Amanda and Bethany

[x-shinobi.livejournal.com]

Sunday afternoon, Bethany makes her promised visit to the school to visit Amanda. Honesty abounds - about Manuel, and about them. Nobody, to Beth's surprise, takes a header into the lake for the experience.



Privacy and distance from the mansion, that was what was needed. Amanda had steered Bethany down towards the lake, knowing she wasn't ready for her 'study' in the library where several mystic objects were kept, and realising Beth could use the space as well. And the dock seemed right, somehow.

She'd been easy enough to guide, and really, Bethany couldn't deny that she was a little grateful to be moving in a very not-house-wards direction.. she was just being stubborn about keeping her hands crammed in her pockets and her eyes rooted to her feet. "I think this is the first time I've ever really seen the outside here," she said after a moment, chancing a brief glance up when the telltale smell of a lake became more noticable.

"Yeah, I do tend t' pounce on you an' drag you off t' the nearest room with a lock when you turn up, don't I?" Amanda replied wryly, but her grin faltered in the face of Bethany's obvious less-than-happiness. "The school gets a bit claustrophobic sometimes," she went on, trying hard for 'normal', at least until they were out of ear and psi-shot. "I like t' come down here an' catch me breath." She led the way onto the dock, boots echoing on the wooden slats. "'S usually fairly quiet."

"Quiet's good," Bethany agreed, mustering up a small smile as she followed her along, finally taking the opportunity to take a little bit of a look around. "Lots of trees over there, if it gets to be too popular a spot.."

Amanda nodded as they reached the end of the dock, leaning backward against one of the bollards, arms crossed over her chest. "I'm sorry," she said abruptly. "'Bout askin' you t' meet Manny. I should've known it wouldn't go well."

Blinking rapidly, Bethany quickly shook her head, hands already halfway to the witch's shoulders before she even realized they weren't in her pockets anymore. "You don't have anything to apologize to me for," she said firmly. "He's important to you, you wanted him to meet me."

"Yer important t' me too, babe. As soon as you said you had a problem with psis..." Amanda let her hands drop to Bethany's hips, pulled her in for a hug. "You got upset an' scared, for no good reason, an' that ain't right."

"He's a person first," Bethany insisted gently, trying to limit her hug to a hug, rather than a cling. "Psi second. I don't dislike him because he's a psi, I dislike him because he isn't my kind of a person." Yeah, that was diplomatic enough.

Amanda tightened her hug, feeling the tension in Bethany's frame. "Don't bullshit me, babe," she said quietly. "'S more than that, isn't it?"

"I don't want to be too unkind t'your boyfriend when you're in a good position to shove me into a lake," Bethany joked weakly, closing her eyes. "How honest d'you want me to be here?"

"As honest as you want t' be, babe," said Amanda, her voice catching a little at the thought that Bethany might feel she couldn't be straight with her. "You can tell me anythin', I thought you knew that."

Bethany nodded slowly, fingers twitching anxiously against Amanda's shoulders as she tried to figure out what, precisely, she should say. "It's a little different when you're tellin' somebody you care about that you think their boyfriend is an arrogant, self-centered asshole who only advocates tolerance when he wants it aimed at him," she murmured quietly. There. At least if she was going into the lake and getting a taxi home, it was for honesty.

"Thing is, yer'd be right." Amanda rested her cheek on Bethany's hair, holding her close despite the almost-unconscious pulling away the other girl was trying to do. "He is all that. But he's also..." She paused, trying to put it into words. "'S like there's another person, underneath all that. One who ain't a bastard. One who understands what it's like, what _I'm_ like, an' who loves me any way."

Don't cave to your temper, Bethany. That's what fucked last night up in the first place. Keeping her mouth shut until she was feeling a bit more like she could trust it, Bethany just nodded, giving up and letting the hug turn into more of a cling. "Guess it's just my lack of trust for assholes," she said finally, voice tight. "Too many bad experiences." She paused a moment, before adding something more muffled by the witch's shoulder. "I'd like t'think I do all that without bein' a bastard on top of it, but hey. He's first in line. My fault for sleepin' at the bat."

