xp_logs | Amanda, Nate - Sunday night

Nate drops by to check on Amanda, who is obviously not in the Happy Place. They talk, and plans are laid for a Great Escape.

Nathan paused in front of Amanda's door, feeling almost as hesitant as he had standing in front of Manuel's on Friday night. But he was getting a clear read on the room - his telepathy was a bit on the oversensitive side still - and Manuel was nowhere in the vicinity. So. He reached out and laid a hand on the door. #Amanda?# he called tentatively.

The reply was a sudden slamming down of shields, an almost physical sense of being pushed away, before it relaxed. After a few moments the door opened, and Amanda looked at him a little sheepishly. "Sorry 'bout that. You startled me. Come in." She looked tired, pale, somehow stretched, and she was bundled up in her layers of black again, the new clothes cast aside in favour of the familiar comfort of her old 'costume'.

"No need for apologies," Nathan said, trying not to wince at the impact of the 'push'. "You know," he said, moving forward into the room uncertainly, "I really ought to... uhh... talk to Charles, maybe, about whether or not you ought to be training as if you were a telekinetic. I'm beginning to think you effectively are, magically-based or not."

"I was doin' the psi-classes for a while, before I started gettin' into things more with Strange," she said, shrugging a little as she followed Nathan into the common room. She'd been watching some movie or other, one of Terry's Matt Damon collection, but she could've have said what it was about - her concentration was all over the place. She looked at him again, and her face fell a little. "I hurt you, didn't I?"

"No!" he assured her immediately. A bit too vehemently, judging by the way she flinched. "No," he said more gently, laying a hand on her shoulder very tentatively. "I was worried that I'd hurt you. Acting like I'm an alpha telepath or something." He offered her a rueful smile.

"'M all right," she said, but it was a lie. "Well, not that all right, but it ain't down t' you. You helped, if anythin'. I was so off me head, dunno what I might've done if you hadn't shut me down. Might've hurt Manny, even." A shadow clouded her face, and she turned away from him. "Makin' a habit of it, hurtin' people."

He opened his mouth to reassure her, then closed it again, thoughtfully. "Yeah," he said after a moment, slowly. "It has happened a number of times, hasn't it?"

"Lee. Remy. Manny, once. A couple of blokes who jumped me in town back when I was on that whole self-destructive kick." Amanda curled up on the sofa, knees pulled up against her chest. "'M losin' it, Nate. Can't keep it together. Fuck, I thought you were bloody Rack the other night - I must've been out of me fuckin' mind. An’ then this stuff with Illyana." She rested her forehead on her knees, hiding her face. "Maybe I am. Out of me mind. Feels like goin' mad would."

Nathan came over and sat down next to her, leaving just a little bit of space between them. "You're not going mad," he said quietly. "You're a young woman with too many gifts too often exploited, who's in a place that should be safe but for some reason refuses to be, for you. Your support structure comes and goes, and to top things off, you're linked to a still more-than-moderately screwed up young man." He smiled a bit tiredly. "So tell me, mi'caehla. How precisely are you supposed to have it together?"

"Buggered if I know," Amanda replied with a tired chuckle, head still down. Then she raised her head, looked at him, eyes far too big in her thin face. "I can't keep doin' this, Nate. Lurchin' from one disaster t' another. It feels like me life's some balmy carnival ride an' I can't get it t' slow down or stop long enough t' catch me breath."

Catch your breath... Nathan tilted his head, staring down at her for a moment. "All right then," he said, almost crisply. "Then it's time you got off for a little while, I think." He grinned suddenly, wryly. "I'm going to do it," he said, mock-seriously. "For you. I'm going to throw caution to the wind, seize the day, open the door and let chaos in. I'm going..." He paused dramatically. "...to call Dom."

Amanda blinked at him, nonplussed by the sudden swerve the conversation had taken. "Dom?" she asked, clearly puzzled - she'd forgotten her IM talk of a couple of weeks ago.

"Mmm-hmm. She told me about her idea to kidnap you. I'm beginning to think it had more merit than I gave it credit for." Nathan paused thoughtfully, considering the problem. "She'd have to talk Pete into it, of course. Him being your guardian and all... hell, she ought to take both of you. He could certainly use a few days away, too." He looked down at her and winked. "And Dom, I think, could talk Pete into almost anything."

