in and out from there.

The smell of a cigarette reached him first, followed by the sound of flip flops. Then Amanda's voice reached him, sounding amused. "Looks like I'm not the only one looking for some quiet. Would it spoil the moment if I joined you? You look like the cover of a romance novel, perched up there."

"Do you think so?" He peered down at her, smiling slightly. "Of course it would not, come on up."

"Well, it's that or you're practicing your gargoyle impersonation," she teased, stubbing out her cigarette in the sand and putting the butt in her pocket before climbing carefully over the rocks until she reached him. In deference to the location, she was wearing shorts and a loose cotton shirt, as well as flip-flops, and she had her hair tied back in a ponytail. "It's not exactly Brighton, but it's not a bad place," she remarked, settling in beside him.

"A little warmer than Brighton, I think." He shoulder-checked her gently, in welcome. "At least on most days."

"True. But for us pale-skinned people, that's not always a good thing." She poked his arm. "Does the sun even get through the fur? And if you burn, do you turn purple?"

"I suppose it might, given long enough." He studied his arm. "In a way, as I remember from before I let it grow. A darker blue."

"Still better than turning bright red, peeling, and then going back to white again." She leaned back a little, closing her eyes as she tilted her face up to the sun. "But even sunburn's an improvement on spending the summer in dusty libraries and bookshops and the like."

"Have you been doing much of that lately?" he asked with a sidelong glance. *For research?"

"When do I do anything else?" she snorted. "With Topaz and Clea coming on board, I get more help, but they're still getting trained. Fieldcraft, hand-to-hand, firearms, all that stuff. At least it's been quiet as far as active missions go? We haven't been called out really since that Asgard business." She cocked an eyebrow at him. "Tho' I think it's the same for the leather brigade?"

“That is true”, he agreed. “There have been some missions, but very few major ones. How are Topaz and Clea coming along?”

"Not bad. Clea's taking to field work like a duck to water. I'm not sure if that should bother me or make me proud." She made a face. "Topaz is still pretty fresh, so it's more theory at the moment. Practice will come soon enough." She looked pensively over the water. "So much for warning my ducklings about not following in my footsteps. But it's what they wanted."

"At least there might still be some ways in which they will not", he offered as an effort at reassurance. "You have taught them enough for that."

"Well, yeah - I'd rather not have to deal with either of them messing with the Hellfire Club. Or at least the old Hellfire Club. Things seem to have gotten pretty tame over there these days." Amanda glanced over at Kurt. "How about you? Anything going on?"

"Tame? Emma would be horrified to hear you say it." He smiled and shrugged slightly. "Not very much, aside from the occasional mission."

"Well, tame compared to how it used to be, with the Black Court trying to co-opt the White every other week. Now they're cooperating." Amanda shrugged. "You said before the leathers are quiet. I meant you. How have you been?"

"Well enough, I suppose." It wasn't exactly true, but he didn't know how to put it into words. "All things considered."

"Such as?" she asked, nudging him a little. "Don't think I haven't noticed the hermit thing lately."

He tapped her hand lightly. "I know you have. But you and Topaz aside, there is little to come out for."

She frowned a little at that. "Doesn't sound exactly healthy, Blue. It's been tough for you, I know, but you can't stop having a life outside of us."

"Little in this country", he amended. "I still speak with Stefan or one of the clan every few days, and Father Michael when I am able to call at a time he is not sleeping."

The frown didn't lift. "It's good you're in touch, Blue, but... you've chosen to live here. Cutting yourself off... it's not living, not really. Having friends, making connections... it's what helps keep us grounded, no matter what else happens to us."

Kurt looked out at the sea. "Things have not been the same since - M-Day. People are different, and so many are gone. Many of my closest friends, and some family... Jimaine. Nick."

"Remy. Ororo. Moira." Amanda sighed. "You know, I went to the cemetery, not long after the whole thing happened, to see if Charlie's grave was still there? I guess I hoped that with all the people we lost, he might have been brought back. But no, it was still there, same as before." She frowned. "We lost a lot. But if we hadn't made that sacrifice, there'd be a lot more dead. The whole world, in fact. At least, that's what I remind myself. And since there is still a world, I think it's important to the memories of those we lost getting here that we go on living as best we can." She snorted. "Or something like that. I know, I sound like a bleeding Hallmark card."

"And yet not wrong." He squeezed her hand. "But it is not so easy for me. You, at least, had Topaz and Clea to continue teaching, to keep you looking forward. But to start again from - not nothing, as I said, I still have you and Topaz here in America, but I do not know where to begin. And sometimes, perhaps, it is better to be alone than take yet another risk."

"As the man says, you have to be in it to win it," Amanda replied. "If you don't risk, then yeah, you're safe. But you'll always be alone. I seem to remember you saying something similar to me at one point, when I was sure everyone would hate me forever after the Hellfire business."

"I think the context was slightly different, but point taken." He sighed. "It is not that I think people will hate me, but my record speaks for itself in terms of love. Perhaps I have just been foolish to think it could be otherwise."

That earned him a poke in the ribs. "One, you have taste almost as bad as mine. Two, there's more to the world than love. Or sex, for that matter. And no, I'm not just saying that because I haven't actually dated anyone for... fuck, I have no idea. Years, probably. Any way. If you spend your life hiding from the world because you're love's bitch, then you're definitely not going to have any chances to change that. And that seems foolish to me."

"Perhaps." Kurt offered her a slight smile. "But you did not come up here to listen to me feeling sorry for myself."

She waved the last comment away. "As if you haven't done it for me a dozen times over, Blue. But we are on holiday, so I suppose we should ration the serious talk before someone catches us and we end up being tossed in the water for our own good. Still, the ocean's a lot better than the mansion lake. Not as cold, for a start."

"Do people still do that?" he asked, amused. "If not, that is a shame. It was a good tradition."

"Only if you were the thrower. Being the throw-ee sucked."