Artie & Darcy | Anger Management
Feb. 14th, 2022 03:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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xp_logs(backdated) After the X-Force meeting, Darcy decides she's overdue to get some pent up aggression out and drags Artie along for the ride. The talk during the commute back to Xavier's takes most of the edge off.
Darcy sent a few texts as the meeting wrapped and she made her way back to her desk, the last one all but demanding Artie meet her at her desk with anything he didn't want to be parted with for the day.
Artie had been startled by the increasingly firm texts but went with it, doing as asked, fully expecting a fight when he got to the desk.
"We're leaving," she said quietly once he appeared, pulling her bag over her shoulder and wrapping her hand firmly around his elbow in a move reminiscent of Germany as they made their way downstairs and out of the brownstone. She didn't bother talking as her heels clicked along the sidewalk, guiding him through the streets to the garage she'd parked in that morning. Once they got there she dropped his elbow long enough to hand over her keys. "You're driving. Hit the gun range at Xavier's, then fighting? I'd say sparring, but.." she took in Artie's body language and evaluated her own mental state, then concluded "well, we both know that would be a lie. It's gonna be dirty and mean because I think we've both let shit get too pent up, but I've got a great first aid kit for after. And food."
He appreciated the minor kindness of letting him drive. Much as he hated city traffic, sitting as passenger meant using a synthesiser to talk without distracting the driver while a lifetime of practice had left him able to use projections - simple ones, such as text, without looking. He started the car, pulling out of the parking range and replied, in text, "so you've got plans."
"I have too much pent up.. anger, upset, aggression.. whatever you want to call it for my usual methods of getting it out. Not at you, mind, not really, although I wasn't fond of the flatscan slur before and I'm even less now that I'm still not but functionally I am? Minor annoyance, I would've signed something pissy at you and been over it any other day." Darcy made a shrugging motion with her hands, holding them so Artie could get a glimpse from the corner of his eye as he drove. "Just a loose idea. Range is.. some people it works, other people know they don't need a gun in their hands when they're high emotion. I'm open to suggestions, but I wouldn't ask you to wear your synth for like, yelling to release some of it. I know you don't like it. Physical release is good but I don't want us to end up in medical, so gotta take the edge off first somehow."
"You can use English," Artie offered, changing lanes around a truck that had abruptly stopped in traffic to - oh fuck knew why. "Easier to follow." He focused on the road for a moment, emotions still a mess. "Skip the range. Guns are a tool, not something you make a habit of going to angry." Another moment. "Can we come back to the flatscan thing. Why are you upset?"
"I don't alter my range time for my mood generally because you never know what you might be feeling if you need to use it for real. No problem skipping it though, I don't usually go on Mondays." Her fingers drummed an anxious rhythm on the center console as she gathered her thoughts. "I don't like slurs based on things people can't change about themselves. We don't choose our genetics. It's shitty enough when it's done to our own people." Darcy sighed. "Family history, too. I'm ethnically Jewish and the Holocaust was not so long ago, really. My Gran's parents sent her to America with a Gentile couple they were friends with to act as nanny for their young child, and her two youngest siblings were sent on Kindertransport. We lose track of them there. Probably adopted, possibly still alive, even. The rest of the immediate family, older brother and parents and grandparents, however..." she trailed off, knowing he could fill in the outcome. "So. I'm a passer because I got lucky with my mutation type and I'm not a flatscan but functionally I might as well be. Toss in one of the many slurs for a Jew or a remark asking where my yellow star is, then make a few casual comments reducing my worth to how well I can breed or pleasure a man and you'd get a solid win in bigot bingo."
She was quiet for a few minutes as Artie deftly navigated another snarl of traffic. "I wouldn't want to be your friend if I actually thought you were that sort of person," she continued gently, "and I do understand a bit why you'd hate those who try to subjugate our people. Or who pass, especially if they're the really shitty type that work against mutant self-interests. I can empathise, even. You're right to be concerned. There's one person in SWORD that I trust, and it's Jane. Despite that, I've been trying to steer Clint away from the idea of relying on her or involving Thor with the fucking portal, because if they get involved, the org gets involved, and fuck that. I don't want Brand or her people or worse, Sitwell and his shitty minions crawling all over the grounds, trying to control us in our own damn home. And they would, because that's what they fucking do. Lie, spy, control."