"Hey." Amanda nudged Bethany slightly with her shoulder, until the other girl looked up at her. "First up, you do some of that for me. You do. But... there's too much. Too much fucked up shite that I can never tell you, not without you never speakin' t' me again. Manny ain't the only arsehole around here." Bethany made to protest, but Amanda went on. "Second... there ain't no line, babe. There never was. I like t' think I can love you both, the same. You do somethin' for me that he can't - you make me happy. Bein' with you... fuck, I can't say how I feel when I'm with you." Biting her lip, Amanda looked down. "I don't want you t' leave, but if Manny's too much of an arsehole for you, if you can't..." She couldn't finish.

"You're assumin' an awful lot about me there," Bethany pointed out quietly, frowning and very lightly poking the other girl in the side. "If I can be honest with you, you can be honest with me. That's the deal, and it isn't somethin' that's up for negotiation, okay? You could never scare me off. Ever. Okay?" She drew in a deep breath before she leant over to press a kiss to Amanda's forehead, shifting her arms into a more supportive hug. "I'm afraid of him hurting you. He reminds me of.. stuff. So in his own bass-ackwards way, him being a prick's making me want to stay even more than I wanted to already. Just.. don't leave me alone with him, or feel like you can't talk to me about him, good or bad. I want to know what's goin' on with you, other than the Disaster of the Week, you know?" She smiled, if somewhat weakly. "I don't get t'see you as often, or as easy. I need to be told what I can't see."

"We should fix that. You not seein' me that often, an' then only after somethin's gone wrong," said Amanda, not hiding the relief she felt at Bethany not running for the hills. "An' Manny'd never hurt me. He'd rather lose his name than do that, even without factorin' in the whole link thing. Even if he tried... d'you really think I'd let him? I ain't that stupid."

"If he was that angry, he could make you let him," Bethany pointed out quietly - even if she felt guilty for having said it, she felt a little better for it, on the off-chance it wasn't something Amanda'd thought of. "Empath, remember?" With an apologetic smile, she let her hug tighten and pillowed her face comfortably against the other girl's cheek. "And you're one of the strongest, smartest people I know. S'why I'm so stupidly protective and paranoid."

"Witch, remember?" To demonstrate, Amanda cast her shielding spell around the two of them, the air shimmering blue for a few seconds. "I can block him," she said quietly. "The trainin' I've been gettin' from Strange... he's been teachin' me how t' protect meself from psychic attack. An' that includes Manny." She let the spell die. "An' I like it when yer protective of me. Makes me realise you care a lot about me."

Bethany made a thoughtful noise, trying to decide if she was relieved or not that Amanda already had apparently thought of such things.. eh, worry about it later. There were better things to focus on now - and they were past due, in her mind. "Of course I care a lot about you, you dope," she snorted, lifting her head so she could smile at her. "Gorgeous chicks I can be myself 'round don't come along every day, you know."

"I was wonderin' when yer'd notice that..." Amanda said with a slight smile, glad the hard part was over. Well, mostly over. There were still certain things she had to tell Beth, including just why she'd been grounded. But first she had to know whether Manuel had been right. "I couldn't help but notice before you came pretty close t' sayin' you loved me. Somethin' 'bout lovin' me any way?" she asked, keeping her tone carefully light.

The tone was.. odd, but if it was something Amanda didn't want to hear, Bethany figured 'light' wouldn't be the tone of voice getting used. "Was hoping I could get away with the oblique admission, a little," she admitted sheepishly, stubbornly keeping her attention on the other's face. This was not a time to study one's sneakers, however much she wanted to. Strength, Beth. "An' rather than sneak out of it by sayin' I seem to recall hearing you say somethin' about being capable of loving me an' him just the same.. yeah, I do. Love you, I mean." She shrugged casually, inclining her head slightly. "You're very lovable. I have been ensnared by the cute."

