Madelyn, Kurt - Saturday evening

[x-madelyn.livejournal.com]

Set after Madelyn's post to the community but before the staff post from Alison. Madelyn has a small nervous breakdown in the wake of the shooting, and Kurt is there to catch her.



Everyone was safe. Madelyn had to keep reminding herself of that. She acted automatically as she and Moira got Doug stabilised, and Angie taken care of, but once everyone was settled and the note to the journals written, she'd excused herself and retreated to her office, where the shakes started. So close to losing one. So damned close. And the worst of it was that it shouldn't have happened at all.

Kurt, having seen her post to the journals, decided to go and check on her. Teleporting down to the medlab in the interest of not wasting time, he knocked tentatively on her office door when he didn't see her in the public areas. "Madelyn?"

"Just a minute..." Taking several deep breaths, Madelyn willed away the reaction, pulled herself together. 'C'mon, kiddo, no time for Maddie now. They need Doctor Bartlett', she told herself. When she was satisfied she could hold a conversation without falling to pieces, she opened the door. "Kurt. What do you need me for?"

"Nothing, really", came the slightly worried answer. "I thought perhaps you might need company."

Well, that was unexpected. The surprise succeeded in doing what few other things could - it broke Madelyn's composure. "Company would be... good," she said, trying to laugh but it coming out too shaky to be precisely that. "God, Kurt, I can't believe we nearly lost him..." The laugh became a half-sob, and she half-turned away from him, burying her face in her hands. "Shit," she said, muffled. "Sorry, give me a minute here."

Kurt moved to her side, laying a gentle hand on her shoulder, tacitly offering a hug if she wanted it. "Madelyn. Your patients are all sleeping peacefully. You are allowed a moment's weakness."

The gesture undid her completely, and she moved into the offered hug, clutching at his shoulders almost depserately. "I saw him fall, Kurt, I heard the shot and I saw him fall, and I was positive he was... And then there was that damned Kevlar... I couldn't get it off quickly enough, I thought I was going to lose him any way."

Kurt held her close, letting her take all the comfort she could from it. "But we did not. You did not. You did good work today."

"It shouldn't have happened at all!" Madleyn burst out. "My God, Kurt, he's been sitting on this for ages, must have been, to plan all this, to write those emails... Angie's been bitching about him being busy on a project, even though there were no assignments that major handed out by any of the staff, and now it all makes sense! He knew, and he couldn't tell any of us, and he's been carrying it all this time..." She leaned her head against Kurt's shoulder, let the tears fall, finally. "How can we help them when they don't trust us to, Kurt?"

Kurt brought his tail up to wrap around her waist in an added expression of security. "Doug is clever, and usually sensible. He would have looked at every possible aspect of this, and seen no other way around it than what he did. Which is not to say he should not have asked for help... a telepath or a telekinetic could have ended the threat before it was there, with proper attention, and I do not know why he failed to see that."

"That poor kid, carrying it all this time... I don't know whether to kill him or hug him." Reining herself in a bit, but not letting go, Madelyn looked up at Kurt with a watery, grateful smile. "Thanks."

He shook his head slightly. "You needed it. It was no problem."

"Doctors aren't supposed to need it," she reminded him wryly. "God, Kurt, I don't know how much more of this I can take. The ER... it was easier to keep your distance there. Sure you got your regular patients, but for the most part, it was strangers. Having to do CPR on a kid you see in the halls every day, not knowing if he's going to make it or not until his heart starts up again..." She shuddered a little. "They didn't cover this in the contract when I signed up for this gig."

Kurt nodded sadly. "I think everyone is always hoping it will not happen, and perhaps expecting that it will not. Which is the way it should be, and makes it that much worse when things go wrong."

"At least in the FBI my patients were always dead to start with..." Madelyn shook her head. "Gah, I didn't just say that."

Kurt nodded. "And I never heard it. Given the circumstances, I think everything has ended as well as it could possibly have done. Doug is not even seriously hurt."

"Yes, I know. I know that." Beginning to extricate herself from the hug, Madelyn made another effort to pull herself together. Resting or not, she had patients. And there were still those emails to deal with.

Kurt released her and stepped back a little, letting her regain her composure. "We got him", he reminded her. "He will not be a threat again."

"Small mercies, eh?" Madelyn said with another, stronger smile. "Do we know who he was after? Or was it one of those random mutant hate crimes?"

"Random, I believe", Kurt answered sombrely. "As far as I could work out, he was aiming for Rahne, of all people, before Doug got in the way. Perhaps because she was wearing Red X insignia."

"As if demons and military operations aren't enough, we have to get the random crackpots as well..." sighed Madelyn. "I should go check on things, make sure Moira's okay - Angie cracked her a good one on the shin, and I left her with an ice pack on it." She reached out and squeezed Kurt's shoulder. "Thanks again. It's good to have friends. Especially ones who can hug as well as you."

Kurt nodded, catching her hand and squeezing it when it fell. "If you need me, for time outside the mansion or anything else, you know where I am."

"Somehow I think I'll be taking you up on that sooner rather than later," she replied, holding onto his hand for a few seconds longer. "Okay, once more into the breach, and all that. I'll talk to you later, Elf."



OOC: Apologies for the lack of links, LJ is being a pain with that Invalid Error thing...