Artie stared down the road for a while. "I get why you don't like it," he offered, finally. "But you're ignoring the power imbalances. There's what? 250,000 mutants left in the world after M Day? And 95% of them, 99% have powers that are negligible. We used to think maybe one in a million might be an omega level mutant." He shifted his hands on the wheel, hardly looking at Darcy. "Our value to humans comes from whether we can be used, whether we can pass and when we're not able to do that, they find ways to destroy us." He gave a silent, bitter laugh. "I guess I'm more political than I used to think I was. If I'm calling them flatscans, it's because I want a word for them sometimes that isn't about putting us in opposition. If they're humans, we're not. That's the whole point of calling us mutants. We're not people, as far as most of them are concerned. And I want everyone around me to remember that. But most of you pass. Most of you got to grow up, thinking you were the same as them. I always knew how they treated us when they could get away with it."
"I appreciate that, and actually? I try not to ignore the power imbalance. Slurs just make me uncomfortable. You're right about how vulnerable the average remaining mutant is. Those of us with the powers and skills to really push are often too much at odds to coordinate efforts. And history tells us that the idea of Might making for caring, benevolent dictators doesn't hold up long-term. Working inside the system.." she trailed off with a bit of a laugh. "College Darcy really believed that we could work inside the system to affect change. I think that's still somewhat true at the local level. Cultivating sympathetic ears on the town board, in the wider county. Ideally, get some of our own people into those positions. We could do some good things for people in the immediate area, but we'd still get hamstrung by state and federal policies. And that doesn't even factor in having to overhaul cops and shit. I don't know what the answer is for any of that, even literally having a degree in the topic." Her lips curved in a small grin. "It's hard to not be political when the laws affect your ability to just go about life with some level of ease."
The trees were getting more frequent now that they were closer to Westchester than the city. "What I do know is that I'm willing to work with and around the system to try to change the every day things, and I'm willing to.. well. Sentinels? Other things that profess to be some sort of 'solution' to the 'mutant problem'? I'd walk that information to the Brotherhood myself, if I could be assured safe passage. There are things that need never see the light of day. I was willing to select one shitty politician for ritual sacrifice to save a city of people I didn't know and don't particularly care about. I lost some sleep over it, but I'd do so much more for any of you, or for the non-passing folks I've interacted with since we moved into the brownstone. I understand why they might find Magneto's message attractive, even if I doubt they're getting the full scope of things. Life experience has given them a different understanding of the world than I have."
Artie shook his head. "I don't know. I know I wouldn't be willing to be the good mutant on display in local government or running for school board, knowing everything I did had to be perfect to make sure that the humans have a good mutant interaction and then knowing that everything else I did could be overturned any moment by something else a scarier mutant does. Or a black mutant or..." He let the text trail off. "But also, I agree. Some things need tearing down. If you don't know about the terrorism, Magneto offers something -- " He broke off and hit the brakes hard to avoid the car in front which had in turn braked and turned without indicating. "There's a reason people support him. If he was less about the murder and more about the liberation, I'd probably support him." Artie thumped the steering wheel with one hand. "Of course, he's all about the murder." He didn't say anything else for a long while.
"Brand and Shield, though. Fuck." They pulled through the gates of the mansion and Artie paused for a moment, pulling over and letting the car idle in neutral before driving into the parking garage. "I don't trust them, I don't trust what they want and I don't believe we can use them safely without being used ourselves but what would I know? I'm not up on my politics or whatever the fuck it is like they are. I'm just some guy who maintains our contacts in the mutant underground and isn't out there all martyr like, like Angelo or whatever, trying to fucking save everyone."
"Yeah, my experiences with them started out pretty bad and haven't improved much over time. I mean, I'm willing to take the time digging through the information they're 'sharing' because if I have more parts of the picture I might be able to find things they weren't expecting, and I enjoy doing that. If it ends up being a legit share and favors settled, if they only want to work with us for shit that's too big for us to handle alone.. that's great, I can work with people I loathe for things like Baltimore or worse." Darcy pressed the button on her seatbelt, letting it slide back into the side of the car and turning in her seat to more fully face Artie. "But I can't forget that some of the shit this place has gone through in the past six months or so has been because of their intel. Because we trusted it, because some of our best professionals thought they had a respected enough give and take with those orgs for them to act with good faith. And how were they rewarded for that? With nothing good, that's how."
Artie nodded, turning to face her and switching to sign. "What about our networks when all our focus is on seeing if this is something real or a goddamn trap? As for what this place has been through, well, apparently, the ends justify the means and if you didn't think that, you shouldn't be working here." Here was a gesture southward in the general direction of Manhattan. Artie rubbed his eyes. "I'm still angry. I still want a better option and not just 'oh, we work" - he linked his hands - "like this with SHIELD and SWORD." He put the car back into gear and began to head toward the garage.