"You wouldn't be the first..." Amanda tried to keep up the joke, but that was overwhelmed by the desire to kiss Beth within an inch of her life. "So do I, babe. Didn't want t' say, 'cause you said you weren't up for anythin', an' there was Manny..."

"That sounds awfully familiar," Bethany chuckled, positively beaming as she leant forward to kiss the tip of Amanda's nose. And her cheek. And, hell, may as well get her forehead too, while she was there.. "You got plans this afternoon, at all?"

"Besides makin' up for lost time?" Amanda replied, before returning the favour by capturing Bethany's mouth with her own. When they broke off, however, there was a shadow in her eyes. "But first... there's somethin' I've gotta tell you. Two things, really. Then we can go an' have as much fun as you can handle, if you still want to, that is."

Bethany couldn't help but smile into the kiss, practically buzzing out of relief that things hadn't gone as horribly as she was afraid they would have. Still, Amanda had sobered, and her own smile softened considerably. "Nothing you could say will change my mind," she promised, reaching up to gently cup her cheeks with both hands. "I'm listenin', babe. Take it as quick or as slow as you need to."

Amanda closed her eyes, taking comfort in the touch. Quick was best - it gave her less time to chicken out. "First thing..." she said, looking into Bethany's eyes as steadily as she could. "The reason why I'm grounded. I got into a fight, like I said. With one of the other students here. It started off as just a fist fight, an' that's when I broke her nose. Only... it didn't stay that way. We started usin' powers, an' I ended up breakin' her arm as well." She swallowed. "I nearly bloody well killed her. Might've, if they hadn't stopped us."

Bethany blinked slowly, her eyebrows creeping up her forehead. "...what, you're scared that's gonna scare me off?" she asked, clearly surprised. "Amanda, honey, of course powers got involved.. when I get in a fight, I'm damn well using everything I've got to try and win it, it's only to be expected that you and what's-her-face wound up doin' the same thing. It's exactly the same, just.. well, just a bit more dangerous than me swingin' a skateboard at somebody's head." She shrugged helplessly, and offered what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "I'm still here, okay?"

Amanda blinked. _That_ wasn't the reaction she would have expected. Especially after the lectures she'd received on responsible uses of magic. "Um, right..." she said, uncertain now. "Yer not just a little bit worried? That I might hurt you if I do me rag or somethin'?"

"Are you worried I'm going to bludgeon you with my skateboard?" Bethany countered, giving Amanda a fondly exasperated look. "Of course I'm not worried. You're you."

"Save it until you hear the next bit, 'cause 'me' ain't always the most stable of people," Amanda replied, but with much less trepidation than she'd felt earlier. "'M a junkie," she said at last. "Me power... I'm hooked on it. An' sometimes, when it gets bad... well, I ain't proud of some of what I've done. An' I ain't exactly reliable then."

Bethany tilted her head, her brow knitting together in thought. She didn't think a mutation was something someone could get hooked on.. oh. Wait. That made sense. "But you're reliable the rest of the time," she said after a moment, watching the other girl's face. She wasn't afraid of her.. but for her was another story. "People who need to know 'bout this know, so you've got people here to watch you when I can't, right?"

Amanda nodded. "They all know, here. Moira an' Strange are helpin' me with it, an' there's people t' talk to, when things get bad. An' Manny..." She hesitated, and went on. "He helped me, more 'n anyone, this last time I fell off the wagon. He got me through the withdrawals, made sure I ate, an' slept..." She shrugged. "I'm tryin', it's just hard. Real hard."

She had been waiting for his name to come up, really, so Bethany simply nodded thoughtfully when it finally did. "I'm glad you told me," she said quietly. "You just tell me if I can do anythin' to help you, okay?" She paused for a moment, then tilted her head slightly. "You want me to come see Strange, next time you go? If you're afraid of hurtin' me next time it gets bad, we could talk to him, see if he could give me something to make sure you couldn't.. like a shinier version of the bracelet you gave me, or something?"

