xp_logs | Sunday night: Sarah and Jono.

Sarah and Jono. It's not just the boiler room that brings Sarah solace.

The boiler room. Jono stopped at the door, hand on the handle, realising there was someone else inside. He blinked and opened the door. "Hi, Spikey," he said into the semi-dark, as close to smiling as he could.

Sarah looked up from her seat on the floor, chin tucked up on her knees, and arms wrapped around her legs like she was hugging herself. Maybe she was. There was a long silence before she actually bothered to say anything, but she didn't really need to. Everything about her screamed that this had been a bad day. Probably a bad week as well. Unfolding to tuck her hair behind her horns, she nodded in response. "Hey."

Wondering if the place still felt reassuring to Sarah too, Jono walked across the room, sliding down the wall to sit next to her. He could feel her hurt resonating in the air, and briefly felt glad he wasn't an empath. "Want to share?"

Sarah glanced to the floor to her other side, and picked up a nearly empty cigarette pack. "Almost out again." The last cigarette fell from the container, and picking it up from her lap, she lit it with her lighter in her other hand. "The joys of chain smoking in an enclosed space, huh?"

"It's not like either of us is going to get lung cancer." Jono inched a bit closer, laying his head on her shoulder. "Want to sulk or talk?"

"You want to hear it?" she took a long drag from her cigarette while she waited for a response, her free hand picking at the bone on her knee. She added dryly, "It's not nearly as interesting as falling apart."

"Trust me, falling apart gets old really fast." He elbowed her. "Tell me. You've listened to me whinge enough."

There was another pause, and she finally squirmed closer to him. "I don't think I can stay here. Not where I don't belong, and where the fucker who murdered my family is welcomed. And I'm a bad person for wanting to kill him. Because I'm obviously going to eat Artie and Leech in their sleep." It's bad enough my boyfriend won't even come back...

"I'm not sure I know anyone who can churn out trouble as fast as you", Jono muttered, watching the glowing end of the cigarette travel up to Sarah's mouth and down again. He touched her arm, not having any words of comfort. "Where do you think you'll go?"

"I'll take that as a compliment," Sarah sighed, but sounding fairly unhappy about it. About everything. She shrugged. "Somewhere. I don't know. Maybe I'll surprise him."

He nodded against her shoulder, feeling a strange oppressive sensation in his chest. Which he could've only imagined as there was hardly anything left of his chest. "I think I should say for the record I don't want you to go. Who's going to- I don't know. I just don't want you to go, all right?"

"I know." She fell silent, curled up beside him. Finally came a quiet "You won't be angry with me?"

Jono didn't say anything for a while, just ran his fingertips up and down her arm. "I'll miss you," he finally said, choked almost.

"Shh.." she murmured, voice wavering. "You talk like that, and I'll kidnap you and take you with me."

"Well, what else am I supposed to say?" he rolled his shoulders against the concrete walls behind them, looking up at the shadow-dressed ceiling. "I'll be fucking pissed off to watch you leave because I'm stuck here if I want to live. And you'll be gone."

Sarah watched him silently, finishing her cigarette and putting it out on the concrete. I'm sorry.

"Maybe you are," Jono replied immediately. Sometimes it seemed he couldn't make the difference between spoken and thought words anymore. "But that isn't going to stop you from leaving, is it?"

"I can't stay here much longer." She looked away at the wall beside her. Letters written in blood in the dark. "I can keep putting it off because I don't want to leave you, but it doesn't change the fact that I don't belong here. And as far as they're concerned, I'm no better than the ex-killer they've got shacking up in the boathouse. No, I'm -worse-."

Jono glowered at her, seeming like he wanted to say something, but then subsided, slumping against her. "I know you can take care of yourself, wherever you go," he said, avoiding what she had said. "But you know you can always come back." Maybe it was a false hope, but Jono did hope she would.

"To visit maybe. Not to stay. I'm not one of their superheroes in training. I'm damaged, and violent, and well, you know." She stopped for a moment, and nudged him gently. "This place is for people with a -future-."

That jolted Jono a bit more than she had probably thought and he frowned. "Then I should just come with you, shouldn't I?"

"I didn't mean it like that." She looked down at him, with a determined look. You are not going ANYWHERE.

He flapped one hand, starting to get a bit angry. "Right, because this is as much a place for people who can't go anywhere else, as it is for those who actually have that future you mentioned. Too bad I'm in the former category."

"You're twisting my words, Sparky," she sighed quietly, backing off. He was the last person she wanted to fight with right now. "I meant that you did have a future. Because I tend to believe that you're going to be okay. Call me crazy."

"Hello, morlock? Doesn't insanity go with the territory? That's what I always believed." Jono shook his head, and glared around the room for a while, trying to calm down because he knew his condition could only get worse when he was emotional.

"No, just me. That's what makes me a bad person. That, and the fact that I apparently can't get a point across without making my best friend feel worthless." Tentatively, she curled up closer to him. Please don't be angry... I'm trying to help and... ah, fuck. I'm just going to shut up now.

Jono's head connected to the wall with a little thud, two times, then he pulled her almost into his lap, hugging her. "Don't you know I always feel worthless?" he muttered. "Maybe you are madder than the hatter, but it doesn't mean you're a bad person. You're my friend. My Spikey."

She didn't stop squirming until there was no room between them, head buried in his shoulder. "If you were worthless, I'd have told you to get the hell out already, Nightlight. You're still here."

"That's never stopped you before from telling me to fuck off," he reminded her. "In fact, those might be the most commonly used words between us."

"Fuck is a great word. So many different shades of meaning. I can tell you to fuck off, and then tell Marko to fuck off and mean something entirely different." She was still mumbling the words in his shoulder, but the words were broadcasting in her head as well, albeit muddled with laughter that wasn't making it out.

There was a quiet moment, then a bubble of amusement seemed to burst inside Jono and he nuzzled his head against hers. "Fuck you and this fucking fuckity fuck."

She smiled against him, finally twisting her head to look up at him. "Fuck you too, Sparky. Fucking fucker."

Somehow, that never ceased to be funny for them, and Jono felt, not much, but a bit better. Maybe it wasn't the end of the world again. Maybe long-distance friendships actually worked. "Well, yeah. That's not changing the fact that you're leaving. What're you going to do out there?" Out there, surprising how easy it was to say, as if the rest of the world had nothing to do with them.

"Whatever I want. I don't even have to pretend to play nice." She grinned. "In fact, Shinobi likes it when I don't play nice."

"You're not fooling anyone, you never play nice." Jono lapsed back into silence, almost clinging to her, then asked the one more important question: "When are you leaving?"

"Just because I haven't fooled you, doesn't mean I haven't fooled anybody else." She wrapped a hand around his, resting her head back against his shoulder. "Soon. End of this week maybe?"

"You don't waste time, do you?" Jono's chest moved as if he was sighing. "D'you think you've got the energy to do something reckless with me later this week, before you go?"

"Reckless? I'm in." She smiled again, curling up closer though there was no room to move closer, really. "What're we doing?"

"I suppose we'll think of something." He tried to sound uplifting, but that had never really been what he did best.

"I'd suggest going to get plastered, but too many people would object to that, I think. Course, that never stopped us before."

"We'll think of something," Jono said, confident of that, at least.

"Of course we will. And we'll take pictures to add to your reckless parties photo album." She squeezed his hand, nuzzling his neck. "Stay for a while? I'd just.. I'd like to just -sit-. With you."

He nodded. And stayed.