"Some of what Ange said during the meeting makes the strongly suspect the focus won't shake out that way, but I won't be surprised if I end up on a lot of the monitoring duty and pulling the rest of you in for your more specialized contacts as a second set of eyes. I know how to find the variables, I enjoy doing it, and my contacts aren't nearly as delicate or varied as what you've got going on with the Underground or the absolute madness that is the Hellfire Club. It's not like I don't already spend a lot of time with the data machine as-is. And I'm not inclined to give them an inch but I'm very motivated to keep the rest of you alive and safe, so you know I'll be cross and triple checking everything to try to get you the best intel possible." Darcy's hands moved as she talked, skipping fewer of the words than she'd needed to just a few weeks ago. "I'm not sure what a better option would look like, but I think... maybe if you and Kevin have a very blunt conversation, the two of you can figure out something better than 'we do this now'. He's been honest with me regardless of how up front I'm being with him, even as much as he likes to dazzle people with his bullshit. Sometimes we end up talking across each other, which is kinda what I think the two of you did earlier, but it's been worth it for me to keep pushing until we work it out. Maybe it will for you, too. If not... your concerns are valid and we will figure something out. I trust him and his instincts, but I also agree with your read on Shield in a way I don't think he sees because of his own agency past. Intel bias, right?" She gave him a weak grin as they parked. "You ready to change and meet up in the gym?"
Artie nodded soberly. "Yeah. They likely don't have the contacts in the Underground or any of that. Hell, maybe they do. I don't know." He let his head sag back against the back of the seat for a moment and sighed before signing, "What I really object to is being condescended to because I think it might be a poisoned chalice or the implications that I can't do my job when I dislike humans." He shrugged awkwardly in his seat and signed "Yeah, let's hit the gym. I'm not -- I calmed down over the drive back, which is nice, because I really don't ever want to be that guy who thinks shooting something or punching someone is a good way to work through my feelings", before taking the keys out of the ignition and getting out of the car.
Darcy followed him out of the car, hefting her bag back over her shoulder as they moved inside. "I don't think they were trying to condescend, but seriously. Talk to Kevin about it. He wouldn't have sent me to Germany with you if he didn't think you could do your job. He's been firm about not reinforcing any bad habits I already have." Her hand skimmed over the banister as they walked up the stairs, pausing on the landing to the second floor. "I'm glad talking calmed you down, took the edge off. I've still got a bit of built up energy I need to get out though, and a spar's as good as anything else for it. Meet you on the mats in fifteen?"
Darcy sent a few texts as the meeting wrapped and she made her way back to her desk, the last one all but demanding Artie meet her at her desk with anything he didn't want to be parted with for the day.
Artie had been startled by the increasingly firm texts but went with it, doing as asked, fully expecting a fight when he got to the desk.
"We're leaving," she said quietly once he appeared, pulling her bag over her shoulder and wrapping her hand firmly around his elbow in a move reminiscent of Germany as they made their way downstairs and out of the brownstone. She didn't bother talking as her heels clicked along the sidewalk, guiding him through the streets to the garage she'd parked in that morning. Once they got there she dropped his elbow long enough to hand over her keys. "You're driving. Hit the gun range at Xavier's, then fighting? I'd say sparring, but.." she took in Artie's body language and evaluated her own mental state, then concluded "well, we both know that would be a lie. It's gonna be dirty and mean because I think we've both let shit get too pent up, but I've got a great first aid kit for after. And food."
He appreciated the minor kindness of letting him drive. Much as he hated city traffic, sitting as passenger meant using a synthesiser to talk without distracting the driver while a lifetime of practice had left him able to use projections - simple ones, such as text, without looking. He started the car, pulling out of the parking range and replied, in text, "so you've got plans."
"I have too much pent up.. anger, upset, aggression.. whatever you want to call it for my usual methods of getting it out. Not at you, mind, not really, although I wasn't fond of the flatscan slur before and I'm even less now that I'm still not but functionally I am? Minor annoyance, I would've signed something pissy at you and been over it any other day." Darcy made a shrugging motion with her hands, holding them so Artie could get a glimpse from the corner of his eye as he drove. "Just a loose idea. Range is.. some people it works, other people know they don't need a gun in their hands when they're high emotion. I'm open to suggestions, but I wouldn't ask you to wear your synth for like, yelling to release some of it. I know you don't like it. Physical release is good but I don't want us to end up in medical, so gotta take the edge off first somehow."
"You can use English," Artie offered, changing lanes around a truck that had abruptly stopped in traffic to - oh fuck knew why. "Easier to follow." He focused on the road for a moment, emotions still a mess. "Skip the range. Guns are a tool, not something you make a habit of going to angry." Another moment. "Can we come back to the flatscan thing. Why are you upset?"