"That she could," Amanda agreed. Going away with Dom and Pete... it was tempting. Extremely so. "There's school..." she said reluctantly, not really wanting to put the dampener on the idea, but it had to be said. "I'm just startin' t' catch up, I can't fall behind again."

"A few days is not going to put you too far behind," Nathan said firmly. "And when it comes to your language courses, you're well ahead of the curve anyway." He shook his head. "School can wait," he said more softly. "Don't fall into the trap that so many of us adult-types do, hanging around in a situation that's driving us crazy because we have responsibilities."

"I'm ahead? Wicked." Amanda grinned, momentarily distracted by the new and heady rush of academic achievement. Then she focussed again. "If Pete thinks it's all right, then yeah, I'd like to. Said t' Ange I needed t' get away, but I don't wanna go back t' Rom - I always feel like a fuck-up when I go crawlin' back t' her."

"Well, then, Dom's the perfect answer. You can go off, have some fun - " Although he definitely wanted a much, much clearer idea of what Dom had in mind before anything took place. " - and come back all rested and rejuvenated and stuff."

"'S that allowed? Havin' fun an' relaxin' an' all the rest?" Amanda asked, mostly joking, but there was the slightest touch of bitterness to it.

"Not just allowed, but encouraged." Nathan reached out, still hesitant, and put an arm around her shoulders. "And Dom's something of an expert on relaxing, you know. Scary as her methods can be sometimes. Did I ever tell you about the time she got me drunk in Moscow and I woke up on stage at the Bolshoi?"

It took everything she had not to flinch at the contact, but she managed it. She was so bloody jumpy still... The little kids had run past her in the hall that morning, startling the life out of her, and she'd given herself another headache when the shielding spell flashed up automatically. "Were there pictures? Think I'd pay good money t' see shots of you in a tutu."

"I didn't say I was in a tutu, did I? Just that I woke up on stage." Nathan squeezed her shoulder gently, then removed his hand, not having missed the suppressed flinch. "Anyway," he went on more briskly. "I'll call Dom. We'll see what we can come up wtih to convince Pete."

"Thanks. Yer a life saver. Possibly literally." She swallowed, reached out and patted his arm. "'M sorry. Jumpy still. There's... memories, stuff I'd forgotten. 'M still doin' the mental repackin'. An' 'Yana's friends didn't help."

"You don't need to explain," he said softly, laying his hand over hers for a moment. "Not to me, of all people."

"I know." Amanda took a deep breath, trying to regain her equilibrium - she was all over the place still. "Just... I don't wanna hurt you. Ever. An' I nearly did, if the mess I made in Manny's room is anythin' t' go by."

"Don't worry about that, at least," he reassured her gently. "I may have a sprained brain, but I can still manage a couple of TK shields perfectly well. Nothing touched either me or Manuel, and to be honest, I think I did more damage to his things than you did."

"He ain't happy 'bout it. He didn't say anythin' much, but he's pissed off. Mostly 'cause the money's runnin' out, I think." Nathan didn't like it when she talked about Manuel in any sense, she knew that, so she changed the focus a little. "You were sayin' when you came in, 'bout teachin' me like a telekinetic? You think it'd work? I was off me head, but I got the feelin' I was doin' a lot more that night than I have before."

"You were," Nathan said with a thoughtful frown. "More, and stronger - I was having to work, to keep you from tearing the room apart, and without being arrogant, that says a lot." He grinned at her a bit sheepishly. "I'll have to talk to Charles, but it might be worth looking into."

"Considerin' Dom told me you blew up a buildin' with yer TK once, it ain't arrogant at all." Amanda said somewhat faintly. She'd made Nathan work? "I ain't sure, but I think I'm drawin' more power off this amulet, can cope with it better. Me tolerance got bigger in Asgard, an' then again when I started usin' again." She shook her head. "Still wouldn't be enough. Tho' you get those stories 'bout hidden reserves an' stress an' the like. Maybe it was that."

"Willpower," Nathan said after a moment. "I'm not sure how your magical TK works, but if it's anything like mine..." He paused, shrugged. "I'm still not sure how I managed to hold the Blackbird in the air and shield it from Shiro's blast that day."

"Not a lot of will behind mine, just wantin' t' get away..." Amanda frowned slightly at the memory. "But if yer sayin' bein' stubborn's part of it, then yeah, 's like that for both of us. You didn't drop the plane 'cause you were too stubborn t' let it go."

"Stubbornness is just what people call other people's willpower being exercised," Nathan said placidly.