"I will, babe. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, it was just... I didn't want you thinkin' badly of me. People do, of junkies." All the confessions done, Amanda hugged Bethay tightly. "Yer a bloody marvel, you know that? All this, an' you barely bat an eye."

"I'm not gonna think badly of you for shit like that," Bethany scoffed, returning the hug just as tightly. "New Yorker, remember? Takes more'n addictions and a couple broken limbs to make us run away." She grinned and kissed Amanda on the cheek. "I'm a little afraid for you, but not of you. Never of you."

"I'll try an' keep the worryin' down t' a dull roar, all right?" said Amanda with a wry chuckle. "As much as I can, in this place." Cupping the other girl's face with her hand, she added. "No more secrets, love. Promise."

"Now you're just trying to make me go all melty and girly on you," Bethany murmured, smiling lazily. It was working. "Love you, too. Even if you're gonna kill my reputation, if you keep that up."

"But I like it when yer all melty and girly, 'specially on me," Amanda said with a frankly wicked look. "Think it's time t' find somewhere a bit more private?"

"Somewhere with a you and a blanket to cuddle up under does sound good," Bethany nodded, unable to keep from grinning at the wicked look she was getting. "Where to?"

"Well, Marie-Ange an' I have this code worked out where if the door's locked, the other one of us is busy..." She leaned in for another kiss. "'Sides, you ain't seen the new digs yet."

She pouted, just a little. "You mean we can't break her brain just a little?" Bethany asked mournfully. "Dreamwrecker. Okay, we'll lock it. I'll try not t'fall asleep on you so's it's worth the lock."

"I think you underestimate my ability t' keep you awake," said the witch, grinning wickedly. Then she looked concerned. "Unless you need t' sleep, that is. You can't have got much last night."

"I didn't come see you just so I could sleep on you all afternoon," Bethany snorted, making a bit of a face at the idea. "If I'm gonna sleep on you, it's gonna be at night, preferably when we're both going to be sleeping." She nodded once, and claimed herself a quick kiss before reluctantly beginning to disentangle herself, at least enough to let them walk back towards the house. "A lazy sort of afternoon does sound nice, though," she admitted grudgingly, with another small pout. "You an' me an' a blanket an' a movie, maybe?"

"Sounds like a great idea, babe." Amanda looped her arm around Bethany's waist, unwilling to let her go. "Lazy is just the ticket."

"There can be necking," Bethany decided, wrapping one arm around Amanda's shoulders. She wasn't particularly eager to let go, either. "Necking isn't too taxing, and it's one of my favorite things, you know."

"I'd noticed," chuckled Amanda, pressing a kiss to Beth's cheek before paying attention to the complicated task of walking. "'S one of the many, many things I like about you." A thought occurred to her, a memory of the previous night. "Now we know where we stand... are you gunna be all right? With the sharin' thing?"

Bethany leant her cheek into the kiss as she followed Amanda along, before slowly nodding her head. "Well, he an' I managed to coexist just fine before," she murmured thoughtfully. "It was just a little different. I think so? It isn't something I've done before, an' God knows I'm vaguely bitter that he's got such an easier time of seein' you than I do, but I think it'll be okay.. I'll tell you if it ever starts lookin' rocky?"

Amanda nodded. "You tell me anythin' you need to, babe. If this is gunna work, we'll need t' be able t' talk." She tightened her grip around Bethany's waist reassuringly. "Did I ever tell you 'bout Rom's situation?"

"I don't think so," Bethany murmured after a moment's thought, giving Amanda a curious look. "Will it delay you tellin' me more of the many, many things you like about me? Can we do both at once?"

"It can wait," Amanda said, smiling again. "Tellin' you how great you are is definitely more important." They were at the back steps now, and Amanda disentangled herself so they could actually get up the steps, taking Beth's hand instead. "Well, there's the fact yer dead sexy..." she began, as they walked inside.