"I don't alter my range time for my mood generally because you never know what you might be feeling if you need to use it for real. No problem skipping it though, I don't usually go on Mondays." Her fingers drummed an anxious rhythm on the center console as she gathered her thoughts. "I don't like slurs based on things people can't change about themselves. We don't choose our genetics. It's shitty enough when it's done to our own people." Darcy sighed. "Family history, too. I'm ethnically Jewish and the Holocaust was not so long ago, really. My Gran's parents sent her to America with a Gentile couple they were friends with to act as nanny for their young child, and her two youngest siblings were sent on Kindertransport. We lose track of them there. Probably adopted, possibly still alive, even. The rest of the immediate family, older brother and parents and grandparents, however..." she trailed off, knowing he could fill in the outcome. "So. I'm a passer because I got lucky with my mutation type and I'm not a flatscan but functionally I might as well be. Toss in one of the many slurs for a Jew or a remark asking where my yellow star is, then make a few casual comments reducing my worth to how well I can breed or pleasure a man and you'd get a solid win in bigot bingo."
She was quiet for a few minutes as Artie deftly navigated another snarl of traffic. "I wouldn't want to be your friend if I actually thought you were that sort of person," she continued gently, "and I do understand a bit why you'd hate those who try to subjugate our people. Or who pass, especially if they're the really shitty type that work against mutant self-interests. I can empathise, even. You're right to be concerned. There's one person in SWORD that I trust, and it's Jane. Despite that, I've been trying to steer Clint away from the idea of relying on her or involving Thor with the fucking portal, because if they get involved, the org gets involved, and fuck that. I don't want Brand or her people or worse, Sitwell and his shitty minions crawling all over the grounds, trying to control us in our own damn home. And they would, because that's what they fucking do. Lie, spy, control."
Artie stared down the road for a while. "I get why you don't like it," he offered, finally. "But you're ignoring the power imbalances. There's what? 250,000 mutants left in the world after M Day? And 95% of them, 99% have powers that are negligible. We used to think maybe one in a million might be an omega level mutant." He shifted his hands on the wheel, hardly looking at Darcy. "Our value to humans comes from whether we can be used, whether we can pass and when we're not able to do that, they find ways to destroy us." He gave a silent, bitter laugh. "I guess I'm more political than I used to think I was. If I'm calling them flatscans, it's because I want a word for them sometimes that isn't about putting us in opposition. If they're humans, we're not. That's the whole point of calling us mutants. We're not people, as far as most of them are concerned. And I want everyone around me to remember that. But most of you pass. Most of you got to grow up, thinking you were the same as them. I always knew how they treated us when they could get away with it."
"I appreciate that, and actually? I try not to ignore the power imbalance. Slurs just make me uncomfortable. You're right about how vulnerable the average remaining mutant is. Those of us with the powers and skills to really push are often too much at odds to coordinate efforts. And history tells us that the idea of Might making for caring, benevolent dictators doesn't hold up long-term. Working inside the system.." she trailed off with a bit of a laugh. "College Darcy really believed that we could work inside the system to affect change. I think that's still somewhat true at the local level. Cultivating sympathetic ears on the town board, in the wider county. Ideally, get some of our own people into those positions. We could do some good things for people in the immediate area, but we'd still get hamstrung by state and federal policies. And that doesn't even factor in having to overhaul cops and shit. I don't know what the answer is for any of that, even literally having a degree in the topic." Her lips curved in a small grin. "It's hard to not be political when the laws affect your ability to just go about life with some level of ease."
The trees were getting more frequent now that they were closer to Westchester than the city. "What I do know is that I'm willing to work with and around the system to try to change the every day things, and I'm willing to.. well. Sentinels? Other things that profess to be some sort of 'solution' to the 'mutant problem'? I'd walk that information to the Brotherhood myself, if I could be assured safe passage. There are things that need never see the light of day. I was willing to select one shitty politician for ritual sacrifice to save a city of people I didn't know and don't particularly care about. I lost some sleep over it, but I'd do so much more for any of you, or for the non-passing folks I've interacted with since we moved into the brownstone. I understand why they might find Magneto's message attractive, even if I doubt they're getting the full scope of things. Life experience has given them a different understanding of the world than I have."
Artie shook his head. "I don't know. I know I wouldn't be willing to be the good mutant on display in local government or running for school board, knowing everything I did had to be perfect to make sure that the humans have a good mutant interaction and then knowing that everything else I did could be overturned any moment by something else a scarier mutant does. Or a black mutant or..." He let the text trail off. "But also, I agree. Some things need tearing down. If you don't know about the terrorism, Magneto offers something -- " He broke off and hit the brakes hard to avoid the car in front which had in turn braked and turned without indicating. "There's a reason people support him. If he was less about the murder and more about the liberation, I'd probably support him." Artie thumped the steering wheel with one hand. "Of course, he's all about the murder." He didn't say anything else for a long while.
"Brand and Shield, though. Fuck." They pulled through the gates of the mansion and Artie paused for a moment, pulling over and letting the car idle in neutral before driving into the parking garage. "I don't trust them, I don't trust what they want and I don't believe we can use them safely without being used ourselves but what would I know? I'm not up on my politics or whatever the fuck it is like they are. I'm just some guy who maintains our contacts in the mutant underground and isn't out there all martyr like, like Angelo or whatever, trying to fucking save everyone."
"Yeah, my experiences with them started out pretty bad and haven't improved much over time. I mean, I'm willing to take the time digging through the information they're 'sharing' because if I have more parts of the picture I might be able to find things they weren't expecting, and I enjoy doing that. If it ends up being a legit share and favors settled, if they only want to work with us for shit that's too big for us to handle alone.. that's great, I can work with people I loathe for things like Baltimore or worse." Darcy pressed the button on her seatbelt, letting it slide back into the side of the car and turning in her seat to more fully face Artie. "But I can't forget that some of the shit this place has gone through in the past six months or so has been because of their intel. Because we trusted it, because some of our best professionals thought they had a respected enough give and take with those orgs for them to act with good faith. And how were they rewarded for that? With nothing good, that's how."
Artie nodded, turning to face her and switching to sign. "What about our networks when all our focus is on seeing if this is something real or a goddamn trap? As for what this place has been through, well, apparently, the ends justify the means and if you didn't think that, you shouldn't be working here." Here was a gesture southward in the general direction of Manhattan. Artie rubbed his eyes. "I'm still angry. I still want a better option and not just 'oh, we work" - he linked his hands - "like this with SHIELD and SWORD." He put the car back into gear and began to head toward the garage.
"Some of what Ange said during the meeting makes the strongly suspect the focus won't shake out that way, but I won't be surprised if I end up on a lot of the monitoring duty and pulling the rest of you in for your more specialized contacts as a second set of eyes. I know how to find the variables, I enjoy doing it, and my contacts aren't nearly as delicate or varied as what you've got going on with the Underground or the absolute madness that is the Hellfire Club. It's not like I don't already spend a lot of time with the data machine as-is. And I'm not inclined to give them an inch but I'm very motivated to keep the rest of you alive and safe, so you know I'll be cross and triple checking everything to try to get you the best intel possible." Darcy's hands moved as she talked, skipping fewer of the words than she'd needed to just a few weeks ago. "I'm not sure what a better option would look like, but I think... maybe if you and Kevin have a very blunt conversation, the two of you can figure out something better than 'we do this now'. He's been honest with me regardless of how up front I'm being with him, even as much as he likes to dazzle people with his bullshit. Sometimes we end up talking across each other, which is kinda what I think the two of you did earlier, but it's been worth it for me to keep pushing until we work it out. Maybe it will for you, too. If not... your concerns are valid and we will figure something out. I trust him and his instincts, but I also agree with your read on Shield in a way I don't think he sees because of his own agency past. Intel bias, right?" She gave him a weak grin as they parked. "You ready to change and meet up in the gym?"
Artie nodded soberly. "Yeah. They likely don't have the contacts in the Underground or any of that. Hell, maybe they do. I don't know." He let his head sag back against the back of the seat for a moment and sighed before signing, "What I really object to is being condescended to because I think it might be a poisoned chalice or the implications that I can't do my job when I dislike humans." He shrugged awkwardly in his seat and signed "Yeah, let's hit the gym. I'm not -- I calmed down over the drive back, which is nice, because I really don't ever want to be that guy who thinks shooting something or punching someone is a good way to work through my feelings", before taking the keys out of the ignition and getting out of the car.
Darcy followed him out of the car, hefting her bag back over her shoulder as they moved inside. "I don't think they were trying to condescend, but seriously. Talk to Kevin about it. He wouldn't have sent me to Germany with you if he didn't think you could do your job. He's been firm about not reinforcing any bad habits I already have." Her hand skimmed over the banister as they walked up the stairs, pausing on the landing to the second floor. "I'm glad talking calmed you down, took the edge off. I've still got a bit of built up energy I need to get out though, and a spar's as good as anything else for it. Meet you on the mats in fifteen?"
